Viewing Thread:
"Eastenders - The Movie."

The Hollywood bigwigs are always on the look out for new and exciting ideas for their motion pictures and rumour has it that a major Hollywood studio has bought up the rights to our beloved soap ‘Eastenders’ as a basis for a new blockbuster.

Cast list;

Phil and Grant Mitchell – Vin Diesel and Bruce Willis
Peggy Mitchell – Dolly Parton
Lisa Fowler – Heather Graham
Mark Fowler – Tom Hanks
Cat Slater – Courtney Love
Zoe Slater – Nev Campbell
Charlie Slater – Marlon Brando
Mo Slater – Kathy Bates
Little Mo – Courtney Cox
Barry – Jack Black
Natalie - Meg Ryan

Plot lines:

The Mitchells -
The scene is set in the ‘Queen Vic’. Phil and Grant have to take matters into their own hands and reclaim their pub from a rowdy group of customers who have the cheek to be actually enjoying themselves in Albert Square.

‘No-one has fun on my manor’ says Phil. They then have to call upon their army training to oust the unwanted guests in a series of ‘Die Hard style’ skirmishes.

The Slaters –
Meanwhile, just across the road the Slaters are innocently playing Monopoly. All hell breaks loose when Big Mo tries to go forward 9 spaces instead of 8. The whole family erupts into argument, and a fight to the death ensues. Who will survive?

Also, as a sub-plot, Cat gets wedged inside one of her increasingly tight skirts. Oh and Charlie cries, as usual.

Mark and Barry – With their respective wives out for a night on the tiles, the two guys are left at home to baby-sit. They get distracted whilst having a discussion about who has the worst life and the Babies escape.

This gives way to an ‘oh so hilarious’ race around Walford in an attempt to reclaim their offspring, in which Mark laughably tries to act like a hard man and Barry falls over a-lot. ‘Doh’.

This movie is very much still on the drawing board and I will keep you updated when new information becomes available.

Excellent. :o)

Can we have the ghost of Arthur Fowler in there too, played by Christopher Lee?

And could Limp Bizkit remix the theme? *cringe*

Heh, suggested addition to script here;

Barry takes delivery of a petrol tanker full of fuel, but realises the car lot has no petrol pumps. He gets in the cab and drives it in front of the Queen Vic. This causes a massive traffic jam right around the whole immediate area. Barry looks at the mess he's made out of the window and says "Better get rid of this lot before Pat finds out", he pressed a "Release" button in the cab. Petrol spills out onto the car behind him and trickles down the road around the square. Martin runs over to Barry and asks if he's okay, Barry tells him to watch whilst he reverses. Barry reverses into the car behind crushing it's front, it sets on fire, fire spreads around whole immediate area, petrol tanker explodes. The entire cast of characters and the whole Walford area is torched, amongst the ashes of the Queen Vic rescuers find Peggy Mitchell still alive shouting "Phil, Phil" over and over again. "How'd she survive says one rescuer, "We're not that lucky" replies his companion.

Ta da ! No more Eastenders - a great film for that fact alone :)

~~Belldandy~~

The Hollywood bigwigs are always on the look out for new and exciting ideas for their motion pictures and rumour has it that a major Hollywood studio has bought up the rights to our beloved soap ‘Eastenders’ as a basis for a new blockbuster.

Cast list;

Phil and Grant Mitchell – Vin Diesel and Bruce Willis
Peggy Mitchell – Dolly Parton
Lisa Fowler – Heather Graham
Mark Fowler – Tom Hanks
Cat Slater – Courtney Love
Zoe Slater – Nev Campbell
Charlie Slater – Marlon Brando
Mo Slater – Kathy Bates
Little Mo – Courtney Cox
Barry – Jack Black
Natalie - Meg Ryan

Plot lines:

The Mitchells -
The scene is set in the ‘Queen Vic’. Phil and Grant have to take matters into their own hands and reclaim their pub from a rowdy group of customers who have the cheek to be actually enjoying themselves in Albert Square.

‘No-one has fun on my manor’ says Phil. They then have to call upon their army training to oust the unwanted guests in a series of ‘Die Hard style’ skirmishes.

The Slaters –
Meanwhile, just across the road the Slaters are innocently playing Monopoly. All hell breaks loose when Big Mo tries to go forward 9 spaces instead of 8. The whole family erupts into argument, and a fight to the death ensues. Who will survive?

Also, as a sub-plot, Cat gets wedged inside one of her increasingly tight skirts. Oh and Charlie cries, as usual.

Mark and Barry – With their respective wives out for a night on the tiles, the two guys are left at home to baby-sit. They get distracted whilst having a discussion about who has the worst life and the Babies escape.

This gives way to an ‘oh so hilarious’ race around Walford in an attempt to reclaim their offspring, in which Mark laughably tries to act like a hard man and Barry falls over a-lot. ‘Doh’.

This movie is very much still on the drawing board and I will keep you updated when new information becomes available.