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There are many potential hazards that can befall a dedicated gamer; thankfully after reading this handy guide you will have a contingency plan for many of the potential hazards that you may face, god speed.
Scenario:
After a marathon Timesplitters 2 session your hand is locked in controller holding position, resembling that of a crooked old woman who has been wrestling with the TV remote.
Solution:
Repetitive Strain Injury (Or RSI if you aren’t good with big words) can be a serious problem for the prolific gamer, furthermore if left untreated it can be serious enough to render your organelle so painful that gaming actually becomes unpleasant. Ideally you should rest your hand for at least 3 days. However this is too long without games, so…. There are methods to ease the pain. Firstly you should go for the warm bowl of water, give it a good steep and try to move your hand, if it is still sore you could try a bread and milk poultice. In the worst case scenario you will have to knock up a splint. To do this get yourself a handful of ice-lolly sticks and attach them to strategic areas of your hand to ease strain, sellotape is useful for this.
Scenario:
After 9 hours of retro final fantasy 7 fun your eyes feel like they are pulling so far out of your head they may fall onto your lap. Your vision is distorted to such an extent that you just healed an enemy with one of your spells.
Solution:
Ideally you should avoid looking at display screens for the best part of a day, however this is not always practical, especially if you just got to the bit that Cloud finds out he wasn’t really in soldier. So what you need to do is find a nice dark cupboard (or a bedroom with heavy curtains drawn) and stay in the darkness for 20-30 mins; you should be strongly accustomed to the darkness before you leave. Now try to get a few hours sleep, 5 at least and stick on some dark glasses (sunglasses are dark), this may seem inconvenient, but its better than wearing glasses.
Scenario:
After a night of Mario Party 4 with the lads you wake up to find the A, X and Y buttons are unusually sticky and unresponsive, you believe the culprit to be spilled beer.
Solution:
Your options are two-fold; buy a new controller, or try to repair the funky one. Repair is the cheapest option, so get down to B&Q and pick up a pack of precision screwdrivers for £1.28. Now grab the 2mm Flathead screwdriver from the pack and tackle those tri head screws, assuming you can get the screwdriver in the right place, and have the strength to turn the screws you should be alright. After the screws are out, remove the back casing, now remove the circuit board (be careful) you should see a grey rubber bit covering the buttons in question. Remove this and then take out the buttons, give them a thorough cleaning and replace them. Stick the grey bit back, and replace the circuit board. Replace the back casing and then the screws, then test that it’s working. Proper job.
Scenario:
Your bodily functions are interrupting the flow of your gameplaying, furthermore Resident Evil isn’t considerate enough to allow you to empty your bowels in a convenient, and sanitary place.
Solution:
You need to construct your own Gamers potty. You will need a wooden seat, a jigsaw, some spare wood, nailgun (or hammer and nails) and a children’s potty. Using the jigsaw cut a hole in the wooden seat in the area you would sit. Now below this make a small shelf with the spare wood and nails where the children’s potty will sit and can be easily slid in and out for emptying, after all you are a gamer, not a tink. Now you can relieve yourself where you sit. You may want to administer a blanket over your lap when you have guests over.
Scenario:
You have just been soundly thrashed by your little cousin at a game he doesn’t even own.
Solution:
You have two options here; the first is to blame the faulty electronics of your poor third party controller. To back this up you could quickly pour some beverage into your controller to make the buttons less responsive (after all you can fix it again by using the previously mention method). The second and more effective method is to knock out your cousin with a dart coated with a mild sedative, when he wakes up you can just pretend it was all a dream.
Scenario:
Some kid has been playing too close to the pylons with his kite and now there’s been a power-cut.
Solution:
Chances are that you haven’t saved for a while before the power-cut occurred, unfortunately that data cannot be recovered, so you will have to get by with a grimace and a swear word. After that’s over you are left with the fact that you still can’t play videogames, however all is not lost. Get a red felt tip and feign meningitis, now clutching your console and a portable TV make your way to the hospital. Get yourself admitted and get your console and TV hooked up to the back-up generator. After your own house has power again, wipe off the felt tip and make your way back home with your TV, console and no doubt a shot of penicillin.
Hopefully by employing these useful tips you will be able to raise an index finger to Mother Nature and keep getting your fix of electronic gaming pleasure. Remember; Stay safe, Stay gaming!
Thanks for reading.
Scenario:
After a marathon Timesplitters 2 session your hand is locked in controller holding position, resembling that of a crooked old woman who has been wrestling with the TV remote.
Solution:
Repetitive Strain Injury (Or RSI if you aren’t good with big words) can be a serious problem for the prolific gamer, furthermore if left untreated it can be serious enough to render your organelle so painful that gaming actually becomes unpleasant. Ideally you should rest your hand for at least 3 days. However this is too long without games, so…. There are methods to ease the pain. Firstly you should go for the warm bowl of water, give it a good steep and try to move your hand, if it is still sore you could try a bread and milk poultice. In the worst case scenario you will have to knock up a splint. To do this get yourself a handful of ice-lolly sticks and attach them to strategic areas of your hand to ease strain, sellotape is useful for this.
Scenario:
After 9 hours of retro final fantasy 7 fun your eyes feel like they are pulling so far out of your head they may fall onto your lap. Your vision is distorted to such an extent that you just healed an enemy with one of your spells.
Solution:
Ideally you should avoid looking at display screens for the best part of a day, however this is not always practical, especially if you just got to the bit that Cloud finds out he wasn’t really in soldier. So what you need to do is find a nice dark cupboard (or a bedroom with heavy curtains drawn) and stay in the darkness for 20-30 mins; you should be strongly accustomed to the darkness before you leave. Now try to get a few hours sleep, 5 at least and stick on some dark glasses (sunglasses are dark), this may seem inconvenient, but its better than wearing glasses.
Scenario:
After a night of Mario Party 4 with the lads you wake up to find the A, X and Y buttons are unusually sticky and unresponsive, you believe the culprit to be spilled beer.
Solution:
Your options are two-fold; buy a new controller, or try to repair the funky one. Repair is the cheapest option, so get down to B&Q and pick up a pack of precision screwdrivers for £1.28. Now grab the 2mm Flathead screwdriver from the pack and tackle those tri head screws, assuming you can get the screwdriver in the right place, and have the strength to turn the screws you should be alright. After the screws are out, remove the back casing, now remove the circuit board (be careful) you should see a grey rubber bit covering the buttons in question. Remove this and then take out the buttons, give them a thorough cleaning and replace them. Stick the grey bit back, and replace the circuit board. Replace the back casing and then the screws, then test that it’s working. Proper job.
Scenario:
Your bodily functions are interrupting the flow of your gameplaying, furthermore Resident Evil isn’t considerate enough to allow you to empty your bowels in a convenient, and sanitary place.
Solution:
You need to construct your own Gamers potty. You will need a wooden seat, a jigsaw, some spare wood, nailgun (or hammer and nails) and a children’s potty. Using the jigsaw cut a hole in the wooden seat in the area you would sit. Now below this make a small shelf with the spare wood and nails where the children’s potty will sit and can be easily slid in and out for emptying, after all you are a gamer, not a tink. Now you can relieve yourself where you sit. You may want to administer a blanket over your lap when you have guests over.
Scenario:
You have just been soundly thrashed by your little cousin at a game he doesn’t even own.
Solution:
You have two options here; the first is to blame the faulty electronics of your poor third party controller. To back this up you could quickly pour some beverage into your controller to make the buttons less responsive (after all you can fix it again by using the previously mention method). The second and more effective method is to knock out your cousin with a dart coated with a mild sedative, when he wakes up you can just pretend it was all a dream.
Scenario:
Some kid has been playing too close to the pylons with his kite and now there’s been a power-cut.
Solution:
Chances are that you haven’t saved for a while before the power-cut occurred, unfortunately that data cannot be recovered, so you will have to get by with a grimace and a swear word. After that’s over you are left with the fact that you still can’t play videogames, however all is not lost. Get a red felt tip and feign meningitis, now clutching your console and a portable TV make your way to the hospital. Get yourself admitted and get your console and TV hooked up to the back-up generator. After your own house has power again, wipe off the felt tip and make your way back home with your TV, console and no doubt a shot of penicillin.
Hopefully by employing these useful tips you will be able to raise an index finger to Mother Nature and keep getting your fix of electronic gaming pleasure. Remember; Stay safe, Stay gaming!
Thanks for reading.
It's Autumn. You should be used to 'em by now -
*leaves*
*leaves*
Thats not funny either
*leaves*
*leaves*
Whitestripes wrote:
> This should have been funny.
>
> *leaves*
Ha! You buffoon!
> This should have been funny.
>
> *leaves*
Ha! You buffoon!
How rude
*leaves*
*leaves*
This should have been funny.
*leaves*
*leaves*
There are many potential hazards that can befall a dedicated gamer; thankfully after reading this handy guide you will have a contingency plan for many of the potential hazards that you may face, god speed.
Scenario:
After a marathon Timesplitters 2 session your hand is locked in controller holding position, resembling that of a crooked old woman who has been wrestling with the TV remote.
Solution:
Repetitive Strain Injury (Or RSI if you aren’t good with big words) can be a serious problem for the prolific gamer, furthermore if left untreated it can be serious enough to render your organelle so painful that gaming actually becomes unpleasant. Ideally you should rest your hand for at least 3 days. However this is too long without games, so…. There are methods to ease the pain. Firstly you should go for the warm bowl of water, give it a good steep and try to move your hand, if it is still sore you could try a bread and milk poultice. In the worst case scenario you will have to knock up a splint. To do this get yourself a handful of ice-lolly sticks and attach them to strategic areas of your hand to ease strain, sellotape is useful for this.
Scenario:
After 9 hours of retro final fantasy 7 fun your eyes feel like they are pulling so far out of your head they may fall onto your lap. Your vision is distorted to such an extent that you just healed an enemy with one of your spells.
Solution:
Ideally you should avoid looking at display screens for the best part of a day, however this is not always practical, especially if you just got to the bit that Cloud finds out he wasn’t really in soldier. So what you need to do is find a nice dark cupboard (or a bedroom with heavy curtains drawn) and stay in the darkness for 20-30 mins; you should be strongly accustomed to the darkness before you leave. Now try to get a few hours sleep, 5 at least and stick on some dark glasses (sunglasses are dark), this may seem inconvenient, but its better than wearing glasses.
Scenario:
After a night of Mario Party 4 with the lads you wake up to find the A, X and Y buttons are unusually sticky and unresponsive, you believe the culprit to be spilled beer.
Solution:
Your options are two-fold; buy a new controller, or try to repair the funky one. Repair is the cheapest option, so get down to B&Q and pick up a pack of precision screwdrivers for £1.28. Now grab the 2mm Flathead screwdriver from the pack and tackle those tri head screws, assuming you can get the screwdriver in the right place, and have the strength to turn the screws you should be alright. After the screws are out, remove the back casing, now remove the circuit board (be careful) you should see a grey rubber bit covering the buttons in question. Remove this and then take out the buttons, give them a thorough cleaning and replace them. Stick the grey bit back, and replace the circuit board. Replace the back casing and then the screws, then test that it’s working. Proper job.
Scenario:
Your bodily functions are interrupting the flow of your gameplaying, furthermore Resident Evil isn’t considerate enough to allow you to empty your bowels in a convenient, and sanitary place.
Solution:
You need to construct your own Gamers potty. You will need a wooden seat, a jigsaw, some spare wood, nailgun (or hammer and nails) and a children’s potty. Using the jigsaw cut a hole in the wooden seat in the area you would sit. Now below this make a small shelf with the spare wood and nails where the children’s potty will sit and can be easily slid in and out for emptying, after all you are a gamer, not a tink. Now you can relieve yourself where you sit. You may want to administer a blanket over your lap when you have guests over.
Scenario:
You have just been soundly thrashed by your little cousin at a game he doesn’t even own.
Solution:
You have two options here; the first is to blame the faulty electronics of your poor third party controller. To back this up you could quickly pour some beverage into your controller to make the buttons less responsive (after all you can fix it again by using the previously mention method). The second and more effective method is to knock out your cousin with a dart coated with a mild sedative, when he wakes up you can just pretend it was all a dream.
Scenario:
Some kid has been playing too close to the pylons with his kite and now there’s been a power-cut.
Solution:
Chances are that you haven’t saved for a while before the power-cut occurred, unfortunately that data cannot be recovered, so you will have to get by with a grimace and a swear word. After that’s over you are left with the fact that you still can’t play videogames, however all is not lost. Get a red felt tip and feign meningitis, now clutching your console and a portable TV make your way to the hospital. Get yourself admitted and get your console and TV hooked up to the back-up generator. After your own house has power again, wipe off the felt tip and make your way back home with your TV, console and no doubt a shot of penicillin.
Hopefully by employing these useful tips you will be able to raise an index finger to Mother Nature and keep getting your fix of electronic gaming pleasure. Remember; Stay safe, Stay gaming!
Thanks for reading.
Scenario:
After a marathon Timesplitters 2 session your hand is locked in controller holding position, resembling that of a crooked old woman who has been wrestling with the TV remote.
Solution:
Repetitive Strain Injury (Or RSI if you aren’t good with big words) can be a serious problem for the prolific gamer, furthermore if left untreated it can be serious enough to render your organelle so painful that gaming actually becomes unpleasant. Ideally you should rest your hand for at least 3 days. However this is too long without games, so…. There are methods to ease the pain. Firstly you should go for the warm bowl of water, give it a good steep and try to move your hand, if it is still sore you could try a bread and milk poultice. In the worst case scenario you will have to knock up a splint. To do this get yourself a handful of ice-lolly sticks and attach them to strategic areas of your hand to ease strain, sellotape is useful for this.
Scenario:
After 9 hours of retro final fantasy 7 fun your eyes feel like they are pulling so far out of your head they may fall onto your lap. Your vision is distorted to such an extent that you just healed an enemy with one of your spells.
Solution:
Ideally you should avoid looking at display screens for the best part of a day, however this is not always practical, especially if you just got to the bit that Cloud finds out he wasn’t really in soldier. So what you need to do is find a nice dark cupboard (or a bedroom with heavy curtains drawn) and stay in the darkness for 20-30 mins; you should be strongly accustomed to the darkness before you leave. Now try to get a few hours sleep, 5 at least and stick on some dark glasses (sunglasses are dark), this may seem inconvenient, but its better than wearing glasses.
Scenario:
After a night of Mario Party 4 with the lads you wake up to find the A, X and Y buttons are unusually sticky and unresponsive, you believe the culprit to be spilled beer.
Solution:
Your options are two-fold; buy a new controller, or try to repair the funky one. Repair is the cheapest option, so get down to B&Q and pick up a pack of precision screwdrivers for £1.28. Now grab the 2mm Flathead screwdriver from the pack and tackle those tri head screws, assuming you can get the screwdriver in the right place, and have the strength to turn the screws you should be alright. After the screws are out, remove the back casing, now remove the circuit board (be careful) you should see a grey rubber bit covering the buttons in question. Remove this and then take out the buttons, give them a thorough cleaning and replace them. Stick the grey bit back, and replace the circuit board. Replace the back casing and then the screws, then test that it’s working. Proper job.
Scenario:
Your bodily functions are interrupting the flow of your gameplaying, furthermore Resident Evil isn’t considerate enough to allow you to empty your bowels in a convenient, and sanitary place.
Solution:
You need to construct your own Gamers potty. You will need a wooden seat, a jigsaw, some spare wood, nailgun (or hammer and nails) and a children’s potty. Using the jigsaw cut a hole in the wooden seat in the area you would sit. Now below this make a small shelf with the spare wood and nails where the children’s potty will sit and can be easily slid in and out for emptying, after all you are a gamer, not a tink. Now you can relieve yourself where you sit. You may want to administer a blanket over your lap when you have guests over.
Scenario:
You have just been soundly thrashed by your little cousin at a game he doesn’t even own.
Solution:
You have two options here; the first is to blame the faulty electronics of your poor third party controller. To back this up you could quickly pour some beverage into your controller to make the buttons less responsive (after all you can fix it again by using the previously mention method). The second and more effective method is to knock out your cousin with a dart coated with a mild sedative, when he wakes up you can just pretend it was all a dream.
Scenario:
Some kid has been playing too close to the pylons with his kite and now there’s been a power-cut.
Solution:
Chances are that you haven’t saved for a while before the power-cut occurred, unfortunately that data cannot be recovered, so you will have to get by with a grimace and a swear word. After that’s over you are left with the fact that you still can’t play videogames, however all is not lost. Get a red felt tip and feign meningitis, now clutching your console and a portable TV make your way to the hospital. Get yourself admitted and get your console and TV hooked up to the back-up generator. After your own house has power again, wipe off the felt tip and make your way back home with your TV, console and no doubt a shot of penicillin.
Hopefully by employing these useful tips you will be able to raise an index finger to Mother Nature and keep getting your fix of electronic gaming pleasure. Remember; Stay safe, Stay gaming!
Thanks for reading.