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"Slur on!"

I have just arrived home from a meal with my mother for her 44th birthday. I sigh at her sometimes, I really do. We went out, with a couple of her work mates, and my sister, to have a nice meal in the Italian restaurant on the high street.

"Would that be a small or large glass of wine madam?"
"Large!" Blurts out my mother with a strange giggle...
The rest of us are all on soft drinks..

I know what my mother is like when she's drunk. She tells you stuff that you just don't want to know...You can tell she's going to uncover the depths of her dark and seedy past by the way she flounces her hands around as she leans over the table in an inebriated state... She wasn't too bad..seen her worse..But whenever she's like this she always seems to tell me things about her past, about my family's past..

My parents are divorced, I am glad to say. And I live with my Dad, which I am also amazingly glad to say. I am the eldest child (14), my sister is 12. And as I rest my head on my hand, watching my mum's eyes flicker in and out of consciousness, she says :

"Oh, Katie, you were an accident you know.."
"Sorry?"
"When your Dad and I were on the honeymoon...I found out that I was pregnant with you.."
"Er..?"
"Yeah, and I didn't know what to do...see what rushing into children does to marriages....trust me...never have children.."
I look at her in shock...She slurred this to me a while ago...Isn't it wonderful that I know that I was an accident. That I wouldn't even be here if some strange, irregular behaviour by my parents contraception hadn't occurred. Lovely. I was chuffed.

Tonight was full of these fantastic surprises...oh yes. I now know that when I was born..if I was a boy, I would have been called Douglas. (I knew that already, it was just she couldn't remember so told her friends and I again.) Douglas. Guh. Anyway. The delights of the evening continue over a bowl of pasta, she continues to slur out stuff about her Uncle George and how his wife got her nightie stuck in the fire causing her to burn to death.. Fun.
I also found out that when I was around 1 year old, my sister.... a lump....My parents had monetary difficulties which almost drove them to separation. I always knew that my Dad got made redundant when I was around that age...Just didn't know the details...But boy, do I know the details now. How -she- couldn't handle it. How -she- had to go and sit out in the car so that Dad didn't see her upset..and on and on.. Sigh.. I just don't want to know..I really don't...So I shall despair over my mother again..and again..

Slur on oh dear mother of mine.


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Thanks for getting this far. Sorry for the complaining....just had to get it out of my system.. Kiss kiss :-)

I have just arrived home from a meal with my mother for her 44th birthday. I sigh at her sometimes, I really do. We went out, with a couple of her work mates, and my sister, to have a nice meal in the Italian restaurant on the high street.

"Would that be a small or large glass of wine madam?"
"Large!" Blurts out my mother with a strange giggle...
The rest of us are all on soft drinks..

I know what my mother is like when she's drunk. She tells you stuff that you just don't want to know...You can tell she's going to uncover the depths of her dark and seedy past by the way she flounces her hands around as she leans over the table in an inebriated state... She wasn't too bad..seen her worse..But whenever she's like this she always seems to tell me things about her past, about my family's past..

My parents are divorced, I am glad to say. And I live with my Dad, which I am also amazingly glad to say. I am the eldest child (14), my sister is 12. And as I rest my head on my hand, watching my mum's eyes flicker in and out of consciousness, she says :

"Oh, Katie, you were an accident you know.."
"Sorry?"
"When your Dad and I were on the honeymoon...I found out that I was pregnant with you.."
"Er..?"
"Yeah, and I didn't know what to do...see what rushing into children does to marriages....trust me...never have children.."
I look at her in shock...She slurred this to me a while ago...Isn't it wonderful that I know that I was an accident. That I wouldn't even be here if some strange, irregular behaviour by my parents contraception hadn't occurred. Lovely. I was chuffed.

Tonight was full of these fantastic surprises...oh yes. I now know that when I was born..if I was a boy, I would have been called Douglas. (I knew that already, it was just she couldn't remember so told her friends and I again.) Douglas. Guh. Anyway. The delights of the evening continue over a bowl of pasta, she continues to slur out stuff about her Uncle George and how his wife got her nightie stuck in the fire causing her to burn to death.. Fun.
I also found out that when I was around 1 year old, my sister.... a lump....My parents had monetary difficulties which almost drove them to separation. I always knew that my Dad got made redundant when I was around that age...Just didn't know the details...But boy, do I know the details now. How -she- couldn't handle it. How -she- had to go and sit out in the car so that Dad didn't see her upset..and on and on.. Sigh.. I just don't want to know..I really don't...So I shall despair over my mother again..and again..

Slur on oh dear mother of mine.


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Thanks for getting this far. Sorry for the complaining....just had to get it out of my system.. Kiss kiss :-)

Just ignore the fact that you were an 'accident'... or something.

Not sure what to say :)

Sounds like you have the clone of my mother. Only in one aspect you're luckier than me...my parents haven't separated yet so I'm stuck with it 24/7 at the moment.

Aww, Katie darling. Your a good accident, I like you, your a great person. So dont worry. :o)

My nan is a drunk. Simple as that. My mum is the middle child of three, she has an elder brother and a younger sister. While I was at uni this year they went out for a family meal, I think it was my nan's birthday. She said exactly the same thing to my Aunt, the youngest of the three.

Don't get me wrong, I love my nan, she is not a bad person, but I hate her for the way she gets drunk all the time and insults people. I don't go over to visit her very much now. I guess I should really, "you never know what you've got til its gone" and all that.

I try to laugh it off. One year, at Xmas, we went over to her house for dinner. We turned up at about 1. She was drunk already. My mum and aunt had to cook the dinner, then she insulted them throughout the meal. So I started to make fun of her at the table. Really showing her up in front of everyone. Everyone else thought it was really funny, she didn't even notice what I was doing. It sort of deflected everyone's attention from it. But I haven't forgotten it. How it spoilled my mum's Xmas. How it spoiled my aunt's Xmas. How it spoiled my Xmas.

No one is an accident. Everyone is here for a reason. You are here for a reason. Never let anyone tell you otherwise. You are a special person to many, many people. Don't forget that, and live your life by your rules.

The GingerLord wrote:

"No one is an accident. Everyone is here for a reason. You are here for a reason. Never let anyone tell you otherwise. You are a special person to many, many people. Don't forget that, and live your life by your rules."

Couldn't have said that better myself.

Nice post Katie.

Don't worry about being an 'accident' - over half the population were 'accidents', if all our parents had kept their legs crossed when they were supposed to - half of us wouldn't even be here.

Ignore your mum, kt. I know she's trying sometimes, but she's just...yeah...

Not an accident. Never.

Hmm. I am not -that- bothered. It's just the fact that she told me in that way...

Thanks guys :) More kisses. Kiss kiss.