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For many a night out to the pub is a good laugh and a good end to the week, the only real complains about it are that it is expensive. Plus when you are drunk you end up being generous and spending your week’s wages buying everyone in the pub a pint. So why not turn going to the pub into a computer game? It is practical; you have a virtual booze binge at home in front of your console and don’t give the contents of your wallet to a plum-faced barman.
So, how would a game like this work? Well first of all you would need to recruit some pub-buddies either from your workplace or college but before doing so you need to give them a reason to go drinking with you. You have to earn charisma points in order to recruit pub-buddies; the more charisma points the more pub buddies and the better the night out! You would go about earning charisma points by doing such wild things as stapling your bosses tie to a stack of file-paper or photo-copying your bum 500 times. Do crazy things like these and people will be desperate to accompany you to the old watering hole and buy you a pint.
Once you have a suitable amount of people you have to direct them to the pub using Conflict Desert Storm commands including “follow me”, “Get a cab” or “Give us a lift, mate”. Once you get to the pub you will need someone to infiltrate to area and relay information back to you. This can be done by the “How much is a pint?”, “Are there any birds in?” and “Do they do lock-ins?” commands. Once you have found a suitable drinking establishment to quench your thirst you move inside for the evening to really begin.
You can either prop yourself up against the bar or sit in a booth with your buddies and have a few little mini-games seeing who can down a pint the in the shortest time, who can do the biggest burp and who doesn’t manage to urinate down their trouser leg in their semi-sloshed state. The game then adopts a turn-based strategy feel as each of the pub-buddies have to stumble to the bar and get in a round without spilling as little precious alcohol as possible.
As the booze keeps flowing your “drunk-o-meter” will fill up until you reach the “absolutely wasted” point. This allows you to pull off combos such as karate-chopping a beer mat and betting your car keys on a game of poker. However after the temporary brilliance of being drunk wears off you will start to realise you work a menial job and live alone in a 1 bedroom flat and all you need is the love of a good woman.
So the next portion of the game is spent trying to chat up women in a mini-game called ‘Who Wants To Pull A Brilliant Mare’. You have 15 sets of chat-up lines, in groups of 4. You have to get the right combination of chat up lines and the girl will be yours, otherwise you will leave with a slapped face and damaged pride. Of course, there will be ways to help you achieve the goal of pulling, you can phone a mate to ask him what chat-up line would be appropriate, you can ask your pub-buddies or you can take a 50-50.
Other drunken mini-games include not missing the urinal, starting a fight with a bouncer and the all new breathalyser test in which you have to convince the police man who pulled you over that you are “absholuuutely, poshhhitivelyyy, not drunkkkk”. If you pull this off you can also try reciting the alphabet backwards and walking in a straight line.
Once your drunken evening draws to a close you can stumble home and try and order a kebab to soak up the 15 pints you have flooded your innards with. If you manage to make it as far as your front door you realise you have forgotten your keys and have the option of either sleeping on your doormat like a washed up hobo or breaking into your own house and forfeiting your no claims bonus on your home insurance.
You then wake up 15 hours later in a pool of your own vomit, one side of your body entirely numb and a phone-number scrawled in lipstick across your arm and realise you had a bloody good night.
Coming soon: Hangovers – The Game
So, how would a game like this work? Well first of all you would need to recruit some pub-buddies either from your workplace or college but before doing so you need to give them a reason to go drinking with you. You have to earn charisma points in order to recruit pub-buddies; the more charisma points the more pub buddies and the better the night out! You would go about earning charisma points by doing such wild things as stapling your bosses tie to a stack of file-paper or photo-copying your bum 500 times. Do crazy things like these and people will be desperate to accompany you to the old watering hole and buy you a pint.
Once you have a suitable amount of people you have to direct them to the pub using Conflict Desert Storm commands including “follow me”, “Get a cab” or “Give us a lift, mate”. Once you get to the pub you will need someone to infiltrate to area and relay information back to you. This can be done by the “How much is a pint?”, “Are there any birds in?” and “Do they do lock-ins?” commands. Once you have found a suitable drinking establishment to quench your thirst you move inside for the evening to really begin.
You can either prop yourself up against the bar or sit in a booth with your buddies and have a few little mini-games seeing who can down a pint the in the shortest time, who can do the biggest burp and who doesn’t manage to urinate down their trouser leg in their semi-sloshed state. The game then adopts a turn-based strategy feel as each of the pub-buddies have to stumble to the bar and get in a round without spilling as little precious alcohol as possible.
As the booze keeps flowing your “drunk-o-meter” will fill up until you reach the “absolutely wasted” point. This allows you to pull off combos such as karate-chopping a beer mat and betting your car keys on a game of poker. However after the temporary brilliance of being drunk wears off you will start to realise you work a menial job and live alone in a 1 bedroom flat and all you need is the love of a good woman.
So the next portion of the game is spent trying to chat up women in a mini-game called ‘Who Wants To Pull A Brilliant Mare’. You have 15 sets of chat-up lines, in groups of 4. You have to get the right combination of chat up lines and the girl will be yours, otherwise you will leave with a slapped face and damaged pride. Of course, there will be ways to help you achieve the goal of pulling, you can phone a mate to ask him what chat-up line would be appropriate, you can ask your pub-buddies or you can take a 50-50.
Other drunken mini-games include not missing the urinal, starting a fight with a bouncer and the all new breathalyser test in which you have to convince the police man who pulled you over that you are “absholuuutely, poshhhitivelyyy, not drunkkkk”. If you pull this off you can also try reciting the alphabet backwards and walking in a straight line.
Once your drunken evening draws to a close you can stumble home and try and order a kebab to soak up the 15 pints you have flooded your innards with. If you manage to make it as far as your front door you realise you have forgotten your keys and have the option of either sleeping on your doormat like a washed up hobo or breaking into your own house and forfeiting your no claims bonus on your home insurance.
You then wake up 15 hours later in a pool of your own vomit, one side of your body entirely numb and a phone-number scrawled in lipstick across your arm and realise you had a bloody good night.
Coming soon: Hangovers – The Game
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Vice City, perhaps?
lol good thread but there should be some action in it like stealing taxis and driving them to the pub or walking around wacking people with a baseball bat...hang on those sound familiar.
I wasn't complaining for goodness sake! Espically relevant as when people complain about the quality of posts I'm always the one complaining about the complaining.
Dr Gonzo wrote:
> That reminds me of another game, ‘Blatant GAD Attempt: The Return’
>
> ;)
*
LOL! Swish!
Good post mind.
> That reminds me of another game, ‘Blatant GAD Attempt: The Return’
>
> ;)
*
LOL! Swish!
Good post mind.
:-D
Dr Gonzo wrote:
> That reminds me of another game, ‘Blatant GAD Attempt: The Return’
>
> ;)
Then you people complain that there is no good posts.
Then when someone starts posting good, you complain.
> That reminds me of another game, ‘Blatant GAD Attempt: The Return’
>
> ;)
Then you people complain that there is no good posts.
Then when someone starts posting good, you complain.
Ironic reading this just coming back from the pub!
Dr Gonzo wrote:
> That reminds me of another game, ‘Blatant GAD Attempt: The Return’
>
>
But without the smiley.
> That reminds me of another game, ‘Blatant GAD Attempt: The Return’
>
>
But without the smiley.
Haha. "Are there an birds in?" Yes, I like those commands.
I can't even recite the alphabet backwards in a sober state.
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