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The is not a more wretched network of scum and villainy that the roads of the UK, that is why the Jedi must take extreme caution when using them. The Highway Code is there to help us in our travels, but every now and then Jedi powers can be used to make journeys a little easier.
In the first instance of trouble mind control techniques should be used. For instance, should you find yourself stuck behind a cyclist that is refusing to move over to the cycle lane, why not just call out to them "This road is not safe. You do not want to cycle here. The cycle lane is what you are looking for." With this they should move over, letting you pass.
Unfortunately mind-control techniques do not tend to be able to penetrate cars, as the drivers cannot hear you, so should you find yourself stuck at the end of a junction, waiting to pull out remember that the force is a part of everything. You can use your power to pull down a tree into the road, stopping the traffic and allowing you to move out safely. Either that or you could simply use the power of the force to hold back the traffic. This is a little more risky, given that the car is moving forward a t quite a rate, and should you let off your control for a moment the gap will quickly disappear.
Perhaps on a visit to the shops you may find a traffic warden trying to give you a ticket. You're a Jedi Knight, you don't want a parking fine, sort it out! Mind control would work in this case, but come on, they're traffic wardens, why not use a force choke on them instead? What could be more satisfying than choking the life out of a traffic warden, without even touching him?
Road rage is an all too common occurrence on UK roads, so you have to remain calm. Should a fellow road user become annoyed at your use of the force to pull out into the road, and confront you, the situation can be easily dealt with using the Jedi mind tricks. When he approaches your vehicle, crowbar in hand ready to smash your skull in simply say "This is not the vehicle you are looking for. I am a good driver" Then the ape will become confused, and take out his frustration elsewhere.
However, should someone cut you up, that's a very different story. Tune into the Dark Side and blow their car up with a touch of force lightning. Alternatively, should you desire a little more exercise, why not give chase to them? Jump out of your car, and on top of other vehicles until you reach the offender. Then you can carve up the top of their car with your light-sabre, pull them out, and give them a warning to drive more carefully in future.
So take to those roads prepared for the worst, but more than ready to deal with it. Safe journey Jedi!
In the first instance of trouble mind control techniques should be used. For instance, should you find yourself stuck behind a cyclist that is refusing to move over to the cycle lane, why not just call out to them "This road is not safe. You do not want to cycle here. The cycle lane is what you are looking for." With this they should move over, letting you pass.
Unfortunately mind-control techniques do not tend to be able to penetrate cars, as the drivers cannot hear you, so should you find yourself stuck at the end of a junction, waiting to pull out remember that the force is a part of everything. You can use your power to pull down a tree into the road, stopping the traffic and allowing you to move out safely. Either that or you could simply use the power of the force to hold back the traffic. This is a little more risky, given that the car is moving forward a t quite a rate, and should you let off your control for a moment the gap will quickly disappear.
Perhaps on a visit to the shops you may find a traffic warden trying to give you a ticket. You're a Jedi Knight, you don't want a parking fine, sort it out! Mind control would work in this case, but come on, they're traffic wardens, why not use a force choke on them instead? What could be more satisfying than choking the life out of a traffic warden, without even touching him?
Road rage is an all too common occurrence on UK roads, so you have to remain calm. Should a fellow road user become annoyed at your use of the force to pull out into the road, and confront you, the situation can be easily dealt with using the Jedi mind tricks. When he approaches your vehicle, crowbar in hand ready to smash your skull in simply say "This is not the vehicle you are looking for. I am a good driver" Then the ape will become confused, and take out his frustration elsewhere.
However, should someone cut you up, that's a very different story. Tune into the Dark Side and blow their car up with a touch of force lightning. Alternatively, should you desire a little more exercise, why not give chase to them? Jump out of your car, and on top of other vehicles until you reach the offender. Then you can carve up the top of their car with your light-sabre, pull them out, and give them a warning to drive more carefully in future.
So take to those roads prepared for the worst, but more than ready to deal with it. Safe journey Jedi!
Yeah, excellent work!
Only just had time to read this. Very amusing.
Excellent stuff, keep the Jedi guides coming
I came, I saw, I pondered.
I read this.
It was very nice.
It was very nice.
True.
(True=pop)
(True=pop)
Thanks Ant = Pop
(I've been there, I know)
(I've been there, I know)
Thanks Ant.
Highly amusing stuff Meka.
Favourite part was the force choke on the traffic warden. :D
Favourite part was the force choke on the traffic warden. :D
The is not a more wretched network of scum and villainy that the roads of the UK, that is why the Jedi must take extreme caution when using them. The Highway Code is there to help us in our travels, but every now and then Jedi powers can be used to make journeys a little easier.
In the first instance of trouble mind control techniques should be used. For instance, should you find yourself stuck behind a cyclist that is refusing to move over to the cycle lane, why not just call out to them "This road is not safe. You do not want to cycle here. The cycle lane is what you are looking for." With this they should move over, letting you pass.
Unfortunately mind-control techniques do not tend to be able to penetrate cars, as the drivers cannot hear you, so should you find yourself stuck at the end of a junction, waiting to pull out remember that the force is a part of everything. You can use your power to pull down a tree into the road, stopping the traffic and allowing you to move out safely. Either that or you could simply use the power of the force to hold back the traffic. This is a little more risky, given that the car is moving forward a t quite a rate, and should you let off your control for a moment the gap will quickly disappear.
Perhaps on a visit to the shops you may find a traffic warden trying to give you a ticket. You're a Jedi Knight, you don't want a parking fine, sort it out! Mind control would work in this case, but come on, they're traffic wardens, why not use a force choke on them instead? What could be more satisfying than choking the life out of a traffic warden, without even touching him?
Road rage is an all too common occurrence on UK roads, so you have to remain calm. Should a fellow road user become annoyed at your use of the force to pull out into the road, and confront you, the situation can be easily dealt with using the Jedi mind tricks. When he approaches your vehicle, crowbar in hand ready to smash your skull in simply say "This is not the vehicle you are looking for. I am a good driver" Then the ape will become confused, and take out his frustration elsewhere.
However, should someone cut you up, that's a very different story. Tune into the Dark Side and blow their car up with a touch of force lightning. Alternatively, should you desire a little more exercise, why not give chase to them? Jump out of your car, and on top of other vehicles until you reach the offender. Then you can carve up the top of their car with your light-sabre, pull them out, and give them a warning to drive more carefully in future.
So take to those roads prepared for the worst, but more than ready to deal with it. Safe journey Jedi!
In the first instance of trouble mind control techniques should be used. For instance, should you find yourself stuck behind a cyclist that is refusing to move over to the cycle lane, why not just call out to them "This road is not safe. You do not want to cycle here. The cycle lane is what you are looking for." With this they should move over, letting you pass.
Unfortunately mind-control techniques do not tend to be able to penetrate cars, as the drivers cannot hear you, so should you find yourself stuck at the end of a junction, waiting to pull out remember that the force is a part of everything. You can use your power to pull down a tree into the road, stopping the traffic and allowing you to move out safely. Either that or you could simply use the power of the force to hold back the traffic. This is a little more risky, given that the car is moving forward a t quite a rate, and should you let off your control for a moment the gap will quickly disappear.
Perhaps on a visit to the shops you may find a traffic warden trying to give you a ticket. You're a Jedi Knight, you don't want a parking fine, sort it out! Mind control would work in this case, but come on, they're traffic wardens, why not use a force choke on them instead? What could be more satisfying than choking the life out of a traffic warden, without even touching him?
Road rage is an all too common occurrence on UK roads, so you have to remain calm. Should a fellow road user become annoyed at your use of the force to pull out into the road, and confront you, the situation can be easily dealt with using the Jedi mind tricks. When he approaches your vehicle, crowbar in hand ready to smash your skull in simply say "This is not the vehicle you are looking for. I am a good driver" Then the ape will become confused, and take out his frustration elsewhere.
However, should someone cut you up, that's a very different story. Tune into the Dark Side and blow their car up with a touch of force lightning. Alternatively, should you desire a little more exercise, why not give chase to them? Jump out of your car, and on top of other vehicles until you reach the offender. Then you can carve up the top of their car with your light-sabre, pull them out, and give them a warning to drive more carefully in future.
So take to those roads prepared for the worst, but more than ready to deal with it. Safe journey Jedi!