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Its getting better now, the clouds are moving away. I let it happen before though, I smiled at them disappearing over the horizon but when I turned for the warmth I was hit once again by another huge storm.
This time I shall make it different. I have grown so much and I know I have meaning. Dreaming is now my very essence during the day, I don't care who or what I dream about, it keeps me going, running smoothly along that fine line before insanity.
Today in college I nearly broke, something happened. A group of mates were joking around about someone I deeply care about. They 'were' only joking, yet I saw true red. A place I never wanted to be again so I ran myself to a dark area, to hide from myself. Strange that, now I don't run to gaming, I run to the darkest area and just stand staring into the light. I prepare myself once again before I step out.
I looked in the mirror then and I saw scars.
I look in the mirror now and I see hope.
I don't care what you say, I admire myself more than near any person. I have been to my own hell and managed to create a ladder from nothing and slowly climb back out. It hasn't been easy, I have hurt myself probably more than others.
Seventeen years to this, how many more years till bliss?
This time I shall make it different. I have grown so much and I know I have meaning. Dreaming is now my very essence during the day, I don't care who or what I dream about, it keeps me going, running smoothly along that fine line before insanity.
Today in college I nearly broke, something happened. A group of mates were joking around about someone I deeply care about. They 'were' only joking, yet I saw true red. A place I never wanted to be again so I ran myself to a dark area, to hide from myself. Strange that, now I don't run to gaming, I run to the darkest area and just stand staring into the light. I prepare myself once again before I step out.
I looked in the mirror then and I saw scars.
I look in the mirror now and I see hope.
I don't care what you say, I admire myself more than near any person. I have been to my own hell and managed to create a ladder from nothing and slowly climb back out. It hasn't been easy, I have hurt myself probably more than others.
Seventeen years to this, how many more years till bliss?
Thanks Gangsta.
Seriously. Thanks.
Seriously. Thanks.
er-no wrote:
> I don't care what you say, I admire myself more than near any person.
> I have been to my own hell and managed to create a ladder from nothing
> and slowly climb back out. It hasn't been easy, I have hurt myself
> probably more than others.
I like this.
A lot.
Somehow finding that strength from somewhere - strength you thought you never had as you were just about to give up.
Keep climbing that ladder - one day you'll find your heaven, your paradise. You'll have left everyone who has been dragging you down back there in hell. You will be a million times stronger than they could ever dream of being.
> I don't care what you say, I admire myself more than near any person.
> I have been to my own hell and managed to create a ladder from nothing
> and slowly climb back out. It hasn't been easy, I have hurt myself
> probably more than others.
I like this.
A lot.
Somehow finding that strength from somewhere - strength you thought you never had as you were just about to give up.
Keep climbing that ladder - one day you'll find your heaven, your paradise. You'll have left everyone who has been dragging you down back there in hell. You will be a million times stronger than they could ever dream of being.
Again, bar Cyclone. I hate idiotic replies.
er-no wrote:
> I hate idiot replies.
LOL :P
> I hate idiot replies.
LOL :P
er-no wrote:
> would you believe I had an eye infection.
---
What if God smoked cannabis?
:D
> would you believe I had an eye infection.
---
What if God smoked cannabis?
:D
Dreaming and not-breaking are the two things that take up my days mostly now. I have never actualy 'seen red' and either got very angry or ran, but I think I have come very close several times.
I hate idiot replies.
Ok so did you actually have an eye infection?
Its getting better now, the clouds are moving away. I let it happen before though, I smiled at them disappearing over the horizon but when I turned for the warmth I was hit once again by another huge storm.
This time I shall make it different. I have grown so much and I know I have meaning. Dreaming is now my very essence during the day, I don't care who or what I dream about, it keeps me going, running smoothly along that fine line before insanity.
Today in college I nearly broke, something happened. A group of mates were joking around about someone I deeply care about. They 'were' only joking, yet I saw true red. A place I never wanted to be again so I ran myself to a dark area, to hide from myself. Strange that, now I don't run to gaming, I run to the darkest area and just stand staring into the light. I prepare myself once again before I step out.
I looked in the mirror then and I saw scars.
I look in the mirror now and I see hope.
I don't care what you say, I admire myself more than near any person. I have been to my own hell and managed to create a ladder from nothing and slowly climb back out. It hasn't been easy, I have hurt myself probably more than others.
Seventeen years to this, how many more years till bliss?
This time I shall make it different. I have grown so much and I know I have meaning. Dreaming is now my very essence during the day, I don't care who or what I dream about, it keeps me going, running smoothly along that fine line before insanity.
Today in college I nearly broke, something happened. A group of mates were joking around about someone I deeply care about. They 'were' only joking, yet I saw true red. A place I never wanted to be again so I ran myself to a dark area, to hide from myself. Strange that, now I don't run to gaming, I run to the darkest area and just stand staring into the light. I prepare myself once again before I step out.
I looked in the mirror then and I saw scars.
I look in the mirror now and I see hope.
I don't care what you say, I admire myself more than near any person. I have been to my own hell and managed to create a ladder from nothing and slowly climb back out. It hasn't been easy, I have hurt myself probably more than others.
Seventeen years to this, how many more years till bliss?