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"Bullying"

Well what can i say? I think bullying is something that we've all experienced at one point in our lives. Either by being a victim or being the bully. I think that many places, schools in particular, are overlooking this problem. I know that in basically every school in the world there are bullying incidents. Whether it being verbal or physical, there is always somebody that gets hurt. A lot of teachers in schools try to ignore the fact that this happens because they dont want to be recognised as a place where this happens; when in fact it is a very common thing.

I cant say that i know how you feel because i myself have never experienced it. I have a lot of friends that have been bullied and i've tried to help them cope. On the otherhand i know that you will be feeling afraid and as though you cant tell anybody. Talking to somebody in confidence can really help, i know that it might be hard but you will feel better if you do.

Another thing to remember is dont fight back. Thats what they want you to do. One of the hardest things is to walk away and ignore them but it will make you the stronger one. If you answer back, they will know that they have succeeded. The same goes for if they physically hurt you. Dont throw another punch if even if they done it to you first. You will get into as much trouble for something that is not your fault.

Normally, people bully because it is a way of letting go. Usually if something is happening at home or even if they are confused. More likely is to gain attention in order to become popular. It is a known fact that most people that resort to bullying have been bullied themselves at one point.

There are numbers you can call and talk to people. NEVER LET THEM GET AWAY WITH IT!

Speaking to someone is always a good idea because it a release for all the built up frustration which they are feeling. Bottling it up just withdraws you from others.

TheBigScot, i agree completely with what you've said.

In a way, i'm also glad i got bullied as i learnt things about myself and i beleive i made me stronger as a person and i'm proud that i managed to deal with it myself.

However, will stress again to any people who are reading this that may be being bullied:

If you can't sort it out yourself, go and speak to someone about it. Don't bottle it up.

'Gameaday'

I was bullied at school for years. Nothing major, and only from a few people, but it still got me down. I was bullied due to my weight (I'm not obese, but anyone can see that I have a rather plump belly), and it just left me feeling like someone who no one wanted to know. I never retaliated, and ignored the taunts as much as I could, but I was never happy.
It is only really in the last year that I have come to realise that I am fat, so why do I care that certain people remind me of it? What it all comes down to is: calling someone fat is only nasty if the person doesn’t like being fat. In fact I am now very fond of my belly, and am not shy about it at all. When I became enlightened of this I changed my attitude to the people who made fun of me. When they said some fat joke or tried to be nasty, I just laughed with them, and light heartedly acknowledged the fact that I am overweight.

“For if we cannot laugh at ourselves, what gives us the right to laugh at others?”

From this point I started feeling better about myself, content with life, and accepted more by people. It is only recently that I have discovered that I was cutting myself off from situations where I would meet new people, not that they didn’t want to get to know me. I get on well with just about everyone I meet now.
I know everyone’s experiences with bullying is different, but what I think you should think about is, for example, do I actually mind being fat, or being bald, or small or whatever you are being bullied about. Because as I said earlier, something said about you is only nasty if that is something you don’t like about yourself, or something you want to change in yourself. The best way to diffuse a situation is to be proud of who you are, then no amount of verbal taunts can harm you.
This is just a starting point really, where anyone goes from here is his or her own choice, but strange as it sounds, I’m glad I was bullied. It has shown me how strong a person I really am for getting over it without letting the bullying get me into any depressions are anything of that sort; I was just unhappy at times. The best part of it is that I have gone from being a little fat kid who was picked on, with only a few friends, to someone who is respected by everyone who knows me, and that quite a few people now!

I used to be bullied at school as well. Nothing physical, but it was verbal. I told some of the teachers but they didn't seem to really do much.

So i sorted it out myself. When i say this i dont mean i went and beat 7 bells out of them, but i found my own way of doing it. I turned the joke around. It took a while, but i was soon able to speed up my replies and increas the wit of what i was saying.

I didn't get rude, i merely made the person who was bullying me laugh. I learnt to laugh at myself, at the flaws i had, after all no one is perfect, but i also managed to increase me strengths.

It all changed when i started college 4 years ago. My sense of humour had improved and i was the one people looked up to. I didnt become a bully, but i knew how to make people laugh.

All in all i'm glad i dealt with it how i did as it made me a stronger person and i improved as a person.

However i wouldnt say to everyone "sort it out yourself" as all cases are different. I would suggest to try and sort it out yourself initially, as if you can work it out, you feel a lot better and learn things about yourself at the same time.

However, if you cant sort it out yourself relatively quickly, talk to someone! Dont keep it to yourself!

And as Goatboy says, as soon as you leave school it all changes, believe me!

Absolutely steller advice in that last post there.
All I can is repeat myself:

If you are in this situation, it isn't your fault. Please, dont think you're a bad person, or there's something wrong with you, because there isn't.

And it won't last forever, don't think it's not worth going on. I've been there when I was at school, you hate going in every day,you lay awake at night with knots in your stomach dreading what will come.
But it will stop, you must try to not let it get to you, and you can tell people.

Be it a parent or a teacher you like, failing that, tell the headmaster. Please, I know it feels like nobody will listen or care, but they do.

And if anyone is reading this and are a bully themselves?
You may think you're tough and "The Man" because you rule your year, but wait till you get out into the world.
It doesn't matter how big you are for your age, nobody cares that you can threaten and intimidate.
You try that crap out there and see how far you get.
There is always someone bigger than you, and outside of school? There's no threat of expulsion or detention, you WILL meet someone that can take you down in a second.

And, just a plea to everyone else, if you see this going on in the street or on a bus, get involved.
Don't bury your face in a paper and think "Kids eh?".
Get in there and stop it, trust me, the kid that is getting bullied will be so grateful to you.

Since I'm no longer a little scared schoolkid, I make it a point to get involved when I see this going on.
There is nothing better than pulling a kid down to size that thinks they're tough and mean to someone smaller.

So, bullies, you carry on like this and you'll fall down outside of school.

And please, try that crap with me, you may think you're tough but you're a little boy.

Sorry, I know that may make me sound just as bad, but if a kid thinks he's tough for picking on someone smaller, you're welcome to see how far that gets you when you're not with your little gang of cronies.

I have never experienced bullying before, but that doesn’t mean to say that it can’t happen tomorrow so I take this matter very seriously. Thinking about it I suppose I have been bullied a little. This was a while back, maybe a year ago. This was getting mugged by a kid who was about three years older than I was. I can remember it clearly. My second day of Secondary School and I was walking home from school when this kid come up to me. He asked me to empty out my pockets, and as I refused he punched me in the face. I didn’t keep it a secret though, as I was crying all the way home. When my mum found out, I think it affected her more than me. She went mad, just at the at the thought that I was minding my own business and not harming anyone then all of a sudden someone tried to mug me. This is really minor compared to the real bullying that goes on.

Being bullied is a lonely time and you might think you haven’t got any friends. You’re probably not the only one being bullied who has to spend break and lunch hour on your own. Keep your eyes open. If you see someone else on their own try to start a conversation, about anything, schoolwork, if you think you know their sister, if you think they might live near you, anything at all. Sooner or later you’ll find a genuine friend who likes you for yourself. Sometimes bullies will take your friends off you, perhaps your friends are afraid they’ll also be bullied if they go around with you. It’s always very upsetting when friends turn against you which is a good reason to try to get on with as many different people as you can, even those in different years.

Bullying happens everywhere, not just school. I think the place where bullying can occur most is on the way home from school. On the school bus, try to sit near the driver, or if it’s the ordinary bus, by other adults. If you have to walk part of the way, and you’re afraid of being ambushed, then vary your route, try to leave home and school a bit later or a bit earlier, or see if you can walk with other people who live near you, even if they’re older or younger.

Just remember that you do not have a problem, the bully has.

I agree, well done. I'm glad this won, otherwise I would have never seen the topic.

It is a sensitive subject and the problem is that many of the cases of bullying are started for different reasons, none that are the fault of the victim. This means that there is not one set way of dealing with it, and it can make the person being bullied more introverted and affect their school work and even their life later on.

I know it took me a long time to get over it when I was bullied at school, but what helped me was that I wasn't the only one in the situation. It made the bullying less personal, just a bunch of guys picking on someone smaller than them. At one point I didn't even want to go to school and used to pretend to be ill (I even got quite good at faking illness)

I've forgiven the people who did it because I don't think they realised quite what an affect bullying had on the people they were victimising, but it took a long time and affected my life for quite a while afterwards. I've since got my courage back and I think part of that was in looking back at the situation and telling myself that it's all in the past. It does annoy me still when I hear it happening to other people though.

Congratulations to Cooldogs - a deserving prize winner. Well done also to Happy for raising the subject in the first place.

Well done cooldogs. Bullying is a difficult subject and you handled it with the dignity and respect it deserves.

Yep, respect to you all.