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#1 - Cooking Bacon In the Nude.
Long a past-time of the Swedes, cooking bacon in the nude is renowned for it's obvious dangers to the chef. Sizzling fat crackles and pops it's way over the edge of the frying pan onto your naked skin, resulting in obscenities that would make a docker blush. End result - lovely bacon, crispy skin.
#2 - Making Tea Without Spilling Boiling Water.
We can send a man to the moon, we can fight off tropical diseases with magic pills, but we can't invent a kettle that doesn't spill boiling water over your kitchen surface. Yes, it's the age old problem of how to avoid being rushed to casualty whilst making a simple cup of tea.
#3 - Sour Milk.
You know how it goes. When the milkman comes, the new milk is put at the back of the fridge. Well I prefer a different system that interferes with other people that use the fridge. I like to put my milk at the front. This leads to a few pints of milk getting caught up in the tussle between getting used and going to the back of the fridge. Soon enough there's sure to be a shortage of milk in the house and some unwitting family member will open the bottle, only to be greeted with by funk of a thousand years!
#4 - Swapping Sugar for Salt.
The classic. Quite a lot of people have jars in their kitchen labelled "Sugar" and "Salt". For this challenge you'll need a third jar to hold either of the contents whilst they're being swapped. then sit back and watch your Dad spew his tea over his sunday papers!
#5 - The Cod in the Cupboard.
If you're anything like me, you'll no doubt have a few cod or kippers lying frozen in the bottom of your freezer. Take one of these fish and leave it at the back of a cupboard. After a few days a pungent odour will be noticable and the family will begin to wonder, "Hmmm, what's that smell? Is it the bins?". After about a week or so someone will stumble across the fish and the mystery will be solved...except you've left 4 more behind the cooker!
#6 - Swapping Porridge for Kitty Litter.
This one works best if the porridge-eater in your family has bad eyesight. The texture and sound that grit make when being poured is almost identical to that of porridge oats. then wait until morning and watch in glee as they chow down on lovely, hard, porridge "oats"!
#7 - The "I've won, I've won!" Challenge.
This works with any item of food that offers a secret prize inside. At night, whilst everyone's asleep, creep downstairs and open up your chosen item (preferably something that little Timmy has to take to school in his lunchbox). Then carefully insert a "prize winning" token with detailed instructions of how to claim his prize...little does he know that the phone number provided is for LadyBoysRUs in Bangkok!
#8 - The Blue-Nun Sting.
This one requires a bit of hard cash and planning. When one of your parents has his or her boss round for dinner, nip off to the off-license and replace all his expensive bottles of champagne with Blue-Nun! When the guests see the "expense" their host has gone too, they'll make their excuses and you can come out of the attic. A challenge of Terry and June proportions!
#9 - The Cookie Jar Handshake.
Fed up with greedy relatives pinching the last of the biscuits from the jar? Just put a mousetrap in there and wait or the fun to begin! Short but sweet.
#10 - A Recipe for Disaster.
This should really be twinned with #8 for maximum effect. Carefully remove pages from your Mum's favourite cook-book. That way she'll soon be cooking the delights of meat and jelly! Better yet, find a different recipe book with the same size pages and make your own. Like that bit in Friends, but with less canned laughter.
So there you have it - 10 challenges that should make the kitchen a more fun place to be. They range from tiny personal challenges to all out assaults on your family. Enjoy!
Long a past-time of the Swedes, cooking bacon in the nude is renowned for it's obvious dangers to the chef. Sizzling fat crackles and pops it's way over the edge of the frying pan onto your naked skin, resulting in obscenities that would make a docker blush. End result - lovely bacon, crispy skin.
#2 - Making Tea Without Spilling Boiling Water.
We can send a man to the moon, we can fight off tropical diseases with magic pills, but we can't invent a kettle that doesn't spill boiling water over your kitchen surface. Yes, it's the age old problem of how to avoid being rushed to casualty whilst making a simple cup of tea.
#3 - Sour Milk.
You know how it goes. When the milkman comes, the new milk is put at the back of the fridge. Well I prefer a different system that interferes with other people that use the fridge. I like to put my milk at the front. This leads to a few pints of milk getting caught up in the tussle between getting used and going to the back of the fridge. Soon enough there's sure to be a shortage of milk in the house and some unwitting family member will open the bottle, only to be greeted with by funk of a thousand years!
#4 - Swapping Sugar for Salt.
The classic. Quite a lot of people have jars in their kitchen labelled "Sugar" and "Salt". For this challenge you'll need a third jar to hold either of the contents whilst they're being swapped. then sit back and watch your Dad spew his tea over his sunday papers!
#5 - The Cod in the Cupboard.
If you're anything like me, you'll no doubt have a few cod or kippers lying frozen in the bottom of your freezer. Take one of these fish and leave it at the back of a cupboard. After a few days a pungent odour will be noticable and the family will begin to wonder, "Hmmm, what's that smell? Is it the bins?". After about a week or so someone will stumble across the fish and the mystery will be solved...except you've left 4 more behind the cooker!
#6 - Swapping Porridge for Kitty Litter.
This one works best if the porridge-eater in your family has bad eyesight. The texture and sound that grit make when being poured is almost identical to that of porridge oats. then wait until morning and watch in glee as they chow down on lovely, hard, porridge "oats"!
#7 - The "I've won, I've won!" Challenge.
This works with any item of food that offers a secret prize inside. At night, whilst everyone's asleep, creep downstairs and open up your chosen item (preferably something that little Timmy has to take to school in his lunchbox). Then carefully insert a "prize winning" token with detailed instructions of how to claim his prize...little does he know that the phone number provided is for LadyBoysRUs in Bangkok!
#8 - The Blue-Nun Sting.
This one requires a bit of hard cash and planning. When one of your parents has his or her boss round for dinner, nip off to the off-license and replace all his expensive bottles of champagne with Blue-Nun! When the guests see the "expense" their host has gone too, they'll make their excuses and you can come out of the attic. A challenge of Terry and June proportions!
#9 - The Cookie Jar Handshake.
Fed up with greedy relatives pinching the last of the biscuits from the jar? Just put a mousetrap in there and wait or the fun to begin! Short but sweet.
#10 - A Recipe for Disaster.
This should really be twinned with #8 for maximum effect. Carefully remove pages from your Mum's favourite cook-book. That way she'll soon be cooking the delights of meat and jelly! Better yet, find a different recipe book with the same size pages and make your own. Like that bit in Friends, but with less canned laughter.
So there you have it - 10 challenges that should make the kitchen a more fun place to be. They range from tiny personal challenges to all out assaults on your family. Enjoy!
Is this a thread about food?
Yes. Yes it is.
Yes. Yes it is.
#1 - Cooking Bacon In the Nude.
Long a past-time of the Swedes, cooking bacon in the nude is renowned for it's obvious dangers to the chef. Sizzling fat crackles and pops it's way over the edge of the frying pan onto your naked skin, resulting in obscenities that would make a docker blush. End result - lovely bacon, crispy skin.
#2 - Making Tea Without Spilling Boiling Water.
We can send a man to the moon, we can fight off tropical diseases with magic pills, but we can't invent a kettle that doesn't spill boiling water over your kitchen surface. Yes, it's the age old problem of how to avoid being rushed to casualty whilst making a simple cup of tea.
#3 - Sour Milk.
You know how it goes. When the milkman comes, the new milk is put at the back of the fridge. Well I prefer a different system that interferes with other people that use the fridge. I like to put my milk at the front. This leads to a few pints of milk getting caught up in the tussle between getting used and going to the back of the fridge. Soon enough there's sure to be a shortage of milk in the house and some unwitting family member will open the bottle, only to be greeted with by funk of a thousand years!
#4 - Swapping Sugar for Salt.
The classic. Quite a lot of people have jars in their kitchen labelled "Sugar" and "Salt". For this challenge you'll need a third jar to hold either of the contents whilst they're being swapped. then sit back and watch your Dad spew his tea over his sunday papers!
#5 - The Cod in the Cupboard.
If you're anything like me, you'll no doubt have a few cod or kippers lying frozen in the bottom of your freezer. Take one of these fish and leave it at the back of a cupboard. After a few days a pungent odour will be noticable and the family will begin to wonder, "Hmmm, what's that smell? Is it the bins?". After about a week or so someone will stumble across the fish and the mystery will be solved...except you've left 4 more behind the cooker!
#6 - Swapping Porridge for Kitty Litter.
This one works best if the porridge-eater in your family has bad eyesight. The texture and sound that grit make when being poured is almost identical to that of porridge oats. then wait until morning and watch in glee as they chow down on lovely, hard, porridge "oats"!
#7 - The "I've won, I've won!" Challenge.
This works with any item of food that offers a secret prize inside. At night, whilst everyone's asleep, creep downstairs and open up your chosen item (preferably something that little Timmy has to take to school in his lunchbox). Then carefully insert a "prize winning" token with detailed instructions of how to claim his prize...little does he know that the phone number provided is for LadyBoysRUs in Bangkok!
#8 - The Blue-Nun Sting.
This one requires a bit of hard cash and planning. When one of your parents has his or her boss round for dinner, nip off to the off-license and replace all his expensive bottles of champagne with Blue-Nun! When the guests see the "expense" their host has gone too, they'll make their excuses and you can come out of the attic. A challenge of Terry and June proportions!
#9 - The Cookie Jar Handshake.
Fed up with greedy relatives pinching the last of the biscuits from the jar? Just put a mousetrap in there and wait or the fun to begin! Short but sweet.
#10 - A Recipe for Disaster.
This should really be twinned with #8 for maximum effect. Carefully remove pages from your Mum's favourite cook-book. That way she'll soon be cooking the delights of meat and jelly! Better yet, find a different recipe book with the same size pages and make your own. Like that bit in Friends, but with less canned laughter.
So there you have it - 10 challenges that should make the kitchen a more fun place to be. They range from tiny personal challenges to all out assaults on your family. Enjoy!
Long a past-time of the Swedes, cooking bacon in the nude is renowned for it's obvious dangers to the chef. Sizzling fat crackles and pops it's way over the edge of the frying pan onto your naked skin, resulting in obscenities that would make a docker blush. End result - lovely bacon, crispy skin.
#2 - Making Tea Without Spilling Boiling Water.
We can send a man to the moon, we can fight off tropical diseases with magic pills, but we can't invent a kettle that doesn't spill boiling water over your kitchen surface. Yes, it's the age old problem of how to avoid being rushed to casualty whilst making a simple cup of tea.
#3 - Sour Milk.
You know how it goes. When the milkman comes, the new milk is put at the back of the fridge. Well I prefer a different system that interferes with other people that use the fridge. I like to put my milk at the front. This leads to a few pints of milk getting caught up in the tussle between getting used and going to the back of the fridge. Soon enough there's sure to be a shortage of milk in the house and some unwitting family member will open the bottle, only to be greeted with by funk of a thousand years!
#4 - Swapping Sugar for Salt.
The classic. Quite a lot of people have jars in their kitchen labelled "Sugar" and "Salt". For this challenge you'll need a third jar to hold either of the contents whilst they're being swapped. then sit back and watch your Dad spew his tea over his sunday papers!
#5 - The Cod in the Cupboard.
If you're anything like me, you'll no doubt have a few cod or kippers lying frozen in the bottom of your freezer. Take one of these fish and leave it at the back of a cupboard. After a few days a pungent odour will be noticable and the family will begin to wonder, "Hmmm, what's that smell? Is it the bins?". After about a week or so someone will stumble across the fish and the mystery will be solved...except you've left 4 more behind the cooker!
#6 - Swapping Porridge for Kitty Litter.
This one works best if the porridge-eater in your family has bad eyesight. The texture and sound that grit make when being poured is almost identical to that of porridge oats. then wait until morning and watch in glee as they chow down on lovely, hard, porridge "oats"!
#7 - The "I've won, I've won!" Challenge.
This works with any item of food that offers a secret prize inside. At night, whilst everyone's asleep, creep downstairs and open up your chosen item (preferably something that little Timmy has to take to school in his lunchbox). Then carefully insert a "prize winning" token with detailed instructions of how to claim his prize...little does he know that the phone number provided is for LadyBoysRUs in Bangkok!
#8 - The Blue-Nun Sting.
This one requires a bit of hard cash and planning. When one of your parents has his or her boss round for dinner, nip off to the off-license and replace all his expensive bottles of champagne with Blue-Nun! When the guests see the "expense" their host has gone too, they'll make their excuses and you can come out of the attic. A challenge of Terry and June proportions!
#9 - The Cookie Jar Handshake.
Fed up with greedy relatives pinching the last of the biscuits from the jar? Just put a mousetrap in there and wait or the fun to begin! Short but sweet.
#10 - A Recipe for Disaster.
This should really be twinned with #8 for maximum effect. Carefully remove pages from your Mum's favourite cook-book. That way she'll soon be cooking the delights of meat and jelly! Better yet, find a different recipe book with the same size pages and make your own. Like that bit in Friends, but with less canned laughter.
So there you have it - 10 challenges that should make the kitchen a more fun place to be. They range from tiny personal challenges to all out assaults on your family. Enjoy!