The "General Games Chat" forum, which includes Retro Game Reviews, has been archived and is now read-only. You cannot post here or create a new thread or review on this forum.
...Sega was still in business and Nintendo was bust?
Imagine it. 2001. Nintendo have just announced the failure of their N64, and that they'll stop manufacturing consoles once and for all. A few days later, they announce PlayStation 2 versions of Dr. Mario, Mario Party 3 and Bomberman. Within weeks, all the Nintendo hating PS2-lubbers love Nintendo for 'gracing' the PlayStation 2 with versions of their 'best' (worst) games. Bomberman for the PS2 is a complete success, receiving a high 96% in PSM2 with quotes:
"The graphics have been slightly improved from the N64 version, but even so it pushes the PS2 to its limits"
"This is one of the best games we've ever seen on the PS2"
Being a straight conversion of Bomberman 64, it was widely praised by the PS2 masses, despite many Ninties saying that it was in the worst ten N64 games.
Also announced was the widely acclaimed 'Super Mario X'. Apparently Nintendo really are giving their award winning mascot a facelift, because in this new incarnation he'll be growing machine guns and a big beefy bazooka to satisfy the trigger happy Xbox fans. Chief programmer Shigeru Miyamoto had this to say:
"Mario on the Xbox is going to be completely different. To fit into the Xbox mould, we're going to make this a deathmatch/mission based multiplayer shoot 'em up with rocket launchers and flamethrowers. Mario can also get a big jetpack and the AI will be great."
The unbiased gaming industry received this news with many an 'err', but Super Mario X was still claimed to be one of the best games ever.
What's more, Zelda: Majora's mask, links second outing on the N64 was ported terribly for the Dreamcast, and received in such a manner as well. Highly hyped, it suffered from aweful music, terrible clipping and general 'bad conversion' syndrome. Ninty fans praised, DCs looked on frowning. We can only hope that Nintendo have a future as a producer of games only...
...Microsoft HAD bought out Nintendo back in 2001?
Nintendo has undergone a huge facelift this year. Its Japan based headquarters were airlifted to Bill Gates' estate in California, Shigeru Miyamoto was fired as chief designer and The Rock was employed to survey game development. Mario was turned into a WWF wrestler and had a gun surgically grafted to his arm. The much coveted 'Nintendo Dolphin' was released in September under the new name, Microsoft N-Cube. Bill Gates replaced Hiroshi Yamauchi as company president, much to the delight of many former Nintendo fans, but the new look for Nintendo totally undermined the wide spread partying.
Following Microsoft's success after buying out Nintendo, Apple then bought out Sega in a furious attempt to foil Bill Gates in the console wars. After huge marketing campaigns, false statements and a very embarrasing incident at E3 in which Bill Gates sent a Syzygy virus to the Apple side of the showroom, shutting down all of the AppleCast consoles; The console war is literally turning into just that. American swat teams, funded by Bill Gates, are scouring the mountains and canyon(s) of Arizona hoping to force out the last remnants of the once glorius Apple company. Meanwhile, Sony was doing quite nicely building up massive profits in Japan since the two other American based companies merely 'forgot' it was there.
...Grand Theft Auto 3 forgot to get rated.
DMA design and Rockstar were put out of business today after millions of lawsuits against forced the biggest courtroom payout ever. Rockstar was forced to pay the massive amount of $10,000,000,000,000,000,090 after literally thousands of parents had to take their children to rehabilitation centers after being paralyzed by the awefully adult content.
One mother had this to say:
"Johnny died after seeing this sickening game. He only played it for thirteen hours a day, eight days a week, and it is entirely the fault of the bad people who played Grand Theft Auto 3. Despite the fact he died two years before the game was released, I'm sure it contributed to his death by its evil gratuitous nature."
Although this was the only case related to GTA3 which was thrown out of court, it was a milestone in gaming achievements:
"The gaming industry has had to pay out countless times for totally unrelated incidents. I remember last year when a little boy blew up his head in a microwave because he'd been playing Mario Kart. The developers tried to convince the judge that Mario's hands were too chunky to use a microwave, but he still ordered Nintendo to get the microwave cleaned. This recent case is the first time a judge hasn't blamed videogames for the way the world is."
And in response to September the 11th, relatives of the victims have brought massive charges against Microsoft, because apparently Osama Bin Laden plays video games. Despite probably only owning a 486 at the most, he played Microsoft Flight Simulator which spurred on his plans. This is totally ridiculous, but because of the way of the world and the totally anti-gaming attitude the world takes on, gaming is to blame for everything. Also global warming.
I just wanted to write down a few ideas, because it is scary to think what would have happened instead of what did. Imagine if the allies LOST WW2... We could all be playing Zooper Fritzio vier und sechzig...
Imagine it. 2001. Nintendo have just announced the failure of their N64, and that they'll stop manufacturing consoles once and for all. A few days later, they announce PlayStation 2 versions of Dr. Mario, Mario Party 3 and Bomberman. Within weeks, all the Nintendo hating PS2-lubbers love Nintendo for 'gracing' the PlayStation 2 with versions of their 'best' (worst) games. Bomberman for the PS2 is a complete success, receiving a high 96% in PSM2 with quotes:
"The graphics have been slightly improved from the N64 version, but even so it pushes the PS2 to its limits"
"This is one of the best games we've ever seen on the PS2"
Being a straight conversion of Bomberman 64, it was widely praised by the PS2 masses, despite many Ninties saying that it was in the worst ten N64 games.
Also announced was the widely acclaimed 'Super Mario X'. Apparently Nintendo really are giving their award winning mascot a facelift, because in this new incarnation he'll be growing machine guns and a big beefy bazooka to satisfy the trigger happy Xbox fans. Chief programmer Shigeru Miyamoto had this to say:
"Mario on the Xbox is going to be completely different. To fit into the Xbox mould, we're going to make this a deathmatch/mission based multiplayer shoot 'em up with rocket launchers and flamethrowers. Mario can also get a big jetpack and the AI will be great."
The unbiased gaming industry received this news with many an 'err', but Super Mario X was still claimed to be one of the best games ever.
What's more, Zelda: Majora's mask, links second outing on the N64 was ported terribly for the Dreamcast, and received in such a manner as well. Highly hyped, it suffered from aweful music, terrible clipping and general 'bad conversion' syndrome. Ninty fans praised, DCs looked on frowning. We can only hope that Nintendo have a future as a producer of games only...
...Microsoft HAD bought out Nintendo back in 2001?
Nintendo has undergone a huge facelift this year. Its Japan based headquarters were airlifted to Bill Gates' estate in California, Shigeru Miyamoto was fired as chief designer and The Rock was employed to survey game development. Mario was turned into a WWF wrestler and had a gun surgically grafted to his arm. The much coveted 'Nintendo Dolphin' was released in September under the new name, Microsoft N-Cube. Bill Gates replaced Hiroshi Yamauchi as company president, much to the delight of many former Nintendo fans, but the new look for Nintendo totally undermined the wide spread partying.
Following Microsoft's success after buying out Nintendo, Apple then bought out Sega in a furious attempt to foil Bill Gates in the console wars. After huge marketing campaigns, false statements and a very embarrasing incident at E3 in which Bill Gates sent a Syzygy virus to the Apple side of the showroom, shutting down all of the AppleCast consoles; The console war is literally turning into just that. American swat teams, funded by Bill Gates, are scouring the mountains and canyon(s) of Arizona hoping to force out the last remnants of the once glorius Apple company. Meanwhile, Sony was doing quite nicely building up massive profits in Japan since the two other American based companies merely 'forgot' it was there.
...Grand Theft Auto 3 forgot to get rated.
DMA design and Rockstar were put out of business today after millions of lawsuits against forced the biggest courtroom payout ever. Rockstar was forced to pay the massive amount of $10,000,000,000,000,000,090 after literally thousands of parents had to take their children to rehabilitation centers after being paralyzed by the awefully adult content.
One mother had this to say:
"Johnny died after seeing this sickening game. He only played it for thirteen hours a day, eight days a week, and it is entirely the fault of the bad people who played Grand Theft Auto 3. Despite the fact he died two years before the game was released, I'm sure it contributed to his death by its evil gratuitous nature."
Although this was the only case related to GTA3 which was thrown out of court, it was a milestone in gaming achievements:
"The gaming industry has had to pay out countless times for totally unrelated incidents. I remember last year when a little boy blew up his head in a microwave because he'd been playing Mario Kart. The developers tried to convince the judge that Mario's hands were too chunky to use a microwave, but he still ordered Nintendo to get the microwave cleaned. This recent case is the first time a judge hasn't blamed videogames for the way the world is."
And in response to September the 11th, relatives of the victims have brought massive charges against Microsoft, because apparently Osama Bin Laden plays video games. Despite probably only owning a 486 at the most, he played Microsoft Flight Simulator which spurred on his plans. This is totally ridiculous, but because of the way of the world and the totally anti-gaming attitude the world takes on, gaming is to blame for everything. Also global warming.
I just wanted to write down a few ideas, because it is scary to think what would have happened instead of what did. Imagine if the allies LOST WW2... We could all be playing Zooper Fritzio vier und sechzig...
That was really good, but some off those were preilously close to being reality for my liking...
Good post...
I alsways wonder what would have happened is MS did buy Sega as reported, or if SNK had become a big player in the market.
Sonic
I alsways wonder what would have happened is MS did buy Sega as reported, or if SNK had become a big player in the market.
Sonic
...Sega was still in business and Nintendo was bust?
Imagine it. 2001. Nintendo have just announced the failure of their N64, and that they'll stop manufacturing consoles once and for all. A few days later, they announce PlayStation 2 versions of Dr. Mario, Mario Party 3 and Bomberman. Within weeks, all the Nintendo hating PS2-lubbers love Nintendo for 'gracing' the PlayStation 2 with versions of their 'best' (worst) games. Bomberman for the PS2 is a complete success, receiving a high 96% in PSM2 with quotes:
"The graphics have been slightly improved from the N64 version, but even so it pushes the PS2 to its limits"
"This is one of the best games we've ever seen on the PS2"
Being a straight conversion of Bomberman 64, it was widely praised by the PS2 masses, despite many Ninties saying that it was in the worst ten N64 games.
Also announced was the widely acclaimed 'Super Mario X'. Apparently Nintendo really are giving their award winning mascot a facelift, because in this new incarnation he'll be growing machine guns and a big beefy bazooka to satisfy the trigger happy Xbox fans. Chief programmer Shigeru Miyamoto had this to say:
"Mario on the Xbox is going to be completely different. To fit into the Xbox mould, we're going to make this a deathmatch/mission based multiplayer shoot 'em up with rocket launchers and flamethrowers. Mario can also get a big jetpack and the AI will be great."
The unbiased gaming industry received this news with many an 'err', but Super Mario X was still claimed to be one of the best games ever.
What's more, Zelda: Majora's mask, links second outing on the N64 was ported terribly for the Dreamcast, and received in such a manner as well. Highly hyped, it suffered from aweful music, terrible clipping and general 'bad conversion' syndrome. Ninty fans praised, DCs looked on frowning. We can only hope that Nintendo have a future as a producer of games only...
...Microsoft HAD bought out Nintendo back in 2001?
Nintendo has undergone a huge facelift this year. Its Japan based headquarters were airlifted to Bill Gates' estate in California, Shigeru Miyamoto was fired as chief designer and The Rock was employed to survey game development. Mario was turned into a WWF wrestler and had a gun surgically grafted to his arm. The much coveted 'Nintendo Dolphin' was released in September under the new name, Microsoft N-Cube. Bill Gates replaced Hiroshi Yamauchi as company president, much to the delight of many former Nintendo fans, but the new look for Nintendo totally undermined the wide spread partying.
Following Microsoft's success after buying out Nintendo, Apple then bought out Sega in a furious attempt to foil Bill Gates in the console wars. After huge marketing campaigns, false statements and a very embarrasing incident at E3 in which Bill Gates sent a Syzygy virus to the Apple side of the showroom, shutting down all of the AppleCast consoles; The console war is literally turning into just that. American swat teams, funded by Bill Gates, are scouring the mountains and canyon(s) of Arizona hoping to force out the last remnants of the once glorius Apple company. Meanwhile, Sony was doing quite nicely building up massive profits in Japan since the two other American based companies merely 'forgot' it was there.
...Grand Theft Auto 3 forgot to get rated.
DMA design and Rockstar were put out of business today after millions of lawsuits against forced the biggest courtroom payout ever. Rockstar was forced to pay the massive amount of $10,000,000,000,000,000,090 after literally thousands of parents had to take their children to rehabilitation centers after being paralyzed by the awefully adult content.
One mother had this to say:
"Johnny died after seeing this sickening game. He only played it for thirteen hours a day, eight days a week, and it is entirely the fault of the bad people who played Grand Theft Auto 3. Despite the fact he died two years before the game was released, I'm sure it contributed to his death by its evil gratuitous nature."
Although this was the only case related to GTA3 which was thrown out of court, it was a milestone in gaming achievements:
"The gaming industry has had to pay out countless times for totally unrelated incidents. I remember last year when a little boy blew up his head in a microwave because he'd been playing Mario Kart. The developers tried to convince the judge that Mario's hands were too chunky to use a microwave, but he still ordered Nintendo to get the microwave cleaned. This recent case is the first time a judge hasn't blamed videogames for the way the world is."
And in response to September the 11th, relatives of the victims have brought massive charges against Microsoft, because apparently Osama Bin Laden plays video games. Despite probably only owning a 486 at the most, he played Microsoft Flight Simulator which spurred on his plans. This is totally ridiculous, but because of the way of the world and the totally anti-gaming attitude the world takes on, gaming is to blame for everything. Also global warming.
I just wanted to write down a few ideas, because it is scary to think what would have happened instead of what did. Imagine if the allies LOST WW2... We could all be playing Zooper Fritzio vier und sechzig...
Imagine it. 2001. Nintendo have just announced the failure of their N64, and that they'll stop manufacturing consoles once and for all. A few days later, they announce PlayStation 2 versions of Dr. Mario, Mario Party 3 and Bomberman. Within weeks, all the Nintendo hating PS2-lubbers love Nintendo for 'gracing' the PlayStation 2 with versions of their 'best' (worst) games. Bomberman for the PS2 is a complete success, receiving a high 96% in PSM2 with quotes:
"The graphics have been slightly improved from the N64 version, but even so it pushes the PS2 to its limits"
"This is one of the best games we've ever seen on the PS2"
Being a straight conversion of Bomberman 64, it was widely praised by the PS2 masses, despite many Ninties saying that it was in the worst ten N64 games.
Also announced was the widely acclaimed 'Super Mario X'. Apparently Nintendo really are giving their award winning mascot a facelift, because in this new incarnation he'll be growing machine guns and a big beefy bazooka to satisfy the trigger happy Xbox fans. Chief programmer Shigeru Miyamoto had this to say:
"Mario on the Xbox is going to be completely different. To fit into the Xbox mould, we're going to make this a deathmatch/mission based multiplayer shoot 'em up with rocket launchers and flamethrowers. Mario can also get a big jetpack and the AI will be great."
The unbiased gaming industry received this news with many an 'err', but Super Mario X was still claimed to be one of the best games ever.
What's more, Zelda: Majora's mask, links second outing on the N64 was ported terribly for the Dreamcast, and received in such a manner as well. Highly hyped, it suffered from aweful music, terrible clipping and general 'bad conversion' syndrome. Ninty fans praised, DCs looked on frowning. We can only hope that Nintendo have a future as a producer of games only...
...Microsoft HAD bought out Nintendo back in 2001?
Nintendo has undergone a huge facelift this year. Its Japan based headquarters were airlifted to Bill Gates' estate in California, Shigeru Miyamoto was fired as chief designer and The Rock was employed to survey game development. Mario was turned into a WWF wrestler and had a gun surgically grafted to his arm. The much coveted 'Nintendo Dolphin' was released in September under the new name, Microsoft N-Cube. Bill Gates replaced Hiroshi Yamauchi as company president, much to the delight of many former Nintendo fans, but the new look for Nintendo totally undermined the wide spread partying.
Following Microsoft's success after buying out Nintendo, Apple then bought out Sega in a furious attempt to foil Bill Gates in the console wars. After huge marketing campaigns, false statements and a very embarrasing incident at E3 in which Bill Gates sent a Syzygy virus to the Apple side of the showroom, shutting down all of the AppleCast consoles; The console war is literally turning into just that. American swat teams, funded by Bill Gates, are scouring the mountains and canyon(s) of Arizona hoping to force out the last remnants of the once glorius Apple company. Meanwhile, Sony was doing quite nicely building up massive profits in Japan since the two other American based companies merely 'forgot' it was there.
...Grand Theft Auto 3 forgot to get rated.
DMA design and Rockstar were put out of business today after millions of lawsuits against forced the biggest courtroom payout ever. Rockstar was forced to pay the massive amount of $10,000,000,000,000,000,090 after literally thousands of parents had to take their children to rehabilitation centers after being paralyzed by the awefully adult content.
One mother had this to say:
"Johnny died after seeing this sickening game. He only played it for thirteen hours a day, eight days a week, and it is entirely the fault of the bad people who played Grand Theft Auto 3. Despite the fact he died two years before the game was released, I'm sure it contributed to his death by its evil gratuitous nature."
Although this was the only case related to GTA3 which was thrown out of court, it was a milestone in gaming achievements:
"The gaming industry has had to pay out countless times for totally unrelated incidents. I remember last year when a little boy blew up his head in a microwave because he'd been playing Mario Kart. The developers tried to convince the judge that Mario's hands were too chunky to use a microwave, but he still ordered Nintendo to get the microwave cleaned. This recent case is the first time a judge hasn't blamed videogames for the way the world is."
And in response to September the 11th, relatives of the victims have brought massive charges against Microsoft, because apparently Osama Bin Laden plays video games. Despite probably only owning a 486 at the most, he played Microsoft Flight Simulator which spurred on his plans. This is totally ridiculous, but because of the way of the world and the totally anti-gaming attitude the world takes on, gaming is to blame for everything. Also global warming.
I just wanted to write down a few ideas, because it is scary to think what would have happened instead of what did. Imagine if the allies LOST WW2... We could all be playing Zooper Fritzio vier und sechzig...