Viewing Thread:
"Bizzare Commentary Moments"

Feel free to add any amusing or frankly odd commentry lines from the World Cup.

The first one has to go to Clive Tydldesley in England V Sweden, when the camera focuses on Sven Goran Eriksson's worried expression: "A stretching of Swedish head there".

Àshley wrote:
> "Tell the Kraut to get his butt up front. We don't pay a million
> for a guy to hang around in defence."
> -NY Cosmos executive, on Beckenbauer's positioning.
>
> "Two Andy Gorams, there's only two Andy Gorams..."
> - Kilmarnock fans to the Rangers keeper after he had been diagnosed
> with mild schizophrenia.
>
> "That's great, tell him he's Pele and get him back on."
> - John Lambie, Partick Thistle manager, when told a concussed striker
> did not know who he was.

BWAHAHAHAHA! AHAHAHAHAH!

All credit for compiling these quotes to: http://www.chelseafc.com/fan_zone/true_blue/quotes.shtml

there are loads more quotes there. (and don't wory if you think you are degrading yourself as you hate chelsea) it is well worth a visit as there is some comedy stuff in this section and no mention of chelsea. Although obviously i recommend you convert yourself to the blues at the same time as you are there.


"He's pulling him off! The Spanish manager is pulling his captain off!""
- RTE's (Ireland) George Hamilton on Spain manager Luis Suarez's substitution of Butragueno during their world cup qualifier with Ireland in Seville,1992.

"There's nobody fitter at his age, except maybe Raquel Welch"
- Ron Atkinson lauds Gordon Strachan, 39

"If the players want to make it hard for me, I am happy to make it twice as hard for them"
- Wendy Toms, the first female referee to officiate in a professional game

"I know where he should have put his flag up, and he'd have got plenty of help "
- Ron Atkinson at Stamford Bridge

"It took a lot of bottle for Tony to own up"
- Ian Wright on the Arsenal captain's confession to alcoholism


"This is an unusual Scotland side because they have good players "
- praise for the Under-21s from Javier Clemente, Spain's coach


"Love is good for footballers, as long as it is not at half-time "
- Richard Moller Nielsen, Denmark coach

"What I said to them at half time would be unprintable on the radio"
- Gerry Francis

"It's now 1-1, an exact reversal of the score on Saturday."
(Radio 5 Live)

"Richard Keys : Well Roy, do you think that you'll have to finish above Manchester United to win the league ?"
Roy Evans : You have to finish above everyone to win the league Richard.

"If we played like that every week we wouldn't be so inconsistent"
- Bryan Robson, Man U, 1990.

"Tell the Kraut to get his butt up front. We don't pay a million for a guy to hang around in defence."
-NY Cosmos executive, on Beckenbauer's positioning.

"I spent a lot of my money on booze, birds and fast cars. The rest I just squandered"
- George Best.

"Two Andy Gorams, there's only two Andy Gorams..."
- Kilmarnock fans to the Rangers keeper after he had been diagnosed with mild schizophrenia.

"That's great, tell him he's Pele and get him back on."
- John Lambie, Partick Thistle manager, when told a concussed striker did not know who he was.

Foreman wrote:
> MARK VIDUKA "I wouldn't bother if we lost every game as long as
> we won the league"
>
> RONALDO "We lost because we didn't win"
>
> PAUL GASCOIGNE "I've had 14 bookings this season, eight of which
> was my fault but seven of which were disputable" (Can he add
> up?)
>
> ALAN SHEARER "I've never wanted to leave. I'm here for the rest
> of my life, and hopefully after that aswell"
>
> MARK DRAPER "I'd like to play for an Italian club, like
> Barcelona"
>
> STAN COLLYMORE "I faxed a transfer request to the club at the
> beggining of the week. But let me state that I don't want to leave
> Leicester"
>
> ADE AKINBIYI "I was watching TV when it flashed on the screen
> that George (Ndah) had scored in the first minute at Birmingham. My
> first reaction was to ring him up. Then I remembered he was out there
> playing"
>
> IAN WRIGHT "Without being too harsh on David Beckham, he cost us
> the match"
>
> UGO EHIOGU "I'm as happy as can be - but I've been
> happier"
>
> LEE HENDRIE "I took a whack on my left ankle, but something told
> me it was my right"
>
> IAN RUSH "I couldn't settle in Italy. It was like living in a
> foreign country"
>
> BARRY VEISON "I always used to put my right boot on first, and
> then obviously my right sock"
>
> STEVE LOMAS "Germany were a very difficult team to play. They had
> 11 internationals out there today"
>
> THIERRY HENRY "Sometimes in football, you have to score
> goals"
>
> LES FERDINAND "I was surprised, but I always say nothing
> surprises me in football"
>
> GARY LINEKER "Theres no in between. You are either good or bad.
> We were in between"
>
> Thanks for reading these, hope you enjoyed them. Especially Mark
> Draper

HA HA HA. i laughed at most of these especially the mark draper and the gazza one. how stupid do they sound?

Foreman wrote:
> MARK VIDUKA "I wouldn't bother if we lost every game as long as
> we won the league"
>
> RONALDO "We lost because we didn't win"
>
> PAUL GASCOIGNE "I've had 14 bookings this season, eight of which
> was my fault but seven of which were disputable" (Can he add
> up?)
>
> ALAN SHEARER "I've never wanted to leave. I'm here for the rest
> of my life, and hopefully after that aswell"
>
> MARK DRAPER "I'd like to play for an Italian club, like
> Barcelona"
>
> STAN COLLYMORE "I faxed a transfer request to the club at the
> beggining of the week. But let me state that I don't want to leave
> Leicester"
>
> ADE AKINBIYI "I was watching TV when it flashed on the screen
> that George (Ndah) had scored in the first minute at Birmingham. My
> first reaction was to ring him up. Then I remembered he was out there
> playing"
>
> IAN WRIGHT "Without being too harsh on David Beckham, he cost us
> the match"
>
> UGO EHIOGU "I'm as happy as can be - but I've been
> happier"
>
> LEE HENDRIE "I took a whack on my left ankle, but something told
> me it was my right"
>
> IAN RUSH "I couldn't settle in Italy. It was like living in a
> foreign country"
>
> BARRY VEISON "I always used to put my right boot on first, and
> then obviously my right sock"
>
> STEVE LOMAS "Germany were a very difficult team to play. They had
> 11 internationals out there today"
>
> THIERRY HENRY "Sometimes in football, you have to score
> goals"
>
> LES FERDINAND "I was surprised, but I always say nothing
> surprises me in football"
>
> GARY LINEKER "Theres no in between. You are either good or bad.
> We were in between"
>
> Thanks for reading these, hope you enjoyed them. Especially Mark
> Draper

I did enjoy them i liked the Mark Draper one and the Stan Collymore one.

They put a smile on my face. :D

Jonathan Pearce commenting on how the ball was 'squirted out'...THREE TIMES.

MARK VIDUKA "I wouldn't bother if we lost every game as long as we won the league"

RONALDO "We lost because we didn't win"

PAUL GASCOIGNE "I've had 14 bookings this season, eight of which was my fault but seven of which were disputable" (Can he add up?)

ALAN SHEARER "I've never wanted to leave. I'm here for the rest of my life, and hopefully after that aswell"

MARK DRAPER "I'd like to play for an Italian club, like Barcelona"

STAN COLLYMORE "I faxed a transfer request to the club at the beggining of the week. But let me state that I don't want to leave Leicester"

ADE AKINBIYI "I was watching TV when it flashed on the screen that George (Ndah) had scored in the first minute at Birmingham. My first reaction was to ring him up. Then I remembered he was out there playing"

IAN WRIGHT "Without being too harsh on David Beckham, he cost us the match"

UGO EHIOGU "I'm as happy as can be - but I've been happier"

LEE HENDRIE "I took a whack on my left ankle, but something told me it was my right"

IAN RUSH "I couldn't settle in Italy. It was like living in a foreign country"

BARRY VEISON "I always used to put my right boot on first, and then obviously my right sock"

STEVE LOMAS "Germany were a very difficult team to play. They had 11 internationals out there today"

THIERRY HENRY "Sometimes in football, you have to score goals"

LES FERDINAND "I was surprised, but I always say nothing surprises me in football"

GARY LINEKER "Theres no in between. You are either good or bad. We were in between"

Thanks for reading these, hope you enjoyed them. Especially Mark Draper

best quote of the tournament so far, Barthez runs out to clear and miss times and recoba easily beats him to it.

Quote: "Oh no Barthez has done.....well, a barthez"

an absolute classic.

I remember the 1982 world cup in Spain. The host nation were playing and they had a player called Lopez Ufarte. The commentator (might of been Brian Moore) said "And there is a strong wind blowing around they stadium now as Lopez Ufarte takes posession'.

John Motson came out with one just the other day, when commentating on the Mexico game. He said "The trouble with the Mexicans is that they are always comparing their strikers to the incomparable Hugo Sanchez".

My favourites are:

Terry Venables: "Apart from the goals, they haven't scored."

Kevin Keegan: "I know whats around the corner, I just don't know where the corner is"

Kevin Keegan during France '98:

During the Romania game:
Keegan: "......I can only see one team winning this now, and thats england...."

Other commentator (can't remember who it was): "....but wait, here comes Dan Petrescu...". At which point Seaman got nut-megged and we lost 2-1.


During the Argentina Shootout:
Other commentator: "Quickly, do you think he will score"

Keegan: "Yes". At which point David Batty decides to miss the penalty and we were on our way home before you could say Diego Maradonna

One of the ITV commentators when talking about Gary Breen (i think thats what hes called) just said

"I bet he's seen a few Jankers in his time"