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"Short Poem Competition Returns"

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Wed 11/08/04 at 21:35
Regular
"Incomprehendible"
Posts: 2,938
Hey all. Discodexy asked if someone would start a new one of these competitions, so here goes.

Rules:

-Maximum of, shall we say, 200 words?
-The word to base it around is "pain", you can easily get something out of that.

I'm going on holiday on Sunday but will judge soon after I get back. Shall we say, entries in by 2nd September, and I will judge them and name the top three poems on the 4th September. This gives people plenty of time to get their entries in.

Post your poems in this thread!

Enjoy

RESULTS!

3rd Place goes to Mav for this entry...

Pain.
Makes me feel insane,
It comes and goes
My mind is slain,
Withdrawn, retreated,
A wounded fawn,
Nothing is here for me,
Nothing will help.

It rises up - the pain in me,
Even alone, I feel its grip,
No pressure, no feeling,
Just the horror of it,
I fall, neglected,
A victim, rejected,
My mind is affected
In ways I accept it,
But I can't help but give in,
It overthrows me, commands,
I'm suffocating, holding out my arms,
Grasping for help, but I slip away,
Unnoticed, uncared for, there's no other way,
They don't know about me, neither do you,
I drift through crowds,
Invisible.

Yet my pain remains, I live in vain,
Because I can't.
There's no going forward,
No going back,
To these people I'm a pet,
They call me Jack.


2nd place goes to Grebo, for this entry...

"In mute mental anguish,
We are divided by allegiances,
Our stoppered emotions,
Precipitating smouldering conflagrations,
And explosions of patience,
Whether soul-less happiness,
Or soul-full despair,
Inciting reactions of ineffectuality,
Leading to solitude,
Always looking to reason,
But finding indefatigable naiveté,
Always leading, leading, leading,
Downwards spiralling,
To an ultimate climax,
Rushing, insisting,
and pressing the balance,
Losing our equilibrium,
Leading, leading,
Subconscious observations,
Of intellectual depravations,
And self imposed mental anarchy,
Giving stunning inspirations,
Revelations of reality,
Dawning from obscurity,
Losing, losing,
Humour engulfed,
Mind retreating,
Downwards spiralling,
Self absorbed,
Comatose,
Eventual emotional flat liner."


and the winner is... Azul! For his entry, I've got the Power...

My remorseful soul, a prism of unrest;
Summer rains replenishing and tender
And shadowy clouds ebb and flow with jest;
A ray of gold pierces them with splendour
As light hits my soul and splits into a rainbow.
The valley echoes with my brothers cries
And fields of faith bloom with hope as they grow.
I see my beacon shine through broken skies:

Sapphire birds dance through the eloquent air
And roses sway in the winds of grandeur.
The beauty overwhelms as petals wear,
and hated barbs play a hurtful overture.
The thorns puncture my heart with woeful pain -
I'm smiling; meaningfully going insane

Congratulations Azul, you've won the satisfaction of knowing I thought your poem was better than all the other entries.

Thanks to everyone who entered (especially Mattribute, who put in loads of short, often odd, poems), I just thought these were the best of the lot. Anyone that wants to start the next competition with their own word is free to do so.

Cheers

*HE*
Page:
Fri 20/08/04 at 00:56
Regular
"tokyo police club"
Posts: 12,540
Blank wrote:
> He's right though
>
>
>


So beautiful... Life imitating art
Fri 20/08/04 at 00:54
Regular
"twothousandandtits"
Posts: 11,024
He's right though
Fri 20/08/04 at 00:52
Regular
"tokyo police club"
Posts: 12,540
J Nash

[I]Always a critic
never a star
WHY DON'T YOU HAT OFF
Fri 20/08/04 at 00:49
Regular
"Teal'c"
Posts: 3,617
You have all made very poor poems.
Fri 20/08/04 at 00:48
Regular
"tokyo police club"
Posts: 12,540
Dear Memo

[I]You brighten my days
with that fire-hair on your head
Fri 20/08/04 at 00:46
Regular
"twothousandandtits"
Posts: 11,024
Memorandum is

FAT
Fri 20/08/04 at 00:46
Regular
"tokyo police club"
Posts: 12,540
Time Trials
[I]
I remember the Time Trials
I briefly pwnd j00 all
n00bz
I knew ever short cut, could
cut any corner
but, despite my genius,
couldn't powerslide

and STILL pwnd j00
Fri 20/08/04 at 00:45
Regular
"aka memo aaka gayby"
Posts: 11,948
Mario Kart: Super Circuit

none of you plebs
could ever rival me
at this wondrous game
FACT
Fri 20/08/04 at 00:40
Regular
"tokyo police club"
Posts: 12,540
Payback

[I]Hump you,
I shall
Like Yoda,
I talk
Needed
is some lube
Is mine,
your ass
Fri 20/08/04 at 00:36
Regular
"twothousandandtits"
Posts: 11,024
Dignity, My Dear Friend

*Drops pants*
Page:

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