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Gerrid: That concludes ANOTHER tour of our fine university. Any questions?
J Savo: This place sucks!
Gerrid: OY! You were here last time! Skedaddle! Anyway, since we have about 10 minutes spare, I guess I should tell you about last years Road Trip, which took place shortly after the tour last year…
-0-0-0-0-
(Dark) Mark: Oy, new bloke, over here!
WS: Yes?
Rick(Rickoss): You own a car, right?
WS: Uh-huh
Mark: We're gonna have to borrow it for a while.
Matt(Hercules): Yeah, um, we're going, er, somewhere…
Rick: Yeah, so, er, can we borrow it then?
WS: Only if I can come!
Chips: I guess you'll have to.
(AfroJoe) AJ: Yeah, now, um, let's see. Your car seats seven, and there's six of us, so we'll need another.
DW: Ooh, ooh, me!
Mark: Bah.
AJ: Yeah, DW'll do fine. Now, I guess we should get moving. Afghanistan's a long way away.
WS: you're taking my car to Afghan territory?
AJ: Hah, no, 'twas a joke. Anyway, is the stuff in the car?
Chips: Yep, we're good to go.
*WS starts the car, and pulls away, nearly knocking the PE teacher over*
-= Three hours later =-
Mark: For the fifth time, we have no bloody ticket. We have no money, so therefore have no intention of buying a funning ticket!
MoJoJoJo: Well, you're not getting on my ferry!
Matt: Oh no, pirates!
MoJo: Where?
Matt: DRIVE!
*MoJo doesn't see them boarding the ferry, as he is fascinated with the seagulls*
DW: Nice trick back there Matt, with the Pirates. Heh, and he believed it!
Matt: But there were pirates…
Chips: We really should stop you drinking lucozade.
Matt: … and they were jolly…
Mark: Well, you know what? On the last Road trip, I had the Squits, and now, I don't!
DW: You mean, it was all runny…
*Rick chokes on his burger with the comment*
Mark: Yes, anything else?
~PA announcement~: We will be shortly arriving in France, land of wine, stinky cheese…
AJ: Cheese!
PA: …and suspect accents. Please return to your cars.
*When they got off of the ferry, they pulled into the duty free shop on the French coast*
AJ: Whoa! Look at all the cheese!
Mark: Look at the alcohol!
Matt: Look at the boobs!
Rick: No Matt, they're melons…
Matt: AND?
Rick: NO, melons, as in the fruit…
Chips: Look at the electronics!
Mark: There's booze and all you can think about is electronics?
Chips: I didn't get the name Chips for nothing…
*After stocking up on Beer, Brie and a DVD player, they set off again*
WS: How about a singsong?
Mark: Sing and die!
DW: Er, I spy?
Mark: I spy a fist coming for your face…
AJ: GET ORF OF MY HERMANTRUDE!
Chips: Um, I think I'll take away that cheese now…
AJ: Losing… energy… need… cheese…
DW: Wow, my first beer!
Mark: Heh, I drink this stuff as if it's water.
DW: What's so good about it anyway? I mean, you get a hangover after a sip…
Mark: YOU GET A HANGOVER FROM A SIP? HAH!
DW: It's not my fault, I'd much rather prefer a nice glass of milk instead of a beer.
AJ: MILK! MOTHER OF CHEESE!
Chips: Hey, easy man. Now, where exactly are we going?
Rick: Erm, I say we go skiing in Austria!
Mark: Germany, home of beer.
Matt: Holland, for obvious reasons… *cough*
DW: Spain, because it's hot.
WS: Greece, because we can get arrested for plane spotting!
*Everyone stares at WS*
AJ: CHEESE FACTORY!
Chips: Er… how about we to all of those places, but only if I get to go to Switzerland.
Mark: Aye, be it a good idea. Now, where do we go first? *Looks at map* Hmm… there's a cheese factory about half a mile down this road.
AJ: CHEESE!
Chips: Right, we go there, then onto Spain.
Rick: Then Germany, Austria, Holland, then onto Switzerland, Greece, before finally coming home.
Chips: Good job we have three months spare, so we get… 30 minutes at the cheese factory, and roughly 2 weeks everywhere else, plus traveling.
Matt: We're here!
*They clamber out of the car, and gaze at the cheese factory*
AJ: CHEESE!
*They enter the factory and decide to take the "Cheese through the ages" tour.
Froots: *Slight French accent* Through Ze years, cheese has, how you say, tasty become.
Mark: c'mon let's go.
Froots: No, you need to taste ze cheese.
AJ: You heard the man!
Rick: Erm, couldn't we just take some with us?
Chips: Yeah, we have a tight schedule to keep to.
Froots: Yis, OK is this. Ze cheese is over there.
*They take the cheese, clamber back into the car, and set off for the next location*
DW: Right, where do we go first? Ah yes, Spain, the country of my choice.
-= Four hours, two toilet stops and three pounds of cheese later=-
DW: Um… there, I like that hotel!
Matt: Hotel? We have no money…
WS: hey, I'm a king in Spain, they'll let us own the place if I asked…
DW: Yeah! My private hotel!
WS: OK, let me do the talking.
*He talks to the manager, who hands over the hotel for two weeks*
WS: Right, all ours. So, um, we have two weeks, a five star hotel and endless amounts of spending power in the hotel shop, er, let's go!
*DW goes to the pool, followed by WS, Chips and Rick go to the casino, Mark goes to the bar, and Matt and AJ go to the arcade*
DW: Ahhh… this is the life!
WS: The pool's great!
*In the casino*
Rick: Hey, Chips, gimme some Chips…
*Both burst out laughing*
*Mark enters*
Mark: What you laydee's laughing about?
Chips: Oh, nothing, no, er, time to rig the machines!
*In the arcade*
Matt: woo! Virtual wrestling!
AJ: Yay! Harvest moon! Time to milk some cows and produce cheese!
*Two weeks pass, and after Rick, Chips and Mark raid the casino for all its money, they leave*
Matt: You mean, we’re pretty much multi-billionaires?
Rick: Yep…
AJ: Wooooo!
Mark: Time to go to Germany, stock up on booze, and drink until the cows come home…
-= After a slow and tiring 6 hour journey, they arrive in Germany =-
Mark: I've seen heaven and it's full of hops!
DW: *Hic* Meh… *hic*
Chips: Here, look, the Mercedes factory, if we were to buy a van, we could stock up on so much beer…
WS: but my car?
Chips: Buy a Mercedes convertible!
-= 3,600,000 of our finest British pounds later =-
Mark: Wahey, look at all the booze!
Rick: And we're ahead in schedule…
Chips: I say we go onto Austria and ski for an extra week.
Matt: Yep, but first, we need ski stuff…
*Our fellow travelers eventually arrived in Austria, after buying tons of Skiwear*
Rick: Time to take to the slope's guys!
Chips: *Pulls goggles over eyes* Yep.
Matt: I'm snowboarding.
AJ: Same here! Heh, I'll look like that Eddy guy from SSX!
WS: I'll be on a skidoo!
DW: I'll be with a fit instructor…
Mark: And I'll be in the lodge drinking!
*Rickoss and Chips set off down the slopes, AJ and Matt headed for the designated snowboarding areas, Mark checked out the local women in the lodge, DW put on his learning skis and nearly cried when the instructor turned out to be a man, and WS was nipping along on his skidoo for the majority of the three weeks*
Rick: Well, I'm knackered, how about you guys?
Matt: Yep, I'm so tired I could sleep…
Mark: what?
Matt: I mean, sleep for ages…
AJ: I'm still pumped on that cheese!
DW: Hmmm… judging by the map we drew on my Etch-a-sketcher, we should be heading to Holland now…
Matt: Oh yes, Holland! I'm sure we'll all love this one guys…
-= They arrived in Holland, after a long drive =-
Rick: Look Matt, over there on that corner, see those, er, 'hookers'?
Matt: Yeah, what about them?
Rick: Er… that was the reason we came to Holland, yes?
Matt: Ha-ha-ha! No, I have a fascination with windmills.
Rick: You mean, we're going to be looking at windmills for two weeks?
Matt: Yep!
Mark: Excuse me if I sit in the van for two weeks.
*Matt ran wild for two weeks, studying every windmill he could find*
-0-0-0-0-0
J Savo: You're not going to tell us about the windmills?
Gerrid: No, it's incredibly boring. Now, back to the story, ah, yes. Our mad and somewhat drunk adventurers were heading off to Switzerland…
-0-0-0-0-0
AJ: What are we going to do in Switzerland when we get there Chips?
Chips: What's Switzerland famous for?
Matt: Erm… Switzer's?
Chips: CHCOCLATE!
AJ: CHEESE!
*In unison*
AJ + Chips: CHOCOLATE CHEESE!
*After stocking up on chocolate, our friends headed off to Greece, the last destination of their travels*
WS: Oooh-yeah! We're finally going to Greece!
Mark: we're not going plane spotting, are we?
WS: God no, I have something planned, something that we should have done in Holland, had we been given the chance… *stares at Matt*
-= Greece =-
WS: Right, here we are. "Mamma Panyoutti's House of Girls!"
Mark: Yes! Much better than sheep, er, Beer!
Chips: Much better than chocolate!
DW: Much better than lying by a pool!
Rick: Much better than skiing!
Matt: Much, much better than windmills!
AJ: Cheese isn't as good as this…
WS: Right, it's settled, we spend the rest of our endless amount of money here!
*After two weeks of, er, 'spending' everyone emerges from the house, drained of energy, and clamber back into the car*
Matt: Time to go home guys, well, back to Uni anyway…
Rick: Yep, and we still have tons of money too!
Mark: And beer!
AJ: And cheese!
Chips: Yep, there really is no better road trip than this…
-0-0-0-0-0-0
Gerrid: There it is. Who knows? Maybe, by next year, they'll have gone on another road trip this year…
THE END
Ta for reading
Chips
J Savo: This place sucks!
Gerrid: OY! You were here last time! Skedaddle! Anyway, since we have about 10 minutes spare, I guess I should tell you about last years Road Trip, which took place shortly after the tour last year…
-0-0-0-0-
(Dark) Mark: Oy, new bloke, over here!
WS: Yes?
Rick(Rickoss): You own a car, right?
WS: Uh-huh
Mark: We're gonna have to borrow it for a while.
Matt(Hercules): Yeah, um, we're going, er, somewhere…
Rick: Yeah, so, er, can we borrow it then?
WS: Only if I can come!
Chips: I guess you'll have to.
(AfroJoe) AJ: Yeah, now, um, let's see. Your car seats seven, and there's six of us, so we'll need another.
DW: Ooh, ooh, me!
Mark: Bah.
AJ: Yeah, DW'll do fine. Now, I guess we should get moving. Afghanistan's a long way away.
WS: you're taking my car to Afghan territory?
AJ: Hah, no, 'twas a joke. Anyway, is the stuff in the car?
Chips: Yep, we're good to go.
*WS starts the car, and pulls away, nearly knocking the PE teacher over*
-= Three hours later =-
Mark: For the fifth time, we have no bloody ticket. We have no money, so therefore have no intention of buying a funning ticket!
MoJoJoJo: Well, you're not getting on my ferry!
Matt: Oh no, pirates!
MoJo: Where?
Matt: DRIVE!
*MoJo doesn't see them boarding the ferry, as he is fascinated with the seagulls*
DW: Nice trick back there Matt, with the Pirates. Heh, and he believed it!
Matt: But there were pirates…
Chips: We really should stop you drinking lucozade.
Matt: … and they were jolly…
Mark: Well, you know what? On the last Road trip, I had the Squits, and now, I don't!
DW: You mean, it was all runny…
*Rick chokes on his burger with the comment*
Mark: Yes, anything else?
~PA announcement~: We will be shortly arriving in France, land of wine, stinky cheese…
AJ: Cheese!
PA: …and suspect accents. Please return to your cars.
*When they got off of the ferry, they pulled into the duty free shop on the French coast*
AJ: Whoa! Look at all the cheese!
Mark: Look at the alcohol!
Matt: Look at the boobs!
Rick: No Matt, they're melons…
Matt: AND?
Rick: NO, melons, as in the fruit…
Chips: Look at the electronics!
Mark: There's booze and all you can think about is electronics?
Chips: I didn't get the name Chips for nothing…
*After stocking up on Beer, Brie and a DVD player, they set off again*
WS: How about a singsong?
Mark: Sing and die!
DW: Er, I spy?
Mark: I spy a fist coming for your face…
AJ: GET ORF OF MY HERMANTRUDE!
Chips: Um, I think I'll take away that cheese now…
AJ: Losing… energy… need… cheese…
DW: Wow, my first beer!
Mark: Heh, I drink this stuff as if it's water.
DW: What's so good about it anyway? I mean, you get a hangover after a sip…
Mark: YOU GET A HANGOVER FROM A SIP? HAH!
DW: It's not my fault, I'd much rather prefer a nice glass of milk instead of a beer.
AJ: MILK! MOTHER OF CHEESE!
Chips: Hey, easy man. Now, where exactly are we going?
Rick: Erm, I say we go skiing in Austria!
Mark: Germany, home of beer.
Matt: Holland, for obvious reasons… *cough*
DW: Spain, because it's hot.
WS: Greece, because we can get arrested for plane spotting!
*Everyone stares at WS*
AJ: CHEESE FACTORY!
Chips: Er… how about we to all of those places, but only if I get to go to Switzerland.
Mark: Aye, be it a good idea. Now, where do we go first? *Looks at map* Hmm… there's a cheese factory about half a mile down this road.
AJ: CHEESE!
Chips: Right, we go there, then onto Spain.
Rick: Then Germany, Austria, Holland, then onto Switzerland, Greece, before finally coming home.
Chips: Good job we have three months spare, so we get… 30 minutes at the cheese factory, and roughly 2 weeks everywhere else, plus traveling.
Matt: We're here!
*They clamber out of the car, and gaze at the cheese factory*
AJ: CHEESE!
*They enter the factory and decide to take the "Cheese through the ages" tour.
Froots: *Slight French accent* Through Ze years, cheese has, how you say, tasty become.
Mark: c'mon let's go.
Froots: No, you need to taste ze cheese.
AJ: You heard the man!
Rick: Erm, couldn't we just take some with us?
Chips: Yeah, we have a tight schedule to keep to.
Froots: Yis, OK is this. Ze cheese is over there.
*They take the cheese, clamber back into the car, and set off for the next location*
DW: Right, where do we go first? Ah yes, Spain, the country of my choice.
-= Four hours, two toilet stops and three pounds of cheese later=-
DW: Um… there, I like that hotel!
Matt: Hotel? We have no money…
WS: hey, I'm a king in Spain, they'll let us own the place if I asked…
DW: Yeah! My private hotel!
WS: OK, let me do the talking.
*He talks to the manager, who hands over the hotel for two weeks*
WS: Right, all ours. So, um, we have two weeks, a five star hotel and endless amounts of spending power in the hotel shop, er, let's go!
*DW goes to the pool, followed by WS, Chips and Rick go to the casino, Mark goes to the bar, and Matt and AJ go to the arcade*
DW: Ahhh… this is the life!
WS: The pool's great!
*In the casino*
Rick: Hey, Chips, gimme some Chips…
*Both burst out laughing*
*Mark enters*
Mark: What you laydee's laughing about?
Chips: Oh, nothing, no, er, time to rig the machines!
*In the arcade*
Matt: woo! Virtual wrestling!
AJ: Yay! Harvest moon! Time to milk some cows and produce cheese!
*Two weeks pass, and after Rick, Chips and Mark raid the casino for all its money, they leave*
Matt: You mean, we’re pretty much multi-billionaires?
Rick: Yep…
AJ: Wooooo!
Mark: Time to go to Germany, stock up on booze, and drink until the cows come home…
-= After a slow and tiring 6 hour journey, they arrive in Germany =-
Mark: I've seen heaven and it's full of hops!
DW: *Hic* Meh… *hic*
Chips: Here, look, the Mercedes factory, if we were to buy a van, we could stock up on so much beer…
WS: but my car?
Chips: Buy a Mercedes convertible!
-= 3,600,000 of our finest British pounds later =-
Mark: Wahey, look at all the booze!
Rick: And we're ahead in schedule…
Chips: I say we go onto Austria and ski for an extra week.
Matt: Yep, but first, we need ski stuff…
*Our fellow travelers eventually arrived in Austria, after buying tons of Skiwear*
Rick: Time to take to the slope's guys!
Chips: *Pulls goggles over eyes* Yep.
Matt: I'm snowboarding.
AJ: Same here! Heh, I'll look like that Eddy guy from SSX!
WS: I'll be on a skidoo!
DW: I'll be with a fit instructor…
Mark: And I'll be in the lodge drinking!
*Rickoss and Chips set off down the slopes, AJ and Matt headed for the designated snowboarding areas, Mark checked out the local women in the lodge, DW put on his learning skis and nearly cried when the instructor turned out to be a man, and WS was nipping along on his skidoo for the majority of the three weeks*
Rick: Well, I'm knackered, how about you guys?
Matt: Yep, I'm so tired I could sleep…
Mark: what?
Matt: I mean, sleep for ages…
AJ: I'm still pumped on that cheese!
DW: Hmmm… judging by the map we drew on my Etch-a-sketcher, we should be heading to Holland now…
Matt: Oh yes, Holland! I'm sure we'll all love this one guys…
-= They arrived in Holland, after a long drive =-
Rick: Look Matt, over there on that corner, see those, er, 'hookers'?
Matt: Yeah, what about them?
Rick: Er… that was the reason we came to Holland, yes?
Matt: Ha-ha-ha! No, I have a fascination with windmills.
Rick: You mean, we're going to be looking at windmills for two weeks?
Matt: Yep!
Mark: Excuse me if I sit in the van for two weeks.
*Matt ran wild for two weeks, studying every windmill he could find*
-0-0-0-0-0
J Savo: You're not going to tell us about the windmills?
Gerrid: No, it's incredibly boring. Now, back to the story, ah, yes. Our mad and somewhat drunk adventurers were heading off to Switzerland…
-0-0-0-0-0
AJ: What are we going to do in Switzerland when we get there Chips?
Chips: What's Switzerland famous for?
Matt: Erm… Switzer's?
Chips: CHCOCLATE!
AJ: CHEESE!
*In unison*
AJ + Chips: CHOCOLATE CHEESE!
*After stocking up on chocolate, our friends headed off to Greece, the last destination of their travels*
WS: Oooh-yeah! We're finally going to Greece!
Mark: we're not going plane spotting, are we?
WS: God no, I have something planned, something that we should have done in Holland, had we been given the chance… *stares at Matt*
-= Greece =-
WS: Right, here we are. "Mamma Panyoutti's House of Girls!"
Mark: Yes! Much better than sheep, er, Beer!
Chips: Much better than chocolate!
DW: Much better than lying by a pool!
Rick: Much better than skiing!
Matt: Much, much better than windmills!
AJ: Cheese isn't as good as this…
WS: Right, it's settled, we spend the rest of our endless amount of money here!
*After two weeks of, er, 'spending' everyone emerges from the house, drained of energy, and clamber back into the car*
Matt: Time to go home guys, well, back to Uni anyway…
Rick: Yep, and we still have tons of money too!
Mark: And beer!
AJ: And cheese!
Chips: Yep, there really is no better road trip than this…
-0-0-0-0-0-0
Gerrid: There it is. Who knows? Maybe, by next year, they'll have gone on another road trip this year…
THE END
Ta for reading
Chips
Page:
gerrid wrote:
> Chips:
> King of the subtle pop?
No, I'm just polite.
:D
> Chips:
> King of the subtle pop?
No, I'm just polite.
:D
Chips:
King of the subtle pop?
King of the subtle pop?
Thanks :)
Lol! Excellent Chips, genius ;-)
POP! Great post needs a popping. MUAH.
I've read better posts than this!
I lie a lot too.
Excellent stuff.
;-)
I lie a lot too.
Excellent stuff.
;-)
Meh, what happened here? Miami? :D
Cheers guys.
Cheers guys.
I second Hammond
Brilliant post Microchips.
Whitestripes wrote:
> Of course it is you pillock
> To say it's impossible to know someone who lives in the same area as
> you, however big it is, is to be a prat.
> And I have no idea where he lives
But, you see, your friend is probably dead.
> Of course it is you pillock
> To say it's impossible to know someone who lives in the same area as
> you, however big it is, is to be a prat.
> And I have no idea where he lives
But, you see, your friend is probably dead.
Page: