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"The REAL Unreal Tournament"

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This thread has been linked to the game 'Unreal Tournament'.
Wed 18/12/02 at 17:00
Regular
Posts: 787
Waaaaay back in the mists of time, the Romans controlled a lot of Europe. Pretty much all of it, in fact. Back in Rome, leisure time was often spent (by the aristocrats, at least) in a coliseum, watching well-oiled, well-muscled men fight each other with pointy sticks, and fight wild animals with really long pointy sticks. People often got hurt. More often than not, they died.

Mankind has evolved slightly since those hazy days. Instead of brutally murdering our fellow men in the name of entertainment, we kill them in the name of ‘peace and justice’ (at least, the USA does, but that’s another matter entirely). Anyways, most people prefer to blow each other apart using exceedingly violent computer games, such as Quake and Unreal Tournament. A strange concept, since (most of) these people would never dream of mutilating someone else in real life. Then I noticed how popular these games were becoming as a spectator sport, particularly at events such as the recent LANArena tournament in Nottingham. It got me wondering – in the future, what if this kind of arena fighting happened for REAL?

Picture this – old abandoned buildings and open spaces given a new lease of life by allowing people – ex-convicts, say – to kill each other with ridiculously powerful weapons for the benefit of an audience baying for blood. Hey, we do it with c***-fighting, why not do it with people? Maybe there could be some sort of prize, like a reduced sentence for the winner (although extra years could be added on secretly because of all the murders committed during the fight :) ).

Now, this might come across as a bit sick to some of you more conservative readers, so some sort of middle ground would have to be found. Maybe censored versions of the show could be televised before the watershed (like Robot Wars – the adult version is much more extreme…). Or possibly the contestants could only use laser-based weapons – instant cauterisation, so no gore!

Surely this could work in somewhere like America. Hell, violence is part of everyday life over there – why not make it a form of entertainment? Profiles could be built up over the best fighters, and leagues and teams could be set up: Prison against prison, that kind of thing. What’s to stop a worldwide league of armed convicts shooting each other in massive hi-tech arenas? It’s just the sort of thing that should appeal to the fight-hungry people of the world!

There will always be those who protest against such animalistic behaviour. Politicians, journalists, human rights activists…I say: Throw them in to, and see if they don’t start killing their fellow man! Obviously they’ll die if they don’t, but hey…

Games based on this format are hugely successful, so why can’t we try it for real? There are real races, and games based on them. There are real plane fights, and games based on them. Why isn’t there a real version of brutal arena-contained mass-murder?

(By the way, this is tongue-in-cheek. In no way does this reflect my views, or anyone elses. We already have this for real, and it’s called paintballing :D ).

Cheers for reading!
There have been no replies to this thread yet.
Wed 18/12/02 at 17:00
Regular
"Amphib-ophile"
Posts: 856
Waaaaay back in the mists of time, the Romans controlled a lot of Europe. Pretty much all of it, in fact. Back in Rome, leisure time was often spent (by the aristocrats, at least) in a coliseum, watching well-oiled, well-muscled men fight each other with pointy sticks, and fight wild animals with really long pointy sticks. People often got hurt. More often than not, they died.

Mankind has evolved slightly since those hazy days. Instead of brutally murdering our fellow men in the name of entertainment, we kill them in the name of ‘peace and justice’ (at least, the USA does, but that’s another matter entirely). Anyways, most people prefer to blow each other apart using exceedingly violent computer games, such as Quake and Unreal Tournament. A strange concept, since (most of) these people would never dream of mutilating someone else in real life. Then I noticed how popular these games were becoming as a spectator sport, particularly at events such as the recent LANArena tournament in Nottingham. It got me wondering – in the future, what if this kind of arena fighting happened for REAL?

Picture this – old abandoned buildings and open spaces given a new lease of life by allowing people – ex-convicts, say – to kill each other with ridiculously powerful weapons for the benefit of an audience baying for blood. Hey, we do it with c***-fighting, why not do it with people? Maybe there could be some sort of prize, like a reduced sentence for the winner (although extra years could be added on secretly because of all the murders committed during the fight :) ).

Now, this might come across as a bit sick to some of you more conservative readers, so some sort of middle ground would have to be found. Maybe censored versions of the show could be televised before the watershed (like Robot Wars – the adult version is much more extreme…). Or possibly the contestants could only use laser-based weapons – instant cauterisation, so no gore!

Surely this could work in somewhere like America. Hell, violence is part of everyday life over there – why not make it a form of entertainment? Profiles could be built up over the best fighters, and leagues and teams could be set up: Prison against prison, that kind of thing. What’s to stop a worldwide league of armed convicts shooting each other in massive hi-tech arenas? It’s just the sort of thing that should appeal to the fight-hungry people of the world!

There will always be those who protest against such animalistic behaviour. Politicians, journalists, human rights activists…I say: Throw them in to, and see if they don’t start killing their fellow man! Obviously they’ll die if they don’t, but hey…

Games based on this format are hugely successful, so why can’t we try it for real? There are real races, and games based on them. There are real plane fights, and games based on them. Why isn’t there a real version of brutal arena-contained mass-murder?

(By the way, this is tongue-in-cheek. In no way does this reflect my views, or anyone elses. We already have this for real, and it’s called paintballing :D ).

Cheers for reading!

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