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We in England had our annual opportunity to experience what living in a war zone is like; Guy Fawkes Night. We too got to enjoy 6 hours of explosions in the background. There were fireworks that looked for all the world like the tracer fire of anti-aircraft weapons. And, just like in Israel and Northern Ireland, we also had morons with only the vaguest idea of how to use the explosives that they carried being guided round the streets by their desire to see somebody getting hurt. Whilst my brother and I pondered the irony of celebrating Bonfire Night during the current war it occurred to us; instead of having the 5th of November as a celebration of the smashing of the Catholic plot to blow up Parliament (thus limiting it to the UK) why don't we redesignate it "World Conflict and Terrorism Day"?
After all, the conspirators were religious fanatics (so were some of their targets but that is by the by...) who wanted to commit a terrorist action that, had it succeeded, would have been the Sept 11 attack of the 17th century. If we extend this celebration around the world, then we can all experience what it is like to live under bombardment in, for example, the Lebanon or Iraq. I suppose we could make it even better by getting the nations that normally pound the hell out of each other to not kill each other for that day. Instead they can pile up dummies dressed in the ethnic costume of their choice into a large pyre and enjoy the same quasi-pagan fun that we in the UK do. The Guy can be the current hate figure of that particular nation, so American Bonfires would have Saddam Hussein and Israeli's would perch Yasser Arafat atop theirs. This would also help stop the accusations that November 5th is an anti Catholic festival because the Guy wouldn't necessarily be the ubiquitous Mr Fawkes. Speaking personally, I'm more than happy to dispel the accusations altogether. Next November I intend to take a trip to Northern Ireland and set light to Rev. Ian Paisley. If you think about it the fat bigoted piece of old mans rancid smegma has done more for world conflict than poor old Guy, so why not?
After all, the conspirators were religious fanatics (so were some of their targets but that is by the by...) who wanted to commit a terrorist action that, had it succeeded, would have been the Sept 11 attack of the 17th century. If we extend this celebration around the world, then we can all experience what it is like to live under bombardment in, for example, the Lebanon or Iraq. I suppose we could make it even better by getting the nations that normally pound the hell out of each other to not kill each other for that day. Instead they can pile up dummies dressed in the ethnic costume of their choice into a large pyre and enjoy the same quasi-pagan fun that we in the UK do. The Guy can be the current hate figure of that particular nation, so American Bonfires would have Saddam Hussein and Israeli's would perch Yasser Arafat atop theirs. This would also help stop the accusations that November 5th is an anti Catholic festival because the Guy wouldn't necessarily be the ubiquitous Mr Fawkes. Speaking personally, I'm more than happy to dispel the accusations altogether. Next November I intend to take a trip to Northern Ireland and set light to Rev. Ian Paisley. If you think about it the fat bigoted piece of old mans rancid smegma has done more for world conflict than poor old Guy, so why not?
I'd pay money to see a WWE special Royal Rumble with ex-presenters of daytime television shows.
I have visions of the likes of Andy Peters nutting someone from Blue Peter and laughing as their face bled like the niagara falls.
I have visions of the likes of Andy Peters nutting someone from Blue Peter and laughing as their face bled like the niagara falls.
Surely with reality tv going the way it's going, and gameshows getting nastier and nastier it's only a matter of time?
I know Hicks joked about Gladiators with guns, but I dont reckon it's that far away myself.
And I'd subscribe to a Celebrity Big Brother if, as I've tried to get off the ground before, weapons were introduced and it turned into a Lord of The Flies type deal.
It'd be shocking and blah blah, The Daily Mail would have apoplectic rages but who wouldn't tune in to see Z-Grade celebs in a Battle Royale type show?
It'd be a massive ratings winner,people love carnage and death.
If we can televise war and refer to is as "The Theatre of War", surely we can convince Richard & Judy to fight with knives?
I know Hicks joked about Gladiators with guns, but I dont reckon it's that far away myself.
And I'd subscribe to a Celebrity Big Brother if, as I've tried to get off the ground before, weapons were introduced and it turned into a Lord of The Flies type deal.
It'd be shocking and blah blah, The Daily Mail would have apoplectic rages but who wouldn't tune in to see Z-Grade celebs in a Battle Royale type show?
It'd be a massive ratings winner,people love carnage and death.
If we can televise war and refer to is as "The Theatre of War", surely we can convince Richard & Judy to fight with knives?
But we definitely have no pagan elements left in our society, we're just godfearing folks, oh yes sir-ee...
Basically it's a hungover from times when public executions were a form of entertainment.
Basically it's a hungover from times when public executions were a form of entertainment.
I was discussing this the other day, in the context of current "events".
We celebrate a terrorist plot to destroy our government by burning the effigy of said terrorist and letting of low-level explosives.
We've civilised as hell eh?
We celebrate a terrorist plot to destroy our government by burning the effigy of said terrorist and letting of low-level explosives.
We've civilised as hell eh?
We in England had our annual opportunity to experience what living in a war zone is like; Guy Fawkes Night. We too got to enjoy 6 hours of explosions in the background. There were fireworks that looked for all the world like the tracer fire of anti-aircraft weapons. And, just like in Israel and Northern Ireland, we also had morons with only the vaguest idea of how to use the explosives that they carried being guided round the streets by their desire to see somebody getting hurt. Whilst my brother and I pondered the irony of celebrating Bonfire Night during the current war it occurred to us; instead of having the 5th of November as a celebration of the smashing of the Catholic plot to blow up Parliament (thus limiting it to the UK) why don't we redesignate it "World Conflict and Terrorism Day"?
After all, the conspirators were religious fanatics (so were some of their targets but that is by the by...) who wanted to commit a terrorist action that, had it succeeded, would have been the Sept 11 attack of the 17th century. If we extend this celebration around the world, then we can all experience what it is like to live under bombardment in, for example, the Lebanon or Iraq. I suppose we could make it even better by getting the nations that normally pound the hell out of each other to not kill each other for that day. Instead they can pile up dummies dressed in the ethnic costume of their choice into a large pyre and enjoy the same quasi-pagan fun that we in the UK do. The Guy can be the current hate figure of that particular nation, so American Bonfires would have Saddam Hussein and Israeli's would perch Yasser Arafat atop theirs. This would also help stop the accusations that November 5th is an anti Catholic festival because the Guy wouldn't necessarily be the ubiquitous Mr Fawkes. Speaking personally, I'm more than happy to dispel the accusations altogether. Next November I intend to take a trip to Northern Ireland and set light to Rev. Ian Paisley. If you think about it the fat bigoted piece of old mans rancid smegma has done more for world conflict than poor old Guy, so why not?
After all, the conspirators were religious fanatics (so were some of their targets but that is by the by...) who wanted to commit a terrorist action that, had it succeeded, would have been the Sept 11 attack of the 17th century. If we extend this celebration around the world, then we can all experience what it is like to live under bombardment in, for example, the Lebanon or Iraq. I suppose we could make it even better by getting the nations that normally pound the hell out of each other to not kill each other for that day. Instead they can pile up dummies dressed in the ethnic costume of their choice into a large pyre and enjoy the same quasi-pagan fun that we in the UK do. The Guy can be the current hate figure of that particular nation, so American Bonfires would have Saddam Hussein and Israeli's would perch Yasser Arafat atop theirs. This would also help stop the accusations that November 5th is an anti Catholic festival because the Guy wouldn't necessarily be the ubiquitous Mr Fawkes. Speaking personally, I'm more than happy to dispel the accusations altogether. Next November I intend to take a trip to Northern Ireland and set light to Rev. Ian Paisley. If you think about it the fat bigoted piece of old mans rancid smegma has done more for world conflict than poor old Guy, so why not?