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Welcome. You've probably come here, in agony of why those fools on tribes 2, counter strike and the like, always make fun of you when you sign on, ready to kick some terrorists/masculine suited men’s behinds. Well, you’ll probably find that there are some fatal flaws in your classical noobie attitude to online gaming, and I'll point these out to you, and possibly tell you how to correct these.
1. This is the biggie, the one that makes people actually consider playing on your team. It's the all important screen name. Most online noobs tend to pick names such as "smithgordon" or the more commonly chosen, "king, boss, or possibly the terminator" In online gaming, you will be ridiculed for having such names, without even one underscore, or spelling error or even a macho online title. If you want to be picked by that clan that has an annual fancy dress meeting (in which you will be called by your screen name), then you have to have a screen name, easily typed, and all especially machofied. For guaranteed success, use names with as many underscores or *'s as you can to make it look pretty, also, type in some random capital letters at the beginning of your name, and then possibly three or more underscores, to make it look like you are already in a clan. Don't forget, that most game players still, watch Conan the barbarian and/or xena the warrior princess AND fondly remember star trek episode 69. Consider this as to make your name appealing to this sort of audience. Also, include as much internet slang as is possible, just to make it known that you know what your talking about and not to be questioned. Once you’ve read this you’ll be coming up with attractive screen names such as, "LOL_***CoNaN_teh_PICCARD_Barbearian_:P_****" and don't try using that one, trust me, its taken.
1.5. Another rule of thumb, if your able to, make your characters appearance one of a lady's, this shows that you are a man with big breasts and therefore proving that you are a gaming god with breasts.
2. Now that you have your screen name, its time to get yourself into a clan. It seems daunting at first, but once you read these tips, youll be straight into "the_lauds_of:)_mAudar***" clan before you even want to be in it! Now many noobs carry the illusion with them that to get into a clan, you have to play on a server with skill, elegance using tactics, fortunately, this isn't true, as most of online gaming consists of boasting about the size of your breasts and trying to move clans, cleverly avoiding playing the actual game. Try to get married on everquest, it's the happening thing to do. Joining a clan is every noobs wish, to actually get into one, go into a recruiting chat page on a forum for your game of choice, and constantly, flame the server saying "CAN I PLSEA JOIN A CLAN,IGET SCORES OF OVER(twice your usual score)" If you make the server collapse, all the better, it impresses the online types who say rofl in their everday life. Very soon, someone (if your lucky, from the the_lauds_of:)_mAudar***) will approach you, and asks in which forums do you play in because he wants to watch you play. THIS IS A TRICK QUESTION don't tell him. Its a trap for noobies and if you fall into it, you will never gain respect. The right answer is to tell him that your mum wants to use the phone so you have to go now. Leave for a day, and when yoiu get back, youll be leader of the clan that you wanted to join as you seem to be a truly amazing guy. DO NOT TURN UP TO PRACTISES. Practises are another trap for noobs. Not going to them shows that you are too good for practises and your already cream of the_lauds_of:)_mAudar***. Job done.
2.5. Tell everyone that you made a map and make a link that doesn't exist for the,, they will think that it is their i.s.p's fault, not yours and they will take your word that it is revolutionary. By now you should be an online gaming legend.
3. This is the least important bit of online gaming, but here are some common gaming god ettiquette tips on how to behave whilst ACTUALLY playing the game. Now if you have broadband, make it clear at the beggining that you don't. To authentithicise this statement, just stand still at random moments in time to show that you are experiencing lag. REMEMBER, you are a gaming god, any mistakes you make, dont say the common "sorry, im playing crap today:)" note the mistakes, 1. blaming yourself 2. no spelling errors 3.there is punctuation the correct way to address the online community after a death or failure as a mage "I HADD nonone bacacking me up Thisf stupd modem is so slow laaag lol:)____" people wjp pla these games understand these problems and will love you just the same as they did or even more, but after all, it isn't hard to be a gaming god, you just have to know how.
Torticollis
1. This is the biggie, the one that makes people actually consider playing on your team. It's the all important screen name. Most online noobs tend to pick names such as "smithgordon" or the more commonly chosen, "king, boss, or possibly the terminator" In online gaming, you will be ridiculed for having such names, without even one underscore, or spelling error or even a macho online title. If you want to be picked by that clan that has an annual fancy dress meeting (in which you will be called by your screen name), then you have to have a screen name, easily typed, and all especially machofied. For guaranteed success, use names with as many underscores or *'s as you can to make it look pretty, also, type in some random capital letters at the beginning of your name, and then possibly three or more underscores, to make it look like you are already in a clan. Don't forget, that most game players still, watch Conan the barbarian and/or xena the warrior princess AND fondly remember star trek episode 69. Consider this as to make your name appealing to this sort of audience. Also, include as much internet slang as is possible, just to make it known that you know what your talking about and not to be questioned. Once you’ve read this you’ll be coming up with attractive screen names such as, "LOL_***CoNaN_teh_PICCARD_Barbearian_:P_****" and don't try using that one, trust me, its taken.
1.5. Another rule of thumb, if your able to, make your characters appearance one of a lady's, this shows that you are a man with big breasts and therefore proving that you are a gaming god with breasts.
2. Now that you have your screen name, its time to get yourself into a clan. It seems daunting at first, but once you read these tips, youll be straight into "the_lauds_of:)_mAudar***" clan before you even want to be in it! Now many noobs carry the illusion with them that to get into a clan, you have to play on a server with skill, elegance using tactics, fortunately, this isn't true, as most of online gaming consists of boasting about the size of your breasts and trying to move clans, cleverly avoiding playing the actual game. Try to get married on everquest, it's the happening thing to do. Joining a clan is every noobs wish, to actually get into one, go into a recruiting chat page on a forum for your game of choice, and constantly, flame the server saying "CAN I PLSEA JOIN A CLAN,IGET SCORES OF OVER(twice your usual score)" If you make the server collapse, all the better, it impresses the online types who say rofl in their everday life. Very soon, someone (if your lucky, from the the_lauds_of:)_mAudar***) will approach you, and asks in which forums do you play in because he wants to watch you play. THIS IS A TRICK QUESTION don't tell him. Its a trap for noobies and if you fall into it, you will never gain respect. The right answer is to tell him that your mum wants to use the phone so you have to go now. Leave for a day, and when yoiu get back, youll be leader of the clan that you wanted to join as you seem to be a truly amazing guy. DO NOT TURN UP TO PRACTISES. Practises are another trap for noobs. Not going to them shows that you are too good for practises and your already cream of the_lauds_of:)_mAudar***. Job done.
2.5. Tell everyone that you made a map and make a link that doesn't exist for the,, they will think that it is their i.s.p's fault, not yours and they will take your word that it is revolutionary. By now you should be an online gaming legend.
3. This is the least important bit of online gaming, but here are some common gaming god ettiquette tips on how to behave whilst ACTUALLY playing the game. Now if you have broadband, make it clear at the beggining that you don't. To authentithicise this statement, just stand still at random moments in time to show that you are experiencing lag. REMEMBER, you are a gaming god, any mistakes you make, dont say the common "sorry, im playing crap today:)" note the mistakes, 1. blaming yourself 2. no spelling errors 3.there is punctuation the correct way to address the online community after a death or failure as a mage "I HADD nonone bacacking me up Thisf stupd modem is so slow laaag lol:)____" people wjp pla these games understand these problems and will love you just the same as they did or even more, but after all, it isn't hard to be a gaming god, you just have to know how.
Torticollis
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Welcome. You've probably come here, in agony of why those fools on tribes 2, counter strike and the like, always make fun of you when you sign on, ready to kick some terrorists/masculine suited men’s behinds. Well, you’ll probably find that there are some fatal flaws in your classical noobie attitude to online gaming, and I'll point these out to you, and possibly tell you how to correct these.
1. This is the biggie, the one that makes people actually consider playing on your team. It's the all important screen name. Most online noobs tend to pick names such as "smithgordon" or the more commonly chosen, "king, boss, or possibly the terminator" In online gaming, you will be ridiculed for having such names, without even one underscore, or spelling error or even a macho online title. If you want to be picked by that clan that has an annual fancy dress meeting (in which you will be called by your screen name), then you have to have a screen name, easily typed, and all especially machofied. For guaranteed success, use names with as many underscores or *'s as you can to make it look pretty, also, type in some random capital letters at the beginning of your name, and then possibly three or more underscores, to make it look like you are already in a clan. Don't forget, that most game players still, watch Conan the barbarian and/or xena the warrior princess AND fondly remember star trek episode 69. Consider this as to make your name appealing to this sort of audience. Also, include as much internet slang as is possible, just to make it known that you know what your talking about and not to be questioned. Once you’ve read this you’ll be coming up with attractive screen names such as, "LOL_***CoNaN_teh_PICCARD_Barbearian_:P_****" and don't try using that one, trust me, its taken.
1.5. Another rule of thumb, if your able to, make your characters appearance one of a lady's, this shows that you are a man with big breasts and therefore proving that you are a gaming god with breasts.
2. Now that you have your screen name, its time to get yourself into a clan. It seems daunting at first, but once you read these tips, youll be straight into "the_lauds_of:)_mAudar***" clan before you even want to be in it! Now many noobs carry the illusion with them that to get into a clan, you have to play on a server with skill, elegance using tactics, fortunately, this isn't true, as most of online gaming consists of boasting about the size of your breasts and trying to move clans, cleverly avoiding playing the actual game. Try to get married on everquest, it's the happening thing to do. Joining a clan is every noobs wish, to actually get into one, go into a recruiting chat page on a forum for your game of choice, and constantly, flame the server saying "CAN I PLSEA JOIN A CLAN,IGET SCORES OF OVER(twice your usual score)" If you make the server collapse, all the better, it impresses the online types who say rofl in their everday life. Very soon, someone (if your lucky, from the the_lauds_of:)_mAudar***) will approach you, and asks in which forums do you play in because he wants to watch you play. THIS IS A TRICK QUESTION don't tell him. Its a trap for noobies and if you fall into it, you will never gain respect. The right answer is to tell him that your mum wants to use the phone so you have to go now. Leave for a day, and when yoiu get back, youll be leader of the clan that you wanted to join as you seem to be a truly amazing guy. DO NOT TURN UP TO PRACTISES. Practises are another trap for noobs. Not going to them shows that you are too good for practises and your already cream of the_lauds_of:)_mAudar***. Job done.
2.5. Tell everyone that you made a map and make a link that doesn't exist for the,, they will think that it is their i.s.p's fault, not yours and they will take your word that it is revolutionary. By now you should be an online gaming legend.
3. This is the least important bit of online gaming, but here are some common gaming god ettiquette tips on how to behave whilst ACTUALLY playing the game. Now if you have broadband, make it clear at the beggining that you don't. To authentithicise this statement, just stand still at random moments in time to show that you are experiencing lag. REMEMBER, you are a gaming god, any mistakes you make, dont say the common "sorry, im playing crap today:)" note the mistakes, 1. blaming yourself 2. no spelling errors 3.there is punctuation the correct way to address the online community after a death or failure as a mage "I HADD nonone bacacking me up Thisf stupd modem is so slow laaag lol:)____" people wjp pla these games understand these problems and will love you just the same as they did or even more, but after all, it isn't hard to be a gaming god, you just have to know how.
Torticollis
1. This is the biggie, the one that makes people actually consider playing on your team. It's the all important screen name. Most online noobs tend to pick names such as "smithgordon" or the more commonly chosen, "king, boss, or possibly the terminator" In online gaming, you will be ridiculed for having such names, without even one underscore, or spelling error or even a macho online title. If you want to be picked by that clan that has an annual fancy dress meeting (in which you will be called by your screen name), then you have to have a screen name, easily typed, and all especially machofied. For guaranteed success, use names with as many underscores or *'s as you can to make it look pretty, also, type in some random capital letters at the beginning of your name, and then possibly three or more underscores, to make it look like you are already in a clan. Don't forget, that most game players still, watch Conan the barbarian and/or xena the warrior princess AND fondly remember star trek episode 69. Consider this as to make your name appealing to this sort of audience. Also, include as much internet slang as is possible, just to make it known that you know what your talking about and not to be questioned. Once you’ve read this you’ll be coming up with attractive screen names such as, "LOL_***CoNaN_teh_PICCARD_Barbearian_:P_****" and don't try using that one, trust me, its taken.
1.5. Another rule of thumb, if your able to, make your characters appearance one of a lady's, this shows that you are a man with big breasts and therefore proving that you are a gaming god with breasts.
2. Now that you have your screen name, its time to get yourself into a clan. It seems daunting at first, but once you read these tips, youll be straight into "the_lauds_of:)_mAudar***" clan before you even want to be in it! Now many noobs carry the illusion with them that to get into a clan, you have to play on a server with skill, elegance using tactics, fortunately, this isn't true, as most of online gaming consists of boasting about the size of your breasts and trying to move clans, cleverly avoiding playing the actual game. Try to get married on everquest, it's the happening thing to do. Joining a clan is every noobs wish, to actually get into one, go into a recruiting chat page on a forum for your game of choice, and constantly, flame the server saying "CAN I PLSEA JOIN A CLAN,IGET SCORES OF OVER(twice your usual score)" If you make the server collapse, all the better, it impresses the online types who say rofl in their everday life. Very soon, someone (if your lucky, from the the_lauds_of:)_mAudar***) will approach you, and asks in which forums do you play in because he wants to watch you play. THIS IS A TRICK QUESTION don't tell him. Its a trap for noobies and if you fall into it, you will never gain respect. The right answer is to tell him that your mum wants to use the phone so you have to go now. Leave for a day, and when yoiu get back, youll be leader of the clan that you wanted to join as you seem to be a truly amazing guy. DO NOT TURN UP TO PRACTISES. Practises are another trap for noobs. Not going to them shows that you are too good for practises and your already cream of the_lauds_of:)_mAudar***. Job done.
2.5. Tell everyone that you made a map and make a link that doesn't exist for the,, they will think that it is their i.s.p's fault, not yours and they will take your word that it is revolutionary. By now you should be an online gaming legend.
3. This is the least important bit of online gaming, but here are some common gaming god ettiquette tips on how to behave whilst ACTUALLY playing the game. Now if you have broadband, make it clear at the beggining that you don't. To authentithicise this statement, just stand still at random moments in time to show that you are experiencing lag. REMEMBER, you are a gaming god, any mistakes you make, dont say the common "sorry, im playing crap today:)" note the mistakes, 1. blaming yourself 2. no spelling errors 3.there is punctuation the correct way to address the online community after a death or failure as a mage "I HADD nonone bacacking me up Thisf stupd modem is so slow laaag lol:)____" people wjp pla these games understand these problems and will love you just the same as they did or even more, but after all, it isn't hard to be a gaming god, you just have to know how.
Torticollis
in the tradition of my dear friend el blokey, POP.
pop
Heh, that was quite good. Well done.
why all the _s in the title though?
good topic :)
but this is like the 3rd one like this in last 3 days.
good topic :)
but this is like the 3rd one like this in last 3 days.
thankyou everyone, the underscore is a vital part in online gaming. its a nerdy code, the number oof underscores determines your personality
this is my first proper thread hopefully taking me off the noob list in sr, ive been here before but i still want constructive criticism as well as blind compliments
keep this aliv please, el blokey liked it
keep this alive please, el blokey liked it
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