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The world of videogames has changed a hell of a lot over the years. Any kid who's growing up in the world of the Dreamcast, X-Box, Gamecube and PlayStation 2 would probably spit in your face if you were to show the little brat the likes of Space Invaders or Pong.
Characters have come and gone, and new and "interesting" ideas have been incorporated into many different genres of videogames. But what could we, the public, have to endure next?
Read on to find out.
----------
- Sesame StreetFighter -
Capcom's StreetFighter series is pretty dated now, and seeing as it's now the brand spanking 21st Century an' all, surely there's some way that Capcom could inject some originality and new life into the StreetFighter games? Bring on Sesame StreetFighter! Where the likes of Elmo, Mr Hooper, the deaf lady, Ernie, Bert and Big Bird all get together and have a jolly good, 2D pixellated scrap!
- Osama Crisis (+ Lightgun) -
Bored of Point Blank? Tired of Time Crisis? Epileptic from Confidential Mission? Fear not, because a new lightgun game is in town! As a George Bush clone, it's your mission (whether you choose to bloody accept it or not, mate!) to infilatrate Osama Bin Laden's top secret....... cave and blast your way through hoards of........ smelly Afghans in order to prevent Osama from taking over the.......... Middle East.
- Super Mario Bros: The Movie meets Men In Black -
After the tragedy that was the Super Mario Bros movie, Shigeru Miyamoto teams up with J and K in order to wipe the memories of the entire world so that no one can remember how crap the Mario Bros movie was. A 3D third person shoot-em-up adventure where you must wipe out the memories of the general public and avoid the likes of Bob Hoskins, John Leguizamo and Dennis Hopper.
- Luigi's Mansion 2: Mario's Revenge -
Mario's pretty cheesed off! Luigi stealing Mario's thunder during the Gamecube launch was the last straw and now the short, fat plumber is out for revenge! What follows is a dastardly plan whereby Mario plots to switch Luigi's vacuum cleaner to "blow" and smash Luigi's mansion into the ground with a giant wrecking ball. Luigi's Manion 2 plays pretty much the same as the original, except this time instead of hoovering up ghosts you just sit around eating lasange until Mario shows up with his permit to knock down the mansion.
- James Bond 007 and Joanna Dark in "Operation JUMP" -
Baffled by the fact that neither of them posess the ability to jump, MI5 agent James Bond and Carrington Institute agent Joanna Dark team up to foil the diabolical plans of Rareware in an attempt to gain the ability to bend their legs and propel themselves approximately 5 feet into the air.
- Super Mario Bros: Again and Again and Again and Again etc -
Mario and Luigi have just noticed that Super Mario Advance, Super Mario Advance 2 and the upcoming Super Mario Advance 3 are all just exact ports of their old NES and SNES games. This goes completely against their religion, and the Mario Bros are now setting out to create a totally new Mario game. Make way for an "exciting" experience whereby you spend hours trying to type out a storyline without using a keyboard (get the highest score by not making spelling mistakes or using abreviations at all), and sit around removing all the objects from Mario's SNES games, plonking them in "different" locations and attempting to fob off the public with yet another blatant cash-cow of a re-hash.
- Tomb Raider 7 -
After years succeeding to make millions of dollars by simply having large breasts, Lara Croft's pin-width waist has finally snapped under the weight! You must play as that old buttler guy who hangs around Lara's mansion, and stagger your way across 20 identical levels....or get the highest score and most enjoyment by not bothering.
----------
So, is this what we can look forward to during our exciting journey as videogames fans and enthusiasts?
Let's hope not, eh?
Characters have come and gone, and new and "interesting" ideas have been incorporated into many different genres of videogames. But what could we, the public, have to endure next?
Read on to find out.
----------
- Sesame StreetFighter -
Capcom's StreetFighter series is pretty dated now, and seeing as it's now the brand spanking 21st Century an' all, surely there's some way that Capcom could inject some originality and new life into the StreetFighter games? Bring on Sesame StreetFighter! Where the likes of Elmo, Mr Hooper, the deaf lady, Ernie, Bert and Big Bird all get together and have a jolly good, 2D pixellated scrap!
- Osama Crisis (+ Lightgun) -
Bored of Point Blank? Tired of Time Crisis? Epileptic from Confidential Mission? Fear not, because a new lightgun game is in town! As a George Bush clone, it's your mission (whether you choose to bloody accept it or not, mate!) to infilatrate Osama Bin Laden's top secret....... cave and blast your way through hoards of........ smelly Afghans in order to prevent Osama from taking over the.......... Middle East.
- Super Mario Bros: The Movie meets Men In Black -
After the tragedy that was the Super Mario Bros movie, Shigeru Miyamoto teams up with J and K in order to wipe the memories of the entire world so that no one can remember how crap the Mario Bros movie was. A 3D third person shoot-em-up adventure where you must wipe out the memories of the general public and avoid the likes of Bob Hoskins, John Leguizamo and Dennis Hopper.
- Luigi's Mansion 2: Mario's Revenge -
Mario's pretty cheesed off! Luigi stealing Mario's thunder during the Gamecube launch was the last straw and now the short, fat plumber is out for revenge! What follows is a dastardly plan whereby Mario plots to switch Luigi's vacuum cleaner to "blow" and smash Luigi's mansion into the ground with a giant wrecking ball. Luigi's Manion 2 plays pretty much the same as the original, except this time instead of hoovering up ghosts you just sit around eating lasange until Mario shows up with his permit to knock down the mansion.
- James Bond 007 and Joanna Dark in "Operation JUMP" -
Baffled by the fact that neither of them posess the ability to jump, MI5 agent James Bond and Carrington Institute agent Joanna Dark team up to foil the diabolical plans of Rareware in an attempt to gain the ability to bend their legs and propel themselves approximately 5 feet into the air.
- Super Mario Bros: Again and Again and Again and Again etc -
Mario and Luigi have just noticed that Super Mario Advance, Super Mario Advance 2 and the upcoming Super Mario Advance 3 are all just exact ports of their old NES and SNES games. This goes completely against their religion, and the Mario Bros are now setting out to create a totally new Mario game. Make way for an "exciting" experience whereby you spend hours trying to type out a storyline without using a keyboard (get the highest score by not making spelling mistakes or using abreviations at all), and sit around removing all the objects from Mario's SNES games, plonking them in "different" locations and attempting to fob off the public with yet another blatant cash-cow of a re-hash.
- Tomb Raider 7 -
After years succeeding to make millions of dollars by simply having large breasts, Lara Croft's pin-width waist has finally snapped under the weight! You must play as that old buttler guy who hangs around Lara's mansion, and stagger your way across 20 identical levels....or get the highest score and most enjoyment by not bothering.
----------
So, is this what we can look forward to during our exciting journey as videogames fans and enthusiasts?
Let's hope not, eh?
Sesame Street Fighter sounds not too disimilar to Virtua Fighter Kids. They're making a sequal of the game for the GC at the moment to ease people into the VF series for when it finally comes out on the cube :)
Sonic
Sonic
There are other games too which you forgot to mention:
The Simpsons Road Rage 2.
------------------------------
The Simpsons are in another blatent rip-off (like this reply) of Crazy Taxi 2, where all your favourite characters, and Lisa, have to drive around a place called "Big Apple" and take passengers to places like HMV and the bank. Control many vehicles in this time based game, but it's not worth it. It's a dull copy, and isn't even as good as the original Road Rage.
Star Wars: Attack of the Ewoks
----------------------------------
You control Teepo, one of the Ewoks who befriended Chewbacca in Return of the Jedi. Your mission is to protect Teddy-kind any way you can. You are armed with a catapult, a rock and a stick, and have to defeat such vehicles as the Imperial Walkers and Speedbikes, and you have to protect the other Ewoks against Storm Troopers, and the ultimate enemy in the universe....Graham Norton!
Fifa 20002: Universe Championship Cup
------------------------------------------
Once again you get the chance to take on Xygote 3 and Venedictus 4 in the Universe Championship Cup in the latest of Fifa's top selling football games. ISS50 and Virtua Soccer 72 watch out, Fifa 20002: Universe Championship Cup is here to kick your FOOTBALL!
F-Zerd
---------
This game is in no way a complete rip-off of the F-Zero series. In this game, you fly futuristic racers around a course where hitting the walls brings complete chaos. Race many different F-zerd cars at warp speed around many a dangerous track!
Halo 12
----------
Halo was Microsoft's only success in the videogames field, so they developed 11 sequels for it, all ready to hit our shelves all at once, knocking everything off. The games are all the same, nothing different about them at all, but Bill Gates having such a large fanbase these are sure to sell.
The Simpsons Road Rage 2.
------------------------------
The Simpsons are in another blatent rip-off (like this reply) of Crazy Taxi 2, where all your favourite characters, and Lisa, have to drive around a place called "Big Apple" and take passengers to places like HMV and the bank. Control many vehicles in this time based game, but it's not worth it. It's a dull copy, and isn't even as good as the original Road Rage.
Star Wars: Attack of the Ewoks
----------------------------------
You control Teepo, one of the Ewoks who befriended Chewbacca in Return of the Jedi. Your mission is to protect Teddy-kind any way you can. You are armed with a catapult, a rock and a stick, and have to defeat such vehicles as the Imperial Walkers and Speedbikes, and you have to protect the other Ewoks against Storm Troopers, and the ultimate enemy in the universe....Graham Norton!
Fifa 20002: Universe Championship Cup
------------------------------------------
Once again you get the chance to take on Xygote 3 and Venedictus 4 in the Universe Championship Cup in the latest of Fifa's top selling football games. ISS50 and Virtua Soccer 72 watch out, Fifa 20002: Universe Championship Cup is here to kick your FOOTBALL!
F-Zerd
---------
This game is in no way a complete rip-off of the F-Zero series. In this game, you fly futuristic racers around a course where hitting the walls brings complete chaos. Race many different F-zerd cars at warp speed around many a dangerous track!
Halo 12
----------
Halo was Microsoft's only success in the videogames field, so they developed 11 sequels for it, all ready to hit our shelves all at once, knocking everything off. The games are all the same, nothing different about them at all, but Bill Gates having such a large fanbase these are sure to sell.
Insane Bartender wrote:
> Anyway, that's what happens when you don't read properly.
>
> There have always been bad titles, and excessive sequels. But that's
> because original titles don't get as much attention from the average
> gamer. Most gamers won't read through every magazine lookig for the
> most consitently highly reviewed game, they'll just go into a shop,
> look at the covers of a few games, and pick whichever one they know
> most about.
>
> This is probably why so many people bought Metal Gear Solid 2. At
> least, it's the only expplanation I can think of...
*
Don't you mean "excuse" rather than explanation?
> Anyway, that's what happens when you don't read properly.
>
> There have always been bad titles, and excessive sequels. But that's
> because original titles don't get as much attention from the average
> gamer. Most gamers won't read through every magazine lookig for the
> most consitently highly reviewed game, they'll just go into a shop,
> look at the covers of a few games, and pick whichever one they know
> most about.
>
> This is probably why so many people bought Metal Gear Solid 2. At
> least, it's the only expplanation I can think of...
*
Don't you mean "excuse" rather than explanation?
Anyway, that's what happens when you don't read properly.
There have always been bad titles, and excessive sequels. But that's because original titles don't get as much attention from the average gamer. Most gamers won't read through every magazine lookig for the most consitently highly reviewed game, they'll just go into a shop, look at the covers of a few games, and pick whichever one they know most about.
This is probably why so many people bought Metal Gear Solid 2. At least, it's the only expplanation I can think of...
There have always been bad titles, and excessive sequels. But that's because original titles don't get as much attention from the average gamer. Most gamers won't read through every magazine lookig for the most consitently highly reviewed game, they'll just go into a shop, look at the covers of a few games, and pick whichever one they know most about.
This is probably why so many people bought Metal Gear Solid 2. At least, it's the only expplanation I can think of...
Show me the children who have grown up playing the X-Box or GameCube.
Sorry, just picking holes.
Sorry, just picking holes.
Great post Marky, in fact, the first good post I've seen from you :D
If you win for this, you'll deserve it, well done mate.
(I only said those nice things because I have to as a freind, nothing more, nothing less ;)
If you win for this, you'll deserve it, well done mate.
(I only said those nice things because I have to as a freind, nothing more, nothing less ;)
The world of videogames has changed a hell of a lot over the years. Any kid who's growing up in the world of the Dreamcast, X-Box, Gamecube and PlayStation 2 would probably spit in your face if you were to show the little brat the likes of Space Invaders or Pong.
Characters have come and gone, and new and "interesting" ideas have been incorporated into many different genres of videogames. But what could we, the public, have to endure next?
Read on to find out.
----------
- Sesame StreetFighter -
Capcom's StreetFighter series is pretty dated now, and seeing as it's now the brand spanking 21st Century an' all, surely there's some way that Capcom could inject some originality and new life into the StreetFighter games? Bring on Sesame StreetFighter! Where the likes of Elmo, Mr Hooper, the deaf lady, Ernie, Bert and Big Bird all get together and have a jolly good, 2D pixellated scrap!
- Osama Crisis (+ Lightgun) -
Bored of Point Blank? Tired of Time Crisis? Epileptic from Confidential Mission? Fear not, because a new lightgun game is in town! As a George Bush clone, it's your mission (whether you choose to bloody accept it or not, mate!) to infilatrate Osama Bin Laden's top secret....... cave and blast your way through hoards of........ smelly Afghans in order to prevent Osama from taking over the.......... Middle East.
- Super Mario Bros: The Movie meets Men In Black -
After the tragedy that was the Super Mario Bros movie, Shigeru Miyamoto teams up with J and K in order to wipe the memories of the entire world so that no one can remember how crap the Mario Bros movie was. A 3D third person shoot-em-up adventure where you must wipe out the memories of the general public and avoid the likes of Bob Hoskins, John Leguizamo and Dennis Hopper.
- Luigi's Mansion 2: Mario's Revenge -
Mario's pretty cheesed off! Luigi stealing Mario's thunder during the Gamecube launch was the last straw and now the short, fat plumber is out for revenge! What follows is a dastardly plan whereby Mario plots to switch Luigi's vacuum cleaner to "blow" and smash Luigi's mansion into the ground with a giant wrecking ball. Luigi's Manion 2 plays pretty much the same as the original, except this time instead of hoovering up ghosts you just sit around eating lasange until Mario shows up with his permit to knock down the mansion.
- James Bond 007 and Joanna Dark in "Operation JUMP" -
Baffled by the fact that neither of them posess the ability to jump, MI5 agent James Bond and Carrington Institute agent Joanna Dark team up to foil the diabolical plans of Rareware in an attempt to gain the ability to bend their legs and propel themselves approximately 5 feet into the air.
- Super Mario Bros: Again and Again and Again and Again etc -
Mario and Luigi have just noticed that Super Mario Advance, Super Mario Advance 2 and the upcoming Super Mario Advance 3 are all just exact ports of their old NES and SNES games. This goes completely against their religion, and the Mario Bros are now setting out to create a totally new Mario game. Make way for an "exciting" experience whereby you spend hours trying to type out a storyline without using a keyboard (get the highest score by not making spelling mistakes or using abreviations at all), and sit around removing all the objects from Mario's SNES games, plonking them in "different" locations and attempting to fob off the public with yet another blatant cash-cow of a re-hash.
- Tomb Raider 7 -
After years succeeding to make millions of dollars by simply having large breasts, Lara Croft's pin-width waist has finally snapped under the weight! You must play as that old buttler guy who hangs around Lara's mansion, and stagger your way across 20 identical levels....or get the highest score and most enjoyment by not bothering.
----------
So, is this what we can look forward to during our exciting journey as videogames fans and enthusiasts?
Let's hope not, eh?
Characters have come and gone, and new and "interesting" ideas have been incorporated into many different genres of videogames. But what could we, the public, have to endure next?
Read on to find out.
----------
- Sesame StreetFighter -
Capcom's StreetFighter series is pretty dated now, and seeing as it's now the brand spanking 21st Century an' all, surely there's some way that Capcom could inject some originality and new life into the StreetFighter games? Bring on Sesame StreetFighter! Where the likes of Elmo, Mr Hooper, the deaf lady, Ernie, Bert and Big Bird all get together and have a jolly good, 2D pixellated scrap!
- Osama Crisis (+ Lightgun) -
Bored of Point Blank? Tired of Time Crisis? Epileptic from Confidential Mission? Fear not, because a new lightgun game is in town! As a George Bush clone, it's your mission (whether you choose to bloody accept it or not, mate!) to infilatrate Osama Bin Laden's top secret....... cave and blast your way through hoards of........ smelly Afghans in order to prevent Osama from taking over the.......... Middle East.
- Super Mario Bros: The Movie meets Men In Black -
After the tragedy that was the Super Mario Bros movie, Shigeru Miyamoto teams up with J and K in order to wipe the memories of the entire world so that no one can remember how crap the Mario Bros movie was. A 3D third person shoot-em-up adventure where you must wipe out the memories of the general public and avoid the likes of Bob Hoskins, John Leguizamo and Dennis Hopper.
- Luigi's Mansion 2: Mario's Revenge -
Mario's pretty cheesed off! Luigi stealing Mario's thunder during the Gamecube launch was the last straw and now the short, fat plumber is out for revenge! What follows is a dastardly plan whereby Mario plots to switch Luigi's vacuum cleaner to "blow" and smash Luigi's mansion into the ground with a giant wrecking ball. Luigi's Manion 2 plays pretty much the same as the original, except this time instead of hoovering up ghosts you just sit around eating lasange until Mario shows up with his permit to knock down the mansion.
- James Bond 007 and Joanna Dark in "Operation JUMP" -
Baffled by the fact that neither of them posess the ability to jump, MI5 agent James Bond and Carrington Institute agent Joanna Dark team up to foil the diabolical plans of Rareware in an attempt to gain the ability to bend their legs and propel themselves approximately 5 feet into the air.
- Super Mario Bros: Again and Again and Again and Again etc -
Mario and Luigi have just noticed that Super Mario Advance, Super Mario Advance 2 and the upcoming Super Mario Advance 3 are all just exact ports of their old NES and SNES games. This goes completely against their religion, and the Mario Bros are now setting out to create a totally new Mario game. Make way for an "exciting" experience whereby you spend hours trying to type out a storyline without using a keyboard (get the highest score by not making spelling mistakes or using abreviations at all), and sit around removing all the objects from Mario's SNES games, plonking them in "different" locations and attempting to fob off the public with yet another blatant cash-cow of a re-hash.
- Tomb Raider 7 -
After years succeeding to make millions of dollars by simply having large breasts, Lara Croft's pin-width waist has finally snapped under the weight! You must play as that old buttler guy who hangs around Lara's mansion, and stagger your way across 20 identical levels....or get the highest score and most enjoyment by not bothering.
----------
So, is this what we can look forward to during our exciting journey as videogames fans and enthusiasts?
Let's hope not, eh?