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*bleeds*
> it's horribly chewy, and nasty. and manky.
Yup, it's essentially white rubber, cut into little cubes.
Imagine our table of 5 on the China school trip:
"Ooh, chicken, and... some brown stuff, and, eurgh, tofu"
"Right, everyone, on the count of three, each take a cube of tofu and swallow. 1...2...3.. *gulp*"
Cue Chinese waitress
"We have crispy chicken, brown seaweed and shark"
"Shark?!"
"Yus"
"MY SPLEEN"