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Thankyou for lining the pockets of Micro... I mean thankyou for purchasing the latest in gaming innovations from Microsoft. If you have dealt with Microsoft in the past you may well know by now that we will not refund, give help if there is a problem or answer any questions you may ask, it is against company policy to aid anyone who may need assistance and the extra funds can go towards Bill Gate's extensi... I mean a worthy charity which helps companies increase sales that start with the letter M and end in the letter T.
If any problems occur whilst playing with your Xbox dial 999 or something, what do you mean Microsoft will sort it out? Can't you fight your own battles? Due to limited system resources our Email database has been shut-down, but as a replacement we have invested (actually it was found) a carrier pigeon known as Mini-Bill, just leave some bird-seed near your problem and I am sure he will be glad to assist, but remember possession is 9/10ths of the law so once he is in your home we will make sure he stays there.
Many of you may still be questioning, why X-box? Well to be honest we couldn't afford to finish off the lettering and the first object we saw after manufacturing the X was a box, hence the very original Xbox. Please do not take your console apart as it will void the 6 minute warranty which came with your console, so unless you live next door to the shop you bought the console from it looks like we have just ripp... Ooops! Me and my silly hand!
The serial number should be on the back of the free cereal packet that came with your console, well duh, obviously! But the only problem is, we haven't worked out what the digits are used for so for the moment just show them to your grandma and your friends; you will be the envy of your town!
If at anytime you want to contact us just take a couple of those pills your Nan has and it will calm you down, when you wake up all shall be forgotten and the problem can start all over again! What do you look at me like that for? You have to get some fun out of the console! If you are wondering about the size of the console and what is actually in it then I will clear that up; the size is unnecessary, all we wanted to do was make sure that by the end of our market-stall campaign that we actually controlled 50% of the earth’s surface area.
This should be the point where I ask you to save this Disclaimer just in-case anything goes wrong, but I suppose since your are already reading the Disclaimer something has already gone wrong, don't panic, whatever you do don't panic, just make sure that you help at the local nursing home and give your Grandma a hand carrying the shopping home, that way you will have the money back in no time!
Before I finish, Bill wanted to thank you personally for giving him the glass-eye that he has always wanted. Bill left this message only a few hours before he purchased his new islan... I mean Ice-Cream in Jamaica:
"Thankyou for purchasing the Microsoft woodenbo... I mean Xbox; all donations to my glass-eye fund are greatly appreciated. I am having a great time here in Jamaica but please graciously accept the free coupons for 5p off milk at your local Summerfield. Earlier today I spoke to my dear friend and Co-Developer of the Xbox, Dr.Evil! He told me his plans for an Xbox 2 so I suppose around about now it will be launching (literally) armed (also literally) with some great new innovations. Have fun and remember, every penny counts (only 213p to go)!"
Signed:
Bill Clint... I mean Gates!
If any problems occur whilst playing with your Xbox dial 999 or something, what do you mean Microsoft will sort it out? Can't you fight your own battles? Due to limited system resources our Email database has been shut-down, but as a replacement we have invested (actually it was found) a carrier pigeon known as Mini-Bill, just leave some bird-seed near your problem and I am sure he will be glad to assist, but remember possession is 9/10ths of the law so once he is in your home we will make sure he stays there.
Many of you may still be questioning, why X-box? Well to be honest we couldn't afford to finish off the lettering and the first object we saw after manufacturing the X was a box, hence the very original Xbox. Please do not take your console apart as it will void the 6 minute warranty which came with your console, so unless you live next door to the shop you bought the console from it looks like we have just ripp... Ooops! Me and my silly hand!
The serial number should be on the back of the free cereal packet that came with your console, well duh, obviously! But the only problem is, we haven't worked out what the digits are used for so for the moment just show them to your grandma and your friends; you will be the envy of your town!
If at anytime you want to contact us just take a couple of those pills your Nan has and it will calm you down, when you wake up all shall be forgotten and the problem can start all over again! What do you look at me like that for? You have to get some fun out of the console! If you are wondering about the size of the console and what is actually in it then I will clear that up; the size is unnecessary, all we wanted to do was make sure that by the end of our market-stall campaign that we actually controlled 50% of the earth’s surface area.
This should be the point where I ask you to save this Disclaimer just in-case anything goes wrong, but I suppose since your are already reading the Disclaimer something has already gone wrong, don't panic, whatever you do don't panic, just make sure that you help at the local nursing home and give your Grandma a hand carrying the shopping home, that way you will have the money back in no time!
Before I finish, Bill wanted to thank you personally for giving him the glass-eye that he has always wanted. Bill left this message only a few hours before he purchased his new islan... I mean Ice-Cream in Jamaica:
"Thankyou for purchasing the Microsoft woodenbo... I mean Xbox; all donations to my glass-eye fund are greatly appreciated. I am having a great time here in Jamaica but please graciously accept the free coupons for 5p off milk at your local Summerfield. Earlier today I spoke to my dear friend and Co-Developer of the Xbox, Dr.Evil! He told me his plans for an Xbox 2 so I suppose around about now it will be launching (literally) armed (also literally) with some great new innovations. Have fun and remember, every penny counts (only 213p to go)!"
Signed:
Bill Clint... I mean Gates!
Cheers Tom :)
Great garbe! One of your best posts yet!
I hope this wins GAD.
I hope this wins GAD.
Cheers Fosbe! Its [email protected]
LOL great post Garbe!! Gad worthy maybe? What is your msn email?
Cheers Edgy! :)
Hehe, very good :)
Microsoft at their best...
Microsoft at their best...
Thankyou for lining the pockets of Micro... I mean thankyou for purchasing the latest in gaming innovations from Microsoft. If you have dealt with Microsoft in the past you may well know by now that we will not refund, give help if there is a problem or answer any questions you may ask, it is against company policy to aid anyone who may need assistance and the extra funds can go towards Bill Gate's extensi... I mean a worthy charity which helps companies increase sales that start with the letter M and end in the letter T.
If any problems occur whilst playing with your Xbox dial 999 or something, what do you mean Microsoft will sort it out? Can't you fight your own battles? Due to limited system resources our Email database has been shut-down, but as a replacement we have invested (actually it was found) a carrier pigeon known as Mini-Bill, just leave some bird-seed near your problem and I am sure he will be glad to assist, but remember possession is 9/10ths of the law so once he is in your home we will make sure he stays there.
Many of you may still be questioning, why X-box? Well to be honest we couldn't afford to finish off the lettering and the first object we saw after manufacturing the X was a box, hence the very original Xbox. Please do not take your console apart as it will void the 6 minute warranty which came with your console, so unless you live next door to the shop you bought the console from it looks like we have just ripp... Ooops! Me and my silly hand!
The serial number should be on the back of the free cereal packet that came with your console, well duh, obviously! But the only problem is, we haven't worked out what the digits are used for so for the moment just show them to your grandma and your friends; you will be the envy of your town!
If at anytime you want to contact us just take a couple of those pills your Nan has and it will calm you down, when you wake up all shall be forgotten and the problem can start all over again! What do you look at me like that for? You have to get some fun out of the console! If you are wondering about the size of the console and what is actually in it then I will clear that up; the size is unnecessary, all we wanted to do was make sure that by the end of our market-stall campaign that we actually controlled 50% of the earth’s surface area.
This should be the point where I ask you to save this Disclaimer just in-case anything goes wrong, but I suppose since your are already reading the Disclaimer something has already gone wrong, don't panic, whatever you do don't panic, just make sure that you help at the local nursing home and give your Grandma a hand carrying the shopping home, that way you will have the money back in no time!
Before I finish, Bill wanted to thank you personally for giving him the glass-eye that he has always wanted. Bill left this message only a few hours before he purchased his new islan... I mean Ice-Cream in Jamaica:
"Thankyou for purchasing the Microsoft woodenbo... I mean Xbox; all donations to my glass-eye fund are greatly appreciated. I am having a great time here in Jamaica but please graciously accept the free coupons for 5p off milk at your local Summerfield. Earlier today I spoke to my dear friend and Co-Developer of the Xbox, Dr.Evil! He told me his plans for an Xbox 2 so I suppose around about now it will be launching (literally) armed (also literally) with some great new innovations. Have fun and remember, every penny counts (only 213p to go)!"
Signed:
Bill Clint... I mean Gates!
If any problems occur whilst playing with your Xbox dial 999 or something, what do you mean Microsoft will sort it out? Can't you fight your own battles? Due to limited system resources our Email database has been shut-down, but as a replacement we have invested (actually it was found) a carrier pigeon known as Mini-Bill, just leave some bird-seed near your problem and I am sure he will be glad to assist, but remember possession is 9/10ths of the law so once he is in your home we will make sure he stays there.
Many of you may still be questioning, why X-box? Well to be honest we couldn't afford to finish off the lettering and the first object we saw after manufacturing the X was a box, hence the very original Xbox. Please do not take your console apart as it will void the 6 minute warranty which came with your console, so unless you live next door to the shop you bought the console from it looks like we have just ripp... Ooops! Me and my silly hand!
The serial number should be on the back of the free cereal packet that came with your console, well duh, obviously! But the only problem is, we haven't worked out what the digits are used for so for the moment just show them to your grandma and your friends; you will be the envy of your town!
If at anytime you want to contact us just take a couple of those pills your Nan has and it will calm you down, when you wake up all shall be forgotten and the problem can start all over again! What do you look at me like that for? You have to get some fun out of the console! If you are wondering about the size of the console and what is actually in it then I will clear that up; the size is unnecessary, all we wanted to do was make sure that by the end of our market-stall campaign that we actually controlled 50% of the earth’s surface area.
This should be the point where I ask you to save this Disclaimer just in-case anything goes wrong, but I suppose since your are already reading the Disclaimer something has already gone wrong, don't panic, whatever you do don't panic, just make sure that you help at the local nursing home and give your Grandma a hand carrying the shopping home, that way you will have the money back in no time!
Before I finish, Bill wanted to thank you personally for giving him the glass-eye that he has always wanted. Bill left this message only a few hours before he purchased his new islan... I mean Ice-Cream in Jamaica:
"Thankyou for purchasing the Microsoft woodenbo... I mean Xbox; all donations to my glass-eye fund are greatly appreciated. I am having a great time here in Jamaica but please graciously accept the free coupons for 5p off milk at your local Summerfield. Earlier today I spoke to my dear friend and Co-Developer of the Xbox, Dr.Evil! He told me his plans for an Xbox 2 so I suppose around about now it will be launching (literally) armed (also literally) with some great new innovations. Have fun and remember, every penny counts (only 213p to go)!"
Signed:
Bill Clint... I mean Gates!