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The progress of the coalition push into Baghdad was delayed last night after Saddam Hussein’s forces unleashed what is believed to be the first, and possibly only, one of Iraq’s chemical weapons.
Coalition troops first noticed something was wrong when their highly trained chemical detecting canaries started coughing, retching and gasping for breath at a horrible smell on the outskirts of Baghdad. At first, the troops thought someone had just let an almighty eggy one off due to the poor army catering standards, but the gasmasks went on and the atmosphere was tested for all known chemical or biological agents, and indeed, some traces of gas were detected. The substance in question was revealed to be ‘Farteous Gaseous’, or regular harmless fart gas to you and me. Yes, Saddam used a giant stink bomb.
One of the military grunts on the scene likened the smell to that of his beloved pig farm back in Yokelville Louisiana by saying, “Heck, when we first smelt that there smell it reminded me of my hillbilly ranch back home, rolling around in the mud and slurry with my beloved pot-bellied pigs and shooting beavers with my brother Cletus.” A senior US official then wanted to quickly point out to the worlds media that, despite how many appeared, not all the US troops were slack-jawed inbreeding hillbillies with itchy trigger fingers.
Colonel Rick Powers of The 3rd Infantry Division was quick to play down the severity of the stink bomb incident, but later warned that it could only be the tip of the iceberg with Saddam’s chemical weapon usage, “We knew he had chemical weapons. We just knew it, and now he’s proven it. OK, so this time it was only harmless fart gas, but next time we may not be so lucky, he may later decide to use something more severe to justify our participation in this big war. Maybe. I’m sure that when we catch up with Saddam we’ll give him a big wedgie and stink palm him to return the favour.”
Colonel Powers later added that most of the heroic chemical detecting canaries survived the stink attack, but one sadly passed away from a heart attack in the panic and smell, and evil Saddam would have another death of an innocent creature on his unremorseful conscience. The deceased canary will be flown back to the United States where it will receive a full military funeral with Stealth Bomber flyby, 21-gun salute and a tribute speech from President George W. Bush himself in front on thousands of loyal marine automatons.
The idea of using a giant stink bomb to attack US and UK forces is believed to be the brainchild of the much-feared ‘Chemical Ali’, who is a well-known advocate of the stink bomb and has also often tricked Saddam with the fake cigarette and Clingfilm-on-the-toilet-seat japes in the past, so wanted to try out the industrial sized stink bomb on the battlefield to justify his ‘Chemical’ moniker.
The use of a giant stink bomb fired on a ground-to-ground missile is thought to be Saddam’s last desperate attempt to stop invading coalition forces from taking Baghdad, as his Republican Guards have been rather disappointing yellow-bellied cowards. It is not known at this time if Saddam has any more stink bombs in his arsenal ready to unleash, much to the detriment of noses across Baghdad, but some sources indicate that the one stink bomb fired may have been his single solitary “chemical weapon” the US were so adamant he had many of. If that proves to be the case, President Bush will not only have egg on his face (due to having the table manners of a chimp), but will also be forced to eat a giant slice of good ol’ humble pie.
At this moment in time, along with their regular high-tech chemical protection suits and detection equipment, soldiers have now been issued with simple clothes pegs in case of further stink bomb attacks.
Coalition troops first noticed something was wrong when their highly trained chemical detecting canaries started coughing, retching and gasping for breath at a horrible smell on the outskirts of Baghdad. At first, the troops thought someone had just let an almighty eggy one off due to the poor army catering standards, but the gasmasks went on and the atmosphere was tested for all known chemical or biological agents, and indeed, some traces of gas were detected. The substance in question was revealed to be ‘Farteous Gaseous’, or regular harmless fart gas to you and me. Yes, Saddam used a giant stink bomb.
One of the military grunts on the scene likened the smell to that of his beloved pig farm back in Yokelville Louisiana by saying, “Heck, when we first smelt that there smell it reminded me of my hillbilly ranch back home, rolling around in the mud and slurry with my beloved pot-bellied pigs and shooting beavers with my brother Cletus.” A senior US official then wanted to quickly point out to the worlds media that, despite how many appeared, not all the US troops were slack-jawed inbreeding hillbillies with itchy trigger fingers.
Colonel Rick Powers of The 3rd Infantry Division was quick to play down the severity of the stink bomb incident, but later warned that it could only be the tip of the iceberg with Saddam’s chemical weapon usage, “We knew he had chemical weapons. We just knew it, and now he’s proven it. OK, so this time it was only harmless fart gas, but next time we may not be so lucky, he may later decide to use something more severe to justify our participation in this big war. Maybe. I’m sure that when we catch up with Saddam we’ll give him a big wedgie and stink palm him to return the favour.”
Colonel Powers later added that most of the heroic chemical detecting canaries survived the stink attack, but one sadly passed away from a heart attack in the panic and smell, and evil Saddam would have another death of an innocent creature on his unremorseful conscience. The deceased canary will be flown back to the United States where it will receive a full military funeral with Stealth Bomber flyby, 21-gun salute and a tribute speech from President George W. Bush himself in front on thousands of loyal marine automatons.
The idea of using a giant stink bomb to attack US and UK forces is believed to be the brainchild of the much-feared ‘Chemical Ali’, who is a well-known advocate of the stink bomb and has also often tricked Saddam with the fake cigarette and Clingfilm-on-the-toilet-seat japes in the past, so wanted to try out the industrial sized stink bomb on the battlefield to justify his ‘Chemical’ moniker.
The use of a giant stink bomb fired on a ground-to-ground missile is thought to be Saddam’s last desperate attempt to stop invading coalition forces from taking Baghdad, as his Republican Guards have been rather disappointing yellow-bellied cowards. It is not known at this time if Saddam has any more stink bombs in his arsenal ready to unleash, much to the detriment of noses across Baghdad, but some sources indicate that the one stink bomb fired may have been his single solitary “chemical weapon” the US were so adamant he had many of. If that proves to be the case, President Bush will not only have egg on his face (due to having the table manners of a chimp), but will also be forced to eat a giant slice of good ol’ humble pie.
At this moment in time, along with their regular high-tech chemical protection suits and detection equipment, soldiers have now been issued with simple clothes pegs in case of further stink bomb attacks.
It was amusing but I'm not sure about it being satire, seeing as it was entirely fictional using only the idea of chemical weapons as a basis.
It's called satire man, relax.
And besides, did anyone force those poor innocent soldiers to become soldiers in the first place? No, they didn't.
And besides, did anyone force those poor innocent soldiers to become soldiers in the first place? No, they didn't.
That is really in human.
Since people are free compared to iraqi people they think they can joke about it. Come on people have family members in the gulf grow up
Since people are free compared to iraqi people they think they can joke about it. Come on people have family members in the gulf grow up
The progress of the coalition push into Baghdad was delayed last night after Saddam Hussein’s forces unleashed what is believed to be the first, and possibly only, one of Iraq’s chemical weapons.
Coalition troops first noticed something was wrong when their highly trained chemical detecting canaries started coughing, retching and gasping for breath at a horrible smell on the outskirts of Baghdad. At first, the troops thought someone had just let an almighty eggy one off due to the poor army catering standards, but the gasmasks went on and the atmosphere was tested for all known chemical or biological agents, and indeed, some traces of gas were detected. The substance in question was revealed to be ‘Farteous Gaseous’, or regular harmless fart gas to you and me. Yes, Saddam used a giant stink bomb.
One of the military grunts on the scene likened the smell to that of his beloved pig farm back in Yokelville Louisiana by saying, “Heck, when we first smelt that there smell it reminded me of my hillbilly ranch back home, rolling around in the mud and slurry with my beloved pot-bellied pigs and shooting beavers with my brother Cletus.” A senior US official then wanted to quickly point out to the worlds media that, despite how many appeared, not all the US troops were slack-jawed inbreeding hillbillies with itchy trigger fingers.
Colonel Rick Powers of The 3rd Infantry Division was quick to play down the severity of the stink bomb incident, but later warned that it could only be the tip of the iceberg with Saddam’s chemical weapon usage, “We knew he had chemical weapons. We just knew it, and now he’s proven it. OK, so this time it was only harmless fart gas, but next time we may not be so lucky, he may later decide to use something more severe to justify our participation in this big war. Maybe. I’m sure that when we catch up with Saddam we’ll give him a big wedgie and stink palm him to return the favour.”
Colonel Powers later added that most of the heroic chemical detecting canaries survived the stink attack, but one sadly passed away from a heart attack in the panic and smell, and evil Saddam would have another death of an innocent creature on his unremorseful conscience. The deceased canary will be flown back to the United States where it will receive a full military funeral with Stealth Bomber flyby, 21-gun salute and a tribute speech from President George W. Bush himself in front on thousands of loyal marine automatons.
The idea of using a giant stink bomb to attack US and UK forces is believed to be the brainchild of the much-feared ‘Chemical Ali’, who is a well-known advocate of the stink bomb and has also often tricked Saddam with the fake cigarette and Clingfilm-on-the-toilet-seat japes in the past, so wanted to try out the industrial sized stink bomb on the battlefield to justify his ‘Chemical’ moniker.
The use of a giant stink bomb fired on a ground-to-ground missile is thought to be Saddam’s last desperate attempt to stop invading coalition forces from taking Baghdad, as his Republican Guards have been rather disappointing yellow-bellied cowards. It is not known at this time if Saddam has any more stink bombs in his arsenal ready to unleash, much to the detriment of noses across Baghdad, but some sources indicate that the one stink bomb fired may have been his single solitary “chemical weapon” the US were so adamant he had many of. If that proves to be the case, President Bush will not only have egg on his face (due to having the table manners of a chimp), but will also be forced to eat a giant slice of good ol’ humble pie.
At this moment in time, along with their regular high-tech chemical protection suits and detection equipment, soldiers have now been issued with simple clothes pegs in case of further stink bomb attacks.
Coalition troops first noticed something was wrong when their highly trained chemical detecting canaries started coughing, retching and gasping for breath at a horrible smell on the outskirts of Baghdad. At first, the troops thought someone had just let an almighty eggy one off due to the poor army catering standards, but the gasmasks went on and the atmosphere was tested for all known chemical or biological agents, and indeed, some traces of gas were detected. The substance in question was revealed to be ‘Farteous Gaseous’, or regular harmless fart gas to you and me. Yes, Saddam used a giant stink bomb.
One of the military grunts on the scene likened the smell to that of his beloved pig farm back in Yokelville Louisiana by saying, “Heck, when we first smelt that there smell it reminded me of my hillbilly ranch back home, rolling around in the mud and slurry with my beloved pot-bellied pigs and shooting beavers with my brother Cletus.” A senior US official then wanted to quickly point out to the worlds media that, despite how many appeared, not all the US troops were slack-jawed inbreeding hillbillies with itchy trigger fingers.
Colonel Rick Powers of The 3rd Infantry Division was quick to play down the severity of the stink bomb incident, but later warned that it could only be the tip of the iceberg with Saddam’s chemical weapon usage, “We knew he had chemical weapons. We just knew it, and now he’s proven it. OK, so this time it was only harmless fart gas, but next time we may not be so lucky, he may later decide to use something more severe to justify our participation in this big war. Maybe. I’m sure that when we catch up with Saddam we’ll give him a big wedgie and stink palm him to return the favour.”
Colonel Powers later added that most of the heroic chemical detecting canaries survived the stink attack, but one sadly passed away from a heart attack in the panic and smell, and evil Saddam would have another death of an innocent creature on his unremorseful conscience. The deceased canary will be flown back to the United States where it will receive a full military funeral with Stealth Bomber flyby, 21-gun salute and a tribute speech from President George W. Bush himself in front on thousands of loyal marine automatons.
The idea of using a giant stink bomb to attack US and UK forces is believed to be the brainchild of the much-feared ‘Chemical Ali’, who is a well-known advocate of the stink bomb and has also often tricked Saddam with the fake cigarette and Clingfilm-on-the-toilet-seat japes in the past, so wanted to try out the industrial sized stink bomb on the battlefield to justify his ‘Chemical’ moniker.
The use of a giant stink bomb fired on a ground-to-ground missile is thought to be Saddam’s last desperate attempt to stop invading coalition forces from taking Baghdad, as his Republican Guards have been rather disappointing yellow-bellied cowards. It is not known at this time if Saddam has any more stink bombs in his arsenal ready to unleash, much to the detriment of noses across Baghdad, but some sources indicate that the one stink bomb fired may have been his single solitary “chemical weapon” the US were so adamant he had many of. If that proves to be the case, President Bush will not only have egg on his face (due to having the table manners of a chimp), but will also be forced to eat a giant slice of good ol’ humble pie.
At this moment in time, along with their regular high-tech chemical protection suits and detection equipment, soldiers have now been issued with simple clothes pegs in case of further stink bomb attacks.