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To save you the effort, I've done a quick capsule review of the films I've watched lately.
Don't say I didn't warn you when you rent 'em:
Rabbit Proof Fence
True story of Aboriginal children taken from their families and placed with white families for a better life. Film shows the efforts of 3 little girls to be reunited with their mother after escaping their "orphanage".
Wellllllll...it's honourable in intention and highlights a tragic and wrong period of history....but it's an ass-boring film. Weighed down with it's own "Look! Look at the wrongness here! It's wrong! So wrong!" that eventually you want to see one of the girls get snatched by a dingo or mauled by a croc, just for something to happen that isn't artful shots of grubby kids being upset and wan.
Max
A story about a Jewish art-dealer that encounters a young Hitler and encourages his art but is slightly perturbed by his slightly odd beliefs.
It's another film that you kinda feel bad for knocking because of the inherent nobility of dealing with true-life tragedy. But let's be honest, it reeked.
It was John Cusack saying "You need to access your anger, unleash your pain to be an artist" and Young Shine being all "No! I am going to write about politics and I don't like Jews and this is all a portent of what is to come".
Nothing happened. Nothing. They talked for 90 mins, then some sailors kick one-armed John Cusack to death and Hitler disappears. I was looking at the special features hoping they'd put the interesting bits in another section.
Intolerable Cruelty
The Coen Bros adapt somebody else's screenplay for a change.
But it's still 100% Coen gold. Even Catherine "I'm Welsh, me!" Zeta-Jones can't derail it, and Clooney proves his best work has been with The Coens.
It has everything that is good about their movies, and the characters are, as usual, perfect pitched.
Whether it's the private investigator hired at the start "Whoooooaaaa, ah'm a gonna nail that ass! I'm an ass nailer!" or Jeffrey Rush being stabbed in the butt with his award at the start - an absolute joy to watch.
Quite when The Coens will make a bad movie is beyond me, and I'm kind of dreading the day because so far their track record has been impeccable.
Hell, this one even has the demon-biker from Raising Arizona in, except this time he's an asthmatic hitman.
Tears of The Sun
Bruce Willis in a "We're soldiers but dammit we have a heart" movie, the typical pre/post war crap we're given to digest and feel better about ourselves.
Bruce sweats and grimaces and feels the pain of the natives etc etc - mainly to score with Monica Bellucci, so that's forgiveable because I'd do the same. And has Ms Bellucci sweaty and in short shorts, sometimes grubby.
It's alright if you ignore the crass "Hey, brown-people are human too" moral coda of this explosions-fest. Tom Skerrit stands about on aircraft carriers being gruff and The Man-but-deep-down-good character and a bunch of hut-hut types play the soldiers (and Cole Hauser).
Cabin Fever
B-movie horror about nubile kids in the woods being infected by something we're never told. Imagine a cross between The Thing/Beverley Hills 90210 and Mystery Science Theatre 3000.
Idiotic plot holes, a pointless character that turns up simply to...er...smoke dope and walk off again? (Never got that character).
It's alright in a mindless genre pic with a jump-moment every 15 mins and the typically predictable unpredictable ending. Also has boobs and a guy having, I presume, a finger shoved up his ass in mid-coitus. Which was nice. Needed zombie bears to be a truly excellent B-movie though
--------
So there you go. Make of it what you will.
Don't say I didn't warn you when you rent 'em:
Rabbit Proof Fence
True story of Aboriginal children taken from their families and placed with white families for a better life. Film shows the efforts of 3 little girls to be reunited with their mother after escaping their "orphanage".
Wellllllll...it's honourable in intention and highlights a tragic and wrong period of history....but it's an ass-boring film. Weighed down with it's own "Look! Look at the wrongness here! It's wrong! So wrong!" that eventually you want to see one of the girls get snatched by a dingo or mauled by a croc, just for something to happen that isn't artful shots of grubby kids being upset and wan.
Max
A story about a Jewish art-dealer that encounters a young Hitler and encourages his art but is slightly perturbed by his slightly odd beliefs.
It's another film that you kinda feel bad for knocking because of the inherent nobility of dealing with true-life tragedy. But let's be honest, it reeked.
It was John Cusack saying "You need to access your anger, unleash your pain to be an artist" and Young Shine being all "No! I am going to write about politics and I don't like Jews and this is all a portent of what is to come".
Nothing happened. Nothing. They talked for 90 mins, then some sailors kick one-armed John Cusack to death and Hitler disappears. I was looking at the special features hoping they'd put the interesting bits in another section.
Intolerable Cruelty
The Coen Bros adapt somebody else's screenplay for a change.
But it's still 100% Coen gold. Even Catherine "I'm Welsh, me!" Zeta-Jones can't derail it, and Clooney proves his best work has been with The Coens.
It has everything that is good about their movies, and the characters are, as usual, perfect pitched.
Whether it's the private investigator hired at the start "Whoooooaaaa, ah'm a gonna nail that ass! I'm an ass nailer!" or Jeffrey Rush being stabbed in the butt with his award at the start - an absolute joy to watch.
Quite when The Coens will make a bad movie is beyond me, and I'm kind of dreading the day because so far their track record has been impeccable.
Hell, this one even has the demon-biker from Raising Arizona in, except this time he's an asthmatic hitman.
Tears of The Sun
Bruce Willis in a "We're soldiers but dammit we have a heart" movie, the typical pre/post war crap we're given to digest and feel better about ourselves.
Bruce sweats and grimaces and feels the pain of the natives etc etc - mainly to score with Monica Bellucci, so that's forgiveable because I'd do the same. And has Ms Bellucci sweaty and in short shorts, sometimes grubby.
It's alright if you ignore the crass "Hey, brown-people are human too" moral coda of this explosions-fest. Tom Skerrit stands about on aircraft carriers being gruff and The Man-but-deep-down-good character and a bunch of hut-hut types play the soldiers (and Cole Hauser).
Cabin Fever
B-movie horror about nubile kids in the woods being infected by something we're never told. Imagine a cross between The Thing/Beverley Hills 90210 and Mystery Science Theatre 3000.
Idiotic plot holes, a pointless character that turns up simply to...er...smoke dope and walk off again? (Never got that character).
It's alright in a mindless genre pic with a jump-moment every 15 mins and the typically predictable unpredictable ending. Also has boobs and a guy having, I presume, a finger shoved up his ass in mid-coitus. Which was nice. Needed zombie bears to be a truly excellent B-movie though
--------
So there you go. Make of it what you will.
There have been no replies to this thread yet.
To save you the effort, I've done a quick capsule review of the films I've watched lately.
Don't say I didn't warn you when you rent 'em:
Rabbit Proof Fence
True story of Aboriginal children taken from their families and placed with white families for a better life. Film shows the efforts of 3 little girls to be reunited with their mother after escaping their "orphanage".
Wellllllll...it's honourable in intention and highlights a tragic and wrong period of history....but it's an ass-boring film. Weighed down with it's own "Look! Look at the wrongness here! It's wrong! So wrong!" that eventually you want to see one of the girls get snatched by a dingo or mauled by a croc, just for something to happen that isn't artful shots of grubby kids being upset and wan.
Max
A story about a Jewish art-dealer that encounters a young Hitler and encourages his art but is slightly perturbed by his slightly odd beliefs.
It's another film that you kinda feel bad for knocking because of the inherent nobility of dealing with true-life tragedy. But let's be honest, it reeked.
It was John Cusack saying "You need to access your anger, unleash your pain to be an artist" and Young Shine being all "No! I am going to write about politics and I don't like Jews and this is all a portent of what is to come".
Nothing happened. Nothing. They talked for 90 mins, then some sailors kick one-armed John Cusack to death and Hitler disappears. I was looking at the special features hoping they'd put the interesting bits in another section.
Intolerable Cruelty
The Coen Bros adapt somebody else's screenplay for a change.
But it's still 100% Coen gold. Even Catherine "I'm Welsh, me!" Zeta-Jones can't derail it, and Clooney proves his best work has been with The Coens.
It has everything that is good about their movies, and the characters are, as usual, perfect pitched.
Whether it's the private investigator hired at the start "Whoooooaaaa, ah'm a gonna nail that ass! I'm an ass nailer!" or Jeffrey Rush being stabbed in the butt with his award at the start - an absolute joy to watch.
Quite when The Coens will make a bad movie is beyond me, and I'm kind of dreading the day because so far their track record has been impeccable.
Hell, this one even has the demon-biker from Raising Arizona in, except this time he's an asthmatic hitman.
Tears of The Sun
Bruce Willis in a "We're soldiers but dammit we have a heart" movie, the typical pre/post war crap we're given to digest and feel better about ourselves.
Bruce sweats and grimaces and feels the pain of the natives etc etc - mainly to score with Monica Bellucci, so that's forgiveable because I'd do the same. And has Ms Bellucci sweaty and in short shorts, sometimes grubby.
It's alright if you ignore the crass "Hey, brown-people are human too" moral coda of this explosions-fest. Tom Skerrit stands about on aircraft carriers being gruff and The Man-but-deep-down-good character and a bunch of hut-hut types play the soldiers (and Cole Hauser).
Cabin Fever
B-movie horror about nubile kids in the woods being infected by something we're never told. Imagine a cross between The Thing/Beverley Hills 90210 and Mystery Science Theatre 3000.
Idiotic plot holes, a pointless character that turns up simply to...er...smoke dope and walk off again? (Never got that character).
It's alright in a mindless genre pic with a jump-moment every 15 mins and the typically predictable unpredictable ending. Also has boobs and a guy having, I presume, a finger shoved up his ass in mid-coitus. Which was nice. Needed zombie bears to be a truly excellent B-movie though
--------
So there you go. Make of it what you will.
Don't say I didn't warn you when you rent 'em:
Rabbit Proof Fence
True story of Aboriginal children taken from their families and placed with white families for a better life. Film shows the efforts of 3 little girls to be reunited with their mother after escaping their "orphanage".
Wellllllll...it's honourable in intention and highlights a tragic and wrong period of history....but it's an ass-boring film. Weighed down with it's own "Look! Look at the wrongness here! It's wrong! So wrong!" that eventually you want to see one of the girls get snatched by a dingo or mauled by a croc, just for something to happen that isn't artful shots of grubby kids being upset and wan.
Max
A story about a Jewish art-dealer that encounters a young Hitler and encourages his art but is slightly perturbed by his slightly odd beliefs.
It's another film that you kinda feel bad for knocking because of the inherent nobility of dealing with true-life tragedy. But let's be honest, it reeked.
It was John Cusack saying "You need to access your anger, unleash your pain to be an artist" and Young Shine being all "No! I am going to write about politics and I don't like Jews and this is all a portent of what is to come".
Nothing happened. Nothing. They talked for 90 mins, then some sailors kick one-armed John Cusack to death and Hitler disappears. I was looking at the special features hoping they'd put the interesting bits in another section.
Intolerable Cruelty
The Coen Bros adapt somebody else's screenplay for a change.
But it's still 100% Coen gold. Even Catherine "I'm Welsh, me!" Zeta-Jones can't derail it, and Clooney proves his best work has been with The Coens.
It has everything that is good about their movies, and the characters are, as usual, perfect pitched.
Whether it's the private investigator hired at the start "Whoooooaaaa, ah'm a gonna nail that ass! I'm an ass nailer!" or Jeffrey Rush being stabbed in the butt with his award at the start - an absolute joy to watch.
Quite when The Coens will make a bad movie is beyond me, and I'm kind of dreading the day because so far their track record has been impeccable.
Hell, this one even has the demon-biker from Raising Arizona in, except this time he's an asthmatic hitman.
Tears of The Sun
Bruce Willis in a "We're soldiers but dammit we have a heart" movie, the typical pre/post war crap we're given to digest and feel better about ourselves.
Bruce sweats and grimaces and feels the pain of the natives etc etc - mainly to score with Monica Bellucci, so that's forgiveable because I'd do the same. And has Ms Bellucci sweaty and in short shorts, sometimes grubby.
It's alright if you ignore the crass "Hey, brown-people are human too" moral coda of this explosions-fest. Tom Skerrit stands about on aircraft carriers being gruff and The Man-but-deep-down-good character and a bunch of hut-hut types play the soldiers (and Cole Hauser).
Cabin Fever
B-movie horror about nubile kids in the woods being infected by something we're never told. Imagine a cross between The Thing/Beverley Hills 90210 and Mystery Science Theatre 3000.
Idiotic plot holes, a pointless character that turns up simply to...er...smoke dope and walk off again? (Never got that character).
It's alright in a mindless genre pic with a jump-moment every 15 mins and the typically predictable unpredictable ending. Also has boobs and a guy having, I presume, a finger shoved up his ass in mid-coitus. Which was nice. Needed zombie bears to be a truly excellent B-movie though
--------
So there you go. Make of it what you will.