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With no celebrity funeral for half a decade to propel Elton John to the number one spot in the UK charts, he's had to do the unthinkable, much like Lulu and Take That before him, and team up with Blue. I hope he's very pleased with himself, aligning himself with the worst in dire pop, bought only because Dunc showed his bum in Smash Hits (alleged) but it could have started an awful run of dire collaborations, worse than the time Sting and Pato Banton got together to follow your, follow your, follow your guiding star.
'H' from Steps and 'Suggs' from Madness
H thinks he's funny, he won Smash Hits awards for it, or something. Suggs thinks he's funny, because he used to move his knees in a wacky manner, and make funny faces in his music videos. These two would be great together, in an incredibly naff wacky song kind of way. They'd have to be on stage together you see, and one tragic accident could maim the pair of them.
Gareth Gates and the Bee Gees
When GG met the BeeGees. I can see the laughter now. And the stuttering. I can also see the brothers Gibb making the pop Muppet dance by pulling the strings of the marketing machine that has realised that these TV pop acts are liked cloned sheep, and they just don't last. Milk it quickly, and book them into a drying out clinic whilst the world forgets.
Atomic Kitten and Phil Collins
They do love their cover versions, Tommy-K, but what if they wanted one of Phil Collins songs? Perhaps he'd like to rise from obscurity for a few weeks, and appear on SMTV with the Kittens, and pretend they're all buddies, when secretly he wants to pull out their voice boxes and replace them with dynamite. Then play with himself over their remaining chunks of flesh.
Westlife and Cliff Richard
It is quite possible that this would be the worst single in the history of time ever, even if the Cheeky Girls and Whigfield did a cover of Joe Dolci's Shaddapa Ya Face, it would be better than anything that good old Cliff and the dregs of the Oirish pop barrel could roll out. Unless they covered Joe Dolci.
Blazin' Squad and Boy George
They could cover Karma Chameleon, only by the time you'd explained to them the meaning of the words Karma, and Chameleon, and explained that it doesn't make a 'ch' sound like chips, but 'ch' like 'choir' one of the little runts would have done a bunk with Boy George’s wardrobe, and one of the others would have re-written the lyrics to "Red gold and bling"
S Club Juniors and Jonathan King
If it is possible to mess up the lives of 8 children anymore than plucking them from their schools and writing songs for them and making them famous, then getting bored and leaving them with no education, then it's this.
'H' from Steps and 'Suggs' from Madness
H thinks he's funny, he won Smash Hits awards for it, or something. Suggs thinks he's funny, because he used to move his knees in a wacky manner, and make funny faces in his music videos. These two would be great together, in an incredibly naff wacky song kind of way. They'd have to be on stage together you see, and one tragic accident could maim the pair of them.
Gareth Gates and the Bee Gees
When GG met the BeeGees. I can see the laughter now. And the stuttering. I can also see the brothers Gibb making the pop Muppet dance by pulling the strings of the marketing machine that has realised that these TV pop acts are liked cloned sheep, and they just don't last. Milk it quickly, and book them into a drying out clinic whilst the world forgets.
Atomic Kitten and Phil Collins
They do love their cover versions, Tommy-K, but what if they wanted one of Phil Collins songs? Perhaps he'd like to rise from obscurity for a few weeks, and appear on SMTV with the Kittens, and pretend they're all buddies, when secretly he wants to pull out their voice boxes and replace them with dynamite. Then play with himself over their remaining chunks of flesh.
Westlife and Cliff Richard
It is quite possible that this would be the worst single in the history of time ever, even if the Cheeky Girls and Whigfield did a cover of Joe Dolci's Shaddapa Ya Face, it would be better than anything that good old Cliff and the dregs of the Oirish pop barrel could roll out. Unless they covered Joe Dolci.
Blazin' Squad and Boy George
They could cover Karma Chameleon, only by the time you'd explained to them the meaning of the words Karma, and Chameleon, and explained that it doesn't make a 'ch' sound like chips, but 'ch' like 'choir' one of the little runts would have done a bunk with Boy George’s wardrobe, and one of the others would have re-written the lyrics to "Red gold and bling"
S Club Juniors and Jonathan King
If it is possible to mess up the lives of 8 children anymore than plucking them from their schools and writing songs for them and making them famous, then getting bored and leaving them with no education, then it's this.
Meka wrote>
> Cheeky Girls and Whigfield did a cover of Joe Dolci's Shaddapa Ya Face
lol!
> Cheeky Girls and Whigfield did a cover of Joe Dolci's Shaddapa Ya Face
lol!
Elton has been messing his songs up for a while now. Special editions with opera singers making wailing noises, new versions of his own songs 'jazzed up' and collaborations with dodgy boy bands.
Perhaps the wigs have done something to his head...must be the glue...
Perhaps the wigs have done something to his head...must be the glue...
Meka Dragon wrote:
S Club Juniors and Jonathan King
If it is possible to mess up the lives of 8 children anymore than
plucking them from their schools and writing songs for them and making
them famous, then getting bored and leaving them with no education,
then it's this.
Topical, yet hilarious. Crikey, a good day for mirth-inducing posts today.
S Club Juniors and Jonathan King
If it is possible to mess up the lives of 8 children anymore than
plucking them from their schools and writing songs for them and making
them famous, then getting bored and leaving them with no education,
then it's this.
Topical, yet hilarious. Crikey, a good day for mirth-inducing posts today.
With no celebrity funeral for half a decade to propel Elton John to the number one spot in the UK charts, he's had to do the unthinkable, much like Lulu and Take That before him, and team up with Blue. I hope he's very pleased with himself, aligning himself with the worst in dire pop, bought only because Dunc showed his bum in Smash Hits (alleged) but it could have started an awful run of dire collaborations, worse than the time Sting and Pato Banton got together to follow your, follow your, follow your guiding star.
'H' from Steps and 'Suggs' from Madness
H thinks he's funny, he won Smash Hits awards for it, or something. Suggs thinks he's funny, because he used to move his knees in a wacky manner, and make funny faces in his music videos. These two would be great together, in an incredibly naff wacky song kind of way. They'd have to be on stage together you see, and one tragic accident could maim the pair of them.
Gareth Gates and the Bee Gees
When GG met the BeeGees. I can see the laughter now. And the stuttering. I can also see the brothers Gibb making the pop Muppet dance by pulling the strings of the marketing machine that has realised that these TV pop acts are liked cloned sheep, and they just don't last. Milk it quickly, and book them into a drying out clinic whilst the world forgets.
Atomic Kitten and Phil Collins
They do love their cover versions, Tommy-K, but what if they wanted one of Phil Collins songs? Perhaps he'd like to rise from obscurity for a few weeks, and appear on SMTV with the Kittens, and pretend they're all buddies, when secretly he wants to pull out their voice boxes and replace them with dynamite. Then play with himself over their remaining chunks of flesh.
Westlife and Cliff Richard
It is quite possible that this would be the worst single in the history of time ever, even if the Cheeky Girls and Whigfield did a cover of Joe Dolci's Shaddapa Ya Face, it would be better than anything that good old Cliff and the dregs of the Oirish pop barrel could roll out. Unless they covered Joe Dolci.
Blazin' Squad and Boy George
They could cover Karma Chameleon, only by the time you'd explained to them the meaning of the words Karma, and Chameleon, and explained that it doesn't make a 'ch' sound like chips, but 'ch' like 'choir' one of the little runts would have done a bunk with Boy George’s wardrobe, and one of the others would have re-written the lyrics to "Red gold and bling"
S Club Juniors and Jonathan King
If it is possible to mess up the lives of 8 children anymore than plucking them from their schools and writing songs for them and making them famous, then getting bored and leaving them with no education, then it's this.
'H' from Steps and 'Suggs' from Madness
H thinks he's funny, he won Smash Hits awards for it, or something. Suggs thinks he's funny, because he used to move his knees in a wacky manner, and make funny faces in his music videos. These two would be great together, in an incredibly naff wacky song kind of way. They'd have to be on stage together you see, and one tragic accident could maim the pair of them.
Gareth Gates and the Bee Gees
When GG met the BeeGees. I can see the laughter now. And the stuttering. I can also see the brothers Gibb making the pop Muppet dance by pulling the strings of the marketing machine that has realised that these TV pop acts are liked cloned sheep, and they just don't last. Milk it quickly, and book them into a drying out clinic whilst the world forgets.
Atomic Kitten and Phil Collins
They do love their cover versions, Tommy-K, but what if they wanted one of Phil Collins songs? Perhaps he'd like to rise from obscurity for a few weeks, and appear on SMTV with the Kittens, and pretend they're all buddies, when secretly he wants to pull out their voice boxes and replace them with dynamite. Then play with himself over their remaining chunks of flesh.
Westlife and Cliff Richard
It is quite possible that this would be the worst single in the history of time ever, even if the Cheeky Girls and Whigfield did a cover of Joe Dolci's Shaddapa Ya Face, it would be better than anything that good old Cliff and the dregs of the Oirish pop barrel could roll out. Unless they covered Joe Dolci.
Blazin' Squad and Boy George
They could cover Karma Chameleon, only by the time you'd explained to them the meaning of the words Karma, and Chameleon, and explained that it doesn't make a 'ch' sound like chips, but 'ch' like 'choir' one of the little runts would have done a bunk with Boy George’s wardrobe, and one of the others would have re-written the lyrics to "Red gold and bling"
S Club Juniors and Jonathan King
If it is possible to mess up the lives of 8 children anymore than plucking them from their schools and writing songs for them and making them famous, then getting bored and leaving them with no education, then it's this.