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I. WALKIN' THE doG
He tripped, fell down, got up, then walked a bit further. He tripped, fell down, got up, then walked a bit further. He tripped, fell down, got up, then walked a bit further. He tripped, and fell down. - His dog glanced back, sighed, reached into his jacket pocket, pawed out some tobacco and a pipe, stuffed it, lit it, inhaled, blew out a smoke ring, then said: "When are you going to learn to tie your bloody shoelaces?!"
II. COUNTRY JIG
After winning the local arm-wrestling contest with the help of a spike deviously concealed in my palm, I rounded up a bunch of unruly yobs and organized a free-for-all on the village green. Then, as the riot ensued, I embarked on a sly looting spree.
From Stern Sidney Sideface the grumbling cobbler, I stole a lucky horseshoe.
From Old Fabian Starseeker the eccentric astromoner of Lofty Summit, I pilfered a book entitled "The Setting of Booby Traps for Unwary Hogs".
From Rosey O'Moon the local lovely, I slipped into my deep pocket an amulet given to her by Liam Firesword the district wolf.
And from Old Ma Tickle's house, I spirited away a huge cherry pie, which I gorged on at my journey's end.
III. THE 16 RULES OF HIGH TOMFOOLERY [according to Nathaniel Hoodwink, the Notorious Riddler of Juggler's Keep]
1. In the beginning, greet your victim with a dark and unsolvable puzzle.
2. Prowl, bushwhack and vamoose.
3. Always consider mirrors, smokes and lights.
4. Out-jockey your opponent with advanced plays and twinkling manoeuvres.
5. Bombard all ears present with an endless stream of ecstatic gobbledegook.
6. By the light of Old Rusty [the moon], startle your foe with subtle shadow-lore.
7. Engage at all times in chicken-hearted tactics.
8. Always employ a nimble gay counter-ruse.
9. Be sure to utilize a loathsome and dwimmer-crafty device.
10. Sing a nauseating rhyme of ghastly intent.
11. Take your trusty cane and mortify your victim with a disply of agile staffcraft.
12. Strut with the arrogant swagger of a cocky-know-all.
13. If your adversary has a whippersnapper in his service, take him hostage.
14. Always remember to flabbergast your foe with gibberish and double-talk.
15. If the opportunity arises, recite the incantation of Old Man Chuckle.
16. And finally, if events are turning ill - set your rival's breeches aflame!
I can't sleep :-(
He tripped, fell down, got up, then walked a bit further. He tripped, fell down, got up, then walked a bit further. He tripped, fell down, got up, then walked a bit further. He tripped, and fell down. - His dog glanced back, sighed, reached into his jacket pocket, pawed out some tobacco and a pipe, stuffed it, lit it, inhaled, blew out a smoke ring, then said: "When are you going to learn to tie your bloody shoelaces?!"
II. COUNTRY JIG
After winning the local arm-wrestling contest with the help of a spike deviously concealed in my palm, I rounded up a bunch of unruly yobs and organized a free-for-all on the village green. Then, as the riot ensued, I embarked on a sly looting spree.
From Stern Sidney Sideface the grumbling cobbler, I stole a lucky horseshoe.
From Old Fabian Starseeker the eccentric astromoner of Lofty Summit, I pilfered a book entitled "The Setting of Booby Traps for Unwary Hogs".
From Rosey O'Moon the local lovely, I slipped into my deep pocket an amulet given to her by Liam Firesword the district wolf.
And from Old Ma Tickle's house, I spirited away a huge cherry pie, which I gorged on at my journey's end.
III. THE 16 RULES OF HIGH TOMFOOLERY [according to Nathaniel Hoodwink, the Notorious Riddler of Juggler's Keep]
1. In the beginning, greet your victim with a dark and unsolvable puzzle.
2. Prowl, bushwhack and vamoose.
3. Always consider mirrors, smokes and lights.
4. Out-jockey your opponent with advanced plays and twinkling manoeuvres.
5. Bombard all ears present with an endless stream of ecstatic gobbledegook.
6. By the light of Old Rusty [the moon], startle your foe with subtle shadow-lore.
7. Engage at all times in chicken-hearted tactics.
8. Always employ a nimble gay counter-ruse.
9. Be sure to utilize a loathsome and dwimmer-crafty device.
10. Sing a nauseating rhyme of ghastly intent.
11. Take your trusty cane and mortify your victim with a disply of agile staffcraft.
12. Strut with the arrogant swagger of a cocky-know-all.
13. If your adversary has a whippersnapper in his service, take him hostage.
14. Always remember to flabbergast your foe with gibberish and double-talk.
15. If the opportunity arises, recite the incantation of Old Man Chuckle.
16. And finally, if events are turning ill - set your rival's breeches aflame!
I can't sleep :-(
I'd like to read these synopsis out to those people on that BBC 2 discussion show, where reviewers hate anything that isn't bleak Hungarian melancholy. Then I'd get their opinions whether they want to read the book.
"Always employ a nimble gay counter-ruse."
You know that might just work (unlike Barrymore who'll never work again).
"Always employ a nimble gay counter-ruse."
You know that might just work (unlike Barrymore who'll never work again).
I. WALKIN' THE doG
He tripped, fell down, got up, then walked a bit further. He tripped, fell down, got up, then walked a bit further. He tripped, fell down, got up, then walked a bit further. He tripped, and fell down. - His dog glanced back, sighed, reached into his jacket pocket, pawed out some tobacco and a pipe, stuffed it, lit it, inhaled, blew out a smoke ring, then said: "When are you going to learn to tie your bloody shoelaces?!"
II. COUNTRY JIG
After winning the local arm-wrestling contest with the help of a spike deviously concealed in my palm, I rounded up a bunch of unruly yobs and organized a free-for-all on the village green. Then, as the riot ensued, I embarked on a sly looting spree.
From Stern Sidney Sideface the grumbling cobbler, I stole a lucky horseshoe.
From Old Fabian Starseeker the eccentric astromoner of Lofty Summit, I pilfered a book entitled "The Setting of Booby Traps for Unwary Hogs".
From Rosey O'Moon the local lovely, I slipped into my deep pocket an amulet given to her by Liam Firesword the district wolf.
And from Old Ma Tickle's house, I spirited away a huge cherry pie, which I gorged on at my journey's end.
III. THE 16 RULES OF HIGH TOMFOOLERY [according to Nathaniel Hoodwink, the Notorious Riddler of Juggler's Keep]
1. In the beginning, greet your victim with a dark and unsolvable puzzle.
2. Prowl, bushwhack and vamoose.
3. Always consider mirrors, smokes and lights.
4. Out-jockey your opponent with advanced plays and twinkling manoeuvres.
5. Bombard all ears present with an endless stream of ecstatic gobbledegook.
6. By the light of Old Rusty [the moon], startle your foe with subtle shadow-lore.
7. Engage at all times in chicken-hearted tactics.
8. Always employ a nimble gay counter-ruse.
9. Be sure to utilize a loathsome and dwimmer-crafty device.
10. Sing a nauseating rhyme of ghastly intent.
11. Take your trusty cane and mortify your victim with a disply of agile staffcraft.
12. Strut with the arrogant swagger of a cocky-know-all.
13. If your adversary has a whippersnapper in his service, take him hostage.
14. Always remember to flabbergast your foe with gibberish and double-talk.
15. If the opportunity arises, recite the incantation of Old Man Chuckle.
16. And finally, if events are turning ill - set your rival's breeches aflame!
I can't sleep :-(
He tripped, fell down, got up, then walked a bit further. He tripped, fell down, got up, then walked a bit further. He tripped, fell down, got up, then walked a bit further. He tripped, and fell down. - His dog glanced back, sighed, reached into his jacket pocket, pawed out some tobacco and a pipe, stuffed it, lit it, inhaled, blew out a smoke ring, then said: "When are you going to learn to tie your bloody shoelaces?!"
II. COUNTRY JIG
After winning the local arm-wrestling contest with the help of a spike deviously concealed in my palm, I rounded up a bunch of unruly yobs and organized a free-for-all on the village green. Then, as the riot ensued, I embarked on a sly looting spree.
From Stern Sidney Sideface the grumbling cobbler, I stole a lucky horseshoe.
From Old Fabian Starseeker the eccentric astromoner of Lofty Summit, I pilfered a book entitled "The Setting of Booby Traps for Unwary Hogs".
From Rosey O'Moon the local lovely, I slipped into my deep pocket an amulet given to her by Liam Firesword the district wolf.
And from Old Ma Tickle's house, I spirited away a huge cherry pie, which I gorged on at my journey's end.
III. THE 16 RULES OF HIGH TOMFOOLERY [according to Nathaniel Hoodwink, the Notorious Riddler of Juggler's Keep]
1. In the beginning, greet your victim with a dark and unsolvable puzzle.
2. Prowl, bushwhack and vamoose.
3. Always consider mirrors, smokes and lights.
4. Out-jockey your opponent with advanced plays and twinkling manoeuvres.
5. Bombard all ears present with an endless stream of ecstatic gobbledegook.
6. By the light of Old Rusty [the moon], startle your foe with subtle shadow-lore.
7. Engage at all times in chicken-hearted tactics.
8. Always employ a nimble gay counter-ruse.
9. Be sure to utilize a loathsome and dwimmer-crafty device.
10. Sing a nauseating rhyme of ghastly intent.
11. Take your trusty cane and mortify your victim with a disply of agile staffcraft.
12. Strut with the arrogant swagger of a cocky-know-all.
13. If your adversary has a whippersnapper in his service, take him hostage.
14. Always remember to flabbergast your foe with gibberish and double-talk.
15. If the opportunity arises, recite the incantation of Old Man Chuckle.
16. And finally, if events are turning ill - set your rival's breeches aflame!
I can't sleep :-(