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AAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
Ah, that feels better. A little. Ugh. I feel so dirty. Must.. wash.. the filth.. away. Yeah, might work with wire wool for a sponge.
What makes me come here at this ungodly (oh boy, is that phrase accurate - that *had* to be the devil's work) hour, letting out text screams of anguish?
...hold on, the memories are back,
AAAAAAARRRGGHHHHH UCK AAARGH AAARGH AAARGH AAAAAAAAARRRRRGGGGGHHHHHHH
That should hold me for a while. Better i let it out like that than screaming for real, and waking every poor innocent fool in wales (yes, both of them ;-) )
An explaination. Okay. All i wanted was some nice swimming shorts. In my rubbish mid-wales town, yet again the lack of any halfway decent shops has forced me to take my money to the internet. Those catalogues that spam out junk mail to win £40,000 or whatever, i tried their site. I tried that argos additions thing, which odly enough was identical to one of the aforementioned catalogues. Almost as little of interest as in wales : )
So then i did it. What a fool i was. I searched under lycos for mens' swimwear. *sob* I got to this... horrible, horrible web site called kiniki. How could something sounding so similar to the ex-band of lauren laverne - that invariably nice tv presenter from planet pop a while ago, who even managed to keep her fingers clean presenting loves like a dog (remember that? classic tv :-) )... anyway, how could something with such innocent connotations be so evil?
So i got to said site, seeming to specialise in mens underwear and swimwear. I went straight to the swimwear link, and the page brought up a list, with pictures of all their stock. *sob* I started to scroll down, at first shocked, but not too concerned by the -large- pictures of each item.
'Okay' i thought to myself, 'it's selling swimming trunks, of course they show pictures of people wearing them. I scanned down, knowing what i was looking for. Fortunately, i found some nice shorts, pretty much what i was looking for, early on. While my fragile mind was still relatively stable. I figured that i'd keep going, down the -long- list of items, to see if anything better caught my eye. Oh, my eyes saw stuff okay. But not what i was hoping to buy.
*sob - for ever*
The swimming trunks seemed to be becoming smaller, while the bulges got bigger. Oh god no. It was horrible. Photo after photo. As i began to scroll faster, what could only be described as the most purely evil.. thing ever happened. A couple of times, the trunks had inserts in the pictures of what they looked like from behind. But until know they'd always been suitably... covering the models. *sob* As the trunks got smaller, the inserts showed more and more... ugh... backside.
That's when they truely damaged my poor mind....
...
Thongs!
Oh my god no. The bulges... the 'rear' photos... it was so horrible. *sob*
After a couple or grossly disturbing photos, i was scrolling down the page so fast i couldn't even see the individual products. I just wanted to get to the end. But the occasional glimpse of butt from the midst of the blur ensured i didn't even consider slowing down to look for 'nice' shorts.
Finally i got to the end, mercifully with only lower legs going off the top of my screen from the final product's photo.
I tired not to think what i had just been exposed to. But the single pair of shorts that wouldn't get you arrested for indecent exposure (at least if i was the police), were actually very nice. Closing my eyes, i scrolled back to the top, to look at the menu on the left. Remembering the product name, i'd be able to use the search facility to got to the shorts from the home page without having to see another... bulge *shudder*
Then i noticed other menu links. 'Spin that booty'. Again, i shuddered. But like fools visiting that site, bangedup, although i knew the content would be horrific, i couldn't help wondering. I'm sorry, i couldn't stop myself. I clicked. Fortunately, it took me to a page without any more pictures, but links to a selection of sub-sections. Reading them, i saw one entitled 'help me towel off'. That was it. I'd had a lucky escape with the lack of imediate content in 'spin that booty'. And i'd learned my lesson.
The browser closed, i tried desperately not to think about what i'd seen. Not so much a swimwear store, as a hideously masqueraded male porn site. Well, maybe not quite so explicit, but, damn, there should have at least been some kind of waring. 'This site contains pictures that should not be viewed by anyone under the age of... well, not by anyone actually.' Except it had to be seen to understand the true horror of being confronted with so many spandex-wrapped men's crotches.
Excuse me one second,
AAAAARRRRRRRGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
Thanks. I just really needed to let that out of my system.
Now, the only question left. Do i risk trying to buy the really nice swimming shorts? I think i could get there by the homepage and search bar without having to see any... midsections. But what if the search came up with two products? And do i really want to use my custom in such a way as to support such a horribly careless company? And further their chances of staying in business, online and available for people to see? I mean, some kid could...
It just doesn't bear thinking about. But they were nice shorts.
Anyway, how about it? Do i try to buy them? Or do i save my money for the therapy?
And if i decide to buy them, should i get a slightly pervy female to do it for me? Or would she never get round to going to the checkout? *sob*
Ah, that feels better. A little. Ugh. I feel so dirty. Must.. wash.. the filth.. away. Yeah, might work with wire wool for a sponge.
What makes me come here at this ungodly (oh boy, is that phrase accurate - that *had* to be the devil's work) hour, letting out text screams of anguish?
...hold on, the memories are back,
AAAAAAARRRGGHHHHH UCK AAARGH AAARGH AAARGH AAAAAAAAARRRRRGGGGGHHHHHHH
That should hold me for a while. Better i let it out like that than screaming for real, and waking every poor innocent fool in wales (yes, both of them ;-) )
An explaination. Okay. All i wanted was some nice swimming shorts. In my rubbish mid-wales town, yet again the lack of any halfway decent shops has forced me to take my money to the internet. Those catalogues that spam out junk mail to win £40,000 or whatever, i tried their site. I tried that argos additions thing, which odly enough was identical to one of the aforementioned catalogues. Almost as little of interest as in wales : )
So then i did it. What a fool i was. I searched under lycos for mens' swimwear. *sob* I got to this... horrible, horrible web site called kiniki. How could something sounding so similar to the ex-band of lauren laverne - that invariably nice tv presenter from planet pop a while ago, who even managed to keep her fingers clean presenting loves like a dog (remember that? classic tv :-) )... anyway, how could something with such innocent connotations be so evil?
So i got to said site, seeming to specialise in mens underwear and swimwear. I went straight to the swimwear link, and the page brought up a list, with pictures of all their stock. *sob* I started to scroll down, at first shocked, but not too concerned by the -large- pictures of each item.
'Okay' i thought to myself, 'it's selling swimming trunks, of course they show pictures of people wearing them. I scanned down, knowing what i was looking for. Fortunately, i found some nice shorts, pretty much what i was looking for, early on. While my fragile mind was still relatively stable. I figured that i'd keep going, down the -long- list of items, to see if anything better caught my eye. Oh, my eyes saw stuff okay. But not what i was hoping to buy.
*sob - for ever*
The swimming trunks seemed to be becoming smaller, while the bulges got bigger. Oh god no. It was horrible. Photo after photo. As i began to scroll faster, what could only be described as the most purely evil.. thing ever happened. A couple of times, the trunks had inserts in the pictures of what they looked like from behind. But until know they'd always been suitably... covering the models. *sob* As the trunks got smaller, the inserts showed more and more... ugh... backside.
That's when they truely damaged my poor mind....
...
Thongs!
Oh my god no. The bulges... the 'rear' photos... it was so horrible. *sob*
After a couple or grossly disturbing photos, i was scrolling down the page so fast i couldn't even see the individual products. I just wanted to get to the end. But the occasional glimpse of butt from the midst of the blur ensured i didn't even consider slowing down to look for 'nice' shorts.
Finally i got to the end, mercifully with only lower legs going off the top of my screen from the final product's photo.
I tired not to think what i had just been exposed to. But the single pair of shorts that wouldn't get you arrested for indecent exposure (at least if i was the police), were actually very nice. Closing my eyes, i scrolled back to the top, to look at the menu on the left. Remembering the product name, i'd be able to use the search facility to got to the shorts from the home page without having to see another... bulge *shudder*
Then i noticed other menu links. 'Spin that booty'. Again, i shuddered. But like fools visiting that site, bangedup, although i knew the content would be horrific, i couldn't help wondering. I'm sorry, i couldn't stop myself. I clicked. Fortunately, it took me to a page without any more pictures, but links to a selection of sub-sections. Reading them, i saw one entitled 'help me towel off'. That was it. I'd had a lucky escape with the lack of imediate content in 'spin that booty'. And i'd learned my lesson.
The browser closed, i tried desperately not to think about what i'd seen. Not so much a swimwear store, as a hideously masqueraded male porn site. Well, maybe not quite so explicit, but, damn, there should have at least been some kind of waring. 'This site contains pictures that should not be viewed by anyone under the age of... well, not by anyone actually.' Except it had to be seen to understand the true horror of being confronted with so many spandex-wrapped men's crotches.
Excuse me one second,
AAAAARRRRRRRGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
Thanks. I just really needed to let that out of my system.
Now, the only question left. Do i risk trying to buy the really nice swimming shorts? I think i could get there by the homepage and search bar without having to see any... midsections. But what if the search came up with two products? And do i really want to use my custom in such a way as to support such a horribly careless company? And further their chances of staying in business, online and available for people to see? I mean, some kid could...
It just doesn't bear thinking about. But they were nice shorts.
Anyway, how about it? Do i try to buy them? Or do i save my money for the therapy?
And if i decide to buy them, should i get a slightly pervy female to do it for me? Or would she never get round to going to the checkout? *sob*
We do have about three, but they're all rubbish : (
LOL!
Bad luck m8!
Just go down your local sportswear store, there MUST be one. There's normally at least ten in every town!
:)
Bad luck m8!
Just go down your local sportswear store, there MUST be one. There's normally at least ten in every town!
:)
AAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
Ah, that feels better. A little. Ugh. I feel so dirty. Must.. wash.. the filth.. away. Yeah, might work with wire wool for a sponge.
What makes me come here at this ungodly (oh boy, is that phrase accurate - that *had* to be the devil's work) hour, letting out text screams of anguish?
...hold on, the memories are back,
AAAAAAARRRGGHHHHH UCK AAARGH AAARGH AAARGH AAAAAAAAARRRRRGGGGGHHHHHHH
That should hold me for a while. Better i let it out like that than screaming for real, and waking every poor innocent fool in wales (yes, both of them ;-) )
An explaination. Okay. All i wanted was some nice swimming shorts. In my rubbish mid-wales town, yet again the lack of any halfway decent shops has forced me to take my money to the internet. Those catalogues that spam out junk mail to win £40,000 or whatever, i tried their site. I tried that argos additions thing, which odly enough was identical to one of the aforementioned catalogues. Almost as little of interest as in wales : )
So then i did it. What a fool i was. I searched under lycos for mens' swimwear. *sob* I got to this... horrible, horrible web site called kiniki. How could something sounding so similar to the ex-band of lauren laverne - that invariably nice tv presenter from planet pop a while ago, who even managed to keep her fingers clean presenting loves like a dog (remember that? classic tv :-) )... anyway, how could something with such innocent connotations be so evil?
So i got to said site, seeming to specialise in mens underwear and swimwear. I went straight to the swimwear link, and the page brought up a list, with pictures of all their stock. *sob* I started to scroll down, at first shocked, but not too concerned by the -large- pictures of each item.
'Okay' i thought to myself, 'it's selling swimming trunks, of course they show pictures of people wearing them. I scanned down, knowing what i was looking for. Fortunately, i found some nice shorts, pretty much what i was looking for, early on. While my fragile mind was still relatively stable. I figured that i'd keep going, down the -long- list of items, to see if anything better caught my eye. Oh, my eyes saw stuff okay. But not what i was hoping to buy.
*sob - for ever*
The swimming trunks seemed to be becoming smaller, while the bulges got bigger. Oh god no. It was horrible. Photo after photo. As i began to scroll faster, what could only be described as the most purely evil.. thing ever happened. A couple of times, the trunks had inserts in the pictures of what they looked like from behind. But until know they'd always been suitably... covering the models. *sob* As the trunks got smaller, the inserts showed more and more... ugh... backside.
That's when they truely damaged my poor mind....
...
Thongs!
Oh my god no. The bulges... the 'rear' photos... it was so horrible. *sob*
After a couple or grossly disturbing photos, i was scrolling down the page so fast i couldn't even see the individual products. I just wanted to get to the end. But the occasional glimpse of butt from the midst of the blur ensured i didn't even consider slowing down to look for 'nice' shorts.
Finally i got to the end, mercifully with only lower legs going off the top of my screen from the final product's photo.
I tired not to think what i had just been exposed to. But the single pair of shorts that wouldn't get you arrested for indecent exposure (at least if i was the police), were actually very nice. Closing my eyes, i scrolled back to the top, to look at the menu on the left. Remembering the product name, i'd be able to use the search facility to got to the shorts from the home page without having to see another... bulge *shudder*
Then i noticed other menu links. 'Spin that booty'. Again, i shuddered. But like fools visiting that site, bangedup, although i knew the content would be horrific, i couldn't help wondering. I'm sorry, i couldn't stop myself. I clicked. Fortunately, it took me to a page without any more pictures, but links to a selection of sub-sections. Reading them, i saw one entitled 'help me towel off'. That was it. I'd had a lucky escape with the lack of imediate content in 'spin that booty'. And i'd learned my lesson.
The browser closed, i tried desperately not to think about what i'd seen. Not so much a swimwear store, as a hideously masqueraded male porn site. Well, maybe not quite so explicit, but, damn, there should have at least been some kind of waring. 'This site contains pictures that should not be viewed by anyone under the age of... well, not by anyone actually.' Except it had to be seen to understand the true horror of being confronted with so many spandex-wrapped men's crotches.
Excuse me one second,
AAAAARRRRRRRGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
Thanks. I just really needed to let that out of my system.
Now, the only question left. Do i risk trying to buy the really nice swimming shorts? I think i could get there by the homepage and search bar without having to see any... midsections. But what if the search came up with two products? And do i really want to use my custom in such a way as to support such a horribly careless company? And further their chances of staying in business, online and available for people to see? I mean, some kid could...
It just doesn't bear thinking about. But they were nice shorts.
Anyway, how about it? Do i try to buy them? Or do i save my money for the therapy?
And if i decide to buy them, should i get a slightly pervy female to do it for me? Or would she never get round to going to the checkout? *sob*
Ah, that feels better. A little. Ugh. I feel so dirty. Must.. wash.. the filth.. away. Yeah, might work with wire wool for a sponge.
What makes me come here at this ungodly (oh boy, is that phrase accurate - that *had* to be the devil's work) hour, letting out text screams of anguish?
...hold on, the memories are back,
AAAAAAARRRGGHHHHH UCK AAARGH AAARGH AAARGH AAAAAAAAARRRRRGGGGGHHHHHHH
That should hold me for a while. Better i let it out like that than screaming for real, and waking every poor innocent fool in wales (yes, both of them ;-) )
An explaination. Okay. All i wanted was some nice swimming shorts. In my rubbish mid-wales town, yet again the lack of any halfway decent shops has forced me to take my money to the internet. Those catalogues that spam out junk mail to win £40,000 or whatever, i tried their site. I tried that argos additions thing, which odly enough was identical to one of the aforementioned catalogues. Almost as little of interest as in wales : )
So then i did it. What a fool i was. I searched under lycos for mens' swimwear. *sob* I got to this... horrible, horrible web site called kiniki. How could something sounding so similar to the ex-band of lauren laverne - that invariably nice tv presenter from planet pop a while ago, who even managed to keep her fingers clean presenting loves like a dog (remember that? classic tv :-) )... anyway, how could something with such innocent connotations be so evil?
So i got to said site, seeming to specialise in mens underwear and swimwear. I went straight to the swimwear link, and the page brought up a list, with pictures of all their stock. *sob* I started to scroll down, at first shocked, but not too concerned by the -large- pictures of each item.
'Okay' i thought to myself, 'it's selling swimming trunks, of course they show pictures of people wearing them. I scanned down, knowing what i was looking for. Fortunately, i found some nice shorts, pretty much what i was looking for, early on. While my fragile mind was still relatively stable. I figured that i'd keep going, down the -long- list of items, to see if anything better caught my eye. Oh, my eyes saw stuff okay. But not what i was hoping to buy.
*sob - for ever*
The swimming trunks seemed to be becoming smaller, while the bulges got bigger. Oh god no. It was horrible. Photo after photo. As i began to scroll faster, what could only be described as the most purely evil.. thing ever happened. A couple of times, the trunks had inserts in the pictures of what they looked like from behind. But until know they'd always been suitably... covering the models. *sob* As the trunks got smaller, the inserts showed more and more... ugh... backside.
That's when they truely damaged my poor mind....
...
Thongs!
Oh my god no. The bulges... the 'rear' photos... it was so horrible. *sob*
After a couple or grossly disturbing photos, i was scrolling down the page so fast i couldn't even see the individual products. I just wanted to get to the end. But the occasional glimpse of butt from the midst of the blur ensured i didn't even consider slowing down to look for 'nice' shorts.
Finally i got to the end, mercifully with only lower legs going off the top of my screen from the final product's photo.
I tired not to think what i had just been exposed to. But the single pair of shorts that wouldn't get you arrested for indecent exposure (at least if i was the police), were actually very nice. Closing my eyes, i scrolled back to the top, to look at the menu on the left. Remembering the product name, i'd be able to use the search facility to got to the shorts from the home page without having to see another... bulge *shudder*
Then i noticed other menu links. 'Spin that booty'. Again, i shuddered. But like fools visiting that site, bangedup, although i knew the content would be horrific, i couldn't help wondering. I'm sorry, i couldn't stop myself. I clicked. Fortunately, it took me to a page without any more pictures, but links to a selection of sub-sections. Reading them, i saw one entitled 'help me towel off'. That was it. I'd had a lucky escape with the lack of imediate content in 'spin that booty'. And i'd learned my lesson.
The browser closed, i tried desperately not to think about what i'd seen. Not so much a swimwear store, as a hideously masqueraded male porn site. Well, maybe not quite so explicit, but, damn, there should have at least been some kind of waring. 'This site contains pictures that should not be viewed by anyone under the age of... well, not by anyone actually.' Except it had to be seen to understand the true horror of being confronted with so many spandex-wrapped men's crotches.
Excuse me one second,
AAAAARRRRRRRGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
Thanks. I just really needed to let that out of my system.
Now, the only question left. Do i risk trying to buy the really nice swimming shorts? I think i could get there by the homepage and search bar without having to see any... midsections. But what if the search came up with two products? And do i really want to use my custom in such a way as to support such a horribly careless company? And further their chances of staying in business, online and available for people to see? I mean, some kid could...
It just doesn't bear thinking about. But they were nice shorts.
Anyway, how about it? Do i try to buy them? Or do i save my money for the therapy?
And if i decide to buy them, should i get a slightly pervy female to do it for me? Or would she never get round to going to the checkout? *sob*