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Well actually it’s a few days prior to the Gamecube’s launch in America but hey who’s counting?
Oh you are.
This is what has been documented from his diary:
Woke up at 9.00am, I had a lie in due to the previous nights cocktail party where good old Hiroshi Yamauchi had attempted to name every level in Mario 64 and ended up telling everyone how the idea of Mario and his world came about. During the sixties he said the idea really came into frutition and went on to tell how one night he was experimenting with certain ‘mushrooms dishes’ and pipes and apparent visions that he recieved as a result telling him to make the game, that’s pretty much how the idea came about, if this ever gets out we’ll be in big trouble with even more grief from the Guardians Allianced, Rebelling Back Against Game Entertainment. (GARBAGE)
First port of call was the games development offices (I hate going down there, they’re all a bunch of kiss ups, plus to top it off I think they all have a slight BO problem, either that or something died down there). Anyway I made my way down there to see how work was proceeding with our newest creation Luigis Mansion and must say I was very disappointed with a number of issues concerning the game and immediently decided to e-mail my thoughts to the games developer.
This is what I wrote:
Luigis Mansion rethought
Dear Mr ******** (for the purpose of the post the identity of the recipient has been conveniently forgotten)
While looking at the Gamecube’s flagship title I noticed a few problems most ideas I put forward to you were used but giving you freedom for the majority of the game was obviously a big mistake. I can see that a lot of work now needs to be done, especially between the start of the first level and the end of the game.
Looks like the concept of the game went out of the window, I asked for Luigi to go looking for his lost brother encountering problems, puzzles and ghosts along the way and to throw in the age old Nintendo tradition of collecting coins scattered around for good measure but no, you added a Hoover element sucking up the coins, sucking up the ghosts, this isn’t 1993 and we ain’t the Ghostbusters!
When Luigi looses and the game ends why does he look like Droopy the dog (heh, he was cool) also before I get to personal and recite more disappointing factors of this ‘should be blockbuster’ title I would like to say one thing. I would much rather play Halo on the X Box! There I said it.
Yours, sincerely
Shigeru Miyamoto
Gave the letter to some man to post who generally hangs around outside the Nintendo building asking for a whiff of any new games and ideas I have, his name was Kazuo Hirai or something, didn’t really take much notice, I give him most of my letters to post. Heh, some people are real dedicated fans.
25th August 2001
First thing I was in a meeting to discuss the Gamecube’s launch across Europe but I had to cancel due to more important matters occurring at the last minute.
After the game of miniature golf I arrived back at my workplace when some man arrived at my office and rather aggressively presented me with the letter regarding Luigis Mansion that I had sent him by slapping it on my desk, verbal abuse occurred but with my wide eyed pose of ‘looking startled’ (That I had so often practised, Grix knows this one) he was stunned for a while and I was able to slip away. He chased me down the corridor screaming and abusing profanity, much name calling later he hit my sensitive spot by attacking the idea of Pikmin and told me to go plant a few peachy daisy’s and happy, happy roses which ironically is already exactly what I have in my garden, I use them to inspire myself and on many occasions have helped me come up with new ideas for games and the company.
I pretended to work for the rest of the day, the only thing that didn’t let me get off work entirely was the constant phone calls enquiring about our best kept Nintendo secrets, in pure Nintendo style I kept quiet about things, I ended up simply doing heavy breathing down the phone, I must remember to delay Zelda a bit more, I don’t like people playing my games before I have chance to announce the next one in line.
26th August 2001
Today with the upcoming launch of Gamecube in America I was to do some work on preparing for the European release and try to work out some advertising campaigns.
I took the day off
27th August 2001
Got a visit from Chris Stamper from Rare today to speak about forthcoming games and the like, while speaking with him I noticed he would say rather a lot of times forgotten words using some rather unorthodox vocabulary and would use some obviously made up words to look cool such as jeepers and CD compatible. He should really get out more and get a new trendy hair cut (like mine). God he drank a lot of coffee, it made his eyes stay wide open like, like......... Tiptup! Yeah Tiptup from Diddy Kong Racing, oh hey I wonder if that’s how he came about, huh, looks like that’s another analogy cracked by me, I’m so wonderful. I love me.
After the meeting (which I can’t remember what was about, I was secretly playing with my Rubix Cube and ‘special pen’ under the desk, I think I will take a closer looksey at that pen later, I think the light is better in the bathroom) I went to the shops to buy the new Village people A - Track, apparently though there isn’t one. While I was out and about like this I thought at least some people would have maybe recognised me but no, not one, not even a glance from anyone, although a couple of times I was mistaken for various members of the beatles. Maybe it’s the clothes. Nah.
27th August
Didn’t go to work today and made claims of illness, pushed all Nintendo games release dates back in the traditional fashion.
Heh, keeps those gamers on their toes.
Press released statements about the console wars, specifically stating that Gamecube will struggle because of lack of DVD capabilities and this may deter potential buyers. What’s a DVD? I think it’s something to do with the size of Laura Crofts Breasts, either way she’s not coming on my console.
Maybe I will delay my console until after the X Box and the PS2, giving me time to play those for a while. Yet another good idea by me.
To be continued... (maybe)
Thanks for reading
Starlight
Oh you are.
This is what has been documented from his diary:
Woke up at 9.00am, I had a lie in due to the previous nights cocktail party where good old Hiroshi Yamauchi had attempted to name every level in Mario 64 and ended up telling everyone how the idea of Mario and his world came about. During the sixties he said the idea really came into frutition and went on to tell how one night he was experimenting with certain ‘mushrooms dishes’ and pipes and apparent visions that he recieved as a result telling him to make the game, that’s pretty much how the idea came about, if this ever gets out we’ll be in big trouble with even more grief from the Guardians Allianced, Rebelling Back Against Game Entertainment. (GARBAGE)
First port of call was the games development offices (I hate going down there, they’re all a bunch of kiss ups, plus to top it off I think they all have a slight BO problem, either that or something died down there). Anyway I made my way down there to see how work was proceeding with our newest creation Luigis Mansion and must say I was very disappointed with a number of issues concerning the game and immediently decided to e-mail my thoughts to the games developer.
This is what I wrote:
Luigis Mansion rethought
Dear Mr ******** (for the purpose of the post the identity of the recipient has been conveniently forgotten)
While looking at the Gamecube’s flagship title I noticed a few problems most ideas I put forward to you were used but giving you freedom for the majority of the game was obviously a big mistake. I can see that a lot of work now needs to be done, especially between the start of the first level and the end of the game.
Looks like the concept of the game went out of the window, I asked for Luigi to go looking for his lost brother encountering problems, puzzles and ghosts along the way and to throw in the age old Nintendo tradition of collecting coins scattered around for good measure but no, you added a Hoover element sucking up the coins, sucking up the ghosts, this isn’t 1993 and we ain’t the Ghostbusters!
When Luigi looses and the game ends why does he look like Droopy the dog (heh, he was cool) also before I get to personal and recite more disappointing factors of this ‘should be blockbuster’ title I would like to say one thing. I would much rather play Halo on the X Box! There I said it.
Yours, sincerely
Shigeru Miyamoto
Gave the letter to some man to post who generally hangs around outside the Nintendo building asking for a whiff of any new games and ideas I have, his name was Kazuo Hirai or something, didn’t really take much notice, I give him most of my letters to post. Heh, some people are real dedicated fans.
25th August 2001
First thing I was in a meeting to discuss the Gamecube’s launch across Europe but I had to cancel due to more important matters occurring at the last minute.
After the game of miniature golf I arrived back at my workplace when some man arrived at my office and rather aggressively presented me with the letter regarding Luigis Mansion that I had sent him by slapping it on my desk, verbal abuse occurred but with my wide eyed pose of ‘looking startled’ (That I had so often practised, Grix knows this one) he was stunned for a while and I was able to slip away. He chased me down the corridor screaming and abusing profanity, much name calling later he hit my sensitive spot by attacking the idea of Pikmin and told me to go plant a few peachy daisy’s and happy, happy roses which ironically is already exactly what I have in my garden, I use them to inspire myself and on many occasions have helped me come up with new ideas for games and the company.
I pretended to work for the rest of the day, the only thing that didn’t let me get off work entirely was the constant phone calls enquiring about our best kept Nintendo secrets, in pure Nintendo style I kept quiet about things, I ended up simply doing heavy breathing down the phone, I must remember to delay Zelda a bit more, I don’t like people playing my games before I have chance to announce the next one in line.
26th August 2001
Today with the upcoming launch of Gamecube in America I was to do some work on preparing for the European release and try to work out some advertising campaigns.
I took the day off
27th August 2001
Got a visit from Chris Stamper from Rare today to speak about forthcoming games and the like, while speaking with him I noticed he would say rather a lot of times forgotten words using some rather unorthodox vocabulary and would use some obviously made up words to look cool such as jeepers and CD compatible. He should really get out more and get a new trendy hair cut (like mine). God he drank a lot of coffee, it made his eyes stay wide open like, like......... Tiptup! Yeah Tiptup from Diddy Kong Racing, oh hey I wonder if that’s how he came about, huh, looks like that’s another analogy cracked by me, I’m so wonderful. I love me.
After the meeting (which I can’t remember what was about, I was secretly playing with my Rubix Cube and ‘special pen’ under the desk, I think I will take a closer looksey at that pen later, I think the light is better in the bathroom) I went to the shops to buy the new Village people A - Track, apparently though there isn’t one. While I was out and about like this I thought at least some people would have maybe recognised me but no, not one, not even a glance from anyone, although a couple of times I was mistaken for various members of the beatles. Maybe it’s the clothes. Nah.
27th August
Didn’t go to work today and made claims of illness, pushed all Nintendo games release dates back in the traditional fashion.
Heh, keeps those gamers on their toes.
Press released statements about the console wars, specifically stating that Gamecube will struggle because of lack of DVD capabilities and this may deter potential buyers. What’s a DVD? I think it’s something to do with the size of Laura Crofts Breasts, either way she’s not coming on my console.
Maybe I will delay my console until after the X Box and the PS2, giving me time to play those for a while. Yet another good idea by me.
To be continued... (maybe)
Thanks for reading
Starlight
Hehehe.
Great post Starlight, mate! Really funny, and well worth the GAD.
Classic!
Great post Starlight, mate! Really funny, and well worth the GAD.
Classic!
MoJoJoJo wrote:
Looks like we may have the GAD for today, my spoofs never win :(
-------------
Knew I was right
Looks like we may have the GAD for today, my spoofs never win :(
-------------
Knew I was right
Welldone on the win you sly git...
it deserved to win the first time round though so i'll let you off.....
it deserved to win the first time round though so i'll let you off.....
Heh, loved this bit.
Press released statements about the console wars, specifically stating that Gamecube will struggle because of lack of DVD capabilities and this may deter potential buyers. What’s a DVD? I think it’s something to do with the size of Laura Crofts Breasts, either way she’s not coming on my console.
Funny all round. Nice one, good post.
Towlie
Press released statements about the console wars, specifically stating that Gamecube will struggle because of lack of DVD capabilities and this may deter potential buyers. What’s a DVD? I think it’s something to do with the size of Laura Crofts Breasts, either way she’s not coming on my console.
Funny all round. Nice one, good post.
Towlie
Poparoo
03:16 right now (oh hell yeah)
I'm off to watch the rest of the documentry on the Thing, then off to bed
I'm off to watch the rest of the documentry on the Thing, then off to bed
Heh, cheers Mojojojo, have a read of it.
I'll come back on later tonight and read yours I'm a little tired now.
:0)
I'll come back on later tonight and read yours I'm a little tired now.
:0)
Looks like we may have the GAD for today, my spoofs never win :(
Check out my new one, the Strykeinator though
Check out my new one, the Strykeinator though
Well actually it’s a few days prior to the Gamecube’s launch in America but hey who’s counting?
Oh you are.
This is what has been documented from his diary:
Woke up at 9.00am, I had a lie in due to the previous nights cocktail party where good old Hiroshi Yamauchi had attempted to name every level in Mario 64 and ended up telling everyone how the idea of Mario and his world came about. During the sixties he said the idea really came into frutition and went on to tell how one night he was experimenting with certain ‘mushrooms dishes’ and pipes and apparent visions that he recieved as a result telling him to make the game, that’s pretty much how the idea came about, if this ever gets out we’ll be in big trouble with even more grief from the Guardians Allianced, Rebelling Back Against Game Entertainment. (GARBAGE)
First port of call was the games development offices (I hate going down there, they’re all a bunch of kiss ups, plus to top it off I think they all have a slight BO problem, either that or something died down there). Anyway I made my way down there to see how work was proceeding with our newest creation Luigis Mansion and must say I was very disappointed with a number of issues concerning the game and immediently decided to e-mail my thoughts to the games developer.
This is what I wrote:
Luigis Mansion rethought
Dear Mr ******** (for the purpose of the post the identity of the recipient has been conveniently forgotten)
While looking at the Gamecube’s flagship title I noticed a few problems most ideas I put forward to you were used but giving you freedom for the majority of the game was obviously a big mistake. I can see that a lot of work now needs to be done, especially between the start of the first level and the end of the game.
Looks like the concept of the game went out of the window, I asked for Luigi to go looking for his lost brother encountering problems, puzzles and ghosts along the way and to throw in the age old Nintendo tradition of collecting coins scattered around for good measure but no, you added a Hoover element sucking up the coins, sucking up the ghosts, this isn’t 1993 and we ain’t the Ghostbusters!
When Luigi looses and the game ends why does he look like Droopy the dog (heh, he was cool) also before I get to personal and recite more disappointing factors of this ‘should be blockbuster’ title I would like to say one thing. I would much rather play Halo on the X Box! There I said it.
Yours, sincerely
Shigeru Miyamoto
Gave the letter to some man to post who generally hangs around outside the Nintendo building asking for a whiff of any new games and ideas I have, his name was Kazuo Hirai or something, didn’t really take much notice, I give him most of my letters to post. Heh, some people are real dedicated fans.
25th August 2001
First thing I was in a meeting to discuss the Gamecube’s launch across Europe but I had to cancel due to more important matters occurring at the last minute.
After the game of miniature golf I arrived back at my workplace when some man arrived at my office and rather aggressively presented me with the letter regarding Luigis Mansion that I had sent him by slapping it on my desk, verbal abuse occurred but with my wide eyed pose of ‘looking startled’ (That I had so often practised, Grix knows this one) he was stunned for a while and I was able to slip away. He chased me down the corridor screaming and abusing profanity, much name calling later he hit my sensitive spot by attacking the idea of Pikmin and told me to go plant a few peachy daisy’s and happy, happy roses which ironically is already exactly what I have in my garden, I use them to inspire myself and on many occasions have helped me come up with new ideas for games and the company.
I pretended to work for the rest of the day, the only thing that didn’t let me get off work entirely was the constant phone calls enquiring about our best kept Nintendo secrets, in pure Nintendo style I kept quiet about things, I ended up simply doing heavy breathing down the phone, I must remember to delay Zelda a bit more, I don’t like people playing my games before I have chance to announce the next one in line.
26th August 2001
Today with the upcoming launch of Gamecube in America I was to do some work on preparing for the European release and try to work out some advertising campaigns.
I took the day off
27th August 2001
Got a visit from Chris Stamper from Rare today to speak about forthcoming games and the like, while speaking with him I noticed he would say rather a lot of times forgotten words using some rather unorthodox vocabulary and would use some obviously made up words to look cool such as jeepers and CD compatible. He should really get out more and get a new trendy hair cut (like mine). God he drank a lot of coffee, it made his eyes stay wide open like, like......... Tiptup! Yeah Tiptup from Diddy Kong Racing, oh hey I wonder if that’s how he came about, huh, looks like that’s another analogy cracked by me, I’m so wonderful. I love me.
After the meeting (which I can’t remember what was about, I was secretly playing with my Rubix Cube and ‘special pen’ under the desk, I think I will take a closer looksey at that pen later, I think the light is better in the bathroom) I went to the shops to buy the new Village people A - Track, apparently though there isn’t one. While I was out and about like this I thought at least some people would have maybe recognised me but no, not one, not even a glance from anyone, although a couple of times I was mistaken for various members of the beatles. Maybe it’s the clothes. Nah.
27th August
Didn’t go to work today and made claims of illness, pushed all Nintendo games release dates back in the traditional fashion.
Heh, keeps those gamers on their toes.
Press released statements about the console wars, specifically stating that Gamecube will struggle because of lack of DVD capabilities and this may deter potential buyers. What’s a DVD? I think it’s something to do with the size of Laura Crofts Breasts, either way she’s not coming on my console.
Maybe I will delay my console until after the X Box and the PS2, giving me time to play those for a while. Yet another good idea by me.
To be continued... (maybe)
Thanks for reading
Starlight
Oh you are.
This is what has been documented from his diary:
Woke up at 9.00am, I had a lie in due to the previous nights cocktail party where good old Hiroshi Yamauchi had attempted to name every level in Mario 64 and ended up telling everyone how the idea of Mario and his world came about. During the sixties he said the idea really came into frutition and went on to tell how one night he was experimenting with certain ‘mushrooms dishes’ and pipes and apparent visions that he recieved as a result telling him to make the game, that’s pretty much how the idea came about, if this ever gets out we’ll be in big trouble with even more grief from the Guardians Allianced, Rebelling Back Against Game Entertainment. (GARBAGE)
First port of call was the games development offices (I hate going down there, they’re all a bunch of kiss ups, plus to top it off I think they all have a slight BO problem, either that or something died down there). Anyway I made my way down there to see how work was proceeding with our newest creation Luigis Mansion and must say I was very disappointed with a number of issues concerning the game and immediently decided to e-mail my thoughts to the games developer.
This is what I wrote:
Luigis Mansion rethought
Dear Mr ******** (for the purpose of the post the identity of the recipient has been conveniently forgotten)
While looking at the Gamecube’s flagship title I noticed a few problems most ideas I put forward to you were used but giving you freedom for the majority of the game was obviously a big mistake. I can see that a lot of work now needs to be done, especially between the start of the first level and the end of the game.
Looks like the concept of the game went out of the window, I asked for Luigi to go looking for his lost brother encountering problems, puzzles and ghosts along the way and to throw in the age old Nintendo tradition of collecting coins scattered around for good measure but no, you added a Hoover element sucking up the coins, sucking up the ghosts, this isn’t 1993 and we ain’t the Ghostbusters!
When Luigi looses and the game ends why does he look like Droopy the dog (heh, he was cool) also before I get to personal and recite more disappointing factors of this ‘should be blockbuster’ title I would like to say one thing. I would much rather play Halo on the X Box! There I said it.
Yours, sincerely
Shigeru Miyamoto
Gave the letter to some man to post who generally hangs around outside the Nintendo building asking for a whiff of any new games and ideas I have, his name was Kazuo Hirai or something, didn’t really take much notice, I give him most of my letters to post. Heh, some people are real dedicated fans.
25th August 2001
First thing I was in a meeting to discuss the Gamecube’s launch across Europe but I had to cancel due to more important matters occurring at the last minute.
After the game of miniature golf I arrived back at my workplace when some man arrived at my office and rather aggressively presented me with the letter regarding Luigis Mansion that I had sent him by slapping it on my desk, verbal abuse occurred but with my wide eyed pose of ‘looking startled’ (That I had so often practised, Grix knows this one) he was stunned for a while and I was able to slip away. He chased me down the corridor screaming and abusing profanity, much name calling later he hit my sensitive spot by attacking the idea of Pikmin and told me to go plant a few peachy daisy’s and happy, happy roses which ironically is already exactly what I have in my garden, I use them to inspire myself and on many occasions have helped me come up with new ideas for games and the company.
I pretended to work for the rest of the day, the only thing that didn’t let me get off work entirely was the constant phone calls enquiring about our best kept Nintendo secrets, in pure Nintendo style I kept quiet about things, I ended up simply doing heavy breathing down the phone, I must remember to delay Zelda a bit more, I don’t like people playing my games before I have chance to announce the next one in line.
26th August 2001
Today with the upcoming launch of Gamecube in America I was to do some work on preparing for the European release and try to work out some advertising campaigns.
I took the day off
27th August 2001
Got a visit from Chris Stamper from Rare today to speak about forthcoming games and the like, while speaking with him I noticed he would say rather a lot of times forgotten words using some rather unorthodox vocabulary and would use some obviously made up words to look cool such as jeepers and CD compatible. He should really get out more and get a new trendy hair cut (like mine). God he drank a lot of coffee, it made his eyes stay wide open like, like......... Tiptup! Yeah Tiptup from Diddy Kong Racing, oh hey I wonder if that’s how he came about, huh, looks like that’s another analogy cracked by me, I’m so wonderful. I love me.
After the meeting (which I can’t remember what was about, I was secretly playing with my Rubix Cube and ‘special pen’ under the desk, I think I will take a closer looksey at that pen later, I think the light is better in the bathroom) I went to the shops to buy the new Village people A - Track, apparently though there isn’t one. While I was out and about like this I thought at least some people would have maybe recognised me but no, not one, not even a glance from anyone, although a couple of times I was mistaken for various members of the beatles. Maybe it’s the clothes. Nah.
27th August
Didn’t go to work today and made claims of illness, pushed all Nintendo games release dates back in the traditional fashion.
Heh, keeps those gamers on their toes.
Press released statements about the console wars, specifically stating that Gamecube will struggle because of lack of DVD capabilities and this may deter potential buyers. What’s a DVD? I think it’s something to do with the size of Laura Crofts Breasts, either way she’s not coming on my console.
Maybe I will delay my console until after the X Box and the PS2, giving me time to play those for a while. Yet another good idea by me.
To be continued... (maybe)
Thanks for reading
Starlight