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The year is 2050, the world is shocked after veteran gamer Alister Gray dies of a heart attack while playing "Dead or Alive 19" in the third annual ultimate videogamer tournament in Chicago! Alisters close friend Tony commented:
"Nobody expected Alister to die so young, especially me, I've tried to kill him multiple times and have always failed!"
Influential US senator Fantasy Meister has called for all gamers over the age of 65 are banned from entering such competitions, except himself!
The events organiser The Old Jimmy has reacted by saying:
"Gamers are Gamers, no matter their age or background they should be free to play what they want! Just like my 2 year old son New Jimmy the Second, if he wants to play "House of the Dead 57: Return to Hell" then nobody should stop him. He always beats me on it, but thats only because of my arthritis!"
(The Old Jimmy was later sent for execution, after being tried and found guilty on 57 seperate counts of corrupting minors through Videogames!)
PrimeMinster Sheepy, who was attending a EU conference in Brussels is said to be in a state of shock. Ali was a close friend, and his death could not have come at a worse time for the PrimeMinister. Only last week 13 of the PrimeMinisters closest family were slaughtered after they were found to be infected by foot and mouth disease!
In other news, Ant the half human/half ant genetic chimera has won the WWF championship for the 5th time. When asked what the secret of his success was, Ant replied:
"Sugar!"
"Nobody expected Alister to die so young, especially me, I've tried to kill him multiple times and have always failed!"
Influential US senator Fantasy Meister has called for all gamers over the age of 65 are banned from entering such competitions, except himself!
The events organiser The Old Jimmy has reacted by saying:
"Gamers are Gamers, no matter their age or background they should be free to play what they want! Just like my 2 year old son New Jimmy the Second, if he wants to play "House of the Dead 57: Return to Hell" then nobody should stop him. He always beats me on it, but thats only because of my arthritis!"
(The Old Jimmy was later sent for execution, after being tried and found guilty on 57 seperate counts of corrupting minors through Videogames!)
PrimeMinster Sheepy, who was attending a EU conference in Brussels is said to be in a state of shock. Ali was a close friend, and his death could not have come at a worse time for the PrimeMinister. Only last week 13 of the PrimeMinisters closest family were slaughtered after they were found to be infected by foot and mouth disease!
In other news, Ant the half human/half ant genetic chimera has won the WWF championship for the 5th time. When asked what the secret of his success was, Ant replied:
"Sugar!"
That's not so bad. He can count that many on the fingers of one hoof.
Influential US Senator FantasyMeister was also quoted as saying:
"That depends on what your definition of 'is' is",
and
"I did not have sex with that console".
He was later remanded in custody for crimes against humour.
"That depends on what your definition of 'is' is",
and
"I did not have sex with that console".
He was later remanded in custody for crimes against humour.
The year is 2050, the world is shocked after veteran gamer Alister Gray dies of a heart attack while playing "Dead or Alive 19" in the third annual ultimate videogamer tournament in Chicago! Alisters close friend Tony commented:
"Nobody expected Alister to die so young, especially me, I've tried to kill him multiple times and have always failed!"
Influential US senator Fantasy Meister has called for all gamers over the age of 65 are banned from entering such competitions, except himself!
The events organiser The Old Jimmy has reacted by saying:
"Gamers are Gamers, no matter their age or background they should be free to play what they want! Just like my 2 year old son New Jimmy the Second, if he wants to play "House of the Dead 57: Return to Hell" then nobody should stop him. He always beats me on it, but thats only because of my arthritis!"
(The Old Jimmy was later sent for execution, after being tried and found guilty on 57 seperate counts of corrupting minors through Videogames!)
PrimeMinster Sheepy, who was attending a EU conference in Brussels is said to be in a state of shock. Ali was a close friend, and his death could not have come at a worse time for the PrimeMinister. Only last week 13 of the PrimeMinisters closest family were slaughtered after they were found to be infected by foot and mouth disease!
In other news, Ant the half human/half ant genetic chimera has won the WWF championship for the 5th time. When asked what the secret of his success was, Ant replied:
"Sugar!"
"Nobody expected Alister to die so young, especially me, I've tried to kill him multiple times and have always failed!"
Influential US senator Fantasy Meister has called for all gamers over the age of 65 are banned from entering such competitions, except himself!
The events organiser The Old Jimmy has reacted by saying:
"Gamers are Gamers, no matter their age or background they should be free to play what they want! Just like my 2 year old son New Jimmy the Second, if he wants to play "House of the Dead 57: Return to Hell" then nobody should stop him. He always beats me on it, but thats only because of my arthritis!"
(The Old Jimmy was later sent for execution, after being tried and found guilty on 57 seperate counts of corrupting minors through Videogames!)
PrimeMinster Sheepy, who was attending a EU conference in Brussels is said to be in a state of shock. Ali was a close friend, and his death could not have come at a worse time for the PrimeMinister. Only last week 13 of the PrimeMinisters closest family were slaughtered after they were found to be infected by foot and mouth disease!
In other news, Ant the half human/half ant genetic chimera has won the WWF championship for the 5th time. When asked what the secret of his success was, Ant replied:
"Sugar!"