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"Gaming University of Special Reserve"

Welcome to the Gaming University of Special Reserve

Here at the GUSR we specialise in learning more about games to make your life easier. Let me introduce a few of our lecturers to you as we walk around the University grounds.

Here, in the Games Lab, is Prof. Sheepy. His current study into the number of exclamation marks in game packaging is very important to the industry and helps in the formation of new game cover designs.

“Ah, yes. As you can see from the findings, exclamation marks play a big part in whether people will take a game seriously or not. Take Halo, a very serious game with no time for mucking about. A single exclamation mark in the description and we could be looking at a case of comedy, 3 and it would turn into a parody. F-Zero GX, however is an ‘extreme’ game and this requires at least one large exclamation mark. Do you know, I get paid 15 grand for this? Brilliant!”

Er, yes, thank you Prof. Sheepy.

Next we have our lecturer Afrojoe, head of colour studies.

“See this. It’s the green Xbox case. It means business, but is a little bit strange too. That’s what Microsoft want you to think, a little bit X-files. Pity it’s 3 years too late for that, but there you go. Colours run deeper than that though, Gran Turismo 3 uses lovely sun effects to capture those sunny funny cars, while Resident Evil runs red with blood, mmmm, blood, lots of lovely red claret flowing everywhere, mmmmm, blood, blood, blood…”

Ok. Swiftly moving on then, we have English_Bloke, who is working on whether handheld gaming gives you a better chance with the opposite sex, ah, but he seems to be a little pre-occupied…Grand Master Paradox, who is currently looking at porno mag…ah, he’s not actually doing any research at present, and Grix, who no-one can figure out why he’s actually here, they just haven’t ever agreed on who wanted to ask him to leave.

Lastly, we come to Master MoJoJoJo, who explains why CDs and DVDs are round.

“Look, man, those CDs are totally round. If they were square, they’d be, like, totally square man. They just wouldn’t twist the way they do. It’s a circular thing, baby.”

Join us next week when we introduce you to Meka Dragon, the man who wrote the thesis on the connections between Mary Kate and Ashley games and Vice City, and Lindgren will take you through the ideas behind games beginning with T and their sequel power.

I hope you’ve enjoyed your visit.

Prof. PB, Lecturer, GUSR

"“Look, man, those CDs are totally round. If they were square, they’d be, like, totally square man. They just wouldn’t twist the way they do. It’s a circular thing, baby.”"

I don't think I've ever called anyone "baby"... but I approve of this post. Have a goldfish.

CDs twist?

'You take control of an old woman, as she struggles to get to teh toilet. Furiously press the a button to make her supress teh urin'

GAD Winner 24/03/03

mattributé wrote:
> Back in the days of GAD1...
>
> Para (kyz22 at the time, of course) would've made a crap post
> parodying a game and beat you

Ahaha, I remember this.

"Grandparents: the game"

"School: The game"

Etc etc

I think I'd make a marvellous professor. But no, I've not the foggiest what I'd teach. I'd just make up the lesson as I went along, excellent.

Good work Pb.

Heh, Good.

Where's my 15 grand?

I wouldn't want to embarrass anyone.

FinalFantasyFanatic wrote:
> And I would have written an amazingly homosexual story and be largely
> ignored.

i thought that people were suposed to heavily involve themselves in their own sexual fantasies.

Nice one pb.

And I would have written an amazingly homosexual story and be largely ignored.