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All men dream of having a large willy. It's been the way of the world, revolving around the bigger the better. This phrase can go for pretty much anything in games too, large things are great and make for a great game. Want proof? Read on.
I always laugh at games which have 'big head' mode. Adding humour, and a bit of unrealism to games, big head mode is funny because it shows off two things: how poor the character's faces really are, and that a serious situation can be made funny any day. Lots of different games use big head mode too, Kart racing games, shooting games, RolePlaying Games. Sometimes it can be taken as far as a Rayman look, with massive feet and hands, a huge head and a torso the size of a pea. Size is funny, and there's no denying that - it's human nature to ridicule the large.
But gaming loves the large, and that's true. Aside from some ridiculous extra modes, games not only let you live your dreams and fantasies, but also your wishes to be big. Not understanding my drift? Well, me neither, but what I'm on about is the scale of things in gaming. A character's life in gaming doesn't revolve around work, going to the pub then coming home and playing a bit of videogames, watching TV. Unless you're playing the Sims. No no, in videogames your character's life is big, whether it's racing cars in GT3 right at the top of the ladder, or exploring planets in Ratchet and Clank, or Haven - they're living their lives big.
Even so, that's not what I really want to talk about. I want to talk about being a giant. Ever since I heard the story of Jack and the Beanstalk, I've wanted to be a giant. Has anybody watched the Futurama episode where they all see what would happen if Bender is gigantic? If so, you'll know what I mean when I say being big would be great. Think about it - knocking over massive buildings, living with your head in the clouds 24/7. It'd be awesome. GodZilla: Kill all monsters Melee is pretty damn cool in this respect as well. Forget attention to detail - I'd prefer to be chucking skyscrapers around anyday than little bomb thingies in Smash Bros.
And there are also god games. If I was a giant, I would find myself a village and get the villagers to worship me! I would be a god! That would be great, and games such as Doshin and to an extent Black and White allow you to do just that. Gigantic people are hardnuts, and small people worship them. It's true in real life - people look up to hard people, and follow them round. All this talking about being beefy muscular men makes me want to be one. I can only dream.
There should be more big things in our world. I'm sick and tired of buying a chocolate bar, only to find I'm still hungry after eating it. I'd much prefer one of those 1.8KG beasts than a puny pathetic bar with eight pieces. Likewise, I'd so much rather play Steel Battalion with that £200 controller than with my Xbox controller, which I also prefer over the PS2 and GC. I love the Xbox because it's big, something to hold on to. But most of all, I love epic games, with huge creatures. Mountains to climb, not molehills. Dragons to kill, not rats. Because in games there are no limits, and I like to think as big as it gets. Not millionaire big - Bill Gates ultra-billionaire big. I want my games to cater for my needs for something big, and to the most part they do.
So what do we need in games? Altogether now... size! Size DOES matter, as I'm told by the junk mail in my e-mail inbox, and they're exactly right (to a certain extent). Kill the army, not the soldier. Destroy the skyscraper, not the wood-shack. And gimme that extra inch I've always wanted.
I always laugh at games which have 'big head' mode. Adding humour, and a bit of unrealism to games, big head mode is funny because it shows off two things: how poor the character's faces really are, and that a serious situation can be made funny any day. Lots of different games use big head mode too, Kart racing games, shooting games, RolePlaying Games. Sometimes it can be taken as far as a Rayman look, with massive feet and hands, a huge head and a torso the size of a pea. Size is funny, and there's no denying that - it's human nature to ridicule the large.
But gaming loves the large, and that's true. Aside from some ridiculous extra modes, games not only let you live your dreams and fantasies, but also your wishes to be big. Not understanding my drift? Well, me neither, but what I'm on about is the scale of things in gaming. A character's life in gaming doesn't revolve around work, going to the pub then coming home and playing a bit of videogames, watching TV. Unless you're playing the Sims. No no, in videogames your character's life is big, whether it's racing cars in GT3 right at the top of the ladder, or exploring planets in Ratchet and Clank, or Haven - they're living their lives big.
Even so, that's not what I really want to talk about. I want to talk about being a giant. Ever since I heard the story of Jack and the Beanstalk, I've wanted to be a giant. Has anybody watched the Futurama episode where they all see what would happen if Bender is gigantic? If so, you'll know what I mean when I say being big would be great. Think about it - knocking over massive buildings, living with your head in the clouds 24/7. It'd be awesome. GodZilla: Kill all monsters Melee is pretty damn cool in this respect as well. Forget attention to detail - I'd prefer to be chucking skyscrapers around anyday than little bomb thingies in Smash Bros.
And there are also god games. If I was a giant, I would find myself a village and get the villagers to worship me! I would be a god! That would be great, and games such as Doshin and to an extent Black and White allow you to do just that. Gigantic people are hardnuts, and small people worship them. It's true in real life - people look up to hard people, and follow them round. All this talking about being beefy muscular men makes me want to be one. I can only dream.
There should be more big things in our world. I'm sick and tired of buying a chocolate bar, only to find I'm still hungry after eating it. I'd much prefer one of those 1.8KG beasts than a puny pathetic bar with eight pieces. Likewise, I'd so much rather play Steel Battalion with that £200 controller than with my Xbox controller, which I also prefer over the PS2 and GC. I love the Xbox because it's big, something to hold on to. But most of all, I love epic games, with huge creatures. Mountains to climb, not molehills. Dragons to kill, not rats. Because in games there are no limits, and I like to think as big as it gets. Not millionaire big - Bill Gates ultra-billionaire big. I want my games to cater for my needs for something big, and to the most part they do.
So what do we need in games? Altogether now... size! Size DOES matter, as I'm told by the junk mail in my e-mail inbox, and they're exactly right (to a certain extent). Kill the army, not the soldier. Destroy the skyscraper, not the wood-shack. And gimme that extra inch I've always wanted.
All men dream of having a large willy. It's been the way of the world, revolving around the bigger the better. This phrase can go for pretty much anything in games too, large things are great and make for a great game. Want proof? Read on.
I always laugh at games which have 'big head' mode. Adding humour, and a bit of unrealism to games, big head mode is funny because it shows off two things: how poor the character's faces really are, and that a serious situation can be made funny any day. Lots of different games use big head mode too, Kart racing games, shooting games, RolePlaying Games. Sometimes it can be taken as far as a Rayman look, with massive feet and hands, a huge head and a torso the size of a pea. Size is funny, and there's no denying that - it's human nature to ridicule the large.
But gaming loves the large, and that's true. Aside from some ridiculous extra modes, games not only let you live your dreams and fantasies, but also your wishes to be big. Not understanding my drift? Well, me neither, but what I'm on about is the scale of things in gaming. A character's life in gaming doesn't revolve around work, going to the pub then coming home and playing a bit of videogames, watching TV. Unless you're playing the Sims. No no, in videogames your character's life is big, whether it's racing cars in GT3 right at the top of the ladder, or exploring planets in Ratchet and Clank, or Haven - they're living their lives big.
Even so, that's not what I really want to talk about. I want to talk about being a giant. Ever since I heard the story of Jack and the Beanstalk, I've wanted to be a giant. Has anybody watched the Futurama episode where they all see what would happen if Bender is gigantic? If so, you'll know what I mean when I say being big would be great. Think about it - knocking over massive buildings, living with your head in the clouds 24/7. It'd be awesome. GodZilla: Kill all monsters Melee is pretty damn cool in this respect as well. Forget attention to detail - I'd prefer to be chucking skyscrapers around anyday than little bomb thingies in Smash Bros.
And there are also god games. If I was a giant, I would find myself a village and get the villagers to worship me! I would be a god! That would be great, and games such as Doshin and to an extent Black and White allow you to do just that. Gigantic people are hardnuts, and small people worship them. It's true in real life - people look up to hard people, and follow them round. All this talking about being beefy muscular men makes me want to be one. I can only dream.
There should be more big things in our world. I'm sick and tired of buying a chocolate bar, only to find I'm still hungry after eating it. I'd much prefer one of those 1.8KG beasts than a puny pathetic bar with eight pieces. Likewise, I'd so much rather play Steel Battalion with that £200 controller than with my Xbox controller, which I also prefer over the PS2 and GC. I love the Xbox because it's big, something to hold on to. But most of all, I love epic games, with huge creatures. Mountains to climb, not molehills. Dragons to kill, not rats. Because in games there are no limits, and I like to think as big as it gets. Not millionaire big - Bill Gates ultra-billionaire big. I want my games to cater for my needs for something big, and to the most part they do.
So what do we need in games? Altogether now... size! Size DOES matter, as I'm told by the junk mail in my e-mail inbox, and they're exactly right (to a certain extent). Kill the army, not the soldier. Destroy the skyscraper, not the wood-shack. And gimme that extra inch I've always wanted.
I always laugh at games which have 'big head' mode. Adding humour, and a bit of unrealism to games, big head mode is funny because it shows off two things: how poor the character's faces really are, and that a serious situation can be made funny any day. Lots of different games use big head mode too, Kart racing games, shooting games, RolePlaying Games. Sometimes it can be taken as far as a Rayman look, with massive feet and hands, a huge head and a torso the size of a pea. Size is funny, and there's no denying that - it's human nature to ridicule the large.
But gaming loves the large, and that's true. Aside from some ridiculous extra modes, games not only let you live your dreams and fantasies, but also your wishes to be big. Not understanding my drift? Well, me neither, but what I'm on about is the scale of things in gaming. A character's life in gaming doesn't revolve around work, going to the pub then coming home and playing a bit of videogames, watching TV. Unless you're playing the Sims. No no, in videogames your character's life is big, whether it's racing cars in GT3 right at the top of the ladder, or exploring planets in Ratchet and Clank, or Haven - they're living their lives big.
Even so, that's not what I really want to talk about. I want to talk about being a giant. Ever since I heard the story of Jack and the Beanstalk, I've wanted to be a giant. Has anybody watched the Futurama episode where they all see what would happen if Bender is gigantic? If so, you'll know what I mean when I say being big would be great. Think about it - knocking over massive buildings, living with your head in the clouds 24/7. It'd be awesome. GodZilla: Kill all monsters Melee is pretty damn cool in this respect as well. Forget attention to detail - I'd prefer to be chucking skyscrapers around anyday than little bomb thingies in Smash Bros.
And there are also god games. If I was a giant, I would find myself a village and get the villagers to worship me! I would be a god! That would be great, and games such as Doshin and to an extent Black and White allow you to do just that. Gigantic people are hardnuts, and small people worship them. It's true in real life - people look up to hard people, and follow them round. All this talking about being beefy muscular men makes me want to be one. I can only dream.
There should be more big things in our world. I'm sick and tired of buying a chocolate bar, only to find I'm still hungry after eating it. I'd much prefer one of those 1.8KG beasts than a puny pathetic bar with eight pieces. Likewise, I'd so much rather play Steel Battalion with that £200 controller than with my Xbox controller, which I also prefer over the PS2 and GC. I love the Xbox because it's big, something to hold on to. But most of all, I love epic games, with huge creatures. Mountains to climb, not molehills. Dragons to kill, not rats. Because in games there are no limits, and I like to think as big as it gets. Not millionaire big - Bill Gates ultra-billionaire big. I want my games to cater for my needs for something big, and to the most part they do.
So what do we need in games? Altogether now... size! Size DOES matter, as I'm told by the junk mail in my e-mail inbox, and they're exactly right (to a certain extent). Kill the army, not the soldier. Destroy the skyscraper, not the wood-shack. And gimme that extra inch I've always wanted.