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In 2004 just one week ago Garden Sheers Gary had stumbled on a secret so bad that he had his balls chopped of so that his voice was so high he could not speak to anyone without popping there ear drums. No really scientists had to use what they call using a physical object and using the power of you body part to use it as a projectile to place onto a higher part of the body (UPOAUTPOYBPTUIAPTPOHPOTB) or what we call “putting some ear things on” but anyway Gary had then told them the shocking truth.
You are about to read about a gruesome act of violence towards animals and some may want to stop reading the next paragraph because it may make you throw up or cry.
At sharp branch farm the wailing squeals from innocent pigs were being heard and Gary went to check it out after some days he had plucked up the courage to go and seek out what the cause of the innocent piglet squeals were as he approached the barn he had tripped over a branch that was rather sharp Gary thought that it was no ordinary branch and approached the barn with more caution. As he got closer the wails of piglets were getting closer and Gary was hiding in a bush about 3 metres away from the door, All was well until he made a break for it only to find that a squad of highly trained guards surrounded and captured him. Gary gave up almost immediately,
Who would go up against a squad of armed trained elite soldiers employed by TWIGLETS?!?!
Gary was confused so confused that his head hurt and then it hit him.
Gary got knocked out by one of the guards only to find that he was strapped to a chair forced to face the sight of a sweaty man that looked like the chief of security with greasy hands and a half eaten Big Mac on the table next to him. Gary thought it was the chief of security but he did not understand the initials of the jacket he was wearing EB was on each side of the jacket and it had just looked like he had just got of the toilet with JUGS (Juiced up girls) magazine.
“I heard you were hanging outside the barn tonight,”
“You heard right,”
Gary had replied with a witty remark not aware of the rifle under the guards coat, The guard then pushed the nozzle into the eyes of Gary and he loaded the gun.
“You gonna talk smart now?,”
Gary was still going to mock the guard because there was nothing good to say about him.
“Maybe obviously you don’t I mean just got of the toilet with jugs? EB you sound like a man who wanted to be a police man but didn’t make it,”
“That’s it boys knock him out and get the garden sheers,”
Gary had a thought and yet again it hit him…
Gary woke up again this time in the woods his hands covered in blood he panicked and ran as fast as he could in a forward direction he ran to the nearest house. As he approached the door he couldn’t help but feel something was wrong apart from blood on his hands so he knocked on the door with caution when the man answered he realised that he knocked on the door but did not know what to say he was thirsty so he attempted to ask for a glass of water only to find that he blurted out some very high pitched nonsense as soon as this happened he dropped to the floor and fell asleep.
When Gary woke up he was laying in a hospital bed unable to move, His vision was blurry and all he could hear were doctors laughing but he didn’t know why all he could think about was why he was here and what was in that barn.
When he came to he was once again in the hospital bed only to see a doctor standing over him with a chart…
“What’s going on?,” asked Gary
“Well before you look down brace yourself and don’t be to shocked,” the doctor said
Gary looked down but what he saw no one could contemplate his middle mountain was completely removed and the words EB waz ere 04 were written where the mountain would have been. Gary screamed as loud as he could his voice was so high pitched it popped the doctors ear drums Gary’s pride and joy was removed and he leaked his story to the press.
A team of specially trained officers went to the barn and arrested the farmer and the guards employed by twiglets for animal cruelty.
You see in that barn in sharp branch farm there were trees with very sharp branches and many catapults from where piglets would be thrown onto these trees and chopped into tiny slivers where they would be made into twiglets.
You wont be seeing twiglets shortly but for the ones that still remain on the shelf think twice before buying or stealing them.
Credits
Chief security- English_Bloke
Other people- Guards from EBs police force.
You are about to read about a gruesome act of violence towards animals and some may want to stop reading the next paragraph because it may make you throw up or cry.
At sharp branch farm the wailing squeals from innocent pigs were being heard and Gary went to check it out after some days he had plucked up the courage to go and seek out what the cause of the innocent piglet squeals were as he approached the barn he had tripped over a branch that was rather sharp Gary thought that it was no ordinary branch and approached the barn with more caution. As he got closer the wails of piglets were getting closer and Gary was hiding in a bush about 3 metres away from the door, All was well until he made a break for it only to find that a squad of highly trained guards surrounded and captured him. Gary gave up almost immediately,
Who would go up against a squad of armed trained elite soldiers employed by TWIGLETS?!?!
Gary was confused so confused that his head hurt and then it hit him.
Gary got knocked out by one of the guards only to find that he was strapped to a chair forced to face the sight of a sweaty man that looked like the chief of security with greasy hands and a half eaten Big Mac on the table next to him. Gary thought it was the chief of security but he did not understand the initials of the jacket he was wearing EB was on each side of the jacket and it had just looked like he had just got of the toilet with JUGS (Juiced up girls) magazine.
“I heard you were hanging outside the barn tonight,”
“You heard right,”
Gary had replied with a witty remark not aware of the rifle under the guards coat, The guard then pushed the nozzle into the eyes of Gary and he loaded the gun.
“You gonna talk smart now?,”
Gary was still going to mock the guard because there was nothing good to say about him.
“Maybe obviously you don’t I mean just got of the toilet with jugs? EB you sound like a man who wanted to be a police man but didn’t make it,”
“That’s it boys knock him out and get the garden sheers,”
Gary had a thought and yet again it hit him…
Gary woke up again this time in the woods his hands covered in blood he panicked and ran as fast as he could in a forward direction he ran to the nearest house. As he approached the door he couldn’t help but feel something was wrong apart from blood on his hands so he knocked on the door with caution when the man answered he realised that he knocked on the door but did not know what to say he was thirsty so he attempted to ask for a glass of water only to find that he blurted out some very high pitched nonsense as soon as this happened he dropped to the floor and fell asleep.
When Gary woke up he was laying in a hospital bed unable to move, His vision was blurry and all he could hear were doctors laughing but he didn’t know why all he could think about was why he was here and what was in that barn.
When he came to he was once again in the hospital bed only to see a doctor standing over him with a chart…
“What’s going on?,” asked Gary
“Well before you look down brace yourself and don’t be to shocked,” the doctor said
Gary looked down but what he saw no one could contemplate his middle mountain was completely removed and the words EB waz ere 04 were written where the mountain would have been. Gary screamed as loud as he could his voice was so high pitched it popped the doctors ear drums Gary’s pride and joy was removed and he leaked his story to the press.
A team of specially trained officers went to the barn and arrested the farmer and the guards employed by twiglets for animal cruelty.
You see in that barn in sharp branch farm there were trees with very sharp branches and many catapults from where piglets would be thrown onto these trees and chopped into tiny slivers where they would be made into twiglets.
You wont be seeing twiglets shortly but for the ones that still remain on the shelf think twice before buying or stealing them.
Credits
Chief security- English_Bloke
Other people- Guards from EBs police force.
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Is that sarcasm? I can't tell in text, but I hope so.
Grey Fox wrote:
> Gary looked down but what he saw no one could contemplate his middle
> mountain was completely removed and the words EB waz ere 04 were
> written where the mountain would have been. Gary screamed as loud as
> he could his voice was so high pitched it popped the doctors ear
> drums Gary’s pride and joy was removed and he leaked his story to the
> press.
Grey Fox wrote:
> Gary looked down but what he saw no one could contemplate his middle
> mountain was completely removed and the words EB waz ere 04 were
> written where the mountain would have been. Gary screamed as loud as
> he could his voice was so high pitched it popped the doctors ear
> drums Gary’s pride and joy was removed and he leaked his story to the
> press.
No its a true story.
Just one question; was it supposed to be a comedy or not?
I don't get it.
And I get everything.
And I get everything.
I am the stupidist man on earth for saying that earmuffs was filtered when you typed it nash.
I used a space.
I used a space.
Yes filtered!
Did you read the story did you like it?
Did you read the story did you like it?
Grey Fox wrote:
> You are about to read about a gruesome act of violence towards
> animals and some may want to stop reading the next paragraph because
> it may make you throw up or cry.
I wept only at the way it was written.
> You are about to read about a gruesome act of violence towards
> animals and some may want to stop reading the next paragraph because
> it may make you throw up or cry.
I wept only at the way it was written.
Earmuffs?
Oh comments good and bad are welcome although im gonna wish I never said that.
With the ear things line it would be sffum (Read backwards) but its filtered.
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