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The girlfriend is about to leave me. And the bad news is she's taking the dog with her.
Seriously, it's all over between us and, to be completely honest, I'm quite relieved. For the last two years or so we'd turned into "just good friends" and I didn't have the guts to say "Any chance you could move out so I can have sex with other women, position my speakers in a decent spot and watch porn?"
But then I realise that she owns the fridge, the cooker, the living room furniture, the microwave, the freezer, the dining table and chairs and the bedroom furniture. So I need money, and lots of it.
Then a mate emails me and invites me to a party in Southampton over the weekend which I go to and have a thoroughly good time at. And whilst I'm there my mate introduces me to various people as "my mate, Tim, who does average websites" and so I end up getting enough work to pay for a new fridge, cooker, microwave etc.
And when I get home from the party, the soon-to-be ex-girlfriend tells me that she's been considering it and has decided to let me keep the bedroom and living room furniture!
Who says splitting up is a bad thing?
P.S. Sorry if this seems a bit jumbled but I rushed it because my fish and chips have just been delivered!
Seriously, it's all over between us and, to be completely honest, I'm quite relieved. For the last two years or so we'd turned into "just good friends" and I didn't have the guts to say "Any chance you could move out so I can have sex with other women, position my speakers in a decent spot and watch porn?"
But then I realise that she owns the fridge, the cooker, the living room furniture, the microwave, the freezer, the dining table and chairs and the bedroom furniture. So I need money, and lots of it.
Then a mate emails me and invites me to a party in Southampton over the weekend which I go to and have a thoroughly good time at. And whilst I'm there my mate introduces me to various people as "my mate, Tim, who does average websites" and so I end up getting enough work to pay for a new fridge, cooker, microwave etc.
And when I get home from the party, the soon-to-be ex-girlfriend tells me that she's been considering it and has decided to let me keep the bedroom and living room furniture!
Who says splitting up is a bad thing?
P.S. Sorry if this seems a bit jumbled but I rushed it because my fish and chips have just been delivered!
The thought of moving in with anyone makes me cringe, my last girlfriend tried to get us engaged and started house hunting for a 'family home'(SCARY)... Needless to say Ive been single since and Im currently doing extensive reserch (funded by other scarred batchelors) into the thought processes of the female brain...
:D
*Displays the batchelor for life sign tattoed onto left buttock
:D
*Displays the batchelor for life sign tattoed onto left buttock
At least your free to find someone who makes you happy now.
Timmargh wrote:
> P.S. Sorry if this seems a bit jumbled but I rushed it because my fish
> and chips have just been delivered!
That just sums up not having a wonam in your life doesn't it!
And I haven't got a clue what a wonam is...
> P.S. Sorry if this seems a bit jumbled but I rushed it because my fish
> and chips have just been delivered!
That just sums up not having a wonam in your life doesn't it!
And I haven't got a clue what a wonam is...
The girlfriend is about to leave me. And the bad news is she's taking the dog with her.
Seriously, it's all over between us and, to be completely honest, I'm quite relieved. For the last two years or so we'd turned into "just good friends" and I didn't have the guts to say "Any chance you could move out so I can have sex with other women, position my speakers in a decent spot and watch porn?"
But then I realise that she owns the fridge, the cooker, the living room furniture, the microwave, the freezer, the dining table and chairs and the bedroom furniture. So I need money, and lots of it.
Then a mate emails me and invites me to a party in Southampton over the weekend which I go to and have a thoroughly good time at. And whilst I'm there my mate introduces me to various people as "my mate, Tim, who does average websites" and so I end up getting enough work to pay for a new fridge, cooker, microwave etc.
And when I get home from the party, the soon-to-be ex-girlfriend tells me that she's been considering it and has decided to let me keep the bedroom and living room furniture!
Who says splitting up is a bad thing?
P.S. Sorry if this seems a bit jumbled but I rushed it because my fish and chips have just been delivered!
Seriously, it's all over between us and, to be completely honest, I'm quite relieved. For the last two years or so we'd turned into "just good friends" and I didn't have the guts to say "Any chance you could move out so I can have sex with other women, position my speakers in a decent spot and watch porn?"
But then I realise that she owns the fridge, the cooker, the living room furniture, the microwave, the freezer, the dining table and chairs and the bedroom furniture. So I need money, and lots of it.
Then a mate emails me and invites me to a party in Southampton over the weekend which I go to and have a thoroughly good time at. And whilst I'm there my mate introduces me to various people as "my mate, Tim, who does average websites" and so I end up getting enough work to pay for a new fridge, cooker, microwave etc.
And when I get home from the party, the soon-to-be ex-girlfriend tells me that she's been considering it and has decided to let me keep the bedroom and living room furniture!
Who says splitting up is a bad thing?
P.S. Sorry if this seems a bit jumbled but I rushed it because my fish and chips have just been delivered!