Viewing Thread:
"There is a really appaling film on Channel 5."

I don't even know what it's about. They seemed to spend the first hour doing nothing at all apart from setting up a sniper rifle, having a short fight, and talking about nothing while having poor quality flashbacks to being shot at.

It's slow, dull, and the insane bint from coupling seems to be in it.

The negotiator is a sweet film. The plot has got to be one of the best there is. Also,the way the film plays out, its just really great, it's one of my top 50 films of all times.

Well tonight C5 has a great Samuel L. movie on, The Negotiator. Woo!

I think RAC gimps: Burning rubber, had recently been commissioned by C5 and will appear next year in a straight to video deal. Henry Winkler is to make a comeback as Garry Gimp, whilst Gregory Gimpoid is going to be portrayed by Michael Barrymore, who lives in a box (that prevents him from any awareness of actions taking place nearby) next to a swimming pool.

AA Dominatrix: Whiplash, is also in production.

The only things worse than those crappy action movies C5 shows, are those two stupid RAC gimps that appear before and after every ad break. If the crapness of the film doesn't put me off watching it, then those two certainly do.

I still remember seeing a bit of "Shadow Warriors: Assault on Devil's Island" on C5.
A squad of kidnapped American gymnasts are being held in the infamous French prison known as Devil's Island, and only Hulk Hogan, Carl Weathers and Shannon Tweed can save them.

Note: I'd like to point out that I have good tatse in movies, and only watched it for comedy value and Carl Weathers.

Goatboy wrote:
> Channel 5's movies must be bought by some ballon-head that keeps
> renting tapes from the "action" section of Blockbuster.

I don't think they even buy the movie, they just do the rental bit, stick the film on (hence the low quality picture-atmospheric conditions/ wuss transmitter my buttocks) and take it back once it has finished. I bet they don't even rewind it either...

Channel 5's movies must be bought by some ballon-head that keeps renting tapes from the "action" section of Blockbuster.

You know the ones: Vietnam movies with Don Swayze and Eric Roberts, terrorist movies with Jeff Fahey & Don "The Dragon" Wilson.

monkey_man wrote:
> and lo a nation of perverts was born.

*

7 to be precise.

I remember when Channel 5 started and they were all like "We've got Independence Day, nur nur nur", and everyone was like "They've got Independence Day", but then it was like "Well all we've got is Independence Day...and Mrs Doubtfire", and we were like "But we've seen them anwyway, what else have you got?", and 5 was like "Late night films starring bored housewives and Rutger Hauer.", and we were like "Rutger Hauer!", and they were like "Weeelll, maybe once a year we'll treat you to the Hauer, but every Friday night we'll put on a cheap porn flick starring Shannon Tweed.", and lo a nation of perverts was born.

You seem to be suprised that there's a bad film on Channel 5, what's up with that?