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Cookem 4!
Once again fate brings together all who accept the bribe...
Somewhere in the Kitchen utensils aisle of your local Tesco's a mighty battle is taking place with the most skilled of chef's trained in both baking and cooking of small vegetables.
Round 1!
Queen Vs Er-no
Queen gets in the first hit using his rabbit head to nibble the edges of Er-no's cake but Er-no has a cunning plan. Just as Queen wipes the jam of his whiskers Er-no jumps on top of his head grabs Queens floppy ears and smacks him on the head with a whisk. For a split second the battle looks won but just as Queen's last Spinach points were about to go he tosses Er-no down to the ground almost wiping out his opponents remaining Spinach points. Er-no had to get serious now he couldn’t make any more mistakes. Er-no decided to make a dash for his wooden spoon but he was to late Queen had already drawn his plastic fork and catapulted small explosive peas to Er-no finally killing the pastry chef
Round 2!
Woods Anarchy Vs The Gerrid
Anarchy tosses back his grease-ridden hair and stairs into the pitch black eyes of Gerrid. Gerrid Simply smiles and admires Anarchy's melons but before he knows the round has even started Gerrid feels a carrot crack over his head. This really p!ssed Gerrid off he reached into his pocket and grabbed his copyrighted super ladle. With only half of his Spinach left this attack was his only chance he had to even up the score. Gerrid kicked Anarchy in the chest and started to fry up some Chinese food using his greasy hair. Anarchy had no more than 3 Spinach particles left and was stumbling around raving on about how he loved the smell of bacon in the morning. Gerrid took advantage of Anarchy's weakened state and hit Anarchy's unmentionables with a rather hefty rolling in. Leaving Anarchy crying on the floor still raving about meat products.
Round 3!
Queen Vs Gerrid
**This was the match to see who would face the mighty Microchips from the aisle next door**
Queen stands there twitching his whiskers and flexing his featherweight muscles sizing up his enemy. DING DING!! The match had started and Queen fancied the look of Gerrid's pastries and decided to try and nibble at them just like he'd nibbled Er-no's cake. Gerrid Sprung into action however and using a Wok smashed Queen’s face so hard his face looked like crater full of tomato sauce and jelly. Gerrid started to get cocky and waved a carrot in front of Queen for no reason other than it was funny but just Queen took his first bite Gerrid chopped up an onion and cunningly threw it in to his eyes causing Queen to have rapid convulsions on the floor. GERRID had won again!!
Final Battle!
Gerrid Vs Microchips
**Cheap and cheerful music played across the shop announcement speakers to get everyone in the spirit for the final Cooking**
Gerrid was shaking from his head to his chef's spoon until hey saw the small black box emerge from around the corner however he didn’t believe what he saw, Microchips was... A box of Micro wavable pickle skins!! DING DING!! FINAL BATTLE!! **Announced ReDdy over the bargain announcer** Gerrid reached slyly for his packet of matches in his pocket to set the box a light! But Microchips was to quick for him and before he new what was happening the overwhelming smell of pickles was making him feel like he was on a bad acid trip but then he looked down at his right arm and saw the Dennis the Menace Transfer. He quickly ripped it of but it was to late the drugs were talking effect and suddenly he was a Swiss sausage. Microchips started to charge at Gerrid hoping to take out his remaining Spinach points the acid had left. Gerrid saw the giant pickle filled box running towards him and remembered his matches again he pulled them out of his back pocket and lit the only one he had left. The flame burned brightly as he held it out ready to throw into the box when suddenly the match went out. Gerrid stared in horror at the approaching box and before he could find out that he only had safety matches the box hit him with a mighty splat! All of Gerrid's Cakes and pastry's were on the walls. Gerrid looked down at the whipped cream on his jacket and said his last words. "Keep on... baking..."
And with that Gerrid lost all of his Spinach points leaving the rather repulsively smelling box of pickles laughing in the background. Everyone hated Microchips for his actions but little did he now that ReDdy was sneaking up behind his rectangular rear end with a blow torch turned up full…
Once again fate brings together all who accept the bribe...
Somewhere in the Kitchen utensils aisle of your local Tesco's a mighty battle is taking place with the most skilled of chef's trained in both baking and cooking of small vegetables.
Round 1!
Queen Vs Er-no
Queen gets in the first hit using his rabbit head to nibble the edges of Er-no's cake but Er-no has a cunning plan. Just as Queen wipes the jam of his whiskers Er-no jumps on top of his head grabs Queens floppy ears and smacks him on the head with a whisk. For a split second the battle looks won but just as Queen's last Spinach points were about to go he tosses Er-no down to the ground almost wiping out his opponents remaining Spinach points. Er-no had to get serious now he couldn’t make any more mistakes. Er-no decided to make a dash for his wooden spoon but he was to late Queen had already drawn his plastic fork and catapulted small explosive peas to Er-no finally killing the pastry chef
Round 2!
Woods Anarchy Vs The Gerrid
Anarchy tosses back his grease-ridden hair and stairs into the pitch black eyes of Gerrid. Gerrid Simply smiles and admires Anarchy's melons but before he knows the round has even started Gerrid feels a carrot crack over his head. This really p!ssed Gerrid off he reached into his pocket and grabbed his copyrighted super ladle. With only half of his Spinach left this attack was his only chance he had to even up the score. Gerrid kicked Anarchy in the chest and started to fry up some Chinese food using his greasy hair. Anarchy had no more than 3 Spinach particles left and was stumbling around raving on about how he loved the smell of bacon in the morning. Gerrid took advantage of Anarchy's weakened state and hit Anarchy's unmentionables with a rather hefty rolling in. Leaving Anarchy crying on the floor still raving about meat products.
Round 3!
Queen Vs Gerrid
**This was the match to see who would face the mighty Microchips from the aisle next door**
Queen stands there twitching his whiskers and flexing his featherweight muscles sizing up his enemy. DING DING!! The match had started and Queen fancied the look of Gerrid's pastries and decided to try and nibble at them just like he'd nibbled Er-no's cake. Gerrid Sprung into action however and using a Wok smashed Queen’s face so hard his face looked like crater full of tomato sauce and jelly. Gerrid started to get cocky and waved a carrot in front of Queen for no reason other than it was funny but just Queen took his first bite Gerrid chopped up an onion and cunningly threw it in to his eyes causing Queen to have rapid convulsions on the floor. GERRID had won again!!
Final Battle!
Gerrid Vs Microchips
**Cheap and cheerful music played across the shop announcement speakers to get everyone in the spirit for the final Cooking**
Gerrid was shaking from his head to his chef's spoon until hey saw the small black box emerge from around the corner however he didn’t believe what he saw, Microchips was... A box of Micro wavable pickle skins!! DING DING!! FINAL BATTLE!! **Announced ReDdy over the bargain announcer** Gerrid reached slyly for his packet of matches in his pocket to set the box a light! But Microchips was to quick for him and before he new what was happening the overwhelming smell of pickles was making him feel like he was on a bad acid trip but then he looked down at his right arm and saw the Dennis the Menace Transfer. He quickly ripped it of but it was to late the drugs were talking effect and suddenly he was a Swiss sausage. Microchips started to charge at Gerrid hoping to take out his remaining Spinach points the acid had left. Gerrid saw the giant pickle filled box running towards him and remembered his matches again he pulled them out of his back pocket and lit the only one he had left. The flame burned brightly as he held it out ready to throw into the box when suddenly the match went out. Gerrid stared in horror at the approaching box and before he could find out that he only had safety matches the box hit him with a mighty splat! All of Gerrid's Cakes and pastry's were on the walls. Gerrid looked down at the whipped cream on his jacket and said his last words. "Keep on... baking..."
And with that Gerrid lost all of his Spinach points leaving the rather repulsively smelling box of pickles laughing in the background. Everyone hated Microchips for his actions but little did he now that ReDdy was sneaking up behind his rectangular rear end with a blow torch turned up full…
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great post!
Great spoof Cubist. Really funny too.
Thanks for including me!
:)
Thanks for including me!
:)
Awsome post cubist.
LOL, nice post mate!
Awesome post Cubist.
Nice post Cubester ;-) Thanks for the mention.
lol thanx
Nice Post cubist, you have ben posting some good stuff i have noticed.
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