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I'm talking about Metallica.
It has gotten to the point where it is an embarassment on a level with sheep-fiddling to admit you like Metallica.
But you have to immediately say "I mean OLD Metallica", so you aren't laughed out of the building.
I got into them at College, someone lent me "Justice For All" and told me to listen to "One" first, I was being eased into rock gently at that point.
And it ruled.
So did the earlier albums, "Master of Puppets" especially.
"Sanitarium" and "Orion" are behemoth like in their rockness.
"Justice" is a fantastic album, relentlessly inventive and hard. "Blackened" "Harvester of Sorrow" "Dyer's Eve".
All solid rock tracks.
Played by men with red faces and loud amps, legs wiiiide apart and doing that "Oi! Oi! Oi!" between songs.
ROCK
And then in my final year of College, they released the "Black" album.
First listen was promising.
"Enter Sandman" is a good tune, melodic and with actual bass you can hear.
"Sad But True", even better. This is good, this is Metallica I know and love.
But it starts to slide from there, until you hit "Nothing Else Matters"
At which point I weeped for lost rock and pansy ballads from a band that once wrote a song called "Kill 'em All".
Shameful.
And then it got worse.
"Load" followed, with them in make-up on the inlay card and videos and more rubbish songs. "Unforgiven 2" being one of the most painful. "2x4" still had a whiff of Metallimayhem, but it was getting weaker and weaker by the track.
"Reload". At this point, I cried into my leather jacket and shaved my hair off, so nobody might see me and say "Ha ha, he must like Metallica"
"Fuel" was pants, not a decent song on that album.
And then the album with the San Fransisco Philharmonic Orchestra. If they ever were in danger of being Spinal Tap, then that sealed it.
Hell, even the bass player walked out with the comment "We used to rock".
But he's back now, so the next album might be good.
But they have a lot of damage to repair.
James Hetfield went into rehab for alchohol, which is pretty rock, but they are still faced with their tubby, no-talent Danish Tennis-Pro drummer that has to play his toms to disguise the fact he keeps time worse than a sundial at night.
Metallica:
Used to rock, but turned pants.
It has gotten to the point where it is an embarassment on a level with sheep-fiddling to admit you like Metallica.
But you have to immediately say "I mean OLD Metallica", so you aren't laughed out of the building.
I got into them at College, someone lent me "Justice For All" and told me to listen to "One" first, I was being eased into rock gently at that point.
And it ruled.
So did the earlier albums, "Master of Puppets" especially.
"Sanitarium" and "Orion" are behemoth like in their rockness.
"Justice" is a fantastic album, relentlessly inventive and hard. "Blackened" "Harvester of Sorrow" "Dyer's Eve".
All solid rock tracks.
Played by men with red faces and loud amps, legs wiiiide apart and doing that "Oi! Oi! Oi!" between songs.
ROCK
And then in my final year of College, they released the "Black" album.
First listen was promising.
"Enter Sandman" is a good tune, melodic and with actual bass you can hear.
"Sad But True", even better. This is good, this is Metallica I know and love.
But it starts to slide from there, until you hit "Nothing Else Matters"
At which point I weeped for lost rock and pansy ballads from a band that once wrote a song called "Kill 'em All".
Shameful.
And then it got worse.
"Load" followed, with them in make-up on the inlay card and videos and more rubbish songs. "Unforgiven 2" being one of the most painful. "2x4" still had a whiff of Metallimayhem, but it was getting weaker and weaker by the track.
"Reload". At this point, I cried into my leather jacket and shaved my hair off, so nobody might see me and say "Ha ha, he must like Metallica"
"Fuel" was pants, not a decent song on that album.
And then the album with the San Fransisco Philharmonic Orchestra. If they ever were in danger of being Spinal Tap, then that sealed it.
Hell, even the bass player walked out with the comment "We used to rock".
But he's back now, so the next album might be good.
But they have a lot of damage to repair.
James Hetfield went into rehab for alchohol, which is pretty rock, but they are still faced with their tubby, no-talent Danish Tennis-Pro drummer that has to play his toms to disguise the fact he keeps time worse than a sundial at night.
Metallica:
Used to rock, but turned pants.
Hum.
I actually think The Black Album rocks. Call me a girl, but Nothing Else Matters makes a change from the harder stuff.
And, whatever you want to call me, Unforgiven II also rocked. Although the rest of the album sucks.
I actually think The Black Album rocks. Call me a girl, but Nothing Else Matters makes a change from the harder stuff.
And, whatever you want to call me, Unforgiven II also rocked. Although the rest of the album sucks.
I think his effete choice of clothing is affecting Hetfield's ability to rock out.
Old lyrics when Ulrich had hair and a head that weighed less than France:
"They think our heads are in their hands
but violent use brings violent plans
Keep him tied, it makes him well
he's getting better, can't you tell? " - Sanitarium
Compare with new Metallica with Ulrich in dressing gowns and silk briefs:
"So close no matter how far
couldn't be much more from the heart
forever trusting who we are
and nothing else matters" - Nothing Else Matters
Podgy, old man music.
Old lyrics when Ulrich had hair and a head that weighed less than France:
"They think our heads are in their hands
but violent use brings violent plans
Keep him tied, it makes him well
he's getting better, can't you tell? " - Sanitarium
Compare with new Metallica with Ulrich in dressing gowns and silk briefs:
"So close no matter how far
couldn't be much more from the heart
forever trusting who we are
and nothing else matters" - Nothing Else Matters
Podgy, old man music.
And he ties little bits of tape to his fingers like Michael Jackson. I'm suspect he has a monkey somewhere too.
ALL of their problems stem from the munchkin skinsmith.
I often wonder what it would have been like if Cliff had still been alive..
ALL of their problems stem from the munchkin skinsmith.
I often wonder what it would have been like if Cliff had still been alive..
LOL
I detect that a lot of their problems stem from a porky drummer.
This is true about his after-show wear and shorts.
I've seen pics on the inlay where he's got that towelling dressing down and some skimpy PE shorts on.
That's not rock.
I detect that a lot of their problems stem from a porky drummer.
This is true about his after-show wear and shorts.
I've seen pics on the inlay where he's got that towelling dressing down and some skimpy PE shorts on.
That's not rock.
Yeah and tell him to stop wearing dressing gowns and playing in football shorts from the 80's.
And make their moonfaced drummer go on a diet and get him to stop suing his fans for listening to music over the net.
They need to get rid of Bob Rock for a start.
Also they need to set a deadline for an album like:
Go into studio in March, come out with album in April (the same year).
Then they need to toss away all their rack units for their guitars and just plug into a Marshall turned up to 11.
Drink a shedload of booze, smoke some weed and play down and dirty rock.
C'mon Metallica, you were amazing once.
Also they need to set a deadline for an album like:
Go into studio in March, come out with album in April (the same year).
Then they need to toss away all their rack units for their guitars and just plug into a Marshall turned up to 11.
Drink a shedload of booze, smoke some weed and play down and dirty rock.
C'mon Metallica, you were amazing once.
"keeps time worse than a sundial at night"
Genius.
Genius.
I'm talking about Metallica.
It has gotten to the point where it is an embarassment on a level with sheep-fiddling to admit you like Metallica.
But you have to immediately say "I mean OLD Metallica", so you aren't laughed out of the building.
I got into them at College, someone lent me "Justice For All" and told me to listen to "One" first, I was being eased into rock gently at that point.
And it ruled.
So did the earlier albums, "Master of Puppets" especially.
"Sanitarium" and "Orion" are behemoth like in their rockness.
"Justice" is a fantastic album, relentlessly inventive and hard. "Blackened" "Harvester of Sorrow" "Dyer's Eve".
All solid rock tracks.
Played by men with red faces and loud amps, legs wiiiide apart and doing that "Oi! Oi! Oi!" between songs.
ROCK
And then in my final year of College, they released the "Black" album.
First listen was promising.
"Enter Sandman" is a good tune, melodic and with actual bass you can hear.
"Sad But True", even better. This is good, this is Metallica I know and love.
But it starts to slide from there, until you hit "Nothing Else Matters"
At which point I weeped for lost rock and pansy ballads from a band that once wrote a song called "Kill 'em All".
Shameful.
And then it got worse.
"Load" followed, with them in make-up on the inlay card and videos and more rubbish songs. "Unforgiven 2" being one of the most painful. "2x4" still had a whiff of Metallimayhem, but it was getting weaker and weaker by the track.
"Reload". At this point, I cried into my leather jacket and shaved my hair off, so nobody might see me and say "Ha ha, he must like Metallica"
"Fuel" was pants, not a decent song on that album.
And then the album with the San Fransisco Philharmonic Orchestra. If they ever were in danger of being Spinal Tap, then that sealed it.
Hell, even the bass player walked out with the comment "We used to rock".
But he's back now, so the next album might be good.
But they have a lot of damage to repair.
James Hetfield went into rehab for alchohol, which is pretty rock, but they are still faced with their tubby, no-talent Danish Tennis-Pro drummer that has to play his toms to disguise the fact he keeps time worse than a sundial at night.
Metallica:
Used to rock, but turned pants.
It has gotten to the point where it is an embarassment on a level with sheep-fiddling to admit you like Metallica.
But you have to immediately say "I mean OLD Metallica", so you aren't laughed out of the building.
I got into them at College, someone lent me "Justice For All" and told me to listen to "One" first, I was being eased into rock gently at that point.
And it ruled.
So did the earlier albums, "Master of Puppets" especially.
"Sanitarium" and "Orion" are behemoth like in their rockness.
"Justice" is a fantastic album, relentlessly inventive and hard. "Blackened" "Harvester of Sorrow" "Dyer's Eve".
All solid rock tracks.
Played by men with red faces and loud amps, legs wiiiide apart and doing that "Oi! Oi! Oi!" between songs.
ROCK
And then in my final year of College, they released the "Black" album.
First listen was promising.
"Enter Sandman" is a good tune, melodic and with actual bass you can hear.
"Sad But True", even better. This is good, this is Metallica I know and love.
But it starts to slide from there, until you hit "Nothing Else Matters"
At which point I weeped for lost rock and pansy ballads from a band that once wrote a song called "Kill 'em All".
Shameful.
And then it got worse.
"Load" followed, with them in make-up on the inlay card and videos and more rubbish songs. "Unforgiven 2" being one of the most painful. "2x4" still had a whiff of Metallimayhem, but it was getting weaker and weaker by the track.
"Reload". At this point, I cried into my leather jacket and shaved my hair off, so nobody might see me and say "Ha ha, he must like Metallica"
"Fuel" was pants, not a decent song on that album.
And then the album with the San Fransisco Philharmonic Orchestra. If they ever were in danger of being Spinal Tap, then that sealed it.
Hell, even the bass player walked out with the comment "We used to rock".
But he's back now, so the next album might be good.
But they have a lot of damage to repair.
James Hetfield went into rehab for alchohol, which is pretty rock, but they are still faced with their tubby, no-talent Danish Tennis-Pro drummer that has to play his toms to disguise the fact he keeps time worse than a sundial at night.
Metallica:
Used to rock, but turned pants.