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Chapter 1
Stephanie Alexandria Smith was a normal girl. She was twelve years of age and loved boys, dolls and girly magazines. She had a great family who loved her and she had wonderful friends. She attended Flitburn High School in Aberdeen, Scotland. She was very clever and extremely popular. But little did she know that one day her world was about to be changed completely.
The high school bell rang, signalling the end of the day. ‘I couldn’t stand one more minute of History, could you Louise?’, asked Stephanie. Louise replied, ‘No, I hate History, do you want to walk home with me again?’ 'Okay', Stephanie said. They got out of the school grounds and trudged towards the traffic lights. They suddenly turned green and Stephanie and Louise sprinted towards the road. They made it across but then something that was going to change Stephenie’s life forever happened. They turned around and to their horror, two cars had just crashed into each other. A blue Ford Ka and a green Vauxhall Astra. They screamed and ran over to the cars. One of the drivers got out of their car and walked over towards the other car. The other man didn’t get out of the car. The crash had been particularly gruesome as one of the cars (the Ford Ka) had stopped and all of a sudden a car came flying around the corner and smashed into it. Stephanie walked over to the mangled car and peered inside. To her horror she was staring into the eyes of her father.
She screeched and tears came flooding into her eyes. She opened the broken door and grabbed hold of her dad. She cuddled him and noticed that his body was stained with blood. She was about to pull him out when her friend, Louise shouted, ‘Don’t do that, you might break his back!’ Stephanie hugged her dad and kept crying. Meanwhile, everyone in the street was flooding around that smashed up car. ‘Daddy, say something’, Stephanie uttered through her tears. Her dad never replied. She shook her father’s body. ‘NOOOOOOOOOO!’ she screamed, crying and shouting. ‘I’ll call an ambulance’ said someone in the crowd. ‘Daddy, I love you, please wake up’, sobbed Stephanie. She was very close to her father, Neil. His birthday was next week and Stephanie was planning on getting him something brilliant for his big 40. She cried into his jacket for several minutes while screaming things like ‘Why, God, why!?’ Her crying was interrupted by a loud noise from far away. It was getting louder and louder and louder. It was the ambulance. Stephanie got out of the car and stood up, still crying. She stood out of the way and out jumped the paramedics. They picked up Neil Smith and put him on a stretcher. They asked some of the people what happened but none of them could give them straight answers. Stephenie watched as the man who crashed his car spoke to the paramedics. She did not listen, instead she kneeled down and cuddled her father. She then kissed him on the forehead and stood up. They paramedics lifted him up on the stretcher and put him into the ambulance. She heard one of the paramedics say ‘This doesn’t look good’ before they drove off. Stephanie stood there and burst out into tears again.
Seconds later, her mother, Janice arrived at the scene. Janice got out of her car and ran up to Stephanie and hugged her. ‘I love you’ ,she said. ‘How did you find out?’, asked Stephanie, still crying heavily. ‘Your friend, Louise, phoned me.’ Stephanie turned round but Louise had gone. Where had she gone? She was there a few minutes ago. Janice said,‘C’mon let’s go up to the hospital’ Stephanie nodded and got into the car. They drove off to the hospital, which was a few miles away. During the journey all sorts of thoughts were going through her head. Was her father dead? Where did Louise go? Why wasn’t her mother even sad?
Chapter 2 coming soon.
Stephanie Alexandria Smith was a normal girl. She was twelve years of age and loved boys, dolls and girly magazines. She had a great family who loved her and she had wonderful friends. She attended Flitburn High School in Aberdeen, Scotland. She was very clever and extremely popular. But little did she know that one day her world was about to be changed completely.
The high school bell rang, signalling the end of the day. ‘I couldn’t stand one more minute of History, could you Louise?’, asked Stephanie. Louise replied, ‘No, I hate History, do you want to walk home with me again?’ 'Okay', Stephanie said. They got out of the school grounds and trudged towards the traffic lights. They suddenly turned green and Stephanie and Louise sprinted towards the road. They made it across but then something that was going to change Stephenie’s life forever happened. They turned around and to their horror, two cars had just crashed into each other. A blue Ford Ka and a green Vauxhall Astra. They screamed and ran over to the cars. One of the drivers got out of their car and walked over towards the other car. The other man didn’t get out of the car. The crash had been particularly gruesome as one of the cars (the Ford Ka) had stopped and all of a sudden a car came flying around the corner and smashed into it. Stephanie walked over to the mangled car and peered inside. To her horror she was staring into the eyes of her father.
She screeched and tears came flooding into her eyes. She opened the broken door and grabbed hold of her dad. She cuddled him and noticed that his body was stained with blood. She was about to pull him out when her friend, Louise shouted, ‘Don’t do that, you might break his back!’ Stephanie hugged her dad and kept crying. Meanwhile, everyone in the street was flooding around that smashed up car. ‘Daddy, say something’, Stephanie uttered through her tears. Her dad never replied. She shook her father’s body. ‘NOOOOOOOOOO!’ she screamed, crying and shouting. ‘I’ll call an ambulance’ said someone in the crowd. ‘Daddy, I love you, please wake up’, sobbed Stephanie. She was very close to her father, Neil. His birthday was next week and Stephanie was planning on getting him something brilliant for his big 40. She cried into his jacket for several minutes while screaming things like ‘Why, God, why!?’ Her crying was interrupted by a loud noise from far away. It was getting louder and louder and louder. It was the ambulance. Stephanie got out of the car and stood up, still crying. She stood out of the way and out jumped the paramedics. They picked up Neil Smith and put him on a stretcher. They asked some of the people what happened but none of them could give them straight answers. Stephenie watched as the man who crashed his car spoke to the paramedics. She did not listen, instead she kneeled down and cuddled her father. She then kissed him on the forehead and stood up. They paramedics lifted him up on the stretcher and put him into the ambulance. She heard one of the paramedics say ‘This doesn’t look good’ before they drove off. Stephanie stood there and burst out into tears again.
Seconds later, her mother, Janice arrived at the scene. Janice got out of her car and ran up to Stephanie and hugged her. ‘I love you’ ,she said. ‘How did you find out?’, asked Stephanie, still crying heavily. ‘Your friend, Louise, phoned me.’ Stephanie turned round but Louise had gone. Where had she gone? She was there a few minutes ago. Janice said,‘C’mon let’s go up to the hospital’ Stephanie nodded and got into the car. They drove off to the hospital, which was a few miles away. During the journey all sorts of thoughts were going through her head. Was her father dead? Where did Louise go? Why wasn’t her mother even sad?
Chapter 2 coming soon.
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Wakka, trust me, there are many other ways to insult you.
That was just funny.
That was just funny.
Mav wrote:
> Wakka wrote:
> They got out of the school grounds and trudged towards the traffic
> lights. They suddenly turned green.
>
> I found this twist in the story particularly interesting.
>
> It's not often that you see somebody's skin change spontaneously.
You could find nothing else to insult me with so you chose something that you made sound wrong. Why?
> Wakka wrote:
> They got out of the school grounds and trudged towards the traffic
> lights. They suddenly turned green.
>
> I found this twist in the story particularly interesting.
>
> It's not often that you see somebody's skin change spontaneously.
You could find nothing else to insult me with so you chose something that you made sound wrong. Why?
I can just see the bad actors and wobbly sets now.
A perfect encapsulation of a very, very bad 80's soap.
A perfect encapsulation of a very, very bad 80's soap.
...They drove off to the hospital, which was a few miles away. During the journey all sorts of thoughts were going through her head. Was her father dead? Where did Louise go? Why wasn’t her mother even sad?
Chapter 2
It turns out, her father was not dead, but he had run away to Germany so that he could live as a cuccoon fetishist in Dresden. Louise, it turns out, was not Louise at all, but in fact she was a small dog/swan hybrid. Because of this, she was nature's mistake, and she died, and lived, in utter, utter agony.
Her mother was not sad because her mother was a robot.
Fin.
By Wakka
Chapter 2
It turns out, her father was not dead, but he had run away to Germany so that he could live as a cuccoon fetishist in Dresden. Louise, it turns out, was not Louise at all, but in fact she was a small dog/swan hybrid. Because of this, she was nature's mistake, and she died, and lived, in utter, utter agony.
Her mother was not sad because her mother was a robot.
Fin.
By Wakka
Wakka, promise me you won't attempt story-writing ever again.
Wakka wrote:
> They got out of the school grounds and trudged towards the traffic
> lights. They suddenly turned green.
I found this twist in the story particularly interesting.
It's not often that you see somebody's skin change spontaneously.
> They got out of the school grounds and trudged towards the traffic
> lights. They suddenly turned green.
I found this twist in the story particularly interesting.
It's not often that you see somebody's skin change spontaneously.
After having skim read it before, I've now read it through properly.
It's quite simply one of the funniest things I've ever read.
The time savers are a real work of genius. "She held her dad and screamed some things like "Why God Why?!"".
Superb. Why bother with structured dialogue to convey a feeling when you can skip time and use examples?
It's quite simply one of the funniest things I've ever read.
The time savers are a real work of genius. "She held her dad and screamed some things like "Why God Why?!"".
Superb. Why bother with structured dialogue to convey a feeling when you can skip time and use examples?
The descriptive detailing was extremely intricate, with some wonderful word choice and inventive metaphors.
Amazing, truely inspired story telling.
I love the way her friend tells her not move her dad because of spinal injury, then she goes on to hug him and violently shake him shouting "nooooooooo".
*wipes tears from eyes* You really do know how to express emotions and set the scene through your writing Wakka, amazing stuff.
I love the way her friend tells her not move her dad because of spinal injury, then she goes on to hug him and violently shake him shouting "nooooooooo".
*wipes tears from eyes* You really do know how to express emotions and set the scene through your writing Wakka, amazing stuff.
That was rather articulate for you, Wakka.
;)
;)
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