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The Gnomenwealth Games
Athletics: Track and field events. Sprints, marathons, and entertaining throwing the hammer events, that's more likely to be hammer throwing gnome.
Swimming: Funnily enough the cheaper plastic ones will have the better
chance, given that they'll float. The stone ones will sink to the bottom.
Boxing: In the red corning, wearing the green trunks and lil' red hat is: A gnome. In the blue corner, wearing the green trunks and the lil' red hat is: another gnome. Could be both confusing and highly entertaining.
Cycling: A first chance to see gnomes in lycra.
Gymnastics: Gnomes cartwheeling on beams, swinging on hoops. Freaky.
Especially if they do the rubbish dancing with a ribbon event.
Hockey: They could struggle with this, if a 'no sticks over waist height'
rule is enforced, like at school, as they'll only be able to hit the
underside of the ball.
Rugby: A particularly corpulent gnome could well be mistaken for a rugby
ball, no doubt resulting in much hilarity.
Badminton: Gnomes and their shuttle-****s. Not a typical pose you'll find in the garden centre.
Bowls: The gnomes will be right at home on the lawns. Until some git throws the jack at them.
Judo: Gay fighting. Gnomes that don't like to punch and kick each other can just cuddle for a bit instead, until one falls down, deeming the other the winner.
Netball: This is a girly sport. All gnomes are male, and have beards. So
they're going to sit around and sing folk songs instead.
Shooting: Gnomes with guns. Let's hope they're not too miffed by years of
repression, forced to live in the garden, constantly fishing the pool.
Squash: I can see them now, whacking their little ball around, before they
get an official warning, and get told to start the match.
Table Tennis: Made more interesting given the fact that they can't even see over the net. Fortunately, you can see through it.
Triathlon: These gnomes have stamina. Not one event, not two, but three.
It's as yet undecided if one of these events will be fishing, as gnomes are pretty good at that.
Weightlifting: I can see the little fella's now, lifting many times their
own weight, only to drop them back on their own gnomey heads, smashing them into tiny gnome pieces.
Wrestling: Don't try to tell me that you haven't ever imagined this. Garden gnomes showing how buff they are, throwing each other around the ring. Whilst wearing lycra, and laying on top of each other. What? I *AM* the only one that's imaged that?
Athletics: Track and field events. Sprints, marathons, and entertaining throwing the hammer events, that's more likely to be hammer throwing gnome.
Swimming: Funnily enough the cheaper plastic ones will have the better
chance, given that they'll float. The stone ones will sink to the bottom.
Boxing: In the red corning, wearing the green trunks and lil' red hat is: A gnome. In the blue corner, wearing the green trunks and the lil' red hat is: another gnome. Could be both confusing and highly entertaining.
Cycling: A first chance to see gnomes in lycra.
Gymnastics: Gnomes cartwheeling on beams, swinging on hoops. Freaky.
Especially if they do the rubbish dancing with a ribbon event.
Hockey: They could struggle with this, if a 'no sticks over waist height'
rule is enforced, like at school, as they'll only be able to hit the
underside of the ball.
Rugby: A particularly corpulent gnome could well be mistaken for a rugby
ball, no doubt resulting in much hilarity.
Badminton: Gnomes and their shuttle-****s. Not a typical pose you'll find in the garden centre.
Bowls: The gnomes will be right at home on the lawns. Until some git throws the jack at them.
Judo: Gay fighting. Gnomes that don't like to punch and kick each other can just cuddle for a bit instead, until one falls down, deeming the other the winner.
Netball: This is a girly sport. All gnomes are male, and have beards. So
they're going to sit around and sing folk songs instead.
Shooting: Gnomes with guns. Let's hope they're not too miffed by years of
repression, forced to live in the garden, constantly fishing the pool.
Squash: I can see them now, whacking their little ball around, before they
get an official warning, and get told to start the match.
Table Tennis: Made more interesting given the fact that they can't even see over the net. Fortunately, you can see through it.
Triathlon: These gnomes have stamina. Not one event, not two, but three.
It's as yet undecided if one of these events will be fishing, as gnomes are pretty good at that.
Weightlifting: I can see the little fella's now, lifting many times their
own weight, only to drop them back on their own gnomey heads, smashing them into tiny gnome pieces.
Wrestling: Don't try to tell me that you haven't ever imagined this. Garden gnomes showing how buff they are, throwing each other around the ring. Whilst wearing lycra, and laying on top of each other. What? I *AM* the only one that's imaged that?
LOL!
Excellent stuff Meka!
Excellent stuff Meka!
Shaneo might get mistaken as one of the gnomes and stuck in the boxing ring. Not that this is a bad thing, of course.
The Gnomenwealth Games
Athletics: Track and field events. Sprints, marathons, and entertaining throwing the hammer events, that's more likely to be hammer throwing gnome.
Swimming: Funnily enough the cheaper plastic ones will have the better
chance, given that they'll float. The stone ones will sink to the bottom.
Boxing: In the red corning, wearing the green trunks and lil' red hat is: A gnome. In the blue corner, wearing the green trunks and the lil' red hat is: another gnome. Could be both confusing and highly entertaining.
Cycling: A first chance to see gnomes in lycra.
Gymnastics: Gnomes cartwheeling on beams, swinging on hoops. Freaky.
Especially if they do the rubbish dancing with a ribbon event.
Hockey: They could struggle with this, if a 'no sticks over waist height'
rule is enforced, like at school, as they'll only be able to hit the
underside of the ball.
Rugby: A particularly corpulent gnome could well be mistaken for a rugby
ball, no doubt resulting in much hilarity.
Badminton: Gnomes and their shuttle-****s. Not a typical pose you'll find in the garden centre.
Bowls: The gnomes will be right at home on the lawns. Until some git throws the jack at them.
Judo: Gay fighting. Gnomes that don't like to punch and kick each other can just cuddle for a bit instead, until one falls down, deeming the other the winner.
Netball: This is a girly sport. All gnomes are male, and have beards. So
they're going to sit around and sing folk songs instead.
Shooting: Gnomes with guns. Let's hope they're not too miffed by years of
repression, forced to live in the garden, constantly fishing the pool.
Squash: I can see them now, whacking their little ball around, before they
get an official warning, and get told to start the match.
Table Tennis: Made more interesting given the fact that they can't even see over the net. Fortunately, you can see through it.
Triathlon: These gnomes have stamina. Not one event, not two, but three.
It's as yet undecided if one of these events will be fishing, as gnomes are pretty good at that.
Weightlifting: I can see the little fella's now, lifting many times their
own weight, only to drop them back on their own gnomey heads, smashing them into tiny gnome pieces.
Wrestling: Don't try to tell me that you haven't ever imagined this. Garden gnomes showing how buff they are, throwing each other around the ring. Whilst wearing lycra, and laying on top of each other. What? I *AM* the only one that's imaged that?
Athletics: Track and field events. Sprints, marathons, and entertaining throwing the hammer events, that's more likely to be hammer throwing gnome.
Swimming: Funnily enough the cheaper plastic ones will have the better
chance, given that they'll float. The stone ones will sink to the bottom.
Boxing: In the red corning, wearing the green trunks and lil' red hat is: A gnome. In the blue corner, wearing the green trunks and the lil' red hat is: another gnome. Could be both confusing and highly entertaining.
Cycling: A first chance to see gnomes in lycra.
Gymnastics: Gnomes cartwheeling on beams, swinging on hoops. Freaky.
Especially if they do the rubbish dancing with a ribbon event.
Hockey: They could struggle with this, if a 'no sticks over waist height'
rule is enforced, like at school, as they'll only be able to hit the
underside of the ball.
Rugby: A particularly corpulent gnome could well be mistaken for a rugby
ball, no doubt resulting in much hilarity.
Badminton: Gnomes and their shuttle-****s. Not a typical pose you'll find in the garden centre.
Bowls: The gnomes will be right at home on the lawns. Until some git throws the jack at them.
Judo: Gay fighting. Gnomes that don't like to punch and kick each other can just cuddle for a bit instead, until one falls down, deeming the other the winner.
Netball: This is a girly sport. All gnomes are male, and have beards. So
they're going to sit around and sing folk songs instead.
Shooting: Gnomes with guns. Let's hope they're not too miffed by years of
repression, forced to live in the garden, constantly fishing the pool.
Squash: I can see them now, whacking their little ball around, before they
get an official warning, and get told to start the match.
Table Tennis: Made more interesting given the fact that they can't even see over the net. Fortunately, you can see through it.
Triathlon: These gnomes have stamina. Not one event, not two, but three.
It's as yet undecided if one of these events will be fishing, as gnomes are pretty good at that.
Weightlifting: I can see the little fella's now, lifting many times their
own weight, only to drop them back on their own gnomey heads, smashing them into tiny gnome pieces.
Wrestling: Don't try to tell me that you haven't ever imagined this. Garden gnomes showing how buff they are, throwing each other around the ring. Whilst wearing lycra, and laying on top of each other. What? I *AM* the only one that's imaged that?