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Received in an e-mail...
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He said: "I don't know why you wear a bra; you've got nothing to put in it."
She said: "You wear underpants, don't you?"
She said: "What do you mean by coming home half drunk?"
He said: "It's not my fault.... I ran out of money."
He said: "Since I first laid eyes on you, I've wanted to make love to you really badly."
She said: "Well, you succeeded."
He said: "Two inches more, and I would be a king."
She said: "Two inches less, and you'd be a queen."
On wall in ladies room: "My husband follows me everywhere."
Written just below it: "I do not."
He said: "Shall we try swapping positions tonight?"
She said: "That's a good idea.... you stand by the ironing board while I sit on the sofa and fart."
Priest: "I don't think you'll ever find another man like your late husband."
She said: "Who's going to look?"
He said: "What have you been doing with all the grocery money I gave you?"
She said: "Turn sideways and look in the mirror, you fat b'stard."
He said: "Let's go out and have some fun tonight."
She said: "Okay, but if you get home before I do, leave the hall light on."
He said: "Why don't you tell me when you have an orgasm?"
She said: "I would, but you're never there."
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He said: "I don't know why you wear a bra; you've got nothing to put in it."
She said: "You wear underpants, don't you?"
She said: "What do you mean by coming home half drunk?"
He said: "It's not my fault.... I ran out of money."
He said: "Since I first laid eyes on you, I've wanted to make love to you really badly."
She said: "Well, you succeeded."
He said: "Two inches more, and I would be a king."
She said: "Two inches less, and you'd be a queen."
On wall in ladies room: "My husband follows me everywhere."
Written just below it: "I do not."
He said: "Shall we try swapping positions tonight?"
She said: "That's a good idea.... you stand by the ironing board while I sit on the sofa and fart."
Priest: "I don't think you'll ever find another man like your late husband."
She said: "Who's going to look?"
He said: "What have you been doing with all the grocery money I gave you?"
She said: "Turn sideways and look in the mirror, you fat b'stard."
He said: "Let's go out and have some fun tonight."
She said: "Okay, but if you get home before I do, leave the hall light on."
He said: "Why don't you tell me when you have an orgasm?"
She said: "I would, but you're never there."
He he, that was a quality post.
It reminds me of the old Bob Monkhouse classic: "My wife and I have very active social lives, she goes out on Wednesdays, and I go out on Fridays."
Or alternatively, in an episode of Seinfeld, Jerry is talking to an ex of his, Elaine, about a bad date:
Elaine: You know what you're problem is, your standards are too high.
Jerry: I went out with you...
Elaine: That's because my standards are too low.
Great post, ROFL/LOL, etc...
Or alternatively, in an episode of Seinfeld, Jerry is talking to an ex of his, Elaine, about a bad date:
Elaine: You know what you're problem is, your standards are too high.
Jerry: I went out with you...
Elaine: That's because my standards are too low.
Great post, ROFL/LOL, etc...
The writing on the wall in the ladies' toilet was the best one. :D Classique.
Ho ho ho
Great stufff, Wookiee.
I liked "My husband follows me everywhere." "I do not." best.
:-)
Great stufff, Wookiee.
I liked "My husband follows me everywhere." "I do not." best.
:-)
Another product of you 'insanely bored' state Wookie?
teehee.....
Ahh the wonders on email....
Ahh the wonders on email....
Received in an e-mail...
-----
He said: "I don't know why you wear a bra; you've got nothing to put in it."
She said: "You wear underpants, don't you?"
She said: "What do you mean by coming home half drunk?"
He said: "It's not my fault.... I ran out of money."
He said: "Since I first laid eyes on you, I've wanted to make love to you really badly."
She said: "Well, you succeeded."
He said: "Two inches more, and I would be a king."
She said: "Two inches less, and you'd be a queen."
On wall in ladies room: "My husband follows me everywhere."
Written just below it: "I do not."
He said: "Shall we try swapping positions tonight?"
She said: "That's a good idea.... you stand by the ironing board while I sit on the sofa and fart."
Priest: "I don't think you'll ever find another man like your late husband."
She said: "Who's going to look?"
He said: "What have you been doing with all the grocery money I gave you?"
She said: "Turn sideways and look in the mirror, you fat b'stard."
He said: "Let's go out and have some fun tonight."
She said: "Okay, but if you get home before I do, leave the hall light on."
He said: "Why don't you tell me when you have an orgasm?"
She said: "I would, but you're never there."
-----
He said: "I don't know why you wear a bra; you've got nothing to put in it."
She said: "You wear underpants, don't you?"
She said: "What do you mean by coming home half drunk?"
He said: "It's not my fault.... I ran out of money."
He said: "Since I first laid eyes on you, I've wanted to make love to you really badly."
She said: "Well, you succeeded."
He said: "Two inches more, and I would be a king."
She said: "Two inches less, and you'd be a queen."
On wall in ladies room: "My husband follows me everywhere."
Written just below it: "I do not."
He said: "Shall we try swapping positions tonight?"
She said: "That's a good idea.... you stand by the ironing board while I sit on the sofa and fart."
Priest: "I don't think you'll ever find another man like your late husband."
She said: "Who's going to look?"
He said: "What have you been doing with all the grocery money I gave you?"
She said: "Turn sideways and look in the mirror, you fat b'stard."
He said: "Let's go out and have some fun tonight."
She said: "Okay, but if you get home before I do, leave the hall light on."
He said: "Why don't you tell me when you have an orgasm?"
She said: "I would, but you're never there."