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Although the recent console price war has seen a dramatic change in console prices, consoles and their games are still relatively dear. With no alternatives like Nintony or Micrendo us gamers have to then turn to Sony’s, Nintendo’s or Microsoft’s consoles for gaming thrills. So what happens if you can’t afford these but you still want the same gaming experiences? Well here is my guide to get alternative gaming thrills at a fraction of the price.
*Burnout*
This one is pretty simple. All you will need is a parachute and a bit of rope. You can easily make the parachute out of an old tablecloth, and for the rope, well just look around a bit. It’s not too hard to find. Once you have these, attach the parachute to the rope then go and find a car. Wait for the owner to come back and if it’s a women then bingo! You have all you need. When she isn’t looking attach the rope to the rear bumper of her car and wait. Now as she accelerates off grab the rope and hang on tight! Hopefully the parachute should send you Para sending into the air to give you that authentic ‘behind car view’. If you wanted the bumper view then you don’t need the parachute, just use the rope to tightly strap your self the front grill and pour some tomato ketchup all over you so you are mistaken for a road kill. Now then. As the women drives away I would advise you to hold on. Hopefully if you picked the ‘usual women driver’ then you should be in for a scary ride. Skipping red lights, playing chicken with a Double-Decker bus, and frequent misses of the clutch will be in store for you. Just like Burnout!!
Cheapest cost of real Burnout-
PS2- £199.99
Game- £33.99
Total- £233.98
OR
Game Cube- £146.99
Game- £34.99
Total- £181.99
Cheapest cost of Naths alternative-
Tablecloth/parachute- Free
Rope- Free
Women driver and car- Free
Total- Free (Apart from the nutrients lost due to the reappearance of your breakfast)
*GTA3*
First things first. You’ll need a car. Yes, they are expensive, but not if you follow my guide. Go to a multi-storey car park first. Now look around. Among the Volvos and Fords there should be a half decent BMW. Now smash the window and break your way in. At this point you shouldn’t feel guilt, the chances are it’s already been nicked if it’s a BM. Now hotwire the car and drive off recklessly taking out as many car headlights as possible. This should make you feel like a real criminal. Yeah! Now speed down the ramps and out of the car park taking dear care of any pedestrians that block your way (The running over bit comes later). Pull up and look in the glove compartment for the A-Z. Locate the nearest play park and drive there with your middle finger stuck out of the window the whole way. As you approach the park be careful due to local gangs. Search around a bit and the chances are you will stumble among a posse anyway. Now this is your chance to really feel unlawful. Break off a tree branch and approach the baseball cap wearing ‘leader’. Swing the branch around viciously making sure you don’t awake the local urchin. Once all the hard guys are flattened return to your car. Now you’re a real immoral criminal with enough kudos and now you have earned the right to run over them pedestrians!
Cheapest cost of real GTA3-
PS2- £199.99
Game- £27.99
Total- £227.98
Cheapest cost of Naths alternative-
Car- Free
Tree branch- Free
Prison sentence- Depends on how seriously you take this guide
Total- Again, depends on how seriously you take this guide
*Prisoner Of War*
If you took the last one seriously the chances are you have been put in prison. Well done! You get a bonus game! This ones ‘Prisoner or War’ but without the nazis. Ok, you’re going to have to talk around a bit with the other prisoners, get to know the place ect. Best thing to do here is work a way to get out but make sure you go past the weapon store on the way so you can pick a bit of Arsenal to unlock yet another bonus game!
Cheapest cost of real Prisoner Of War-
PS2- £199.99
Game- £34.99
Total- £234.98
Cheapest cost of Naths alternative-
Completely free! In fact, you might even get a PS2 chucked into your cell! It comes as standard in prisons today.
*State Of Emergency*
If you followed the last guide well you should have picked up some nice artillery (Failing that a couple of fireworks will do). Now go take your weapons and get lost in a crowd of annoying shoppers. When you have had enough of ‘Oh I just gotta have that top!” and feel the need to kill, get your weaponry out (Or Catherine wheel) and let rip. Try and take out as many things as possible. Below is a point-scoring chart so you can keep track of your rampage!
Broken Window-50 points!!
Exploded Vehicle- 250 points!!
Decapitated Leg- 500 points!!
Decapitated Arm- 500 points!!
Decapitated Hand- 600 points!!
Decapitated Foot- 600 points!!
Decapitated Head- 1000 points!!
Fried Thorax- 2000 points!!
Fried Abdomen- 2000 points!!
Fried Head- 2000 points!!
Cheapest cost of real State Of Emergency-
PS2- £199.99
Game- £33.99
Total- £233.98
Cheapest cost of Naths alternative-
Guns- Free if you did the Prisoner of War bit
Fireworks- Free (Make them yourself they’re more deadly that way)
Total- Free (May also cost you an arm and a leg)
*FIFA 2002*
If Karl Powers can do it, why cant you! In fact this part of the guide was written with help from Karl Powers! First pick your team. For cheaper travel costs a local team is more suitable. Next get yourself over to their stadium (Or shed if you’re a Leicester fan). Now your Prisoner Of War skills should come in handy here. Sneak into the changing rooms and steal one of the kits (Liverpool fans, leave Owens alone, he’ll cry and his mummy will smack you). When the match is ready to start hop over the Lucozade hoardings and on to the hallowed turf. Now you’re ready to play! We do apologise however to Crystal Palace fans. As this is a FIFA replication you would expect every shot to go on target. However if Ade Akinbiyi is playing you aren’t offered the full FIFA experience. We do apologise for any inconvenience here.
Cheapest cost of real FIFA 2002-
PS2- £199.99
Game- £38.99
Total- £238.98
Cheapest cost of Naths alternative-
Kit- Free
Attending- Free (Unless you get caught. Man Utd fans could be forced to pay any thing up to £100 pound for attendance per match!)
That’s it. Please don’t try following this guide. Well, unless you really are desperate.
Thanks for reading, Nath.
*Burnout*
This one is pretty simple. All you will need is a parachute and a bit of rope. You can easily make the parachute out of an old tablecloth, and for the rope, well just look around a bit. It’s not too hard to find. Once you have these, attach the parachute to the rope then go and find a car. Wait for the owner to come back and if it’s a women then bingo! You have all you need. When she isn’t looking attach the rope to the rear bumper of her car and wait. Now as she accelerates off grab the rope and hang on tight! Hopefully the parachute should send you Para sending into the air to give you that authentic ‘behind car view’. If you wanted the bumper view then you don’t need the parachute, just use the rope to tightly strap your self the front grill and pour some tomato ketchup all over you so you are mistaken for a road kill. Now then. As the women drives away I would advise you to hold on. Hopefully if you picked the ‘usual women driver’ then you should be in for a scary ride. Skipping red lights, playing chicken with a Double-Decker bus, and frequent misses of the clutch will be in store for you. Just like Burnout!!
Cheapest cost of real Burnout-
PS2- £199.99
Game- £33.99
Total- £233.98
OR
Game Cube- £146.99
Game- £34.99
Total- £181.99
Cheapest cost of Naths alternative-
Tablecloth/parachute- Free
Rope- Free
Women driver and car- Free
Total- Free (Apart from the nutrients lost due to the reappearance of your breakfast)
*GTA3*
First things first. You’ll need a car. Yes, they are expensive, but not if you follow my guide. Go to a multi-storey car park first. Now look around. Among the Volvos and Fords there should be a half decent BMW. Now smash the window and break your way in. At this point you shouldn’t feel guilt, the chances are it’s already been nicked if it’s a BM. Now hotwire the car and drive off recklessly taking out as many car headlights as possible. This should make you feel like a real criminal. Yeah! Now speed down the ramps and out of the car park taking dear care of any pedestrians that block your way (The running over bit comes later). Pull up and look in the glove compartment for the A-Z. Locate the nearest play park and drive there with your middle finger stuck out of the window the whole way. As you approach the park be careful due to local gangs. Search around a bit and the chances are you will stumble among a posse anyway. Now this is your chance to really feel unlawful. Break off a tree branch and approach the baseball cap wearing ‘leader’. Swing the branch around viciously making sure you don’t awake the local urchin. Once all the hard guys are flattened return to your car. Now you’re a real immoral criminal with enough kudos and now you have earned the right to run over them pedestrians!
Cheapest cost of real GTA3-
PS2- £199.99
Game- £27.99
Total- £227.98
Cheapest cost of Naths alternative-
Car- Free
Tree branch- Free
Prison sentence- Depends on how seriously you take this guide
Total- Again, depends on how seriously you take this guide
*Prisoner Of War*
If you took the last one seriously the chances are you have been put in prison. Well done! You get a bonus game! This ones ‘Prisoner or War’ but without the nazis. Ok, you’re going to have to talk around a bit with the other prisoners, get to know the place ect. Best thing to do here is work a way to get out but make sure you go past the weapon store on the way so you can pick a bit of Arsenal to unlock yet another bonus game!
Cheapest cost of real Prisoner Of War-
PS2- £199.99
Game- £34.99
Total- £234.98
Cheapest cost of Naths alternative-
Completely free! In fact, you might even get a PS2 chucked into your cell! It comes as standard in prisons today.
*State Of Emergency*
If you followed the last guide well you should have picked up some nice artillery (Failing that a couple of fireworks will do). Now go take your weapons and get lost in a crowd of annoying shoppers. When you have had enough of ‘Oh I just gotta have that top!” and feel the need to kill, get your weaponry out (Or Catherine wheel) and let rip. Try and take out as many things as possible. Below is a point-scoring chart so you can keep track of your rampage!
Broken Window-50 points!!
Exploded Vehicle- 250 points!!
Decapitated Leg- 500 points!!
Decapitated Arm- 500 points!!
Decapitated Hand- 600 points!!
Decapitated Foot- 600 points!!
Decapitated Head- 1000 points!!
Fried Thorax- 2000 points!!
Fried Abdomen- 2000 points!!
Fried Head- 2000 points!!
Cheapest cost of real State Of Emergency-
PS2- £199.99
Game- £33.99
Total- £233.98
Cheapest cost of Naths alternative-
Guns- Free if you did the Prisoner of War bit
Fireworks- Free (Make them yourself they’re more deadly that way)
Total- Free (May also cost you an arm and a leg)
*FIFA 2002*
If Karl Powers can do it, why cant you! In fact this part of the guide was written with help from Karl Powers! First pick your team. For cheaper travel costs a local team is more suitable. Next get yourself over to their stadium (Or shed if you’re a Leicester fan). Now your Prisoner Of War skills should come in handy here. Sneak into the changing rooms and steal one of the kits (Liverpool fans, leave Owens alone, he’ll cry and his mummy will smack you). When the match is ready to start hop over the Lucozade hoardings and on to the hallowed turf. Now you’re ready to play! We do apologise however to Crystal Palace fans. As this is a FIFA replication you would expect every shot to go on target. However if Ade Akinbiyi is playing you aren’t offered the full FIFA experience. We do apologise for any inconvenience here.
Cheapest cost of real FIFA 2002-
PS2- £199.99
Game- £38.99
Total- £238.98
Cheapest cost of Naths alternative-
Kit- Free
Attending- Free (Unless you get caught. Man Utd fans could be forced to pay any thing up to £100 pound for attendance per match!)
That’s it. Please don’t try following this guide. Well, unless you really are desperate.
Thanks for reading, Nath.
Thanks again :)
man, you've really cheered me up. Good job on winning that GAD!
Thanks. I got a post brewing but Sr is a bit corrupt and NTL broadband is playing up in our area so i'll do it when i can,
well done man on your win. Keep the good posts coming
Thaks matey!
Well done on the win!!
Cheers. I want to try the FIFA one :D It must be quite funny doing what Karl Powers does. I still laugh at Nicky Butts face when he see's Karl linig up with them :D heh heh
Good post there Nath - I hope you havn't been trying out all those alternatives though.
I guess if you dissapear from the forum's we will know that you have been.
I guess if you dissapear from the forum's we will know that you have been.
ha ha, Nice one natbuc. Although i would prefer the honest way. Buy a ps2 and get on with it. After all, i was arrested for car theft and it's not pretty. P.S, i was innocent.
Although the recent console price war has seen a dramatic change in console prices, consoles and their games are still relatively dear. With no alternatives like Nintony or Micrendo us gamers have to then turn to Sony’s, Nintendo’s or Microsoft’s consoles for gaming thrills. So what happens if you can’t afford these but you still want the same gaming experiences? Well here is my guide to get alternative gaming thrills at a fraction of the price.
*Burnout*
This one is pretty simple. All you will need is a parachute and a bit of rope. You can easily make the parachute out of an old tablecloth, and for the rope, well just look around a bit. It’s not too hard to find. Once you have these, attach the parachute to the rope then go and find a car. Wait for the owner to come back and if it’s a women then bingo! You have all you need. When she isn’t looking attach the rope to the rear bumper of her car and wait. Now as she accelerates off grab the rope and hang on tight! Hopefully the parachute should send you Para sending into the air to give you that authentic ‘behind car view’. If you wanted the bumper view then you don’t need the parachute, just use the rope to tightly strap your self the front grill and pour some tomato ketchup all over you so you are mistaken for a road kill. Now then. As the women drives away I would advise you to hold on. Hopefully if you picked the ‘usual women driver’ then you should be in for a scary ride. Skipping red lights, playing chicken with a Double-Decker bus, and frequent misses of the clutch will be in store for you. Just like Burnout!!
Cheapest cost of real Burnout-
PS2- £199.99
Game- £33.99
Total- £233.98
OR
Game Cube- £146.99
Game- £34.99
Total- £181.99
Cheapest cost of Naths alternative-
Tablecloth/parachute- Free
Rope- Free
Women driver and car- Free
Total- Free (Apart from the nutrients lost due to the reappearance of your breakfast)
*GTA3*
First things first. You’ll need a car. Yes, they are expensive, but not if you follow my guide. Go to a multi-storey car park first. Now look around. Among the Volvos and Fords there should be a half decent BMW. Now smash the window and break your way in. At this point you shouldn’t feel guilt, the chances are it’s already been nicked if it’s a BM. Now hotwire the car and drive off recklessly taking out as many car headlights as possible. This should make you feel like a real criminal. Yeah! Now speed down the ramps and out of the car park taking dear care of any pedestrians that block your way (The running over bit comes later). Pull up and look in the glove compartment for the A-Z. Locate the nearest play park and drive there with your middle finger stuck out of the window the whole way. As you approach the park be careful due to local gangs. Search around a bit and the chances are you will stumble among a posse anyway. Now this is your chance to really feel unlawful. Break off a tree branch and approach the baseball cap wearing ‘leader’. Swing the branch around viciously making sure you don’t awake the local urchin. Once all the hard guys are flattened return to your car. Now you’re a real immoral criminal with enough kudos and now you have earned the right to run over them pedestrians!
Cheapest cost of real GTA3-
PS2- £199.99
Game- £27.99
Total- £227.98
Cheapest cost of Naths alternative-
Car- Free
Tree branch- Free
Prison sentence- Depends on how seriously you take this guide
Total- Again, depends on how seriously you take this guide
*Prisoner Of War*
If you took the last one seriously the chances are you have been put in prison. Well done! You get a bonus game! This ones ‘Prisoner or War’ but without the nazis. Ok, you’re going to have to talk around a bit with the other prisoners, get to know the place ect. Best thing to do here is work a way to get out but make sure you go past the weapon store on the way so you can pick a bit of Arsenal to unlock yet another bonus game!
Cheapest cost of real Prisoner Of War-
PS2- £199.99
Game- £34.99
Total- £234.98
Cheapest cost of Naths alternative-
Completely free! In fact, you might even get a PS2 chucked into your cell! It comes as standard in prisons today.
*State Of Emergency*
If you followed the last guide well you should have picked up some nice artillery (Failing that a couple of fireworks will do). Now go take your weapons and get lost in a crowd of annoying shoppers. When you have had enough of ‘Oh I just gotta have that top!” and feel the need to kill, get your weaponry out (Or Catherine wheel) and let rip. Try and take out as many things as possible. Below is a point-scoring chart so you can keep track of your rampage!
Broken Window-50 points!!
Exploded Vehicle- 250 points!!
Decapitated Leg- 500 points!!
Decapitated Arm- 500 points!!
Decapitated Hand- 600 points!!
Decapitated Foot- 600 points!!
Decapitated Head- 1000 points!!
Fried Thorax- 2000 points!!
Fried Abdomen- 2000 points!!
Fried Head- 2000 points!!
Cheapest cost of real State Of Emergency-
PS2- £199.99
Game- £33.99
Total- £233.98
Cheapest cost of Naths alternative-
Guns- Free if you did the Prisoner of War bit
Fireworks- Free (Make them yourself they’re more deadly that way)
Total- Free (May also cost you an arm and a leg)
*FIFA 2002*
If Karl Powers can do it, why cant you! In fact this part of the guide was written with help from Karl Powers! First pick your team. For cheaper travel costs a local team is more suitable. Next get yourself over to their stadium (Or shed if you’re a Leicester fan). Now your Prisoner Of War skills should come in handy here. Sneak into the changing rooms and steal one of the kits (Liverpool fans, leave Owens alone, he’ll cry and his mummy will smack you). When the match is ready to start hop over the Lucozade hoardings and on to the hallowed turf. Now you’re ready to play! We do apologise however to Crystal Palace fans. As this is a FIFA replication you would expect every shot to go on target. However if Ade Akinbiyi is playing you aren’t offered the full FIFA experience. We do apologise for any inconvenience here.
Cheapest cost of real FIFA 2002-
PS2- £199.99
Game- £38.99
Total- £238.98
Cheapest cost of Naths alternative-
Kit- Free
Attending- Free (Unless you get caught. Man Utd fans could be forced to pay any thing up to £100 pound for attendance per match!)
That’s it. Please don’t try following this guide. Well, unless you really are desperate.
Thanks for reading, Nath.
*Burnout*
This one is pretty simple. All you will need is a parachute and a bit of rope. You can easily make the parachute out of an old tablecloth, and for the rope, well just look around a bit. It’s not too hard to find. Once you have these, attach the parachute to the rope then go and find a car. Wait for the owner to come back and if it’s a women then bingo! You have all you need. When she isn’t looking attach the rope to the rear bumper of her car and wait. Now as she accelerates off grab the rope and hang on tight! Hopefully the parachute should send you Para sending into the air to give you that authentic ‘behind car view’. If you wanted the bumper view then you don’t need the parachute, just use the rope to tightly strap your self the front grill and pour some tomato ketchup all over you so you are mistaken for a road kill. Now then. As the women drives away I would advise you to hold on. Hopefully if you picked the ‘usual women driver’ then you should be in for a scary ride. Skipping red lights, playing chicken with a Double-Decker bus, and frequent misses of the clutch will be in store for you. Just like Burnout!!
Cheapest cost of real Burnout-
PS2- £199.99
Game- £33.99
Total- £233.98
OR
Game Cube- £146.99
Game- £34.99
Total- £181.99
Cheapest cost of Naths alternative-
Tablecloth/parachute- Free
Rope- Free
Women driver and car- Free
Total- Free (Apart from the nutrients lost due to the reappearance of your breakfast)
*GTA3*
First things first. You’ll need a car. Yes, they are expensive, but not if you follow my guide. Go to a multi-storey car park first. Now look around. Among the Volvos and Fords there should be a half decent BMW. Now smash the window and break your way in. At this point you shouldn’t feel guilt, the chances are it’s already been nicked if it’s a BM. Now hotwire the car and drive off recklessly taking out as many car headlights as possible. This should make you feel like a real criminal. Yeah! Now speed down the ramps and out of the car park taking dear care of any pedestrians that block your way (The running over bit comes later). Pull up and look in the glove compartment for the A-Z. Locate the nearest play park and drive there with your middle finger stuck out of the window the whole way. As you approach the park be careful due to local gangs. Search around a bit and the chances are you will stumble among a posse anyway. Now this is your chance to really feel unlawful. Break off a tree branch and approach the baseball cap wearing ‘leader’. Swing the branch around viciously making sure you don’t awake the local urchin. Once all the hard guys are flattened return to your car. Now you’re a real immoral criminal with enough kudos and now you have earned the right to run over them pedestrians!
Cheapest cost of real GTA3-
PS2- £199.99
Game- £27.99
Total- £227.98
Cheapest cost of Naths alternative-
Car- Free
Tree branch- Free
Prison sentence- Depends on how seriously you take this guide
Total- Again, depends on how seriously you take this guide
*Prisoner Of War*
If you took the last one seriously the chances are you have been put in prison. Well done! You get a bonus game! This ones ‘Prisoner or War’ but without the nazis. Ok, you’re going to have to talk around a bit with the other prisoners, get to know the place ect. Best thing to do here is work a way to get out but make sure you go past the weapon store on the way so you can pick a bit of Arsenal to unlock yet another bonus game!
Cheapest cost of real Prisoner Of War-
PS2- £199.99
Game- £34.99
Total- £234.98
Cheapest cost of Naths alternative-
Completely free! In fact, you might even get a PS2 chucked into your cell! It comes as standard in prisons today.
*State Of Emergency*
If you followed the last guide well you should have picked up some nice artillery (Failing that a couple of fireworks will do). Now go take your weapons and get lost in a crowd of annoying shoppers. When you have had enough of ‘Oh I just gotta have that top!” and feel the need to kill, get your weaponry out (Or Catherine wheel) and let rip. Try and take out as many things as possible. Below is a point-scoring chart so you can keep track of your rampage!
Broken Window-50 points!!
Exploded Vehicle- 250 points!!
Decapitated Leg- 500 points!!
Decapitated Arm- 500 points!!
Decapitated Hand- 600 points!!
Decapitated Foot- 600 points!!
Decapitated Head- 1000 points!!
Fried Thorax- 2000 points!!
Fried Abdomen- 2000 points!!
Fried Head- 2000 points!!
Cheapest cost of real State Of Emergency-
PS2- £199.99
Game- £33.99
Total- £233.98
Cheapest cost of Naths alternative-
Guns- Free if you did the Prisoner of War bit
Fireworks- Free (Make them yourself they’re more deadly that way)
Total- Free (May also cost you an arm and a leg)
*FIFA 2002*
If Karl Powers can do it, why cant you! In fact this part of the guide was written with help from Karl Powers! First pick your team. For cheaper travel costs a local team is more suitable. Next get yourself over to their stadium (Or shed if you’re a Leicester fan). Now your Prisoner Of War skills should come in handy here. Sneak into the changing rooms and steal one of the kits (Liverpool fans, leave Owens alone, he’ll cry and his mummy will smack you). When the match is ready to start hop over the Lucozade hoardings and on to the hallowed turf. Now you’re ready to play! We do apologise however to Crystal Palace fans. As this is a FIFA replication you would expect every shot to go on target. However if Ade Akinbiyi is playing you aren’t offered the full FIFA experience. We do apologise for any inconvenience here.
Cheapest cost of real FIFA 2002-
PS2- £199.99
Game- £38.99
Total- £238.98
Cheapest cost of Naths alternative-
Kit- Free
Attending- Free (Unless you get caught. Man Utd fans could be forced to pay any thing up to £100 pound for attendance per match!)
That’s it. Please don’t try following this guide. Well, unless you really are desperate.
Thanks for reading, Nath.