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"Billy Ocean Finance"

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Sun 08/02/04 at 09:40
Regular
"not dead"
Posts: 11,145
I saw a thread the other day that mentioned Ocean Finance, and, I think, how ugly the people in the adverts were. This morning I couldn’t find it. You see I had this idea for Billy Ocean Finance appear to me this morning, but wanted to check if perhaps I’d read it somewhere else. But I couldn’t find it, so I guess not…?

--\--/--\--/--\--/--\--/--\--/--\--/--

Home improvements, holiday or new car a few pennies too far from you? Then why not take out a loan with Billy Ocean Finance.

From £2000 to £20000, and our interest rates are amongst the lowest of those that advertise on the poor channels.

What’s more, you can consolidate existing debts into one single monthly payment. You could go from paying £350 per month (for 24 months) to just £125 (for the rest of your life).

Tired of driving around in a wreck? Sick of all of the neighbours having a better car than you? Do you dream of having a sports car? Well ‘Get Out of Your Dreams, And Into Your Car’ with a low cost car loan from Billy Ocean Finance.

Are you debt problems keeping you awake all night, or is it because your mattress is so old and tatty that it’s difficult to sleep on? Have the stains become so rigid that it’s uncomfortable? Would you ‘Sleep Much Better In Someone Else’s Bed’? A new bed, bought with a loan from Billy Ocean Finance?

Is your house a dilapidated wreck? Do you need more space for your growing legion of dirty-faced sprogs? Do friends refuse to visit your sticking cess-pit of a home, embarrassed that they might put a hole in your paper-thin walls? Well ‘Tear Down These Walls’ and build your perfect extension with a loan from Billy Ocean Finance.

Do you feel down, need a break? But is the best you can do a mid-week break out of season in Felixstowe? With a loan from Billy Ocean Finance you can go anywhere your heart desires. Perhaps you’ll find the love of your life and be able to settle down with a ‘Caribbean Queen, No More Love On The Run’ for you. This is only possible through a loan with Billy Ocean Finance!

Is your job bringing you down? Are you tired of working for bosses that don’t appreciate you? Well why not earn yourself a ‘Licence to Chill’ and take the money to train for a new rewarding career, with a loan from Ocean Finance.

‘There'll Be Sad Songs To Make You Cry’ if you don’t pay back those loan sharks. They’ll chop off your thumb, and you’ll have to wait years to have it fixed on the NHS. With a loan from Billy Ocean Finance you could get the operation done privately. ‘Suddenly’ your have all of your digits back, and you could borrow enough money to pay back those sharks!

Money makes us happy, the ‘Colour of Love’ is the same as bank-notes. Perhaps you can go out on the town, and find yourselves a ‘Mystery Lady’ or a ‘Loverboy’ with a cash injection, so get into the ‘Love Zone’ with a loan from Billy Ocean Finance.

‘Here’s To You’, Billy Ocean Finance customer, because ‘When The Going Gets Tough, The Tough Get Loaning!’

(Your home, possessions and good name are at risk if you do not keep up repayments. We may be forced to send around Billy Ocean and his good friends Billy Joel and Billy Idol to give you a crowbar make-over should you not stick to the terms and conditions.)
Mon 09/02/04 at 20:40
Regular
"Hallelujah"
Posts: 2,731
You'd like us to believe that wouldn't you?
Mon 09/02/04 at 16:33
Regular
"not dead"
Posts: 11,145
The only Billy Ocean songs I thought I knew before writing this were "Get out of my dreams, and into my car" and "When the going gets tough, the tough get going", both songs with incredibly long titles. So I searched for Billy Ocean online, and took all of the songs from the back of his greatest hits, and put them in here. But when I looked, some of the others sounded familiar, like 'Caribbean Queen, (No More Love On The Run)’.

I'm not a fan.
Sun 08/02/04 at 17:13
Regular
"Monochromatic"
Posts: 18,487
well done you made us laugh,and now your reputation's ruined
Sun 08/02/04 at 16:45
Moderator
"possibly impossible"
Posts: 24,985
It's obvious, Meka is the sole owner of Billy Ocean's complete works. He even owns the rights to some of Billy's later albums (the record company gave them away free with the CDs in a hope to sell them).

Billy also comes around to his house to clean Meka's car twice a month.
Sun 08/02/04 at 11:57
Regular
"TheShiznit.co.uk"
Posts: 6,592
Brr, terrifying - the triumverate of pop Billies coming round your gaff looking for blood.

That was great - how many of those song titles did you actually know, and how many did you get off his greatest hits album? The only Billy Ocean song anyone remembers is Get Out Of My Heart, Get Into My Car and that was because it had a cartoon rabbit in it.
Sun 08/02/04 at 09:40
Regular
"not dead"
Posts: 11,145
I saw a thread the other day that mentioned Ocean Finance, and, I think, how ugly the people in the adverts were. This morning I couldn’t find it. You see I had this idea for Billy Ocean Finance appear to me this morning, but wanted to check if perhaps I’d read it somewhere else. But I couldn’t find it, so I guess not…?

--\--/--\--/--\--/--\--/--\--/--\--/--

Home improvements, holiday or new car a few pennies too far from you? Then why not take out a loan with Billy Ocean Finance.

From £2000 to £20000, and our interest rates are amongst the lowest of those that advertise on the poor channels.

What’s more, you can consolidate existing debts into one single monthly payment. You could go from paying £350 per month (for 24 months) to just £125 (for the rest of your life).

Tired of driving around in a wreck? Sick of all of the neighbours having a better car than you? Do you dream of having a sports car? Well ‘Get Out of Your Dreams, And Into Your Car’ with a low cost car loan from Billy Ocean Finance.

Are you debt problems keeping you awake all night, or is it because your mattress is so old and tatty that it’s difficult to sleep on? Have the stains become so rigid that it’s uncomfortable? Would you ‘Sleep Much Better In Someone Else’s Bed’? A new bed, bought with a loan from Billy Ocean Finance?

Is your house a dilapidated wreck? Do you need more space for your growing legion of dirty-faced sprogs? Do friends refuse to visit your sticking cess-pit of a home, embarrassed that they might put a hole in your paper-thin walls? Well ‘Tear Down These Walls’ and build your perfect extension with a loan from Billy Ocean Finance.

Do you feel down, need a break? But is the best you can do a mid-week break out of season in Felixstowe? With a loan from Billy Ocean Finance you can go anywhere your heart desires. Perhaps you’ll find the love of your life and be able to settle down with a ‘Caribbean Queen, No More Love On The Run’ for you. This is only possible through a loan with Billy Ocean Finance!

Is your job bringing you down? Are you tired of working for bosses that don’t appreciate you? Well why not earn yourself a ‘Licence to Chill’ and take the money to train for a new rewarding career, with a loan from Ocean Finance.

‘There'll Be Sad Songs To Make You Cry’ if you don’t pay back those loan sharks. They’ll chop off your thumb, and you’ll have to wait years to have it fixed on the NHS. With a loan from Billy Ocean Finance you could get the operation done privately. ‘Suddenly’ your have all of your digits back, and you could borrow enough money to pay back those sharks!

Money makes us happy, the ‘Colour of Love’ is the same as bank-notes. Perhaps you can go out on the town, and find yourselves a ‘Mystery Lady’ or a ‘Loverboy’ with a cash injection, so get into the ‘Love Zone’ with a loan from Billy Ocean Finance.

‘Here’s To You’, Billy Ocean Finance customer, because ‘When The Going Gets Tough, The Tough Get Loaning!’

(Your home, possessions and good name are at risk if you do not keep up repayments. We may be forced to send around Billy Ocean and his good friends Billy Joel and Billy Idol to give you a crowbar make-over should you not stick to the terms and conditions.)

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