The "General Games Chat" forum, which includes Retro Game Reviews, has been archived and is now read-only. You cannot post here or create a new thread or review on this forum.
Whilst Discussing things on the web, Morbo the Strange and Tribute the, erm, strange both asked themselves 0’ Why is there never an elephant in games these days?’. This isn’t what they came up with, but rather something that they made up to sound good. GO!
Tribute ~ Hello, and welcome to mine and Morbo’s pathetic attempt at trying to convince games developers to include Elephants in video games. Why? Because we want to, that is why! Over to you Morbo, it’s a bad crowd I tell ya…
Morbo ~ One of the only games to ever feature an elephant was Donkey Kong 2 on the SNES, and even then the elephant was useless. All he could do was run – Can Elephants run in real life? I bet that most of you cant name a game were the main character was an elephant. Think. Can You? Wouldn’t it be fun to control a giant elephant whose power was endless? Well I for one would love to be able to desolate huge cities with an elephant, or help a person in need, or fight big airplanes as bosses and evil scientists.
The game could involve you being tested on by a scientist and you have a super intelligence, and need to get revenge. As you go along you could pick up rocket launchers and hyper jets to let you go through water.
Tribute ~ But why aren’t there many games that have Elephants in? I bet there was one on the spectrum, but them aside; no ‘new’ games care about them. Why? The games industry is Fattyist. They hate all things fat. Fat people can’t be sex symbols. Fat people can’t jump about. Fat people can’t even run. The same goes for Fat Animals. They would just stand around and at stuff.
Going back to what Morbo said, wrecking things with an elephant would be cool, but extremely slow and they’d end up getting caught by the police after they start chomping at a cream cake store (Bakery to all you normal people), so developers chose dinosaurs over them. Can’t Elephants have their moment in the spotlight?
Morbo ~ Like I said if an Elephant did get a game, he could be super enhanced like other lovable characters such as, the talking dinosaurs out of turok. Think of the game, a genially modified elephant, with rocket launchers, mini guns, and other weapons. In most games once you run out of ammo you are as good as dead, but in this one you can use your huge strength and genetic speed to get through the level.
Tribute ~ Their could also be a ‘She’ Version where the female elephant has to destroy all the worst shops and fore her husband to rob all the best ones with his trunk. Points could be deducted for destroying designer shops.
We hope some SICK games developers desperate for ideas come and see this (Here’s hoping RARE check every once in a while) and take note. Thank you for reading.
Tribute and Morbo.
Tribute ~ Hello, and welcome to mine and Morbo’s pathetic attempt at trying to convince games developers to include Elephants in video games. Why? Because we want to, that is why! Over to you Morbo, it’s a bad crowd I tell ya…
Morbo ~ One of the only games to ever feature an elephant was Donkey Kong 2 on the SNES, and even then the elephant was useless. All he could do was run – Can Elephants run in real life? I bet that most of you cant name a game were the main character was an elephant. Think. Can You? Wouldn’t it be fun to control a giant elephant whose power was endless? Well I for one would love to be able to desolate huge cities with an elephant, or help a person in need, or fight big airplanes as bosses and evil scientists.
The game could involve you being tested on by a scientist and you have a super intelligence, and need to get revenge. As you go along you could pick up rocket launchers and hyper jets to let you go through water.
Tribute ~ But why aren’t there many games that have Elephants in? I bet there was one on the spectrum, but them aside; no ‘new’ games care about them. Why? The games industry is Fattyist. They hate all things fat. Fat people can’t be sex symbols. Fat people can’t jump about. Fat people can’t even run. The same goes for Fat Animals. They would just stand around and at stuff.
Going back to what Morbo said, wrecking things with an elephant would be cool, but extremely slow and they’d end up getting caught by the police after they start chomping at a cream cake store (Bakery to all you normal people), so developers chose dinosaurs over them. Can’t Elephants have their moment in the spotlight?
Morbo ~ Like I said if an Elephant did get a game, he could be super enhanced like other lovable characters such as, the talking dinosaurs out of turok. Think of the game, a genially modified elephant, with rocket launchers, mini guns, and other weapons. In most games once you run out of ammo you are as good as dead, but in this one you can use your huge strength and genetic speed to get through the level.
Tribute ~ Their could also be a ‘She’ Version where the female elephant has to destroy all the worst shops and fore her husband to rob all the best ones with his trunk. Points could be deducted for destroying designer shops.
We hope some SICK games developers desperate for ideas come and see this (Here’s hoping RARE check every once in a while) and take note. Thank you for reading.
Tribute and Morbo.
Damn, I'll have to think of another alibi....
uh. the correc title.. ROLO THE ELEPHANT TO THE RESCUE.
It doesn't have an Elephant in the title! That's my excus and I am sticking t it!
http://www.genesisproject.co.uk /Genesis/R/RoloToTheRescue.html
sorry it was called rolo to the rescue.
sorry it was called rolo to the rescue.
OH MY GOD! NOOOOOOO!
WRONG!! UTTERLY WRONG!! THERE WAS A SMASH HIT ON THE MEGA DRIVE CALLED ROLO THE ELEPHANT!!
Who wrote this utter babble? It is possibly the worst post - EVER!
Whilst Discussing things on the web, Morbo the Strange and Tribute the, erm, strange both asked themselves 0’ Why is there never an elephant in games these days?’. This isn’t what they came up with, but rather something that they made up to sound good. GO!
Tribute ~ Hello, and welcome to mine and Morbo’s pathetic attempt at trying to convince games developers to include Elephants in video games. Why? Because we want to, that is why! Over to you Morbo, it’s a bad crowd I tell ya…
Morbo ~ One of the only games to ever feature an elephant was Donkey Kong 2 on the SNES, and even then the elephant was useless. All he could do was run – Can Elephants run in real life? I bet that most of you cant name a game were the main character was an elephant. Think. Can You? Wouldn’t it be fun to control a giant elephant whose power was endless? Well I for one would love to be able to desolate huge cities with an elephant, or help a person in need, or fight big airplanes as bosses and evil scientists.
The game could involve you being tested on by a scientist and you have a super intelligence, and need to get revenge. As you go along you could pick up rocket launchers and hyper jets to let you go through water.
Tribute ~ But why aren’t there many games that have Elephants in? I bet there was one on the spectrum, but them aside; no ‘new’ games care about them. Why? The games industry is Fattyist. They hate all things fat. Fat people can’t be sex symbols. Fat people can’t jump about. Fat people can’t even run. The same goes for Fat Animals. They would just stand around and at stuff.
Going back to what Morbo said, wrecking things with an elephant would be cool, but extremely slow and they’d end up getting caught by the police after they start chomping at a cream cake store (Bakery to all you normal people), so developers chose dinosaurs over them. Can’t Elephants have their moment in the spotlight?
Morbo ~ Like I said if an Elephant did get a game, he could be super enhanced like other lovable characters such as, the talking dinosaurs out of turok. Think of the game, a genially modified elephant, with rocket launchers, mini guns, and other weapons. In most games once you run out of ammo you are as good as dead, but in this one you can use your huge strength and genetic speed to get through the level.
Tribute ~ Their could also be a ‘She’ Version where the female elephant has to destroy all the worst shops and fore her husband to rob all the best ones with his trunk. Points could be deducted for destroying designer shops.
We hope some SICK games developers desperate for ideas come and see this (Here’s hoping RARE check every once in a while) and take note. Thank you for reading.
Tribute and Morbo.
Tribute ~ Hello, and welcome to mine and Morbo’s pathetic attempt at trying to convince games developers to include Elephants in video games. Why? Because we want to, that is why! Over to you Morbo, it’s a bad crowd I tell ya…
Morbo ~ One of the only games to ever feature an elephant was Donkey Kong 2 on the SNES, and even then the elephant was useless. All he could do was run – Can Elephants run in real life? I bet that most of you cant name a game were the main character was an elephant. Think. Can You? Wouldn’t it be fun to control a giant elephant whose power was endless? Well I for one would love to be able to desolate huge cities with an elephant, or help a person in need, or fight big airplanes as bosses and evil scientists.
The game could involve you being tested on by a scientist and you have a super intelligence, and need to get revenge. As you go along you could pick up rocket launchers and hyper jets to let you go through water.
Tribute ~ But why aren’t there many games that have Elephants in? I bet there was one on the spectrum, but them aside; no ‘new’ games care about them. Why? The games industry is Fattyist. They hate all things fat. Fat people can’t be sex symbols. Fat people can’t jump about. Fat people can’t even run. The same goes for Fat Animals. They would just stand around and at stuff.
Going back to what Morbo said, wrecking things with an elephant would be cool, but extremely slow and they’d end up getting caught by the police after they start chomping at a cream cake store (Bakery to all you normal people), so developers chose dinosaurs over them. Can’t Elephants have their moment in the spotlight?
Morbo ~ Like I said if an Elephant did get a game, he could be super enhanced like other lovable characters such as, the talking dinosaurs out of turok. Think of the game, a genially modified elephant, with rocket launchers, mini guns, and other weapons. In most games once you run out of ammo you are as good as dead, but in this one you can use your huge strength and genetic speed to get through the level.
Tribute ~ Their could also be a ‘She’ Version where the female elephant has to destroy all the worst shops and fore her husband to rob all the best ones with his trunk. Points could be deducted for destroying designer shops.
We hope some SICK games developers desperate for ideas come and see this (Here’s hoping RARE check every once in a while) and take note. Thank you for reading.
Tribute and Morbo.