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Because he's got 2 new CDs out and they rock, just a quick recap of his most popular material that, 8years after his death, still bears relevance:
"The Gulf War. Ok first of all, and this needs to be said, there never was a war. How can you say that Bill? Well, war is when *two* armies are fighting. So you can see right there, wasn't exactly a war. Remember how CNN talked about 'The Elite Republican Guard' in hushed tones like they were the bogeymen?
"Yeah we're doing well but we have yet to meet....The Elite Republican Guard", like these guys are 10ft tall Desert Warriors (stomps around stage) “We s##t bullets”. Yeah well…after two months of continuous carpet bombing and not one response from these people, they went from the “Elite Republican Guard” to the “Republican Guard”. Not nearly as Elite as we may have led you to believe. And after another 3 weeks of bombing, they went from “The Elite Republican Guard” to “The Republican Guard” to “The Republican’s made this s### up about there even being guards out there in the 1st place, we hope you enjoyed your firework show”
Obviously the worst thing about The Persian Gulf Distraction was the disparity and the casualties. Iraq 170,000, America…79. I’ll go over those numbers once again, they’re a little baffling at first. Iraq 170,000, America?....79. Wow…does that mean if we had sent over 80 guys, we still would have won that thing? Just 1 guy in a ticker-tape parade, “Hey I did it, it was all me”.
Y’see , I was in the un-envious position of being for the war but against the troops. Those guys were in hog-heaven man, great big weapons catalogue open, beer in hand:
“What’s G13 do Tommy?”
“Says here it destroys everything but the fillings in their teeth and helps us pay for the war effort”
”Well shoot, pull that one up”
“Pull up G13”
(makes whooshing noise and pauses…pauses…pauses)
Ka-boom
“…Cool! What’s G14?”
And Bush man, turned into a ####ing demon. Unsurprisingly. It’s not that I disagree with his foreign policy or domestic agenda, it’s that I think he’s a child of Satan let loose to destroy the planet…yeah…I’m a little to the left on this issue. He labeled the suicide bombers as cowardly. Cowardly? Hey, I don’t agree with these idiots thinking they got a guest-list to Nirvana by blowing themselves up like some piñata, but it aint cowardly. They kill themselves for a belief and we launch cruise missiles from giant floating iron islands 3000 miles away. Say what you want about their issues man, but it ain’t cowardly.
But yet again, CNN blew it all out of proportion man…I was listening to Saddam on CNN and he said “I do not want a war, I just want to see George Bush’s head kicked down the street like a football” and I thought….wow that’s odd ‘cos, that’s exactly what I was thinking! Who’d a thunk it? Me and Saddam are this close man!
Y’see, there is an easy option to this thing man. *We* should have assassinated Bush and said “That’s how you do it, don’t ### with us towel heads”. And, y’know…if Bush had died, there would have been NO loss of innocent life.
Really? You doubt that? You think I’m some sorta Commie huh? Ok, well…look at this way. All those military advisors on CNN “Iraq? Incredible weapons, incredible.” “How do you know? They wouldn’t let inspectors in?” “Heh…well…we looked at the receipt”
Come on man, that country doesn’t even have a swimming pool, where they gonna go buy weapons from huh? And what’s weird is your newspapers said you sold them “machine tools”. Your Orwellian language not withstanding, it’s a gun. That’s a machine and a tool. Machine Tool. But our papers said we sold them “Farming equipment”. Hahahaha, farming equipment! Sure ok, I’ll bite…what equipment?
“Ah well…the ah…flame throwing rake”
“There are no trees in Iraq you liar”
“Ok well…ah…oh, oh the armed tractor! No wait though, he’s a Hitler and here’s a foetus and if you disagree then you’re anti-America!”
No, I’m just anti-human. There *is* a difference.
"The Gulf War. Ok first of all, and this needs to be said, there never was a war. How can you say that Bill? Well, war is when *two* armies are fighting. So you can see right there, wasn't exactly a war. Remember how CNN talked about 'The Elite Republican Guard' in hushed tones like they were the bogeymen?
"Yeah we're doing well but we have yet to meet....The Elite Republican Guard", like these guys are 10ft tall Desert Warriors (stomps around stage) “We s##t bullets”. Yeah well…after two months of continuous carpet bombing and not one response from these people, they went from the “Elite Republican Guard” to the “Republican Guard”. Not nearly as Elite as we may have led you to believe. And after another 3 weeks of bombing, they went from “The Elite Republican Guard” to “The Republican Guard” to “The Republican’s made this s### up about there even being guards out there in the 1st place, we hope you enjoyed your firework show”
Obviously the worst thing about The Persian Gulf Distraction was the disparity and the casualties. Iraq 170,000, America…79. I’ll go over those numbers once again, they’re a little baffling at first. Iraq 170,000, America?....79. Wow…does that mean if we had sent over 80 guys, we still would have won that thing? Just 1 guy in a ticker-tape parade, “Hey I did it, it was all me”.
Y’see , I was in the un-envious position of being for the war but against the troops. Those guys were in hog-heaven man, great big weapons catalogue open, beer in hand:
“What’s G13 do Tommy?”
“Says here it destroys everything but the fillings in their teeth and helps us pay for the war effort”
”Well shoot, pull that one up”
“Pull up G13”
(makes whooshing noise and pauses…pauses…pauses)
Ka-boom
“…Cool! What’s G14?”
And Bush man, turned into a ####ing demon. Unsurprisingly. It’s not that I disagree with his foreign policy or domestic agenda, it’s that I think he’s a child of Satan let loose to destroy the planet…yeah…I’m a little to the left on this issue. He labeled the suicide bombers as cowardly. Cowardly? Hey, I don’t agree with these idiots thinking they got a guest-list to Nirvana by blowing themselves up like some piñata, but it aint cowardly. They kill themselves for a belief and we launch cruise missiles from giant floating iron islands 3000 miles away. Say what you want about their issues man, but it ain’t cowardly.
But yet again, CNN blew it all out of proportion man…I was listening to Saddam on CNN and he said “I do not want a war, I just want to see George Bush’s head kicked down the street like a football” and I thought….wow that’s odd ‘cos, that’s exactly what I was thinking! Who’d a thunk it? Me and Saddam are this close man!
Y’see, there is an easy option to this thing man. *We* should have assassinated Bush and said “That’s how you do it, don’t ### with us towel heads”. And, y’know…if Bush had died, there would have been NO loss of innocent life.
Really? You doubt that? You think I’m some sorta Commie huh? Ok, well…look at this way. All those military advisors on CNN “Iraq? Incredible weapons, incredible.” “How do you know? They wouldn’t let inspectors in?” “Heh…well…we looked at the receipt”
Come on man, that country doesn’t even have a swimming pool, where they gonna go buy weapons from huh? And what’s weird is your newspapers said you sold them “machine tools”. Your Orwellian language not withstanding, it’s a gun. That’s a machine and a tool. Machine Tool. But our papers said we sold them “Farming equipment”. Hahahaha, farming equipment! Sure ok, I’ll bite…what equipment?
“Ah well…the ah…flame throwing rake”
“There are no trees in Iraq you liar”
“Ok well…ah…oh, oh the armed tractor! No wait though, he’s a Hitler and here’s a foetus and if you disagree then you’re anti-America!”
No, I’m just anti-human. There *is* a difference.
Page:
Because he's got 2 new CDs out and they rock, just a quick recap of his most popular material that, 8years after his death, still bears relevance:
"The Gulf War. Ok first of all, and this needs to be said, there never was a war. How can you say that Bill? Well, war is when *two* armies are fighting. So you can see right there, wasn't exactly a war. Remember how CNN talked about 'The Elite Republican Guard' in hushed tones like they were the bogeymen?
"Yeah we're doing well but we have yet to meet....The Elite Republican Guard", like these guys are 10ft tall Desert Warriors (stomps around stage) “We s##t bullets”. Yeah well…after two months of continuous carpet bombing and not one response from these people, they went from the “Elite Republican Guard” to the “Republican Guard”. Not nearly as Elite as we may have led you to believe. And after another 3 weeks of bombing, they went from “The Elite Republican Guard” to “The Republican Guard” to “The Republican’s made this s### up about there even being guards out there in the 1st place, we hope you enjoyed your firework show”
Obviously the worst thing about The Persian Gulf Distraction was the disparity and the casualties. Iraq 170,000, America…79. I’ll go over those numbers once again, they’re a little baffling at first. Iraq 170,000, America?....79. Wow…does that mean if we had sent over 80 guys, we still would have won that thing? Just 1 guy in a ticker-tape parade, “Hey I did it, it was all me”.
Y’see , I was in the un-envious position of being for the war but against the troops. Those guys were in hog-heaven man, great big weapons catalogue open, beer in hand:
“What’s G13 do Tommy?”
“Says here it destroys everything but the fillings in their teeth and helps us pay for the war effort”
”Well shoot, pull that one up”
“Pull up G13”
(makes whooshing noise and pauses…pauses…pauses)
Ka-boom
“…Cool! What’s G14?”
And Bush man, turned into a ####ing demon. Unsurprisingly. It’s not that I disagree with his foreign policy or domestic agenda, it’s that I think he’s a child of Satan let loose to destroy the planet…yeah…I’m a little to the left on this issue. He labeled the suicide bombers as cowardly. Cowardly? Hey, I don’t agree with these idiots thinking they got a guest-list to Nirvana by blowing themselves up like some piñata, but it aint cowardly. They kill themselves for a belief and we launch cruise missiles from giant floating iron islands 3000 miles away. Say what you want about their issues man, but it ain’t cowardly.
But yet again, CNN blew it all out of proportion man…I was listening to Saddam on CNN and he said “I do not want a war, I just want to see George Bush’s head kicked down the street like a football” and I thought….wow that’s odd ‘cos, that’s exactly what I was thinking! Who’d a thunk it? Me and Saddam are this close man!
Y’see, there is an easy option to this thing man. *We* should have assassinated Bush and said “That’s how you do it, don’t ### with us towel heads”. And, y’know…if Bush had died, there would have been NO loss of innocent life.
Really? You doubt that? You think I’m some sorta Commie huh? Ok, well…look at this way. All those military advisors on CNN “Iraq? Incredible weapons, incredible.” “How do you know? They wouldn’t let inspectors in?” “Heh…well…we looked at the receipt”
Come on man, that country doesn’t even have a swimming pool, where they gonna go buy weapons from huh? And what’s weird is your newspapers said you sold them “machine tools”. Your Orwellian language not withstanding, it’s a gun. That’s a machine and a tool. Machine Tool. But our papers said we sold them “Farming equipment”. Hahahaha, farming equipment! Sure ok, I’ll bite…what equipment?
“Ah well…the ah…flame throwing rake”
“There are no trees in Iraq you liar”
“Ok well…ah…oh, oh the armed tractor! No wait though, he’s a Hitler and here’s a foetus and if you disagree then you’re anti-America!”
No, I’m just anti-human. There *is* a difference.
"The Gulf War. Ok first of all, and this needs to be said, there never was a war. How can you say that Bill? Well, war is when *two* armies are fighting. So you can see right there, wasn't exactly a war. Remember how CNN talked about 'The Elite Republican Guard' in hushed tones like they were the bogeymen?
"Yeah we're doing well but we have yet to meet....The Elite Republican Guard", like these guys are 10ft tall Desert Warriors (stomps around stage) “We s##t bullets”. Yeah well…after two months of continuous carpet bombing and not one response from these people, they went from the “Elite Republican Guard” to the “Republican Guard”. Not nearly as Elite as we may have led you to believe. And after another 3 weeks of bombing, they went from “The Elite Republican Guard” to “The Republican Guard” to “The Republican’s made this s### up about there even being guards out there in the 1st place, we hope you enjoyed your firework show”
Obviously the worst thing about The Persian Gulf Distraction was the disparity and the casualties. Iraq 170,000, America…79. I’ll go over those numbers once again, they’re a little baffling at first. Iraq 170,000, America?....79. Wow…does that mean if we had sent over 80 guys, we still would have won that thing? Just 1 guy in a ticker-tape parade, “Hey I did it, it was all me”.
Y’see , I was in the un-envious position of being for the war but against the troops. Those guys were in hog-heaven man, great big weapons catalogue open, beer in hand:
“What’s G13 do Tommy?”
“Says here it destroys everything but the fillings in their teeth and helps us pay for the war effort”
”Well shoot, pull that one up”
“Pull up G13”
(makes whooshing noise and pauses…pauses…pauses)
Ka-boom
“…Cool! What’s G14?”
And Bush man, turned into a ####ing demon. Unsurprisingly. It’s not that I disagree with his foreign policy or domestic agenda, it’s that I think he’s a child of Satan let loose to destroy the planet…yeah…I’m a little to the left on this issue. He labeled the suicide bombers as cowardly. Cowardly? Hey, I don’t agree with these idiots thinking they got a guest-list to Nirvana by blowing themselves up like some piñata, but it aint cowardly. They kill themselves for a belief and we launch cruise missiles from giant floating iron islands 3000 miles away. Say what you want about their issues man, but it ain’t cowardly.
But yet again, CNN blew it all out of proportion man…I was listening to Saddam on CNN and he said “I do not want a war, I just want to see George Bush’s head kicked down the street like a football” and I thought….wow that’s odd ‘cos, that’s exactly what I was thinking! Who’d a thunk it? Me and Saddam are this close man!
Y’see, there is an easy option to this thing man. *We* should have assassinated Bush and said “That’s how you do it, don’t ### with us towel heads”. And, y’know…if Bush had died, there would have been NO loss of innocent life.
Really? You doubt that? You think I’m some sorta Commie huh? Ok, well…look at this way. All those military advisors on CNN “Iraq? Incredible weapons, incredible.” “How do you know? They wouldn’t let inspectors in?” “Heh…well…we looked at the receipt”
Come on man, that country doesn’t even have a swimming pool, where they gonna go buy weapons from huh? And what’s weird is your newspapers said you sold them “machine tools”. Your Orwellian language not withstanding, it’s a gun. That’s a machine and a tool. Machine Tool. But our papers said we sold them “Farming equipment”. Hahahaha, farming equipment! Sure ok, I’ll bite…what equipment?
“Ah well…the ah…flame throwing rake”
“There are no trees in Iraq you liar”
“Ok well…ah…oh, oh the armed tractor! No wait though, he’s a Hitler and here’s a foetus and if you disagree then you’re anti-America!”
No, I’m just anti-human. There *is* a difference.
Excellent. I also am spreading the word of Hicks, sending out audio CDs to all and sundry. It's scary how close the stuff he was saying 7-8 years ago relates to stuff happening today. It's even the same president, for crying out loud.
"Iraq? Incredible weapons, INCREDIBLE weapons."
"How do you know that?"
"Er... we looked at the receipt. But as soon as that cheque clears, we're going in."
"Iraq? Incredible weapons, INCREDIBLE weapons."
"How do you know that?"
"Er... we looked at the receipt. But as soon as that cheque clears, we're going in."
Superb. That pretty much made my day.
Which CDs are coming out? I have one of his videos (Relentless I think) but I might have to add those CDs to my christmas list.
"Dear Gran, Please send me whichever Bill Hicks CD has the rant about any artist advertising any product ever ('Aw, but it's such a nice little product') actually sucking Satan's..."
Which CDs are coming out? I have one of his videos (Relentless I think) but I might have to add those CDs to my christmas list.
"Dear Gran, Please send me whichever Bill Hicks CD has the rant about any artist advertising any product ever ('Aw, but it's such a nice little product') actually sucking Satan's..."
unknown kernel wrote:
> "Dear Gran, Please send me whichever Bill Hicks CD has the rant
> about any artist advertising any product ever ('Aw, but it's such a
> nice little product') actually sucking Satan's..."
--
That's "Rant in E-Minor".
Track is "Artistic Roll Call":
"For the record, and let's not mince words because our very lives depend only on truth at all times...IF you do a commercial, you are off the artistic roll call forever. End of story. I dont care if you crap Mona Lisa's on command, you are now a corporate shill and every word outta your mouth is like a terd falling into my drink. And I've been offered 'em so dont think I'm bitter..why d'I turn 'em down? Because I'm not a salesman ok? HAHAHAHAHA...and I dont need money that's built on blood so...yeah"
> "Dear Gran, Please send me whichever Bill Hicks CD has the rant
> about any artist advertising any product ever ('Aw, but it's such a
> nice little product') actually sucking Satan's..."
--
That's "Rant in E-Minor".
Track is "Artistic Roll Call":
"For the record, and let's not mince words because our very lives depend only on truth at all times...IF you do a commercial, you are off the artistic roll call forever. End of story. I dont care if you crap Mona Lisa's on command, you are now a corporate shill and every word outta your mouth is like a terd falling into my drink. And I've been offered 'em so dont think I'm bitter..why d'I turn 'em down? Because I'm not a salesman ok? HAHAHAHAHA...and I dont need money that's built on blood so...yeah"
This is good, even made me laugh :)
Though the CIA later proved the Elite Republican Guard sat out most of the war underground, in the facilities we built Iraq in the early 80's. Sorry couldnt resist :)
~~Belldandy~~
Though the CIA later proved the Elite Republican Guard sat out most of the war underground, in the facilities we built Iraq in the early 80's. Sorry couldnt resist :)
~~Belldandy~~
now come on goaty that's too much typin even for you do you even have a job/girlfriend/education/life/dog??
He runs the Boob Olympics.
Lickychops wrote:
> now come on goaty that's too much typin even for you do you even have
> a job/girlfriend/education/life/dog??
---
Yep. Oh yes. Better than yours. See previous. Yep.
> now come on goaty that's too much typin even for you do you even have
> a job/girlfriend/education/life/dog??
---
Yep. Oh yes. Better than yours. See previous. Yep.
I nearly bought a CD in Fopp a few weeks ago, I never had enough money though.
I will one day though because he makes me laugh and nod.
I will one day though because he makes me laugh and nod.
I like then concept of "farming machinery" being military.
You don't need a scarecrow when you've got an Apache Gunship on standby in the barn.
You don't need a scarecrow when you've got an Apache Gunship on standby in the barn.
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