The "Freeola Customer Forum" forum, which includes Retro Game Reviews, has been archived and is now read-only. You cannot post here or create a new thread or review on this forum.
Please note, whatever plot this film actually contains may be spoiledby parts of this 'review'
Ah, where to begin. Cabin Fever. My least favourite film of all time, it has to be said. The most 'terrifying' thing about the whole film is that I actually wasted money on the thing.
Don't get we wrong, I'm well aware on the front cover some adle-brained critic who's probably never actually seen the thing has been quoted saying, 'Scary As Hell'. Well watching the film all I could think of was [insert horror here] as I've genuinely been more shocked by what goes on in my town centre than I have by this limp-lettuce attempt at a horror film.
What makes it so bad, as well as the reason I should have hurried past wearing a nosepeg, is that it's a 'teen horror'. Meh I thought at the time I bought it, after all, The Blair Witch is a bit of a teen horror and it has a pretty massive fanbase ... Oh no. Oh dear god, no. This really really means 'teen horror'.
You can only grimace as you sit through a plot where first a group of teens all head off to a remote cabin [did someone say cliche?] for "sex, drugs and alcohol". Right, just about bearable. Then on the way, for no apparent reason, they meet a boy outside a service station who enjoys biting people; whose only purpose seems to be to confuse the hell out of you and allow his father to 'warn' the group. Hmm. From there you whoop in delight as the teens eventually start dropping like flies; becoming paranoid of each other, due to this 'killer in the woods', they subsequently abandon all plot lines to beat each other around the heads with spades.
To it's credit, the way the characters actually die isn't what you expect - so there is some form of twist in its otherwise atrocious plot. Not enough to save Cabin Fever by a long shot. This aforementioned 'teen horror' basically stems from the belief that Hollywood can reinvent what it's like to be a teenager within their films. This basically takes the form of copious amounts of swearing, randomly botched together sex scenes, and of course, a less than healthy amount of drug abuse.
Whoever it is who commented the film was 'Terrifying' should be strapped into a chair and forced to watch the film, while their eyes are being held open with matchsticks and iodine to see how very wrong they were. At best, it's pretty funny, in that kind of B movie 'it's so bad you gotta laugh' way.
Really you sit through around about an hour and a half of non-sensical tripe, which takes place almost solely in a dark wood. This really just involves people just getting worked up about an almost non-existant 'virus' before then being convinced everyone else has it, and so from there killing each other in an amateur gore 'the more blood the better' way.
It draws it's inspiration from things like 'The Blair Witch Project', though mainly only the setting and also Brit film 'The Hole'. It cobbles the inspirations together in a tacky, clumsy way that really means everything's just disjointed. Above all else, Cabin Fever makes you want to go and give your nose a work out in the electric pencil sharpener.
It's special & sound effects are probably the best bit of the film, and they're average at best. They've got the usual 'racy' horror tones but they come on at the worst times and never actually suit the action. Likewise the special effects aren't of a particularly good standard.
Avoid, lest ye cry salty tears of remorse
Ah, where to begin. Cabin Fever. My least favourite film of all time, it has to be said. The most 'terrifying' thing about the whole film is that I actually wasted money on the thing.
Don't get we wrong, I'm well aware on the front cover some adle-brained critic who's probably never actually seen the thing has been quoted saying, 'Scary As Hell'. Well watching the film all I could think of was [insert horror here] as I've genuinely been more shocked by what goes on in my town centre than I have by this limp-lettuce attempt at a horror film.
What makes it so bad, as well as the reason I should have hurried past wearing a nosepeg, is that it's a 'teen horror'. Meh I thought at the time I bought it, after all, The Blair Witch is a bit of a teen horror and it has a pretty massive fanbase ... Oh no. Oh dear god, no. This really really means 'teen horror'.
You can only grimace as you sit through a plot where first a group of teens all head off to a remote cabin [did someone say cliche?] for "sex, drugs and alcohol". Right, just about bearable. Then on the way, for no apparent reason, they meet a boy outside a service station who enjoys biting people; whose only purpose seems to be to confuse the hell out of you and allow his father to 'warn' the group. Hmm. From there you whoop in delight as the teens eventually start dropping like flies; becoming paranoid of each other, due to this 'killer in the woods', they subsequently abandon all plot lines to beat each other around the heads with spades.
To it's credit, the way the characters actually die isn't what you expect - so there is some form of twist in its otherwise atrocious plot. Not enough to save Cabin Fever by a long shot. This aforementioned 'teen horror' basically stems from the belief that Hollywood can reinvent what it's like to be a teenager within their films. This basically takes the form of copious amounts of swearing, randomly botched together sex scenes, and of course, a less than healthy amount of drug abuse.
Whoever it is who commented the film was 'Terrifying' should be strapped into a chair and forced to watch the film, while their eyes are being held open with matchsticks and iodine to see how very wrong they were. At best, it's pretty funny, in that kind of B movie 'it's so bad you gotta laugh' way.
Really you sit through around about an hour and a half of non-sensical tripe, which takes place almost solely in a dark wood. This really just involves people just getting worked up about an almost non-existant 'virus' before then being convinced everyone else has it, and so from there killing each other in an amateur gore 'the more blood the better' way.
It draws it's inspiration from things like 'The Blair Witch Project', though mainly only the setting and also Brit film 'The Hole'. It cobbles the inspirations together in a tacky, clumsy way that really means everything's just disjointed. Above all else, Cabin Fever makes you want to go and give your nose a work out in the electric pencil sharpener.
It's special & sound effects are probably the best bit of the film, and they're average at best. They've got the usual 'racy' horror tones but they come on at the worst times and never actually suit the action. Likewise the special effects aren't of a particularly good standard.
Avoid, lest ye cry salty tears of remorse
Got Severance a couple of days back, and yeah, it's good.
Pretty gory too.
Good stuff.
Pretty gory too.
Good stuff.
Yeah, its simmilar to Dog Soldiers but its much funnier. Its like watching The Office or Peter Kay but in some woods while people are being killed.
Aye that one keeps coming back in recommendations.
Supposed to be like Dog Soldiers too.
I thought Shaun of the Dead's references were pretty lame since they's used the best ones making Spaced. I think it'll fall out of cult status early.
Supposed to be like Dog Soldiers too.
I thought Shaun of the Dead's references were pretty lame since they's used the best ones making Spaced. I think it'll fall out of cult status early.
You should watch Severance. Its about a bunch of office workers who go on a team building weekedn into the woods with the whole general horror stuff in hot persuit. It is at the same time, however, a British comedy in a similar way to Shaun of the Dead. One of the best films Ive seen in ages. Note that I saw it about 5 months ago and have seen loads of films since. Its just that good.
It leeched off the popularity of Evil Dead, a bit like Evil Ed did except that was actually quite fun to watch.
Please note, whatever plot this film actually contains may be spoiledby parts of this 'review'
Ah, where to begin. Cabin Fever. My least favourite film of all time, it has to be said. The most 'terrifying' thing about the whole film is that I actually wasted money on the thing.
Don't get we wrong, I'm well aware on the front cover some adle-brained critic who's probably never actually seen the thing has been quoted saying, 'Scary As Hell'. Well watching the film all I could think of was [insert horror here] as I've genuinely been more shocked by what goes on in my town centre than I have by this limp-lettuce attempt at a horror film.
What makes it so bad, as well as the reason I should have hurried past wearing a nosepeg, is that it's a 'teen horror'. Meh I thought at the time I bought it, after all, The Blair Witch is a bit of a teen horror and it has a pretty massive fanbase ... Oh no. Oh dear god, no. This really really means 'teen horror'.
You can only grimace as you sit through a plot where first a group of teens all head off to a remote cabin [did someone say cliche?] for "sex, drugs and alcohol". Right, just about bearable. Then on the way, for no apparent reason, they meet a boy outside a service station who enjoys biting people; whose only purpose seems to be to confuse the hell out of you and allow his father to 'warn' the group. Hmm. From there you whoop in delight as the teens eventually start dropping like flies; becoming paranoid of each other, due to this 'killer in the woods', they subsequently abandon all plot lines to beat each other around the heads with spades.
To it's credit, the way the characters actually die isn't what you expect - so there is some form of twist in its otherwise atrocious plot. Not enough to save Cabin Fever by a long shot. This aforementioned 'teen horror' basically stems from the belief that Hollywood can reinvent what it's like to be a teenager within their films. This basically takes the form of copious amounts of swearing, randomly botched together sex scenes, and of course, a less than healthy amount of drug abuse.
Whoever it is who commented the film was 'Terrifying' should be strapped into a chair and forced to watch the film, while their eyes are being held open with matchsticks and iodine to see how very wrong they were. At best, it's pretty funny, in that kind of B movie 'it's so bad you gotta laugh' way.
Really you sit through around about an hour and a half of non-sensical tripe, which takes place almost solely in a dark wood. This really just involves people just getting worked up about an almost non-existant 'virus' before then being convinced everyone else has it, and so from there killing each other in an amateur gore 'the more blood the better' way.
It draws it's inspiration from things like 'The Blair Witch Project', though mainly only the setting and also Brit film 'The Hole'. It cobbles the inspirations together in a tacky, clumsy way that really means everything's just disjointed. Above all else, Cabin Fever makes you want to go and give your nose a work out in the electric pencil sharpener.
It's special & sound effects are probably the best bit of the film, and they're average at best. They've got the usual 'racy' horror tones but they come on at the worst times and never actually suit the action. Likewise the special effects aren't of a particularly good standard.
Avoid, lest ye cry salty tears of remorse
Ah, where to begin. Cabin Fever. My least favourite film of all time, it has to be said. The most 'terrifying' thing about the whole film is that I actually wasted money on the thing.
Don't get we wrong, I'm well aware on the front cover some adle-brained critic who's probably never actually seen the thing has been quoted saying, 'Scary As Hell'. Well watching the film all I could think of was [insert horror here] as I've genuinely been more shocked by what goes on in my town centre than I have by this limp-lettuce attempt at a horror film.
What makes it so bad, as well as the reason I should have hurried past wearing a nosepeg, is that it's a 'teen horror'. Meh I thought at the time I bought it, after all, The Blair Witch is a bit of a teen horror and it has a pretty massive fanbase ... Oh no. Oh dear god, no. This really really means 'teen horror'.
You can only grimace as you sit through a plot where first a group of teens all head off to a remote cabin [did someone say cliche?] for "sex, drugs and alcohol". Right, just about bearable. Then on the way, for no apparent reason, they meet a boy outside a service station who enjoys biting people; whose only purpose seems to be to confuse the hell out of you and allow his father to 'warn' the group. Hmm. From there you whoop in delight as the teens eventually start dropping like flies; becoming paranoid of each other, due to this 'killer in the woods', they subsequently abandon all plot lines to beat each other around the heads with spades.
To it's credit, the way the characters actually die isn't what you expect - so there is some form of twist in its otherwise atrocious plot. Not enough to save Cabin Fever by a long shot. This aforementioned 'teen horror' basically stems from the belief that Hollywood can reinvent what it's like to be a teenager within their films. This basically takes the form of copious amounts of swearing, randomly botched together sex scenes, and of course, a less than healthy amount of drug abuse.
Whoever it is who commented the film was 'Terrifying' should be strapped into a chair and forced to watch the film, while their eyes are being held open with matchsticks and iodine to see how very wrong they were. At best, it's pretty funny, in that kind of B movie 'it's so bad you gotta laugh' way.
Really you sit through around about an hour and a half of non-sensical tripe, which takes place almost solely in a dark wood. This really just involves people just getting worked up about an almost non-existant 'virus' before then being convinced everyone else has it, and so from there killing each other in an amateur gore 'the more blood the better' way.
It draws it's inspiration from things like 'The Blair Witch Project', though mainly only the setting and also Brit film 'The Hole'. It cobbles the inspirations together in a tacky, clumsy way that really means everything's just disjointed. Above all else, Cabin Fever makes you want to go and give your nose a work out in the electric pencil sharpener.
It's special & sound effects are probably the best bit of the film, and they're average at best. They've got the usual 'racy' horror tones but they come on at the worst times and never actually suit the action. Likewise the special effects aren't of a particularly good standard.
Avoid, lest ye cry salty tears of remorse