Viewing Thread:
"Love is in the air."

'Dear Rare,
A gaming fan rang us fourty two times today to express how much he would like a new Conker game before Christmas on the XBox. We own you now remember. Currently, we just want games on the console and don't really care if they are great because everyone is still buying the Mac game Halo and will wait for Halo II.
Make a new Conker game before Christmas. Enclosed in this letter is a cheque for sixteen pounds. Please use this money wisely in R&D and get back to us if you experience any problems.

Yours owningly, Microsoft'

********

'Dear Microsoft,
We read what you said, we at Rare release games when they are ready. Not when we are told to or when we actually say we will. Company policy is to at least delay the game three times before it hits the shelves. We can completely promise you that a new Conker game will be available by Christmas. However, due to the small tiny print when you signed the contract with Nintendo, we can still use company policy.... I hope to see the game released in the 1st quarter of 2004.

Yours smuggly, Rare'

*********

'Dear Rare,
When you told Shigeru to go and sit in the corner and think about what he had just done all that time ago he never did forget. We are sorry for selling you to Microsoft however, we must move with the times and this email is to wish you lots of luck with your new developing of games for the Xbox. Just remember what made you famous. I think its now your turn to go and sit in the corner and think.

Yours pocket-swellingly, Nintendo'

*********

'Dear Joby,
You are becoming bloody annoying and frankly, we at Nintendo don't care if you have a 6ft Mario and 7ft Lara Croft display. Please stop emailing us.

Andy Williams, Nintendo'

********

Dear Rare,
We have just located the tiny print at the bottom of the contract page saying,

'Rare rule, oh yes we do, by signing this, you are agreeing that Rare can be a self-regulatory company and do what they want and when they want'....

At Microsoft, we felt very stupid when reading this, it is obvious you can not be tempted to create more than two games in the next four years for us. However, we beg now that you really do make them good games. Also, that gamer phoned us again, he had this message to say before hanging up,

'BBBBBLLLLASSSCCOOORRRPPPSSSS...'

Yours embarrasingly, your owner who can do nothing to prevent you from doing nothing. Microsoft.'

**********

To Grix Thraves
Please stop emailing me photos.

Goatboy.

***********

And thank you.
er-no :)

shmoog

Pop because I want to prove that I did try and laugh at Nintendo.

;-D

Splendid old chap.

auf deutsch wrote:
> Enclosed in this letter is a cheque for sixteen pounds
>
> Lol, when of the best lines I've read on these forums :D

*head inflates*

Its replies like this that really make me love this forum.

:)

Enclosed in this letter is a cheque for sixteen pounds

Lol, when of the best lines I've read on these forums :D

Semajal wrote:
> Go er no :D
>
> best topic ive read all week :D
>
> rofl :)

Comments like that make this so far really bad and depressing day seem a lot better.

Thanks dudes :)

'Dear Joby,
You are becoming bloody annoying and frankly, we at Nintendo don't care if you have a 6ft Mario and 7ft Lara Croft display. Please stop emailing us.

Andy Williams, Nintendo'

pure genius there

Go er no :D

best topic ive read all week :D

rofl :)

Very good.

:0)

Mantis wrote:
> LOl
>
> Very good. Like strafex a bit lost for words.

I aim to please... yet I cannot understand it when they just remain breathless....