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1: Take everything that was good about the original and then “Hollywood” it to death. Everyone in the film must be wearing pristine clothing at all times and have brand name “mud” applied to their faces by a renowned make-up artist, when they have to appear dirty. The more ludicrous the casting the better. Then call it a “re-imagining”. Include the stupidest ending you can possibly think off (If you gave a million monkeys a million years to come up with something this stupid they wouldn’t- oops gave the game away there).
2: Reduce the rating to a 12, thus removing any credibility of the film from the outset, given the ferocity of the original. Add a stupid kid (for the kids) and annoying sidekicks (with large doses of political correctness). Include a scene where the kid walks up to a Robot sentry that ACTUALLY ALLOWS THE KID TO OPEN IT’S CIRCUIT ACCESS PANEL, PLUG IN A LAPTOP AND ALTER IT’S PROGRAMMING WITHOUT SHOOTING THE LITTLE MADAM. Add stupid new gadgets for main protagonist (different “actor” to boot) and for merchandising purposes. Everyone gets shot in the leg a lot.
3: Again reduce the rating so that any adult humour is unachievable and add a bloke, who can’t speak properly, to amuse the simpletons. Simplify the characters to their basest levels. A big bloke who does funny strong things, a quiet women who shouts loudly to highly comedic effect, a rebel who hilariously rebels and some bloke who makes “funny noises”. The next film is subtitled: Kid cops in Academy High do make some weak jokes about having to use special water pistols and chocolate handcuffs one of them will fall over a lot and one of them is called "stupid noises junior" 69.
4: Introduce the most annoying character EVER to grace our consciousness. Even Scrappy Do would refuse to hang out with this Shrub Rocketeer.
5: Repeat the original scene for scene, then kill big fish by getting it to eat electricity!!??!!
6: Add Rick Moranis.
Answers on a postcard please, unless anyone can think of an easier way of replying.
2: Reduce the rating to a 12, thus removing any credibility of the film from the outset, given the ferocity of the original. Add a stupid kid (for the kids) and annoying sidekicks (with large doses of political correctness). Include a scene where the kid walks up to a Robot sentry that ACTUALLY ALLOWS THE KID TO OPEN IT’S CIRCUIT ACCESS PANEL, PLUG IN A LAPTOP AND ALTER IT’S PROGRAMMING WITHOUT SHOOTING THE LITTLE MADAM. Add stupid new gadgets for main protagonist (different “actor” to boot) and for merchandising purposes. Everyone gets shot in the leg a lot.
3: Again reduce the rating so that any adult humour is unachievable and add a bloke, who can’t speak properly, to amuse the simpletons. Simplify the characters to their basest levels. A big bloke who does funny strong things, a quiet women who shouts loudly to highly comedic effect, a rebel who hilariously rebels and some bloke who makes “funny noises”. The next film is subtitled: Kid cops in Academy High do make some weak jokes about having to use special water pistols and chocolate handcuffs one of them will fall over a lot and one of them is called "stupid noises junior" 69.
4: Introduce the most annoying character EVER to grace our consciousness. Even Scrappy Do would refuse to hang out with this Shrub Rocketeer.
5: Repeat the original scene for scene, then kill big fish by getting it to eat electricity!!??!!
6: Add Rick Moranis.
Answers on a postcard please, unless anyone can think of an easier way of replying.
Yup! The last was a trick question and you could put what you liked!
100% or 6/6, by the football managers scale that's almost full marks...
100% or 6/6, by the football managers scale that's almost full marks...
4/6 not bad.
1: Blair Witch 2?
2: Robocop 3?
3: Police Academy x?
4: Star Wars 1?
5: Jaws 4?
6: Little Shop of Horrors?
2: Robocop 3?
3: Police Academy x?
4: Star Wars 1?
5: Jaws 4?
6: Little Shop of Horrors?
1: Take everything that was good about the original and then “Hollywood” it to death. Everyone in the film must be wearing pristine clothing at all times and have brand name “mud” applied to their faces by a renowned make-up artist, when they have to appear dirty. The more ludicrous the casting the better. Then call it a “re-imagining”. Include the stupidest ending you can possibly think off (If you gave a million monkeys a million years to come up with something this stupid they wouldn’t- oops gave the game away there).
2: Reduce the rating to a 12, thus removing any credibility of the film from the outset, given the ferocity of the original. Add a stupid kid (for the kids) and annoying sidekicks (with large doses of political correctness). Include a scene where the kid walks up to a Robot sentry that ACTUALLY ALLOWS THE KID TO OPEN IT’S CIRCUIT ACCESS PANEL, PLUG IN A LAPTOP AND ALTER IT’S PROGRAMMING WITHOUT SHOOTING THE LITTLE MADAM. Add stupid new gadgets for main protagonist (different “actor” to boot) and for merchandising purposes. Everyone gets shot in the leg a lot.
3: Again reduce the rating so that any adult humour is unachievable and add a bloke, who can’t speak properly, to amuse the simpletons. Simplify the characters to their basest levels. A big bloke who does funny strong things, a quiet women who shouts loudly to highly comedic effect, a rebel who hilariously rebels and some bloke who makes “funny noises”. The next film is subtitled: Kid cops in Academy High do make some weak jokes about having to use special water pistols and chocolate handcuffs one of them will fall over a lot and one of them is called "stupid noises junior" 69.
4: Introduce the most annoying character EVER to grace our consciousness. Even Scrappy Do would refuse to hang out with this Shrub Rocketeer.
5: Repeat the original scene for scene, then kill big fish by getting it to eat electricity!!??!!
6: Add Rick Moranis.
Answers on a postcard please, unless anyone can think of an easier way of replying.
2: Reduce the rating to a 12, thus removing any credibility of the film from the outset, given the ferocity of the original. Add a stupid kid (for the kids) and annoying sidekicks (with large doses of political correctness). Include a scene where the kid walks up to a Robot sentry that ACTUALLY ALLOWS THE KID TO OPEN IT’S CIRCUIT ACCESS PANEL, PLUG IN A LAPTOP AND ALTER IT’S PROGRAMMING WITHOUT SHOOTING THE LITTLE MADAM. Add stupid new gadgets for main protagonist (different “actor” to boot) and for merchandising purposes. Everyone gets shot in the leg a lot.
3: Again reduce the rating so that any adult humour is unachievable and add a bloke, who can’t speak properly, to amuse the simpletons. Simplify the characters to their basest levels. A big bloke who does funny strong things, a quiet women who shouts loudly to highly comedic effect, a rebel who hilariously rebels and some bloke who makes “funny noises”. The next film is subtitled: Kid cops in Academy High do make some weak jokes about having to use special water pistols and chocolate handcuffs one of them will fall over a lot and one of them is called "stupid noises junior" 69.
4: Introduce the most annoying character EVER to grace our consciousness. Even Scrappy Do would refuse to hang out with this Shrub Rocketeer.
5: Repeat the original scene for scene, then kill big fish by getting it to eat electricity!!??!!
6: Add Rick Moranis.
Answers on a postcard please, unless anyone can think of an easier way of replying.