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As I think back to the days when our unquenchable thirst for each other was fervent in love, distinct flashbacks swiftly appear and disappear at the back of my already distracted and occupied mind. A smile breaks out across my carefree face as I remember our days together; I am powerless to prevent such a show of emotion. When I remember passionate bursts of affection we use to feel in our once such warm and happy hearts, I am reminded of the day my cherry coloured heart fell victim to your piercing cerulean sword of bitterness. The moment of which all my strides and labours in love and life, all my drudgery and toil came to a sour finale at the expenditure of a single instance.
Contemplating it alone is painful enough, re-living it is excruciating. Wait no – unbearable. Constant reminders of what we use to have, what we could still have, what we should still have tease me in an almost intolerant degree of deliberate and yet subtle mockery. Untold frustration to those around me surrounds my every glimmer at life so rich and happiness so plentiful amongst the satisfied superior in stature. Conversation remains strictly down to the necessities, no-one can know and no-one will know the untold tales of the past, which evade every man and woman in my new and disappointing life. Half empty, my heart pleads for the love once so natural and free. The type of love so pure that it requires no guilty gifts or complementary comments, the type which is showed in a home cooked meal or a goodnight kiss – it’s customary, routine. That’s the type of love we used to have, the type they call chemistry; they said we had the balanced formula. Yet you had to ruin the ‘modus operandi’ we once had. You decided that you weren’t fulfilled with our rich rewarding lives, instead resolute upon obsession with the cold, unsavoury nature of worthless money. I’m hollow inside; all the charisma that you built up inside me has deserted my body and there’s a void space reserved in my soul. I’m empty inside.
Selfish instigation on your part has me doubting every living, breathing creature that walks this planet. How can I ever trust anything again? How can I ever love anything again? How can I ever look at anything again? My world has fallen, like the rushing of an impatient stream or the descent of a departed soul. How much longer I can hold myself together, pull myself up; continue with this predictable of lifestyles? Without my life blood I’m lost, swimming in a river of blindness. I’m directionless without you, I’m headed for oblivion, but I can’t see where my fate lies. As I sit here in this bare and dusty room, with a knife for company – my sanity pleading, I draw the knife closer to my throat. 3mm from death, but it doesn’t have to be like this. No wait – you had to make it like this, but I have to live with this, if only for a few more seconds of reflection.
Just remember me, that worm-food lying in that box, six foot under, still clutching our times so good. Forever mine, forever yours will I love you.
Yours departed.
Contemplating it alone is painful enough, re-living it is excruciating. Wait no – unbearable. Constant reminders of what we use to have, what we could still have, what we should still have tease me in an almost intolerant degree of deliberate and yet subtle mockery. Untold frustration to those around me surrounds my every glimmer at life so rich and happiness so plentiful amongst the satisfied superior in stature. Conversation remains strictly down to the necessities, no-one can know and no-one will know the untold tales of the past, which evade every man and woman in my new and disappointing life. Half empty, my heart pleads for the love once so natural and free. The type of love so pure that it requires no guilty gifts or complementary comments, the type which is showed in a home cooked meal or a goodnight kiss – it’s customary, routine. That’s the type of love we used to have, the type they call chemistry; they said we had the balanced formula. Yet you had to ruin the ‘modus operandi’ we once had. You decided that you weren’t fulfilled with our rich rewarding lives, instead resolute upon obsession with the cold, unsavoury nature of worthless money. I’m hollow inside; all the charisma that you built up inside me has deserted my body and there’s a void space reserved in my soul. I’m empty inside.
Selfish instigation on your part has me doubting every living, breathing creature that walks this planet. How can I ever trust anything again? How can I ever love anything again? How can I ever look at anything again? My world has fallen, like the rushing of an impatient stream or the descent of a departed soul. How much longer I can hold myself together, pull myself up; continue with this predictable of lifestyles? Without my life blood I’m lost, swimming in a river of blindness. I’m directionless without you, I’m headed for oblivion, but I can’t see where my fate lies. As I sit here in this bare and dusty room, with a knife for company – my sanity pleading, I draw the knife closer to my throat. 3mm from death, but it doesn’t have to be like this. No wait – you had to make it like this, but I have to live with this, if only for a few more seconds of reflection.
Just remember me, that worm-food lying in that box, six foot under, still clutching our times so good. Forever mine, forever yours will I love you.
Yours departed.
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Oh oh. This is only the second one I've read today. I'm sensing a pattern of stories emerging here.
There are some very nice lines in this piece.
There are some very nice lines in this piece.
I'm currently on the floor in hysterics.
Oh, and nice story FF.
Oh, and nice story FF.
I shall, from this point forth, incorporate cerulean into my lexis.
A nice way to explore emotions, keep up the good work.
Paradox: wrote:
> However I have no idea what Cerulean means, and you said "void
> space", both words meaning the same thing.
Thanks Para, have a good holiday today too. Cerulean is a little known word for a shade of very bright, quite light blue. No defence for the 'void space' though. :)
> However I have no idea what Cerulean means, and you said "void
> space", both words meaning the same thing.
Thanks Para, have a good holiday today too. Cerulean is a little known word for a shade of very bright, quite light blue. No defence for the 'void space' though. :)
Veeeeeery nice. The imagery was superb, and the lexical choices were great.
However I have no idea what Cerulean means, and you said "void space", both words meaning the same thing.
However I have no idea what Cerulean means, and you said "void space", both words meaning the same thing.
Wow, most impressive, keep on like this and slowly but surely you'll be writing winners.
And while this probably won't win, it was still a really well written piece. The only thing I could pick at would be some of the over usage of describing words and phrases that made your piece thorny to read. But by the same token there were a couple of tremendous descriptions, I remember, "swimming in a river of blindness" particularly. An excellent way of describing the emotions.
Nice, an improvement on your last attempt that could have done with flowing a little better, but really, really good nevertheless.
And while this probably won't win, it was still a really well written piece. The only thing I could pick at would be some of the over usage of describing words and phrases that made your piece thorny to read. But by the same token there were a couple of tremendous descriptions, I remember, "swimming in a river of blindness" particularly. An excellent way of describing the emotions.
Nice, an improvement on your last attempt that could have done with flowing a little better, but really, really good nevertheless.
As I think back to the days when our unquenchable thirst for each other was fervent in love, distinct flashbacks swiftly appear and disappear at the back of my already distracted and occupied mind. A smile breaks out across my carefree face as I remember our days together; I am powerless to prevent such a show of emotion. When I remember passionate bursts of affection we use to feel in our once such warm and happy hearts, I am reminded of the day my cherry coloured heart fell victim to your piercing cerulean sword of bitterness. The moment of which all my strides and labours in love and life, all my drudgery and toil came to a sour finale at the expenditure of a single instance.
Contemplating it alone is painful enough, re-living it is excruciating. Wait no – unbearable. Constant reminders of what we use to have, what we could still have, what we should still have tease me in an almost intolerant degree of deliberate and yet subtle mockery. Untold frustration to those around me surrounds my every glimmer at life so rich and happiness so plentiful amongst the satisfied superior in stature. Conversation remains strictly down to the necessities, no-one can know and no-one will know the untold tales of the past, which evade every man and woman in my new and disappointing life. Half empty, my heart pleads for the love once so natural and free. The type of love so pure that it requires no guilty gifts or complementary comments, the type which is showed in a home cooked meal or a goodnight kiss – it’s customary, routine. That’s the type of love we used to have, the type they call chemistry; they said we had the balanced formula. Yet you had to ruin the ‘modus operandi’ we once had. You decided that you weren’t fulfilled with our rich rewarding lives, instead resolute upon obsession with the cold, unsavoury nature of worthless money. I’m hollow inside; all the charisma that you built up inside me has deserted my body and there’s a void space reserved in my soul. I’m empty inside.
Selfish instigation on your part has me doubting every living, breathing creature that walks this planet. How can I ever trust anything again? How can I ever love anything again? How can I ever look at anything again? My world has fallen, like the rushing of an impatient stream or the descent of a departed soul. How much longer I can hold myself together, pull myself up; continue with this predictable of lifestyles? Without my life blood I’m lost, swimming in a river of blindness. I’m directionless without you, I’m headed for oblivion, but I can’t see where my fate lies. As I sit here in this bare and dusty room, with a knife for company – my sanity pleading, I draw the knife closer to my throat. 3mm from death, but it doesn’t have to be like this. No wait – you had to make it like this, but I have to live with this, if only for a few more seconds of reflection.
Just remember me, that worm-food lying in that box, six foot under, still clutching our times so good. Forever mine, forever yours will I love you.
Yours departed.
Contemplating it alone is painful enough, re-living it is excruciating. Wait no – unbearable. Constant reminders of what we use to have, what we could still have, what we should still have tease me in an almost intolerant degree of deliberate and yet subtle mockery. Untold frustration to those around me surrounds my every glimmer at life so rich and happiness so plentiful amongst the satisfied superior in stature. Conversation remains strictly down to the necessities, no-one can know and no-one will know the untold tales of the past, which evade every man and woman in my new and disappointing life. Half empty, my heart pleads for the love once so natural and free. The type of love so pure that it requires no guilty gifts or complementary comments, the type which is showed in a home cooked meal or a goodnight kiss – it’s customary, routine. That’s the type of love we used to have, the type they call chemistry; they said we had the balanced formula. Yet you had to ruin the ‘modus operandi’ we once had. You decided that you weren’t fulfilled with our rich rewarding lives, instead resolute upon obsession with the cold, unsavoury nature of worthless money. I’m hollow inside; all the charisma that you built up inside me has deserted my body and there’s a void space reserved in my soul. I’m empty inside.
Selfish instigation on your part has me doubting every living, breathing creature that walks this planet. How can I ever trust anything again? How can I ever love anything again? How can I ever look at anything again? My world has fallen, like the rushing of an impatient stream or the descent of a departed soul. How much longer I can hold myself together, pull myself up; continue with this predictable of lifestyles? Without my life blood I’m lost, swimming in a river of blindness. I’m directionless without you, I’m headed for oblivion, but I can’t see where my fate lies. As I sit here in this bare and dusty room, with a knife for company – my sanity pleading, I draw the knife closer to my throat. 3mm from death, but it doesn’t have to be like this. No wait – you had to make it like this, but I have to live with this, if only for a few more seconds of reflection.
Just remember me, that worm-food lying in that box, six foot under, still clutching our times so good. Forever mine, forever yours will I love you.
Yours departed.
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