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*Stryke is sat at his PC, typing*
*The door is smashed open and men in black suits run in and seize him*
Man - Stryke, you are wanted on 300 counts of spamming
Stryke - And just who are you?
Man - We're from the S.A.S
Stryke - S.A.S???
Man - Staff Against Spamming
Stryke - Oh... well then you can afford to buy me a new door
Man - The only doors you'll be seeing for the next 10 years will be ones with bars!
Stryke - But I hate spammers, I never spam! Look at my word count!
Man - I'm sorry, but we've traced the spamming to your street. We know it's either you, or your neighbour, big_slow. We think it's you, so you're coming with us!
Stryke - Nooooo!
*Stryke in prison, writing to his parents*
Stryke - It's hard here, in this newly built prison for spammers... I keep trying to tell them I'm innocent but the guard just puts his CD player on... And he listens to Limp
Bizkit... LIMP BIZKIT! I can't take another minute of this dank, urine stenched, hell hole. Those pink coconut things you send me have made me really popular, even if everyone here IS newbie scum. I've met this guy Shaneo, we used to hate each other, but he's not so bad.
It's been three years now, and I'm getting out on good behaviour. Get my PC out of the attic - I'm coming home!
*SR Towers*
Loki - OK, we're flying some of the most feared spammers and newbies in England to our brand new maximum security prison in Scotland. We have some of the most dangerous spammers in the world here today, and I don't want anything going wrong
Mr Snuggly - Who do we have?
*They stare at a monitor that shows people getting off a bus and being loaded onto the plane*
Loki - There we have Shaneo, multiple offender, but he's promised to be good so we're letting him go. There we have Hercules, ooh, and there's FOOTBALL GOD. And there's MetalGear2King. Aha, we have a special guest here today, big_slow
Mr Snuggly - Really?
*A cage is brought out of the bus, someone can be seen pacing around inside, laidened with chains*
Darkus - All those monsters on one plane...
*Stryke comes out and covers his eyes from the blinding sun*
Mr Snuggly - Who's that?
Loki - That is... Stryke, someone we locked up by accident... he's a nobody
Mr Snuggly - OK, Hybrid, are you ready?
Hybrid Valves - Yep
Loki - OK, we've got you a seat right next to Shaneo, we need you to find out where he hid the remote for the TV as soon as possible, his parents are paying us a lot of money
Hyrbrid Valves - Got it
*On the plane*
Guard - You're not picking your lock there are you, big_slow?
big_slow - Who me? Na, I'm just sharpening this paper clip in the lock
Guard - Oh, OK
*big_slow breaks out and grabs the guard*
*Hybrid Valves jumps up, pointing a water pistol at big_slow*
big_slow - Um, shouldn't you have a real gun?
Hybrid Valves - Hey, this is Britain, where would I get a real gun from? Especially on the pay I get at SR!
big_slow - Fair enough... Right! Drop it or I give this guard a Chinese burn!
Guard - Noooo! Do as he says! I'm too young to get sore skin
Hybrid Valves - I can't do that!
*Hercules comes up behind Hybrid Valves and grabs the gun*
Hybrid Valves - Oops
*big_slow takes the gun and squirts Hybrid Valves*
Hybrid Valves - Argh! That's cold!
big_slow - Really?
Hybrid Valves - Yeah, I put it in the fridge before I got onboard
big_slow - Good thinking... now, put those handcuffs on.
*He goes to the front of the plane*
big_slow - Ladies and... Oh, wait... Scratch that. Gentlemen, welcome to Spammer Air
*Stryke drops his head*
Stryke - Had to happen to me, didn't it?
big_slow - OK, we'll be landing in Manchester to refuel and pick up KR so we can get on his jet in Newcastle and head for Disney Land
*Everyone cheers, except Stryke and Shaneo*
Shaneo - Sorry, I tuned out, what's happening?
*SR Towers*
Loki - What happened???
Darkus - Nothing to worry about, the pilot just reported in, he says there was some turbulence, a hijacking of the plane by the spammers and the in-flight film was awful
Loki - Oh, that's alright then...
*Long pause*
Loki - Hijacking??!?!?
*Back in the plane*
big_slow - OK, some of you need to get off in Manchester, who's it gonna be?
Shaneo - Us two, right here
big_slow - OK... Wait, sorry Shaneo, they're not expecting any regulars, that puts you poop out of luck
Stryke - Don't worry, Shaneo, I'll tell everyone what's going on, this plane won't leave the airfield
big_slow - Oh, and in case any of you want to squeal to save your friend, we're gonna tape your mouths shut
Stryke - Oh no, it'll rip my goatee when they pull it off! Um, big_slow, I've changed my mind, I could never live with myself if I gave myself in
big_slow - OK, um, we'll use the guard. Hmm, Stryke, you're the most un-trustworthy of the spammers here, being that you hate us all, you go down with FOOTBALL GOD and sort out the landing gear
*FOOTBALL GOD and Stryke go down. There's a lot of commotion, some screaming, some punches and kicks, and some swearing. Finally Stryke emerges straightening his shirt*
*Down below, over the A19*
Mr Snuggly - Ah, feels good to get away from those spam riddled forums
*A body lands on his car*
Mr Snuggly - Had to happen to me, didn't it?
*Back at SR towers*
Loki - A body? With my name on it? Saying they're going to Newcastle?
Mr Snuggly - Yeah, what you repeated is correct
Loki - Hmm, let's go
Mr Snuggly - Are you joking? It's my holiday!
Loki - OK, well, I'll steal your car and drive to Newcastle
Mr Snuggly - Fine by me, a bird pooped on it before. Just take it into the carwash on your way back
*Back in the plane*
big_slow - Wow, we only just got away from Manchester with our lives! OK, pilot, take us to Newcastle!
TimmyM - You got it!
*Further back in the plane, Stryke and Shaneo are sat. Shaneo starts groaning*
Stryke - What's wrong with you?
Shaneo - I'm diabetic
Stryke - What?? You never said!
Shaneo - Really? I thought I'd mentioned it...
Stryke - But what about all those pink coconut things I gave you?
Shaneo - Oh, well, it only kicks in every so often... You got any of them by the way? I'm starving!
Stryke - I'm surrounded by idiots!
*On the roads, Loki is driving to Newcastle*
Loki - (on his phone) Yeah, police, army, everything you got! I need them at Newcastle airport! No, the miners aren't striking - a plane full of spammers has been hijacked! (pause) Spammers! Yes, spammers! They, you know... they spam! Oh, never mind, I'll deal with it myself!
*He hangs up*
*Back on the plane, they've just landed at Newcastle airport*
big_slow - TimmyM, go up that tower, see if anyone's coming. KR?
KR - Yeah?
big_slow - Where's that plane. You said it'd be here
KR - I don't know, have patience
big_slow - The last kid who said that to me, I sent him a virus. Don't mess with me!
KR - It'll be here, I swear!
*Stryke comes out*
Stryke - Don't worry, Shaneo, I'll get you a needle
Shaneo - And a coke!
*Stryke walks up to big_slow*
Stryke - What's the plan?
big_slow - We get on KR's plane, he has Sony forum users bringing one over
Stryke - You trust KR?
big_slow - Um...
Stryke - Because I heard he spammed an entire forum with his own cousin on once...
big_slow - Your point being?
Stryke - Why would he care about killing some hired guns once we'd broken him out of prison?
big_slow - Hmm, you're right... Hercules! We're going to plan B
Hercules - Plan B?
big_slow - Oh, yeah, sorry, we don't have a plan B do we? Hmm
Stryke - We could always dig out this plane, refuel it and go to Disney Land ourselves
big_slow - You heard my plan, Hercules, do it!
Hercules - Yes, sir! Hey, you, get those guards, we're gonna pull out the plane
Stryke - I'll get the fuel truck
*Meanwhile, Loki is creeping around the airport. He wanders into a hangar, full of Sony forum users. He hides, just as Stryke walks in*
Pro Evo - Who are you?
Stryke - So this is KR's plane, eh? How come you're not letting us all on?
ssxpro - Well, duh! We're gonna rescue KR and leave you lot here!
Stryke - I should've known! Oh, wait, I did know
*Pro Evo pulls a gun on Stryke. Stryke grabs it and they wrestle around on the floor, the Sony forum users start chanting "Fight! Fight! Fight!" Stryke gets the better of him and stands up with the gun*
Stryke - Ha ha! Now I have the gun!
*He smiles smugly*
ssxpro - Oh... wait, we all have guns too!
*They all pull guns on Stryke*
Stryke - (waving his hand) You will put those guns down
*They all aim at Stryke*
Stryke - Well, it was worth a try
*Loki jumps out from his hiding place*
Loki - Freeze!
*A big gunfight breaks out. Stryke keeps saying witty one liners every time he blows a spammer away*
*After the dust has settled, Stryke and Loki are left*
Loki - You're Stryke, right?
Stryke - That's right
Loki - I got your message
Stryke - Where are the troops?
Loki - Hey, I'm on an SR staff member, I don't have THAT many connections
Stryke - Great (!)
Loki - What are you gonna do?
Stryke - What do you think I'm gonna do? I'm gonna get the hell outta here!
Loki - Um, I'll pay you if you save the day
Stryke - What do you think I'm gonna do? I'm gonna save the funning day
*Back with the plane*
Hercules - We're almost ready, big_slow
big_slow - Excellent
*Stryke comes running up*
Stryke - I fuelled the plane, we're good to go
*KR stops helping to pull the plane out of the ditch and starts running off*
big_slow - Where the heck is he going?
*In the hangar, KR rushes in, sees all his dead comrades, and runs onto the plane*
KR - Go, go, go!
*The jet's engines start up. Loki ties a big rope around the tail*
Loki - Ha ha, that'll learn 'em!
*The jet shoots out of the hangar, all the spammers see it*
big_slow - That's my funning plane!
*The rope suddenly snaps the plane back, and it crashes into the fuel truck. The spammers run up to KR who is dragging himself out of the wreck*
KR - Hi, um... big_slow.... I was.... coming to get you, yeah, that's it!
*big_slow stares at him*
KR - Big....
big_slow - ...Up yourself
*He throws a match at KR. Nothing happens*
big_slow - Oh, yeah, right. My bad.... forgot to light it
*He does so and throws another match at KR. He explodes into a fireball*
big_slow - Anyone for grilled spammer?
*They get aboard the plane*
big_slow - Let's go, let's go, I'm bored
Hercules - Yes, sir!
*They take off, just as Mr Snuggly shows up*
Mr Snuggly - What happened? Where'd they go?
Loki - They got away
Mr Snuggly - Where's my car?
Loki - I parked it over there
*They look towards the car as the plane becomes but a spec on the horizon*
*The car's windows have been smashed and "Alan Shearer is God" has been spray painted on the doors*
Loki - Well, that's Geordies for you...
Mr Snuggly - I'll kill you!
*Tony runs up*
Tony - Look, I got us some big army surplus choppers, we can kill those spamming scumbags!
Loki - But Stryke is up there!
Tony - Is he an SR member?
Loki - Well, no, but-
Tony - Kill that cheap-skate scumbag!
*They run to the choppers*
*Back on the plane, Stryke is giving Shaneo some insulin*
Shaneo - Woah, I'm like, totally trippin'
*big_slow comes to the front of the plane*
big_slow - Fellow spammers, we have a traitor among us
*Shaneo gets up, barely able to stand*
Shaneo - Whatever it was, it was me!
Stryke - Don't listen to him, the insulin's got him crazy! It was me! I was the one who warned Loki about us being at Newcastle
big_slow - Wow... I was just trying to find out who nicked my custard creams.... But, well, you admitted to something worse, so I may as well just shoot you
*He raises his gun, just as an attack chopper appears behind them, and begins shooting*
big_slow - What the fun?
*Everyone dives for cover*
Hercules - big_slow!
big_slow - What is it? I'm kind of busy getting shot at right now!
Hercules - They've hit our fuel tank, we're going down!
big_slow - Why can't things ever go right? We got any parachutes?
Hercules - You sold them at Newcastle for a bottle of Brown Ale!
big_slow - Curses!
*The plane crashes in Carlisle. Among the wreckage, big_slow drags himself out, followed by Hercules and TimmyM. Loki, Snuggly and Tony run in*
Mr Snuggly - Ha, we got you good, didn't we?
Tony - Where's big_slow?
*Stryke limps out. Tony pulls a gun*
Tony - Freeze, spammer!
Loki - That's Stryke!
Tony - Freeze, cheap-skate!
Loki - Oh, for heaven's sake
Stryke - Hey, there goes big_slow, on that fire engine!
Loki - Let's go!
*They both jump on the nearest transport - some skateboards*
Hercules - They're gaining on us!
big_slow - I'll fix them!
*He fires the water cannon at them*
Stryke - You got a gun?
Loki - No, the missus took it shopping
Stryke - Great (!)
*He jumps onto the fire engine and starts punching big_slow in the face*
big_slow - Stop hitting me! It bloomin' hurts!
*Loki opens the passenger door*
Loki - You pull over!
Hercules - Not unless you give me some more GADs!
Loki - Never!
*Loki drags Hercules out, and grabs the wheel of the fire engine. Meanwhile, Stryke is still beating up big_slow as the vehicle stops*
Loki - Um, you can stop pummelling him now.... I don't think he's getting back up
Stryke - ...and this is for the Sony forum, and this is for putting your word count up, and this is for quoting entire posts, and this is for...
*Mr Snuggly and Tony run up*
Mr Snuggly - Well, we did it
Loki - We???
Mr Snuggly - OK, *I* did it
*Loki cracks Snuggly in the jaw*
Stryke - I'm just glad it's all over. Now I can get home and start newbie bashing again.
Everyone - Hurrah!
The End
*The door is smashed open and men in black suits run in and seize him*
Man - Stryke, you are wanted on 300 counts of spamming
Stryke - And just who are you?
Man - We're from the S.A.S
Stryke - S.A.S???
Man - Staff Against Spamming
Stryke - Oh... well then you can afford to buy me a new door
Man - The only doors you'll be seeing for the next 10 years will be ones with bars!
Stryke - But I hate spammers, I never spam! Look at my word count!
Man - I'm sorry, but we've traced the spamming to your street. We know it's either you, or your neighbour, big_slow. We think it's you, so you're coming with us!
Stryke - Nooooo!
*Stryke in prison, writing to his parents*
Stryke - It's hard here, in this newly built prison for spammers... I keep trying to tell them I'm innocent but the guard just puts his CD player on... And he listens to Limp
Bizkit... LIMP BIZKIT! I can't take another minute of this dank, urine stenched, hell hole. Those pink coconut things you send me have made me really popular, even if everyone here IS newbie scum. I've met this guy Shaneo, we used to hate each other, but he's not so bad.
It's been three years now, and I'm getting out on good behaviour. Get my PC out of the attic - I'm coming home!
*SR Towers*
Loki - OK, we're flying some of the most feared spammers and newbies in England to our brand new maximum security prison in Scotland. We have some of the most dangerous spammers in the world here today, and I don't want anything going wrong
Mr Snuggly - Who do we have?
*They stare at a monitor that shows people getting off a bus and being loaded onto the plane*
Loki - There we have Shaneo, multiple offender, but he's promised to be good so we're letting him go. There we have Hercules, ooh, and there's FOOTBALL GOD. And there's MetalGear2King. Aha, we have a special guest here today, big_slow
Mr Snuggly - Really?
*A cage is brought out of the bus, someone can be seen pacing around inside, laidened with chains*
Darkus - All those monsters on one plane...
*Stryke comes out and covers his eyes from the blinding sun*
Mr Snuggly - Who's that?
Loki - That is... Stryke, someone we locked up by accident... he's a nobody
Mr Snuggly - OK, Hybrid, are you ready?
Hybrid Valves - Yep
Loki - OK, we've got you a seat right next to Shaneo, we need you to find out where he hid the remote for the TV as soon as possible, his parents are paying us a lot of money
Hyrbrid Valves - Got it
*On the plane*
Guard - You're not picking your lock there are you, big_slow?
big_slow - Who me? Na, I'm just sharpening this paper clip in the lock
Guard - Oh, OK
*big_slow breaks out and grabs the guard*
*Hybrid Valves jumps up, pointing a water pistol at big_slow*
big_slow - Um, shouldn't you have a real gun?
Hybrid Valves - Hey, this is Britain, where would I get a real gun from? Especially on the pay I get at SR!
big_slow - Fair enough... Right! Drop it or I give this guard a Chinese burn!
Guard - Noooo! Do as he says! I'm too young to get sore skin
Hybrid Valves - I can't do that!
*Hercules comes up behind Hybrid Valves and grabs the gun*
Hybrid Valves - Oops
*big_slow takes the gun and squirts Hybrid Valves*
Hybrid Valves - Argh! That's cold!
big_slow - Really?
Hybrid Valves - Yeah, I put it in the fridge before I got onboard
big_slow - Good thinking... now, put those handcuffs on.
*He goes to the front of the plane*
big_slow - Ladies and... Oh, wait... Scratch that. Gentlemen, welcome to Spammer Air
*Stryke drops his head*
Stryke - Had to happen to me, didn't it?
big_slow - OK, we'll be landing in Manchester to refuel and pick up KR so we can get on his jet in Newcastle and head for Disney Land
*Everyone cheers, except Stryke and Shaneo*
Shaneo - Sorry, I tuned out, what's happening?
*SR Towers*
Loki - What happened???
Darkus - Nothing to worry about, the pilot just reported in, he says there was some turbulence, a hijacking of the plane by the spammers and the in-flight film was awful
Loki - Oh, that's alright then...
*Long pause*
Loki - Hijacking??!?!?
*Back in the plane*
big_slow - OK, some of you need to get off in Manchester, who's it gonna be?
Shaneo - Us two, right here
big_slow - OK... Wait, sorry Shaneo, they're not expecting any regulars, that puts you poop out of luck
Stryke - Don't worry, Shaneo, I'll tell everyone what's going on, this plane won't leave the airfield
big_slow - Oh, and in case any of you want to squeal to save your friend, we're gonna tape your mouths shut
Stryke - Oh no, it'll rip my goatee when they pull it off! Um, big_slow, I've changed my mind, I could never live with myself if I gave myself in
big_slow - OK, um, we'll use the guard. Hmm, Stryke, you're the most un-trustworthy of the spammers here, being that you hate us all, you go down with FOOTBALL GOD and sort out the landing gear
*FOOTBALL GOD and Stryke go down. There's a lot of commotion, some screaming, some punches and kicks, and some swearing. Finally Stryke emerges straightening his shirt*
*Down below, over the A19*
Mr Snuggly - Ah, feels good to get away from those spam riddled forums
*A body lands on his car*
Mr Snuggly - Had to happen to me, didn't it?
*Back at SR towers*
Loki - A body? With my name on it? Saying they're going to Newcastle?
Mr Snuggly - Yeah, what you repeated is correct
Loki - Hmm, let's go
Mr Snuggly - Are you joking? It's my holiday!
Loki - OK, well, I'll steal your car and drive to Newcastle
Mr Snuggly - Fine by me, a bird pooped on it before. Just take it into the carwash on your way back
*Back in the plane*
big_slow - Wow, we only just got away from Manchester with our lives! OK, pilot, take us to Newcastle!
TimmyM - You got it!
*Further back in the plane, Stryke and Shaneo are sat. Shaneo starts groaning*
Stryke - What's wrong with you?
Shaneo - I'm diabetic
Stryke - What?? You never said!
Shaneo - Really? I thought I'd mentioned it...
Stryke - But what about all those pink coconut things I gave you?
Shaneo - Oh, well, it only kicks in every so often... You got any of them by the way? I'm starving!
Stryke - I'm surrounded by idiots!
*On the roads, Loki is driving to Newcastle*
Loki - (on his phone) Yeah, police, army, everything you got! I need them at Newcastle airport! No, the miners aren't striking - a plane full of spammers has been hijacked! (pause) Spammers! Yes, spammers! They, you know... they spam! Oh, never mind, I'll deal with it myself!
*He hangs up*
*Back on the plane, they've just landed at Newcastle airport*
big_slow - TimmyM, go up that tower, see if anyone's coming. KR?
KR - Yeah?
big_slow - Where's that plane. You said it'd be here
KR - I don't know, have patience
big_slow - The last kid who said that to me, I sent him a virus. Don't mess with me!
KR - It'll be here, I swear!
*Stryke comes out*
Stryke - Don't worry, Shaneo, I'll get you a needle
Shaneo - And a coke!
*Stryke walks up to big_slow*
Stryke - What's the plan?
big_slow - We get on KR's plane, he has Sony forum users bringing one over
Stryke - You trust KR?
big_slow - Um...
Stryke - Because I heard he spammed an entire forum with his own cousin on once...
big_slow - Your point being?
Stryke - Why would he care about killing some hired guns once we'd broken him out of prison?
big_slow - Hmm, you're right... Hercules! We're going to plan B
Hercules - Plan B?
big_slow - Oh, yeah, sorry, we don't have a plan B do we? Hmm
Stryke - We could always dig out this plane, refuel it and go to Disney Land ourselves
big_slow - You heard my plan, Hercules, do it!
Hercules - Yes, sir! Hey, you, get those guards, we're gonna pull out the plane
Stryke - I'll get the fuel truck
*Meanwhile, Loki is creeping around the airport. He wanders into a hangar, full of Sony forum users. He hides, just as Stryke walks in*
Pro Evo - Who are you?
Stryke - So this is KR's plane, eh? How come you're not letting us all on?
ssxpro - Well, duh! We're gonna rescue KR and leave you lot here!
Stryke - I should've known! Oh, wait, I did know
*Pro Evo pulls a gun on Stryke. Stryke grabs it and they wrestle around on the floor, the Sony forum users start chanting "Fight! Fight! Fight!" Stryke gets the better of him and stands up with the gun*
Stryke - Ha ha! Now I have the gun!
*He smiles smugly*
ssxpro - Oh... wait, we all have guns too!
*They all pull guns on Stryke*
Stryke - (waving his hand) You will put those guns down
*They all aim at Stryke*
Stryke - Well, it was worth a try
*Loki jumps out from his hiding place*
Loki - Freeze!
*A big gunfight breaks out. Stryke keeps saying witty one liners every time he blows a spammer away*
*After the dust has settled, Stryke and Loki are left*
Loki - You're Stryke, right?
Stryke - That's right
Loki - I got your message
Stryke - Where are the troops?
Loki - Hey, I'm on an SR staff member, I don't have THAT many connections
Stryke - Great (!)
Loki - What are you gonna do?
Stryke - What do you think I'm gonna do? I'm gonna get the hell outta here!
Loki - Um, I'll pay you if you save the day
Stryke - What do you think I'm gonna do? I'm gonna save the funning day
*Back with the plane*
Hercules - We're almost ready, big_slow
big_slow - Excellent
*Stryke comes running up*
Stryke - I fuelled the plane, we're good to go
*KR stops helping to pull the plane out of the ditch and starts running off*
big_slow - Where the heck is he going?
*In the hangar, KR rushes in, sees all his dead comrades, and runs onto the plane*
KR - Go, go, go!
*The jet's engines start up. Loki ties a big rope around the tail*
Loki - Ha ha, that'll learn 'em!
*The jet shoots out of the hangar, all the spammers see it*
big_slow - That's my funning plane!
*The rope suddenly snaps the plane back, and it crashes into the fuel truck. The spammers run up to KR who is dragging himself out of the wreck*
KR - Hi, um... big_slow.... I was.... coming to get you, yeah, that's it!
*big_slow stares at him*
KR - Big....
big_slow - ...Up yourself
*He throws a match at KR. Nothing happens*
big_slow - Oh, yeah, right. My bad.... forgot to light it
*He does so and throws another match at KR. He explodes into a fireball*
big_slow - Anyone for grilled spammer?
*They get aboard the plane*
big_slow - Let's go, let's go, I'm bored
Hercules - Yes, sir!
*They take off, just as Mr Snuggly shows up*
Mr Snuggly - What happened? Where'd they go?
Loki - They got away
Mr Snuggly - Where's my car?
Loki - I parked it over there
*They look towards the car as the plane becomes but a spec on the horizon*
*The car's windows have been smashed and "Alan Shearer is God" has been spray painted on the doors*
Loki - Well, that's Geordies for you...
Mr Snuggly - I'll kill you!
*Tony runs up*
Tony - Look, I got us some big army surplus choppers, we can kill those spamming scumbags!
Loki - But Stryke is up there!
Tony - Is he an SR member?
Loki - Well, no, but-
Tony - Kill that cheap-skate scumbag!
*They run to the choppers*
*Back on the plane, Stryke is giving Shaneo some insulin*
Shaneo - Woah, I'm like, totally trippin'
*big_slow comes to the front of the plane*
big_slow - Fellow spammers, we have a traitor among us
*Shaneo gets up, barely able to stand*
Shaneo - Whatever it was, it was me!
Stryke - Don't listen to him, the insulin's got him crazy! It was me! I was the one who warned Loki about us being at Newcastle
big_slow - Wow... I was just trying to find out who nicked my custard creams.... But, well, you admitted to something worse, so I may as well just shoot you
*He raises his gun, just as an attack chopper appears behind them, and begins shooting*
big_slow - What the fun?
*Everyone dives for cover*
Hercules - big_slow!
big_slow - What is it? I'm kind of busy getting shot at right now!
Hercules - They've hit our fuel tank, we're going down!
big_slow - Why can't things ever go right? We got any parachutes?
Hercules - You sold them at Newcastle for a bottle of Brown Ale!
big_slow - Curses!
*The plane crashes in Carlisle. Among the wreckage, big_slow drags himself out, followed by Hercules and TimmyM. Loki, Snuggly and Tony run in*
Mr Snuggly - Ha, we got you good, didn't we?
Tony - Where's big_slow?
*Stryke limps out. Tony pulls a gun*
Tony - Freeze, spammer!
Loki - That's Stryke!
Tony - Freeze, cheap-skate!
Loki - Oh, for heaven's sake
Stryke - Hey, there goes big_slow, on that fire engine!
Loki - Let's go!
*They both jump on the nearest transport - some skateboards*
Hercules - They're gaining on us!
big_slow - I'll fix them!
*He fires the water cannon at them*
Stryke - You got a gun?
Loki - No, the missus took it shopping
Stryke - Great (!)
*He jumps onto the fire engine and starts punching big_slow in the face*
big_slow - Stop hitting me! It bloomin' hurts!
*Loki opens the passenger door*
Loki - You pull over!
Hercules - Not unless you give me some more GADs!
Loki - Never!
*Loki drags Hercules out, and grabs the wheel of the fire engine. Meanwhile, Stryke is still beating up big_slow as the vehicle stops*
Loki - Um, you can stop pummelling him now.... I don't think he's getting back up
Stryke - ...and this is for the Sony forum, and this is for putting your word count up, and this is for quoting entire posts, and this is for...
*Mr Snuggly and Tony run up*
Mr Snuggly - Well, we did it
Loki - We???
Mr Snuggly - OK, *I* did it
*Loki cracks Snuggly in the jaw*
Stryke - I'm just glad it's all over. Now I can get home and start newbie bashing again.
Everyone - Hurrah!
The End
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Yeah, classic, eh, KR?
Mojo wrote:
KR - Big....
big_slow - ...Up yourself
LOL!!!
KR - Big....
big_slow - ...Up yourself
LOL!!!
good post but it is not the best one ive read
Not the best one, but still good.
Indeed, Stryke... indeed
It's my creative influence over them. Aye.
Cheers, all
Appreciate the response
Appreciate the response
heheheh
And now I can say that it was an excellent spoof.
If you dont win GAD for one of these soon im going to march down to those (taking a page out of Mojo's book) "southern fairies" and im going to kick each one of their butt's and MAKE them give you one.
But I probably wont though.....
hhhmmmmm
*runs*
-------
Great stuff Mojo, you now know why I vote for you, other than being one of the first people to have a laugh with me its your brilliant spoofs that just put you at the top of the my list.
Well done.
Hope you win.
:)
And now I can say that it was an excellent spoof.
If you dont win GAD for one of these soon im going to march down to those (taking a page out of Mojo's book) "southern fairies" and im going to kick each one of their butt's and MAKE them give you one.
But I probably wont though.....
hhhmmmmm
*runs*
-------
Great stuff Mojo, you now know why I vote for you, other than being one of the first people to have a laugh with me its your brilliant spoofs that just put you at the top of the my list.
Well done.
Hope you win.
:)
That ruled!
Keep them coming.
Keep them coming.
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