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For the past couple of weeks I've had my head in an assessed essay for uni.
Partly because it's not one of my better subjects, partly because the question doesn't seem to give much scope for intelligence, I know that despite quite a bit of work my finished piece is going to be thoroughly lame and lacking in anything resembling heart, passion or even interest.
Not sure how the mark will work out, I guess it'll depend on how much of the lameness was down to the question and how much was down to myself.
But I hate that feeling, knowing you're producing something of fairly dire quality, by your own standards, but also knowing that it's the best you've been able to manage.
Not trying doesn't feel this bad. At least you can tell yourself, even if it's bs, that you're capable of doing well.
But when you know you've given your best and you still suck, that's not somewhere I like to be.
Just wanted to get it off my chest really.
Apart from the obvious (though failry diruted) effct on my degree grade, I guess the importance is just down to wanting to be good at stuff.
But is that so wrong?
Partly because it's not one of my better subjects, partly because the question doesn't seem to give much scope for intelligence, I know that despite quite a bit of work my finished piece is going to be thoroughly lame and lacking in anything resembling heart, passion or even interest.
Not sure how the mark will work out, I guess it'll depend on how much of the lameness was down to the question and how much was down to myself.
But I hate that feeling, knowing you're producing something of fairly dire quality, by your own standards, but also knowing that it's the best you've been able to manage.
Not trying doesn't feel this bad. At least you can tell yourself, even if it's bs, that you're capable of doing well.
But when you know you've given your best and you still suck, that's not somewhere I like to be.
Just wanted to get it off my chest really.
Apart from the obvious (though failry diruted) effct on my degree grade, I guess the importance is just down to wanting to be good at stuff.
But is that so wrong?
I know what you mean as well. I've got this original writing essay coming up for English Language at college and i just know it's gonna be average. Not good, not bad....just average.
The GingerLord wrote:
> When I was at college I did Double Maths
> A-Level (don't ask!).
Heh. I took that too. And yep, the later pure (and some stats *shudders* regression lines cost me a grand. Literally. Maybe.) modules really weren't fun :^)
I usually forget about most essays as soon as I finish them, but I think this time I'll try to make an exception.
> When I was at college I did Double Maths
> A-Level (don't ask!).
Heh. I took that too. And yep, the later pure (and some stats *shudders* regression lines cost me a grand. Literally. Maybe.) modules really weren't fun :^)
I usually forget about most essays as soon as I finish them, but I think this time I'll try to make an exception.
I know EXACTLY how you feel. When I was at college I did Double Maths A-Level (don't ask!). Now, I know I'm not stupid, I'm at a good university and got the placement year everyone wanted, but I was way out of my depth in this class. Just plainly not good enough. For Pure Maths 5 I got 9/70!!!
But its how you handle it that's important. Take your mark, talk to your tutor and find out how you improve, work on that, and then next time, make sure you do better. I came out with an 'A' and a 'C' for Maths, and the most satisfying grade of my A-Levels was that 'C' in Further Maths. Sometimes its the hardest work that is the most gratifying.
Good luck!
GL
But its how you handle it that's important. Take your mark, talk to your tutor and find out how you improve, work on that, and then next time, make sure you do better. I came out with an 'A' and a 'C' for Maths, and the most satisfying grade of my A-Levels was that 'C' in Further Maths. Sometimes its the hardest work that is the most gratifying.
Good luck!
GL
For the past couple of weeks I've had my head in an assessed essay for uni.
Partly because it's not one of my better subjects, partly because the question doesn't seem to give much scope for intelligence, I know that despite quite a bit of work my finished piece is going to be thoroughly lame and lacking in anything resembling heart, passion or even interest.
Not sure how the mark will work out, I guess it'll depend on how much of the lameness was down to the question and how much was down to myself.
But I hate that feeling, knowing you're producing something of fairly dire quality, by your own standards, but also knowing that it's the best you've been able to manage.
Not trying doesn't feel this bad. At least you can tell yourself, even if it's bs, that you're capable of doing well.
But when you know you've given your best and you still suck, that's not somewhere I like to be.
Just wanted to get it off my chest really.
Apart from the obvious (though failry diruted) effct on my degree grade, I guess the importance is just down to wanting to be good at stuff.
But is that so wrong?
Partly because it's not one of my better subjects, partly because the question doesn't seem to give much scope for intelligence, I know that despite quite a bit of work my finished piece is going to be thoroughly lame and lacking in anything resembling heart, passion or even interest.
Not sure how the mark will work out, I guess it'll depend on how much of the lameness was down to the question and how much was down to myself.
But I hate that feeling, knowing you're producing something of fairly dire quality, by your own standards, but also knowing that it's the best you've been able to manage.
Not trying doesn't feel this bad. At least you can tell yourself, even if it's bs, that you're capable of doing well.
But when you know you've given your best and you still suck, that's not somewhere I like to be.
Just wanted to get it off my chest really.
Apart from the obvious (though failry diruted) effct on my degree grade, I guess the importance is just down to wanting to be good at stuff.
But is that so wrong?