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"Shemales"

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Sun 26/05/02 at 21:11
Regular
Posts: 787
I, like many other esteemed members of the world, have MSN Messanger. But one flaw has led to me being hassled by something rather out of the ordinary....

A shemale.

For those of you who are unfamiliar with the term "shemale", I will spell it out for you. A shemale is a person who has the genitals of one sex, but the facial prowess of the opposite sex.

My inexperience with shemales has led me to ask the following questions, and I'd appreciate it if some of you could answer them for me:

-----

When a cruise ship is sinking and it's "women and children first", what do shemales come under?

Do shemales use the ladies, or the gents?

When women were finally allowed to vote, did that include shemales too?

When a shemale has sex, who does the penatration?

If a shemale goes in for a sex change, what the hell does the surgeon do?

If a shemale is a single parent, are they entitled to single mothers' benefits, or single fathers'?

If 2 shemales have sex, what pops out 9 months later?

If a shemale goes into a corner shop, does it buy a Yorkie?

If a shemale falls and there's no-one there to hear it, does it make a sound?

If a shemale is searched for crack, what do the dogs do when they find a sausage too?

Is a shemale's place at home in the kitchen, or at work earning an honest crust?

If a shemale had beaten Neil Armstrong to the moon, would it have been the first man on the moon, or the first woman?

What is a shemale's natural habitat?

Are shemales mythical creatures?

Do shemales use aftershave, or perfume?

Does a shemale start getting its' pension at 60, or 65?

How long can a shemale hold its' breath?

Is a shemale the bride, or the groom?

Does a shemale go to a barber, or a hairdresser?

Are shemales covered by the Data Protection Act?

Is it polite to open a door for a shemale?

Can a shemale be a feminist?

If a shemale goes to buy pornography, which end of the shop does it go to?

----------

Thanks.

Special mention needs to go to Undead and Edgy, as both of them supplied some of the questions listed above.
Sun 26/05/02 at 21:11
Regular
"Remember me?"
Posts: 6,124
I, like many other esteemed members of the world, have MSN Messanger. But one flaw has led to me being hassled by something rather out of the ordinary....

A shemale.

For those of you who are unfamiliar with the term "shemale", I will spell it out for you. A shemale is a person who has the genitals of one sex, but the facial prowess of the opposite sex.

My inexperience with shemales has led me to ask the following questions, and I'd appreciate it if some of you could answer them for me:

-----

When a cruise ship is sinking and it's "women and children first", what do shemales come under?

Do shemales use the ladies, or the gents?

When women were finally allowed to vote, did that include shemales too?

When a shemale has sex, who does the penatration?

If a shemale goes in for a sex change, what the hell does the surgeon do?

If a shemale is a single parent, are they entitled to single mothers' benefits, or single fathers'?

If 2 shemales have sex, what pops out 9 months later?

If a shemale goes into a corner shop, does it buy a Yorkie?

If a shemale falls and there's no-one there to hear it, does it make a sound?

If a shemale is searched for crack, what do the dogs do when they find a sausage too?

Is a shemale's place at home in the kitchen, or at work earning an honest crust?

If a shemale had beaten Neil Armstrong to the moon, would it have been the first man on the moon, or the first woman?

What is a shemale's natural habitat?

Are shemales mythical creatures?

Do shemales use aftershave, or perfume?

Does a shemale start getting its' pension at 60, or 65?

How long can a shemale hold its' breath?

Is a shemale the bride, or the groom?

Does a shemale go to a barber, or a hairdresser?

Are shemales covered by the Data Protection Act?

Is it polite to open a door for a shemale?

Can a shemale be a feminist?

If a shemale goes to buy pornography, which end of the shop does it go to?

----------

Thanks.

Special mention needs to go to Undead and Edgy, as both of them supplied some of the questions listed above.
Sun 26/05/02 at 21:24
Posts: 3,348
If a shemale is searched for crack, what do the dogs do when they find a sausage too?

--------

haha thats comedy. Bit explicit for the forums tho
Sun 26/05/02 at 21:25
Regular
"5 European Cups!!!"
Posts: 5,795
As I said in this topic in the Long Stories Forum, albeit, there, it won't get seen; This is a really funny post :D
Sun 26/05/02 at 23:37
Regular
"95% organic"
Posts: 409
Do shemales need to watch Friends every time it's on TV? Or do they want to watch Scrapheap Challenge instead?
Sun 26/05/02 at 23:41
Regular
Posts: 2,982
Im a shemale saturday nights..... They call me Suzy, sexy Suzy

ahem... anyway, computer games rule.... yeah!
Sun 26/05/02 at 23:43
Regular
Posts: 21,800
He's not lying you know..
Sun 26/05/02 at 23:46
Regular
Posts: 2,982
Dont make me start talking about your mother again....

And anyway, we all know the real reason you came into this topic.... looking for girly-man werent you.
Sun 26/05/02 at 23:54
Regular
Posts: 21,800
Nah your Dad came round earlier and I told him to feck off...
Sun 26/05/02 at 23:56
Regular
"That's right!"
Posts: 10,645
Dav1d wrote:
They call me Suzy, sexy Suzy


-------

Wasn't that a character in Bouncers?

Ironically enough, the character is played by a man
Mon 27/05/02 at 00:00
Regular
Posts: 2,982
What are you dribbling about?

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