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The "Vote for me!" thread - two varieties of this one. Mostly "comedy" threads, which contain messages like "Vote for me or I'll bash your grandma about", or "Vote for me or your pets get hysterectomies". They may seem like merely humerous posts, but really they are intended to gain your trust and confidence so you vote for that person. Be wary. The second variety is not as sneaky - simply an out and out "Vote for me! Because..well...vote for me!". cf: Crazy col.
The "Vote for him" thread - again two variations. The first is regular-to-regular, ie a regular telling you to vote for another regular. What they're actually trying to do is make you realise how kind they are so you vote for them. Also they hope the person in question will return the favour. Conniving b-stards. The second is notable-to-regular, ie a notable telling you to vote for a regular. They are actually trying to use their influence and skank-coloured name as a primitive form of brainwashing/mind control. Avoid at all costs.
The "Vote for this notable" thread - someone invariably asks you to vote for a notable, probably in the desire that you'll think they are zany and wacky and deserve to be notable themselves. Don't buy it.
The "Vote for some random word I just threw in" thread - ie "Vote for Billy's socks", "Vote for this person's mum", "Vote for George W. Bush". See above.
The "Don't vote" thread - urging you to abstain, God knows why. Best thread, I started it.
The "Don't vote for me" thread - similar to the "Vote for me!" thread in that it often features a threat. For instance, "Vote for me and I'll kick you in the teeth", "Vote for me and I'll strap C4 to your part". This thread is either shameless reverse psychology, or the person is actually very lonely and wants your votes but is too ashamed to admit it. Don't bother with this thread.
The "Vote for me because..." thread - this person lays all their cards on the table straight away. It's an attention grabber; even if you don't read the thread you still know why that person think they deserve your vote. Can be used in a comedy style, eg "Vot 4 me bcuz i m a foreum treshur an ded nicce". Usually not funny, ironic.
The "I got here first" thread - as with any new forum there'll be someone who starts a "I'm first!" or "I'm first!?" thread. Ignore at leisure.
The "Who will win?" thread - an attempt to guess who will win the election. Some people will say someone's name in order to flatter them so they get an extra vote from that peep. I won't stand for it.
The "Who are you going to vote for?" thread - stupidest of all the threads, the thought that possibly this might be why we have the election in the first place passes the starter by.
The "Running commentary" thread - where people update on the score every five seconds. Useless.
The "I've come up with a pun on the word 'notable' and shall create a thread to tell everyone" thread - "not-able" is the usual one dragged out of the closet every quarter year. Just leave it at home.
The "What you can expect in the next week or so..." thread - a blatantly obvious attempt to get your votes.
Moral of the story: don't trust people.
> The "Who will win?" thread - an attempt to guess who will
> win the election. Some people will say someone's name in order to
> flatter them so they get an extra vote from that peep. I won't stand
> for it.
*hangs head in shame, although I was stating the truth. Flattering Microchips is very hard!*
Re-arrange at your leisure.
> Who dares me to submit it as a review?
---
Ooh, double dare.
Or even, triple dare!!!
> The "I got here first" thread - as with any new forum
> there'll be someone who starts a "I'm first!" or "I'm
> first!?" thread. Ignore at leisure.
*face turns red*