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Console games haven’t been around that long in retrospect to how long computer games have been gracing the earth. Arcades used to be the only place you could play video games unless you were unhealthily rich and spoilt and had your own arcade game at home. Arcade games weren’t particularly expensive to play and you could finish a game by spending less that £40 like you have to do nowadays. You still can do this, in fact, as it costs around £1 per go on an arcade game and unless you’re lamer than a dead duck you should be able to finish a game in less than forty goes, thus saving you money! But gaming in your home has certain comforts such as been able to play at any time day or night, the privilege of been able to play in your underwear and scratch yourself, or allowing you to pause and return with some food or drink. So what if arcades were to come back big time and beat console games by getting people back into the arcades once again. Here are some methods they may like to try:
1 – Recreating home environment.
The arcade could perfectly design the average teenage gamers room. There would be an unmade bed a copy of playboy hidden under the mattress, a number of horror videos strewn across the floor and underwear dangling from lampshades. The console would be linked to a TV covered in biscuit crumbs and a VCR with a tape of ‘Channel 5’s post 10:50pm Friday night best bits’ resting inside. The gamer could choose from a variety of games, which they would have to find around the room hidden under dirty laundry, copied CD’s and games magazines. The gamer could then relax in the filthy room playing games charged by the hour and enjoy the homeliness of it all.
2 – Perverts Paradise
You all know that geeky kid at school who is obsessed with Lara Croft, the one who bought Dead or Alive beach volleyball just to see the girls jiggle their chest-hams? What do you imagine he does at home behind closed doors when he in playing those games? That’s right – Eww! Well the arcade people could invent a soundproof booth for those perverts to go and watch pixelated characters in compromising situations, featuring Lara and a Resi zombie getting it on, Ivy from Soul Calibur in a bondage fiasco, Jak on Daxter action, and for the pixel fetishists out there Mrs Pac Man: Laid Bare. The booth would contain wipe-clean seats and an extra large box of Kleenex. The perverts can go about their filthy business for a small price and walk out of the booth grinning like the village idiot, and nobody is none the wiser.
3 – Multiplayer Bash
Internet gaming is getting more and more popular and the arcades could host live sessions where you can see all the people you are playing against. The competitors could sit around a large table and blow the crap out of each other without anyone getting hurt. This would rule out those annoying monitor tanned freaks who live in their parents basement who always say stupid things to you in online games because it is their only chance to insult anyone. I think this is a pretty cool idea and would stop those idiots who join games and then quickly leave when the game starts just to annoy everyone, damn I hate those people. This probably would fail because the monitor tanned freaks would be reluctant to get fresh air in their lungs and go to the arcade to play. Hmph
4 – 3D gaming
Developers have created those stupid looking goggles for 3D gaming before, that put the player in the midst of the action. However they never caught on. Arcade owners could put a lot of money into this and make decent ones for a truly riveting 3D gaming experience. Imagine Resident Evil in full 3D with zombies lunging at you and been able to punch them in the face, really, really hard! (It would be like going to a Sheffield Wednesday match) What would be more entertaining would be that people could watch you stumbling around the arcade screaming and punching air at random intervals. This would be fun until someone got punched in the nose and they sued the arcade, a nice idea though.
5 – Not Too Comfy
Playing games at home always has interruptions. You have to go and eat your tea, walk to dog or walk to the shop at the vital point in a game. This surely adds to the gaming experience so the arcade could recreate interruptions for the gamers. Every 15 minutes the ‘arcade mum’ could come and vac around the gaming area and knock out your controller, a younger relative could throw a tantrum every half an hour and run into your room bawling so you miss a vital video clip or clue in the game and every hour a gang of bailiffs can come and repossess your television set. Damn my clichéd childhood, damn it all.
Perhaps one day the arcades will be the only place games are played, especially if the prices at Game keep increasing the way they are doing. Filthy commies, *mutters*
1 – Recreating home environment.
The arcade could perfectly design the average teenage gamers room. There would be an unmade bed a copy of playboy hidden under the mattress, a number of horror videos strewn across the floor and underwear dangling from lampshades. The console would be linked to a TV covered in biscuit crumbs and a VCR with a tape of ‘Channel 5’s post 10:50pm Friday night best bits’ resting inside. The gamer could choose from a variety of games, which they would have to find around the room hidden under dirty laundry, copied CD’s and games magazines. The gamer could then relax in the filthy room playing games charged by the hour and enjoy the homeliness of it all.
2 – Perverts Paradise
You all know that geeky kid at school who is obsessed with Lara Croft, the one who bought Dead or Alive beach volleyball just to see the girls jiggle their chest-hams? What do you imagine he does at home behind closed doors when he in playing those games? That’s right – Eww! Well the arcade people could invent a soundproof booth for those perverts to go and watch pixelated characters in compromising situations, featuring Lara and a Resi zombie getting it on, Ivy from Soul Calibur in a bondage fiasco, Jak on Daxter action, and for the pixel fetishists out there Mrs Pac Man: Laid Bare. The booth would contain wipe-clean seats and an extra large box of Kleenex. The perverts can go about their filthy business for a small price and walk out of the booth grinning like the village idiot, and nobody is none the wiser.
3 – Multiplayer Bash
Internet gaming is getting more and more popular and the arcades could host live sessions where you can see all the people you are playing against. The competitors could sit around a large table and blow the crap out of each other without anyone getting hurt. This would rule out those annoying monitor tanned freaks who live in their parents basement who always say stupid things to you in online games because it is their only chance to insult anyone. I think this is a pretty cool idea and would stop those idiots who join games and then quickly leave when the game starts just to annoy everyone, damn I hate those people. This probably would fail because the monitor tanned freaks would be reluctant to get fresh air in their lungs and go to the arcade to play. Hmph
4 – 3D gaming
Developers have created those stupid looking goggles for 3D gaming before, that put the player in the midst of the action. However they never caught on. Arcade owners could put a lot of money into this and make decent ones for a truly riveting 3D gaming experience. Imagine Resident Evil in full 3D with zombies lunging at you and been able to punch them in the face, really, really hard! (It would be like going to a Sheffield Wednesday match) What would be more entertaining would be that people could watch you stumbling around the arcade screaming and punching air at random intervals. This would be fun until someone got punched in the nose and they sued the arcade, a nice idea though.
5 – Not Too Comfy
Playing games at home always has interruptions. You have to go and eat your tea, walk to dog or walk to the shop at the vital point in a game. This surely adds to the gaming experience so the arcade could recreate interruptions for the gamers. Every 15 minutes the ‘arcade mum’ could come and vac around the gaming area and knock out your controller, a younger relative could throw a tantrum every half an hour and run into your room bawling so you miss a vital video clip or clue in the game and every hour a gang of bailiffs can come and repossess your television set. Damn my clichéd childhood, damn it all.
Perhaps one day the arcades will be the only place games are played, especially if the prices at Game keep increasing the way they are doing. Filthy commies, *mutters*
No I didnt, but I'm going to find it.
.... What?
:-D
.... What?
:-D
*LMAO* a good point, well made :)
back on topic though, did you know there was a "naked" patch available for DoA-Beach Volleyball??
yiiiiiip, someone was actually that lame :-\
back on topic though, did you know there was a "naked" patch available for DoA-Beach Volleyball??
yiiiiiip, someone was actually that lame :-\
Paradox: wrote:
> Thanks for the comments, 'preciate it.
Your welcome :D
> Thanks for the comments, 'preciate it.
Your welcome :D
Penis.
Thanks for the comments, 'preciate it.
Console games haven’t been around that long in retrospect to how long computer games have been gracing the earth. Arcades used to be the only place you could play video games unless you were unhealthily rich and spoilt and had your own arcade game at home. Arcade games weren’t particularly expensive to play and you could finish a game by spending less that £40 like you have to do nowadays. You still can do this, in fact, as it costs around £1 per go on an arcade game and unless you’re lamer than a dead duck you should be able to finish a game in less than forty goes, thus saving you money! But gaming in your home has certain comforts such as been able to play at any time day or night, the privilege of been able to play in your underwear and scratch yourself, or allowing you to pause and return with some food or drink. So what if arcades were to come back big time and beat console games by getting people back into the arcades once again. Here are some methods they may like to try:
1 – Recreating home environment.
The arcade could perfectly design the average teenage gamers room. There would be an unmade bed a copy of playboy hidden under the mattress, a number of horror videos strewn across the floor and underwear dangling from lampshades. The console would be linked to a TV covered in biscuit crumbs and a VCR with a tape of ‘Channel 5’s post 10:50pm Friday night best bits’ resting inside. The gamer could choose from a variety of games, which they would have to find around the room hidden under dirty laundry, copied CD’s and games magazines. The gamer could then relax in the filthy room playing games charged by the hour and enjoy the homeliness of it all.
2 – Perverts Paradise
You all know that geeky kid at school who is obsessed with Lara Croft, the one who bought Dead or Alive beach volleyball just to see the girls jiggle their chest-hams? What do you imagine he does at home behind closed doors when he in playing those games? That’s right – Eww! Well the arcade people could invent a soundproof booth for those perverts to go and watch pixelated characters in compromising situations, featuring Lara and a Resi zombie getting it on, Ivy from Soul Calibur in a bondage fiasco, Jak on Daxter action, and for the pixel fetishists out there Mrs Pac Man: Laid Bare. The booth would contain wipe-clean seats and an extra large box of Kleenex. The perverts can go about their filthy business for a small price and walk out of the booth grinning like the village idiot, and nobody is none the wiser.
3 – Multiplayer Bash
Internet gaming is getting more and more popular and the arcades could host live sessions where you can see all the people you are playing against. The competitors could sit around a large table and blow the crap out of each other without anyone getting hurt. This would rule out those annoying monitor tanned freaks who live in their parents basement who always say stupid things to you in online games because it is their only chance to insult anyone. I think this is a pretty cool idea and would stop those idiots who join games and then quickly leave when the game starts just to annoy everyone, damn I hate those people. This probably would fail because the monitor tanned freaks would be reluctant to get fresh air in their lungs and go to the arcade to play. Hmph
4 – 3D gaming
Developers have created those stupid looking goggles for 3D gaming before, that put the player in the midst of the action. However they never caught on. Arcade owners could put a lot of money into this and make decent ones for a truly riveting 3D gaming experience. Imagine Resident Evil in full 3D with zombies lunging at you and been able to punch them in the face, really, really hard! (It would be like going to a Sheffield Wednesday match) What would be more entertaining would be that people could watch you stumbling around the arcade screaming and punching air at random intervals. This would be fun until someone got punched in the nose and they sued the arcade, a nice idea though.
5 – Not Too Comfy
Playing games at home always has interruptions. You have to go and eat your tea, walk to dog or walk to the shop at the vital point in a game. This surely adds to the gaming experience so the arcade could recreate interruptions for the gamers. Every 15 minutes the ‘arcade mum’ could come and vac around the gaming area and knock out your controller, a younger relative could throw a tantrum every half an hour and run into your room bawling so you miss a vital video clip or clue in the game and every hour a gang of bailiffs can come and repossess your television set. Damn my clichéd childhood, damn it all.
Perhaps one day the arcades will be the only place games are played, especially if the prices at Game keep increasing the way they are doing. Filthy commies, *mutters*
1 – Recreating home environment.
The arcade could perfectly design the average teenage gamers room. There would be an unmade bed a copy of playboy hidden under the mattress, a number of horror videos strewn across the floor and underwear dangling from lampshades. The console would be linked to a TV covered in biscuit crumbs and a VCR with a tape of ‘Channel 5’s post 10:50pm Friday night best bits’ resting inside. The gamer could choose from a variety of games, which they would have to find around the room hidden under dirty laundry, copied CD’s and games magazines. The gamer could then relax in the filthy room playing games charged by the hour and enjoy the homeliness of it all.
2 – Perverts Paradise
You all know that geeky kid at school who is obsessed with Lara Croft, the one who bought Dead or Alive beach volleyball just to see the girls jiggle their chest-hams? What do you imagine he does at home behind closed doors when he in playing those games? That’s right – Eww! Well the arcade people could invent a soundproof booth for those perverts to go and watch pixelated characters in compromising situations, featuring Lara and a Resi zombie getting it on, Ivy from Soul Calibur in a bondage fiasco, Jak on Daxter action, and for the pixel fetishists out there Mrs Pac Man: Laid Bare. The booth would contain wipe-clean seats and an extra large box of Kleenex. The perverts can go about their filthy business for a small price and walk out of the booth grinning like the village idiot, and nobody is none the wiser.
3 – Multiplayer Bash
Internet gaming is getting more and more popular and the arcades could host live sessions where you can see all the people you are playing against. The competitors could sit around a large table and blow the crap out of each other without anyone getting hurt. This would rule out those annoying monitor tanned freaks who live in their parents basement who always say stupid things to you in online games because it is their only chance to insult anyone. I think this is a pretty cool idea and would stop those idiots who join games and then quickly leave when the game starts just to annoy everyone, damn I hate those people. This probably would fail because the monitor tanned freaks would be reluctant to get fresh air in their lungs and go to the arcade to play. Hmph
4 – 3D gaming
Developers have created those stupid looking goggles for 3D gaming before, that put the player in the midst of the action. However they never caught on. Arcade owners could put a lot of money into this and make decent ones for a truly riveting 3D gaming experience. Imagine Resident Evil in full 3D with zombies lunging at you and been able to punch them in the face, really, really hard! (It would be like going to a Sheffield Wednesday match) What would be more entertaining would be that people could watch you stumbling around the arcade screaming and punching air at random intervals. This would be fun until someone got punched in the nose and they sued the arcade, a nice idea though.
5 – Not Too Comfy
Playing games at home always has interruptions. You have to go and eat your tea, walk to dog or walk to the shop at the vital point in a game. This surely adds to the gaming experience so the arcade could recreate interruptions for the gamers. Every 15 minutes the ‘arcade mum’ could come and vac around the gaming area and knock out your controller, a younger relative could throw a tantrum every half an hour and run into your room bawling so you miss a vital video clip or clue in the game and every hour a gang of bailiffs can come and repossess your television set. Damn my clichéd childhood, damn it all.
Perhaps one day the arcades will be the only place games are played, especially if the prices at Game keep increasing the way they are doing. Filthy commies, *mutters*