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"Gothic - Is your child or yourself a Goth?"

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Sun 18/07/04 at 22:07
Regular
"Led Zeppelin"
Posts: 3,214
If Your Child is a Gothic, Reform Through the Lord!

Listed below are some warning signs to indicate if your child may have gone astray from the Lord.

Gothic (or goth) is a very obscure and often dangerous culture that young teenagers are prone to participating in. The gothic culture leads young, susceptible minds into an imagined world of evil, darkness, and violence. Please seek immediate attention through counselling, prayer, and parental guidance to rid your child of Satan's temptations if five or more of the following are applicable to your child:

-Frequently wears black clothing.
-Wears band and/or rock t-shirts.
-Wears excessive black eye makeup, lipstick or nailpolish.
-Wears any odd, silver jewelry or symbols. Some of these include: reversed crosses, pentagrams, pentacles, ankhs or various other Satanic worshipping symbols.
-Shows an interest in piercings or tattoos.
-Listens to gothic or any other anti-social genres of music. (Marilyn Manson claims to be the anti-Christ, and publicly speaks against the Lord. Please discard any such albums IMMEDIATELY.)
-Associates with other people that dress, act or speak eccentrically.
-Shows a declining interest in wholesome activities, such as: the Bible, prayer, church or sports.
-Shows an increasing interest in death, vampires, magic, the occult, witchcraft or anything else that involves Satan.
-Takes drugs.
-Drinks alcohol.
-Is suicidal and/or depressed.
-Cuts, burns or partakes in any other method of self-mutilation. (This is a Satanic ritual that uses pain to detract from the light of God and His love. Please seek immediate attention for this at your local mental health center.)
-Complains of boredom.
-Sleeps too excessively or too little.
-Is excessively awake during the night.
-Dislikes sunlight or any other form of light. (This pertains to vampires promoting the idea that His light is of no use.)
-Demands an unusual amount of privacy.
-Spends large amounts of time alone.
-Requests time alone and quietness. (This is so that your chid may speak to evil sprits through meditation.)
-Insists on spending time with friends while unaccompanied by an adult.
-Disregards authority figures; teachers, priests, nuns and elders are but a few examples of this.
-Misbehaves at school.
-Misbehaves at home.
-Eats excessively or too little.
-Eats goth-related foods. Weetos cereal is an example of this.
-Drinks blood or expresses an interest in drinking blood. (Vampires believe this is how to attain Satan. This act is very dangerous and should be stopped immediately.)
-Watches sky television or any other corrupted media sources. (Ask your local church for proper programs that your child may watch.)
-Plays videos games that contains violence or role-playing nature.
-Uses the internet excessively and frequently makes time for the computer.
-Makes Satanic symbols and/or violently shakes head to music.
-Dances to music in a provocative or sexual manner.
-Expresses an interest in sex.
-M'sturbates
-Is homosexual and/or bisexual.
-Pursues dangerous cult religions. Such include: Satanism, Scientology, Philosophy, Paganism, Wicca, Hinduism and Buddhism.
-Wears pins, stickers or anything else that contains these various phrases: "I'm so gothic, I'm dead", "woe is me", "I'm a goth".
-Claims to be a goth.

If twenty or more of these apply to your child, please intervene immediately. The gothic culture is dangerous and Satan thrives within it. If any of these problems persist, enlist your child into your local mental health center.


Thank you....
Mon 19/07/04 at 16:30
Regular
Posts: 640
Well I`m happy now!! :oD

So zxv are you gothic?
Mon 19/07/04 at 16:42
Regular
"Monochromatic"
Posts: 18,487
29
Flockhart am Winnar................ or Loser
Yay !
No boooo !
Oh i'm confused now :s
Mon 19/07/04 at 17:18
Regular
Posts: 20,776
All goths should be crushed into a cubes and served to bovines, along with those other weirdos pagans.... no .... satanist..... no .... obsessive fundamental christians .... yeah.
Mon 19/07/04 at 17:25
Regular
"Monochromatic"
Posts: 18,487
These people aren't bloody gothic, i can't be bothered to explain it, it's not some leather wearing, devil worshipping, sex club, most of these people aren't goths !
Mon 19/07/04 at 18:38
Regular
Posts: 640
I`m Christian but I`m still interested in devil stuff etc
Mon 19/07/04 at 18:55
"period drama"
Posts: 19,792
This is pure genius. What a wonderful topic.

-Shows a declining interest in wholesome activities, such as: the Bible, prayer, church or sports

God bless 1923, eh?

-Is homosexual and/or bisexual.

Is it actually possible to be homosexual and bisexual. Methinksnot. And believe me, I've tried.

For the record: no-one cares.
Joy!
Mon 19/07/04 at 18:57
"period drama"
Posts: 19,792
-Complains of boredom.

Because the Lord is so stimulating?
Not too stimulating, mind - let's not get carried away.
Mon 19/07/04 at 19:31
Regular
"tokyo police club"
Posts: 12,540
I'm sure this was meant to be tongue in cheek.

I am certain of it.
Mon 19/07/04 at 19:34
"period drama"
Posts: 19,792
I tried to be sure it was.
It would seem that way.

But somehow I think not ...
Mon 19/07/04 at 19:37
Regular
"tokyo police club"
Posts: 12,540
The Topic title 'Is your child a Goth?'

Your child claims to be:
- a goth.

That was just randomly paraphrased, but that's what clinched it, for me, and made me certain that it was, in fact, a joke.

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