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Hello, and welcome to another epic edition of Trading Places. The show where the viewing public can see how people constantly within the watchful eye of the media can cope in alien situations. Today, the symbol of Nintendo, Mario Mario, swaps places with another of Nintendo’s most prestigious computer game characters, Link. Later on, we’ll see how they do spending a day in each other’s lives, but first, lets meet them.
First up is Link – master of the sword, and friend of Princess Zelda’s. He’s never outside without his trusty invisible never-ending backpack that can hold just about anything in, and has smashed that evil giant Ganondorf many times. We went to see him in his homeland – Hyrule.
Interviewer: So Link, how are you doing?
Link: Fine. Zelda has Hyrule, I can have the Mushroom Kingdom.
Interviewer: Well just for a day, you mean?
Link: Er.. yes.
Interviewer: So, tell us about yourself, any pet peeves?
Link: Well.. yes, there is one. My name is Link!
Interviewer: Thanks, but we already knew that. What’s wrong with your name?
Link: Not MY name you fool! For Din’s sake! My name is not Zelda! Whenever anyone picks up one of my games for the first time they *always* call me Zelda! Do you have any idea how that feels? It may be the Legend of Zelda but my name is Link! MY NAME IS LINK, DAMMIT! It just makes me want to..
At this point Link seemed to take something from his back that looked like an explosive rock, and throw it at the cameraman. He was blown backwards and then proceeded to vanish in what looked like a mist of red smoke. A duplicate of him then regenerated out of the ground along with two skeletons and a ghost by the name of Poe. Link’s sword started to glow so we said our goodbyes and got out of there sharpish.
Next up is Mario, and we caught up with him last weekend at his villa in Italy. It was a spacious place, and through the window we could see Luigi doing the hoovering – his ‘reward’ for saving Mario. He invited us in, and we talked to Nintendo’s mascot over a cool glass of mushroom juice.
Interviewer: Mr. Mario…
Mario: Call-a me Mario, please.
Interviewer: Mario, tell us about yourself.
Mario: Well, when I’m not-a saving that typical blonde-a bimbo, I…
Interviewer: ‘Typical blonde bimbo’?
Mario: Yes-a, Peach. You can’t-a think she’s-a very bright – I mean-a, people are supposed to learn-a from their mistakes, correct-a?
Interviewer: Yes, of course.
Mario: Then think-a back. Though he may have done it in a different way-a each time, it doesn’t take a Shigeru Miyamoto to figure out that it goes-a Bowser captures Peach-a, Bowser captures Peach-a again. If she had an ounce of sense-a she wouldn’t need-a my help-a.
It was then that we saw young Toad, and as he emerged from the house he had a tray balancing on his head with a couple of glasses of juice and some pizza. Suddenly, our eyes met. Losing all balance, he sprinted over to me, the glasses smashing onto the floor. ‘Help me!’ he exclaimed, grabbing my shirt and shaking wildly. But before anything could be done, Mario quickly ushered us out of the door and to our van. His polite shouts of ‘Thank-you! Come again!’ drowned Toad’s sorry cries of ‘Kill me! Kill me now!’.
So after a pleasant afternoon with both contestants, it’s time to start the show. It’s 07:00 and in just a short while, our two favourite characters will be shoved through the corresponding portals until 19:00 tonight. So Mario, Link, if you’d like to take your positions, and.. off you go!
Okay then, lets go and see what they’re both getting up to. Here, we can see Link is getting to grips with Peach’s castle.
Toad: Hey, there’s nothing wrong!
Luigi: It’s-a fine Link!
Link: Huh?!
Toad: Trust me, it’s not like the one in Super Smash Bros. Melee!
Link: Ha!
Luigi: He’s-a telling the truth Link! We know about-a your unpleasant experience, but no atom-a bombs will appear this time!
Link: Huh..
Luigi: That’s-a better! And how come we can understand what you’re saying when you just make ‘huh’ noises all the time?
Link: Ha!
Toad: Special gift you say? Well okay, I just thought it was weird how you’ve saved the world many times without saying a word.
Link: [Nods. Walks into castle.]
Well, looks like they’re getting well acquainted, let’s have a look at Mario’s cunning antics:
Mario: Tum.. tum te tum… Hmm? Temple of-a time you say?
It looked like Mario had stumbled upon the temple whilst being chased by a chicken and a couple of dogs. Oh look, he’s going in:
Mario: Hmm.. a sword? This could be-a good for fighting Bowser! [Takes sword]
Uh oh! Mario’s just accidentally stumbled through a time portal, placing him ten years away from the present day and landed himself in the middle of Ganondorf’s castle! Silly him! Too late – the big G is here!
Ganondorf: Muwahahahaha! Foolish man! You think you can foil my plans? You really do? Such worthless creatures shall not distract a genius such as myself. Soon I shall combine the powers of the triforce and become a King! Who will stop me then? You? Princess Zelda? I think not. I will have the world in my grasp shortly, and nothing stands in my way. Power is but an arm’s length away. In less than a day, I will take the crown as the rightful ruler of Hyrule. I shall be better than a King, I shall be your God! Ahaha! Ahahahahahahaaa!
Mario: It’s-a me! Mario!
Ganondorf: …
Mario: Hohohohoho!
Ganondorf: Grrr! [Casts fireball at Mario].
Things got a little out of hand at this point, and as the fireball struck, Ganondorf watched with a quizzical look as Mario leapt around, holding his buttocks, all whilst yelling ‘Hot, hot, hot, hot, hot, hot, hot!’. After watching this, we thought it would be a good idea to join Link again:
Bowser: [Roars].
Link: [Raises eyebrow][Slices Bowser up].
Luigi: Wow! That was-a great!
Navi: You do know we’ve fought giant spiders, huge pairs of hands and evil geniuses?
Luigi: Yes…
Navi: Well what’s this? A slightly large dinosaur? Are you trying to make fun of us?
Luigi: No!
Navi: This actually takes Mario a long time?
Luigi: Well-a…
Navi: And quit with the product placement, we know about your advertising plan with Wella. Now get Shigeru on the phone!
Luigi: But-a..
Link: [Looks stern].
Luigi: Okay-a…
Well! Wasn’t that fun? Unfortunately though, that’s about all we’ve got time for, as it’s nearing 19:00, and the twelve hours is almost up. So lets zap Link back…
Link: Aaaaahhhh!
Hoho! And lets zap Mario back, before Ganondorf devours him…
Mario: Phew!
Thanks for watching Trading Places. I hope you enjoyed viewing it as we did making it. I’m your ever-annoying host – Maverick42 – thank-you, and goodnight!
[Cheesy music plays][Credits roll]
First up is Link – master of the sword, and friend of Princess Zelda’s. He’s never outside without his trusty invisible never-ending backpack that can hold just about anything in, and has smashed that evil giant Ganondorf many times. We went to see him in his homeland – Hyrule.
Interviewer: So Link, how are you doing?
Link: Fine. Zelda has Hyrule, I can have the Mushroom Kingdom.
Interviewer: Well just for a day, you mean?
Link: Er.. yes.
Interviewer: So, tell us about yourself, any pet peeves?
Link: Well.. yes, there is one. My name is Link!
Interviewer: Thanks, but we already knew that. What’s wrong with your name?
Link: Not MY name you fool! For Din’s sake! My name is not Zelda! Whenever anyone picks up one of my games for the first time they *always* call me Zelda! Do you have any idea how that feels? It may be the Legend of Zelda but my name is Link! MY NAME IS LINK, DAMMIT! It just makes me want to..
At this point Link seemed to take something from his back that looked like an explosive rock, and throw it at the cameraman. He was blown backwards and then proceeded to vanish in what looked like a mist of red smoke. A duplicate of him then regenerated out of the ground along with two skeletons and a ghost by the name of Poe. Link’s sword started to glow so we said our goodbyes and got out of there sharpish.
Next up is Mario, and we caught up with him last weekend at his villa in Italy. It was a spacious place, and through the window we could see Luigi doing the hoovering – his ‘reward’ for saving Mario. He invited us in, and we talked to Nintendo’s mascot over a cool glass of mushroom juice.
Interviewer: Mr. Mario…
Mario: Call-a me Mario, please.
Interviewer: Mario, tell us about yourself.
Mario: Well, when I’m not-a saving that typical blonde-a bimbo, I…
Interviewer: ‘Typical blonde bimbo’?
Mario: Yes-a, Peach. You can’t-a think she’s-a very bright – I mean-a, people are supposed to learn-a from their mistakes, correct-a?
Interviewer: Yes, of course.
Mario: Then think-a back. Though he may have done it in a different way-a each time, it doesn’t take a Shigeru Miyamoto to figure out that it goes-a Bowser captures Peach-a, Bowser captures Peach-a again. If she had an ounce of sense-a she wouldn’t need-a my help-a.
It was then that we saw young Toad, and as he emerged from the house he had a tray balancing on his head with a couple of glasses of juice and some pizza. Suddenly, our eyes met. Losing all balance, he sprinted over to me, the glasses smashing onto the floor. ‘Help me!’ he exclaimed, grabbing my shirt and shaking wildly. But before anything could be done, Mario quickly ushered us out of the door and to our van. His polite shouts of ‘Thank-you! Come again!’ drowned Toad’s sorry cries of ‘Kill me! Kill me now!’.
So after a pleasant afternoon with both contestants, it’s time to start the show. It’s 07:00 and in just a short while, our two favourite characters will be shoved through the corresponding portals until 19:00 tonight. So Mario, Link, if you’d like to take your positions, and.. off you go!
Okay then, lets go and see what they’re both getting up to. Here, we can see Link is getting to grips with Peach’s castle.
Toad: Hey, there’s nothing wrong!
Luigi: It’s-a fine Link!
Link: Huh?!
Toad: Trust me, it’s not like the one in Super Smash Bros. Melee!
Link: Ha!
Luigi: He’s-a telling the truth Link! We know about-a your unpleasant experience, but no atom-a bombs will appear this time!
Link: Huh..
Luigi: That’s-a better! And how come we can understand what you’re saying when you just make ‘huh’ noises all the time?
Link: Ha!
Toad: Special gift you say? Well okay, I just thought it was weird how you’ve saved the world many times without saying a word.
Link: [Nods. Walks into castle.]
Well, looks like they’re getting well acquainted, let’s have a look at Mario’s cunning antics:
Mario: Tum.. tum te tum… Hmm? Temple of-a time you say?
It looked like Mario had stumbled upon the temple whilst being chased by a chicken and a couple of dogs. Oh look, he’s going in:
Mario: Hmm.. a sword? This could be-a good for fighting Bowser! [Takes sword]
Uh oh! Mario’s just accidentally stumbled through a time portal, placing him ten years away from the present day and landed himself in the middle of Ganondorf’s castle! Silly him! Too late – the big G is here!
Ganondorf: Muwahahahaha! Foolish man! You think you can foil my plans? You really do? Such worthless creatures shall not distract a genius such as myself. Soon I shall combine the powers of the triforce and become a King! Who will stop me then? You? Princess Zelda? I think not. I will have the world in my grasp shortly, and nothing stands in my way. Power is but an arm’s length away. In less than a day, I will take the crown as the rightful ruler of Hyrule. I shall be better than a King, I shall be your God! Ahaha! Ahahahahahahaaa!
Mario: It’s-a me! Mario!
Ganondorf: …
Mario: Hohohohoho!
Ganondorf: Grrr! [Casts fireball at Mario].
Things got a little out of hand at this point, and as the fireball struck, Ganondorf watched with a quizzical look as Mario leapt around, holding his buttocks, all whilst yelling ‘Hot, hot, hot, hot, hot, hot, hot!’. After watching this, we thought it would be a good idea to join Link again:
Bowser: [Roars].
Link: [Raises eyebrow][Slices Bowser up].
Luigi: Wow! That was-a great!
Navi: You do know we’ve fought giant spiders, huge pairs of hands and evil geniuses?
Luigi: Yes…
Navi: Well what’s this? A slightly large dinosaur? Are you trying to make fun of us?
Luigi: No!
Navi: This actually takes Mario a long time?
Luigi: Well-a…
Navi: And quit with the product placement, we know about your advertising plan with Wella. Now get Shigeru on the phone!
Luigi: But-a..
Link: [Looks stern].
Luigi: Okay-a…
Well! Wasn’t that fun? Unfortunately though, that’s about all we’ve got time for, as it’s nearing 19:00, and the twelve hours is almost up. So lets zap Link back…
Link: Aaaaahhhh!
Hoho! And lets zap Mario back, before Ganondorf devours him…
Mario: Phew!
Thanks for watching Trading Places. I hope you enjoyed viewing it as we did making it. I’m your ever-annoying host – Maverick42 – thank-you, and goodnight!
[Cheesy music plays][Credits roll]
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I am upset too...
Someone talks sense!
very funny - a bit dissapointing that you didn't won GAD...
What a surprise. Someone who's won ten times got it. Isn't that just a bit unfair..?
Maverick42 wrote:
> GAD results should be soon. Fingers crossed and all that.
Fingers crossed, you'll need it to beat me! MWAHAHAHAHA!
URGH!
NOOOOOOoo
I just realised that I have no writing talent and have no chance of a GAD... nooooooooooooooooooo
> GAD results should be soon. Fingers crossed and all that.
Fingers crossed, you'll need it to beat me! MWAHAHAHAHA!
URGH!
NOOOOOOoo
I just realised that I have no writing talent and have no chance of a GAD... nooooooooooooooooooo
GAD results should be soon. Fingers crossed and all that.
I thought it was going to be Ganondorf anyway. We should do bets and stuff on this, could be fun.
Ok, I've sorted out this Bowser and Ganondorf thing in a best of three, two minute, level nine fight on Super Smash Bros. Melee.
Match One: Peach's Castle
Ganondorf wins after Sudden Death.
Match Two: Hyrul Temple
Bowser wins after Sudden Death.
Match Three: DK Island - Jungle Japes
Ganondorf wins.
There you have it, it's close, but Ganondorf is the winner!
Match One: Peach's Castle
Ganondorf wins after Sudden Death.
Match Two: Hyrul Temple
Bowser wins after Sudden Death.
Match Three: DK Island - Jungle Japes
Ganondorf wins.
There you have it, it's close, but Ganondorf is the winner!
phi11ip wrote:
> I've seen some real crap win before!
A GAD just keeps getting more and more likely! ;). Nah, I did spend a considerable bit of time on this though, so it would be nice to win one.
> I've seen some real crap win before!
A GAD just keeps getting more and more likely! ;). Nah, I did spend a considerable bit of time on this though, so it would be nice to win one.
Dr Duck wrote:
> that's true :^)
I'm gonna win!
yay!
> that's true :^)
I'm gonna win!
yay!
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